A Soul Mate's Promise

by Soprano, Robin H

  Toby spots me instantly and almost runs me down before I squat down and let him give me hello licks like I’ve been gone for days instead of two hours!

  Inside on the table is a big antipasti platter of meats and cheeses, all kinds of olives, bright red roasted peppers and roasted garlic cloves with sliced roma tomatoes. I put the bread on the table as Sal opens a bottle of Sangiovese wine. My stomach grumbled loudly. Tony grinned at me.

  “Ah, mio caro, you-a-hungry? Good! Manga.. eat, eat!!”

  Sal cut up the bread, and I was making myself a sandwich and scooping olives and stuff onto my plate in no time!

  “Hey look at that! Sal said, a girl who actually eats! You don’t see that very often.”

  Tony laughed. “Oh yeah she’s a good gal she lova-to-eat not shy, it’s a good thing.”

  I take a bite of my sandwich and smile when Sal notices I’m not shy around food. “I’m no fun when I’m hungry and I don’t want to be cranky.”

  “You are-a-beautiful, Gracie, just the way you are...You agree, Sal?” Tony winks.

  Sal looks up from his plate. “Yes, Pop, she is quite unique. One might say, passionate, complex and voluptuous.”

  I almost choke on my food, and grab for my glass of wine to wash it down before I do. “Geeez, thanks guys!”

  Tony shoots Sal a look intended to knock him off his chair. “Hey, hey..”

  “Pop no, it’s a compliment. I’m sorry, Gracie. Did I offend you?”

  I cut them both off with raise hands. “Absolutely not! I need the boost. Thank you!”

  Tony mutters something in Italian then looks to me “ if-a-my son talks outta line you have-a-my permission to smack ‘em in-a-the head, yes?”

  “Pop!” yells Sal.

  I laugh “This is great–makes me feel like home. I miss my family.”

  Tony reaches for my hand. “You are home, Caro. Ti adoro, la mia casa `e la tua casa.”

  I almost cry and again gulp my wine to get myself collected. I adore him as well and he knows this.

  After lunch, I sit on a lounger and tuck my legs underneath me. I expect Toby to join me but he is busy sniffing around the deck. After a few minutes Sal and Tony come out to join me. Sal sits next to me at the end of the lounge chair. In less than a minute, he is almost nose to nose with Toby, who maneuvered himself in between us with a whiney growl.

  “Okay, enough.” Sal chuckles. He puts his hands up. “What’s the deal with your dog? Why doesn’t he like me?”

  I giggle. “You gotta give him time. He’s just used to me and Tony. I guess he’s a little over protective.”

  “You guess? This dog is like a trained Navy Seal! Where’d you get him?”

  “You know it was the strangest thing,” I began. “Not long after Rich and I started to break up, I was walking on the beach one morning and this dog ran up to me. No collar on him, and I thought, how weird a full breed shepherd pup wondering alone on the beach. He followed me home. After a few hours, I realized he was trained and everything! Your dad told me to give him a name and some love, so I kept him. I took him to the vet and they said judging by his teeth, he was about one year old and very healthy.

  “Oh really?” Sal says with a smirk. “And Pop told you to keep him? Hmmm…” He glanced at his dad from the corner of his eye as he spoke. “Interesting.”

  I wonder what that look is about, but I’m too cozy to really care. “Yeah, I’m glad I did, because he has been a wonderful companion for me.” Reaching down to give Toby a little scratch between his ears. “Really, Pop? He was just wander…”

  “Ahemm!” Antonio clears his throat, cutting off Sal’s sentence., “..Ahh..does-a-anybody want something sweet? Ahh.. ahh.. I gotta ice-a-cream inside. Sal, go get-a-the ice cream…”

  “Oh, none for me, I’m so full, and I’m enjoying my wine,” I say, still curious about what’s going on between them.

  “Yeah, me either Pop,” Sal says, still giving his dad a questionable look.

  “Okay, then no ice cream,” he cuts in. “Did you bring-a-the copy’s of your papers from Leonard?”

  “Yes, I have them,.” Sal says as he gets to his feet. In a moment he’s back with them and hands them to his father.

  I sigh loudly. “I almost had a panic attack when I looked at them.”

  “Ah,” Tony shrugged. “Don’t worry, Caro. It’s all right.”

  “Sal actually helped me to calm down,” I say, giving Sal a smile.

  “Did he?” Tony asks as he’s reading the paperwork.

