Panties for Sale

by York, Mattie

  Alex reached over and squeezed Chieko’s arm.

  “I didn’t want to talk to Angela about it. I am angry at her too. I think she was using me. Or maybe she was just not telling me the whole story. Manipulating me. That’s the word. I don’t know. I know it was my choice. I only saw what I wanted to see. Don’t worry, I called Angela yesterday, I told her what happened. She already knew, can you believe it? Ahmed found Saul when he went up to the hotel room looking for me. Angela said she banned him from the agency. She sent his name, his photo and credit details around to the other agencies.” Chieko shrugged. “I don’t care. I still quit.”

  “Yeah, I guess that’s good. But, wow! Chieko! Good for you! You know, standing up for yourself. Did you really kick this Saul’s ass?”

  “Yes, I got him good.”

  Alex shook her head in awe. She should really learn how to do that, she thought.

  “It hurts,” Chieko said after a while, “you know? Yes, what Saul did, hitting me, that hurt. That really hurt. A lot. But I think I was already hurt before. Having sex,” Chieko lowered her voice, “you know, with all these different men. Trying so hard to please them. Even when I tried to do dominatrix, it wasn’t me. Do you know, after every appointment, I always felt awful. So sad. I tried to push myself to do more. I thought if I just had more money, you know?” Chieko reached over and grabbed a tassel on her hand bag. One by one, she began pulling the threads apart. “When I was tired and when my stomach ached, I should have stopped then.”

  “So, what happened to you? You said you are not together with Joseph?”

  “No, we are finished.”

  “Are you ok?”

  “I will be,” she smiled at Chieko. “I think I’m going to leave for a while. Go stay up north with my parents. I don’t know. I know if I stay here, Joseph will find me and somehow convince me to go back to him. I’m still a little bit weak where he is concerned.”

  “But why don’t you go back? I’m sure you can fix it. It doesn’t have to end because of one small fight. I thought you said he was perfect for you?”

  “I thought so.”

  “Will you go back to escorting?”

  “No,” Alex shook her head, “No, I don’t think I could handle that again.”

  “It’s funny, did you notice? We are both leaving. We did so much for money and now we are running away from it.”

  “Yeah, I guess we know better now. Easy money is never easy.”

  “Ah, very wise. I’m not going to have sex for a very long time.”

  Alex nodded, silently agreeing with Chieko. “Well, I guess I should get going”

  “Oh, me too,” Chieko stood up.

  Alex stood up and gave Chieko a hug. “I am really happy that we met,” she squeezed her tight, “I know you will be ok. You are strong, so strong. You surprise me! No, this will not stop you. You are a special person, Chieko,” Alex grinned. “We should keep in touch. Email me? Let me know how you are making out in Japan.”

  “Yes, ok. Do you have a pen?”

  “Oh yes, wait a sec,” Alex dug into her purse. As she pulled out her organizer, a few papers fell out. As Alex found a blank sheet and scribbled her name and email address down, Chieko bent down and collected them for her. “Thanks,” Alex said as Chieko handed her the papers, “just a pile of old receipts. I really need to get organized.” She laughed and walked over to the trash can. She was just about to throw the papers away when she noticed something. A smaller square of thick paper was sticking out from the receipts. Curiously, Alex unfolded it, and her heart skipped a beat. It was a strip of photos. Four photos of Joseph and her, smiling and laughing. In the last one Joseph was leaning over, kissing her cheek as she smiled into the camera. Tears filled her eyes as she remembered the day they had taken those photos. She had spent the whole afternoon with Joseph wandering around Harbourfront, strolling hand in hand, eating ice cream and looking at the sailing boats. Alex had discovered the photo stall tucked away in a corner of Harbourfront Centre and begged Joseph to take pictures with her. She blushed as she remembered what she had to promise him to get Joseph to do it, and how much fun he had accepting that promise on the next two photo strips, which she didn’t keep. Alex smiled. She looked so happy in the photos, so in love.

  “What is it?” Chieko asked.

  “Oh,” Alex smiled, wiping her eyes, “it’s nothing. I just found some old pictures. Me and Joseph. I know I’m being silly,” she held up the pictures. “He was handsome though, wasn’t he?”

  Chieko froze. She grabbed the photos from Alex and looked at them closely. Could it really be him? But he looked so nice and kind and charming, but no, Chieko was certain. It was Saul Forester. “Well? What do you think?”

  Chieko looked up at Alex. She had no idea. Suddenly, the room started to spin. Chieko reached out and grabbed the table to stop from falling. The photo dropped to the floor. “Are you ok?” Alex grabbed Chieko to steady her.

  Chieko swallowed hard. “Oh, I just, I felt dizzy for a second,” she took a deep breath of air. “I must have forgotten to eat breakfast. And then the latte.”

  “How can you forget to eat?” Alex bent down to pick up the photo and put it carefully away in her organizer. “Are you sure you are ok? Can I get you something?”

  “No, no. Thank you. I’m fine. I’m already late for an appointment with my travel agent, so I really must go. I’ll feel better when I’m outside anyways. It is hot in here.”

  “Yes, I guess it does seem hot. I’ll walk you to the door.”

  Chieko gave Alex a weak smile.

  “So you didn’t say,” Alex looked at Chieko as they reached the door, “didn’t you think Joseph was handsome?”

  Chieko’s heart sank. She looked up at Alex. Her pretty face was so innocent, so trusting, and still so hopeful. “Yes,” Chieko nodded her head and pushed open the door, “very handsome.”

  With one last wave goodbye, the girls turned and walked in opposite directions down the busy street.

  “Sex with love is like chocolate cake. 3 layers of the richest, moistest velvety smooth devil’s food chocolate cake, with the slightest hint of cinnamon. Freshly baked with an inch of sublimely creamy chocolate icing between layers with even more frosting spread lusciously and generously on top. The kind of cake that makes your mouth salivate and your heart raise in anticipation when you get just the faintest whiff of that sweet, sultry buttery chocolate aroma. The kind of cake that is sooo good it hurts as your taste buds explode with the first bite. The kind of cake that melts in your mouth, coating your teeth and the roof of your mouth in sweet luscious scintillating chocolate. The kind of cake that you can’t get enough of. You lick your lips and suck your fingers with ravenous hunger and orgasmic joy. The kind of cake that sends waves of pleasure and longing and fulfillment soaring through your body when you pause to think about it. The kind of cake that you can eat as much as you want. And you will never get fat.”

  -Elixia Gold Stewart

  “Sex without love is like a fake Gucci bag. It doesn’t really matter where you got it; from a friend, a market stall, on the street or out of the trunk of a car in a dark alley. It doesn’t matter how much you paid for it. It may look real. So real that many will be fooled. Some will envy you. But only if they don’t look too closely. Because, if they did, they would see what you already know. That no matter how much you wish it was different, it will always be just a cheap imitation of the real thing. And it will fall apart.”

  -Chieko Nakano