  “Yeah, it was nice,” I say with a little laughter in my tone. “Very gentlemanly, coming to my rescue and all.”

  “Oh really, Son? You helped her huh? Good…good….”

  The two men exchanged looks a few more times. I don’t want to pry so I ignore it.

  We drink wine, laugh and chatted the afternoon away. Tony’s asleep in his chair by the time the sun disappears.

  “Maybe you should put him to bed,” I whisper to Sal.

  “Yeah, Pop’s just can’t hang like he used to,” he jokes. We chuckle quietly.

  “I guess I should probably go,” I say, struggling to get to my feet from the lounge. Toby gets up, too. “Tell Tony thank you for a great afternoon. Everything was wonderful.”

  “Hey, ahh, Let me walk you to your door. Please.”

  “Okay,” I say with a shrug, “if you really want to.”

  Sal walks me with Toby flanking behind, over the stone path, back to my lanai and over to the French doors that enter the backside of the house.

  I put the key in, unlock the door, and flip on some lights. As I turn to thank him, Sal snakes an arm around my waist and gently pulls me into him.

  Looking into my eyes he slowly dove in, bent his head and gave me a warm, soft kiss. I’m stunned, then my blood seems to boil at the same time my knees get weak and I relax and lean against him. As the kiss gets more intense and deeper, I put my arms around his neck. I don’t want it to stop. After a long moment, he puts his hands on my face and slowly pulls away, keeping our foreheads together.

  “Are you okay with this?” he whispers.

  I can’t speak. I nod my head. In the pale light, he smiles, bends to take my lips with his again. This time, I gave as deep as he did, I taste his tongue in my mouth. When he finally steps away, he reaches up with his fingers and brushes the hair out of my eyes.

  “That was nice. I’ll see you tomorrow? Early, on the beach?” he whispers, as out of breath as I am.

  “A.aa..a yeah, okay,” I stutter.

  He takes a slight step back and grabs my chin with his thumb and index finger and raises my face a bit to look into my eyes. He smiles and lets out a little chuckle. “Sleep good tonight, Princess.”

  * * *

  Over at Antonio’s, Sal came back up the deck and saw that his father was awake. They stared at each other for a long minute.

  “Son, you walk-a Gracie home?”

  “Yeah, Pop, she’s home.”

  “Did you kiss her.”

  Sal looked away from his dad. “Pop, let’s get you to bed.” Sal started over to his wheelchair.

  Antonio put up his hands and pushed at Sal. “I don’t need-a-help. I asked you a question!” he spoke louder.

  “Yeah. Yes!” Sal snapped. “Yes, I kissed her.”

  Antonio nodded his head, looked up at his son and waved for him to come closer. Sal leaned down a little. “What, Pop?”

  Antonio reached up and smacked him across the face.

  Sal stood holding the side of his face. “Shit that stings! Pop what the hell was that for?”

  Antonio pointed a shaky finger at his son, his face furious. “You watch it with her, she is-a-good gal. She has had lots of heartbreak and my son is not-a-gonna come and add to her sadness. What now, you here for good? Or you go away again and-a-don’t come back? Then she cry to me over you, you, he nearly shouted.

  “No, Sal, if you feel for Gracie, do the right thing, and no games with her. I don’t know how mu
ch more she can take!”

  Sal rubbed at his face and hair. “I know, Pop, I know…”

  Antonio cut him off. “You tell-a-her your life and intentions and let her see if she wants to continue…she is not a fling!”

  “I know, Pop,” Sal said. “I wouldn’t do that, I..I.. I don’t know, I really like her, something about her, she’s calming to me, and I want to just help her, be near her. Protect her.” He shook his head as though trying to clear it. “It’s a strong feeling too, she’s familiar somehow.”

  Antonio knitted his eyebrows together with a look of concern. “I have never seen you have a serious relationship–you feel-a-that strongly about her in this short time?”

  “I never had time to really settle down. You know that, Pop! I’ ve been out saving the world as you say. Dessert Storm, then Iraq, then everywhere that no one knows about. How could I possibly get close to anyone? I’m Secret Service. Sometimes I couldn’t trust the very people I was working with for Christ sake! Look, I’m done. They gave me a nice pension for life and job well done for the country. They told me I was done.”

  “Do you want to be done? Son, you have made that your life’s career, its in-a-your blood. “It would be nice if I can believe you.” Antonio’s face softened. “You are forty-one years old and I would love-a-to see you settle down, and-a- Gracie, she would make you happy, but you gonna have-a-to want it. Are you done? Are you out for good?”

  Sal reached out to his dad’s wheelchair and started pushing him into the house. “Come on lets get to bed,” he said. “And yeah Pop, they told me I was done…”

  “Ahh, that’s-a-not what I asked you, Sal. I don’t care what they say, I want to know what you say. Would you still be there if-a-they didn’t tell you to leave? Is it a break or are you out?”

  “Pop, I’m tired, I don’t want to talk about it. Can’t I just take one day at a time–clear my head and re-group?”

  “Yeah, sure son,” Antonio said, “but you involved someone special into your world now, do the right thing.”

  * * *

  “No! No! When will you be home? Don’t leave me!!”

  I was out of breath, my heart pounding. I was running, but heavy skirts surrounded my legs.

  I reached for who appeared to be Sal. He was on a horse, wearing a blue coat and white breeches with black boots. He was yelling something to me. I couldn’t hear–there was havoc in the street. People were yelling, men were marching.

  “Don’t go!” I yelled to him.

  He circled back to me, the horse stomping all around. I grabbed the reins and he reached down to touch my face.

  “I must go my love, it is my duty. I will fight for what’s right, I shall return to you, I promise!”

  I watched as he road off with other men on horseback. I knew he wouldn’t return. I felt it. I must stop him!

  “NO!” I yelled, “I WILL NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN—NO PLEASE!” But he could not hear me anymore. I tripped over something, fell. I’m out of breath ….

  I sit up in bed panting, gasping for air, my chest heaving.

  Where am I?.. Trying to focus I reach over and turn on the light. Toby grunted.

  I’m wiping sweat off my forehead and unraveling the sheets that are twisted around my legs. By the time I’m untangled, my breathing and heart rate has slowed down.

  “Whew! What a weird nightmare!” This dream seemed like more then just a dream. It still played in my mind with the paralyzing fear and choking sorrow.

  I go into the bathroom to splash water on my face but before I can dry off my face, the images are back and I can smell the air, smell the horses.

  Such sadness…I am overtaken by sadness and begin to shake. “Oookayyy…Gracie, I say aloud, “get it together.” I sit on the cold tile floor of my bathroom for a bit.

  Toby comes in and whines as he looks at me with those big, whiskey eyes. “I’ll be okay,” I tell him with a weak laugh. He doesn’t believe me, I can tell.

  I look over at the counter at my prescription Xanax. Still a bit shaky, I get to my feet, dump a pill in my trembling palm and pour a glass of water.

  I go out of my bedroom door and out on the balcony, for some air. The moon is full and bright, shining on the ocean. The sea air felt cool on my skin. I take some deep cleansing breaths, still feeling strange from the dream – or whatever it was.

  The pill is working as I knew it would. I get back in bed. As I lay there waiting for sleep, I still can’t get the images out of my mind. As I try to breathe through it, I recognize what I’m feeling. It’s grief. Massive, inconsolable, grief.

  CHAPTER 6

  When I wake in the morning I’m jolted out of sleep with memories of the dream – and Sal’s kiss.

  I toss back the covers and do my usual morning routine, dressing in some yoga pants, a Tee shirt and sneakers. By the time I get down the stairs, Toby’s already circling at the door.

  “Alright buddy, just a minute,” I shush him as I approach. We leave the lanai and start over the little wooden overpass to the beach only to run into Sal, standing right in the middle with a hand on either side of the wooden railings blocking the way.

  “Good morning, Princess.” The smooth tone of his voice makes my stomach swirl.

  “Good morning, Sal,” I reply, struggling to meet his gaze.

  We stand for a moment looking at each other in the pre dawn light - then he gives me that little-boy grin and snakes one of his arms around my waist and with just a little force pulls me into him.

  He gently reaches up and pushes a windblown curl out of the way as he holds my face in his hands and bends his head to give me another kiss. I totally surrender and it takes my breath away.

  He pulls away and looks into my eyes. “Ready for a walk?”

  I’m lightheaded and clutch for the railing.

  “Whoa, Gracie, you okay?” He puts his hands on my arms to steady me.

  I shake my head to get the ringing to stop. “Yeah, I’m fine,” I whisper. “I don’t know. I got a little dizzy there.”

  Walking quietly, he takes my hand. “Gracie, I hope I’m not moving too fast, but I have strong feelings for you and they kind of hit me out of the blue. I have to tell you, it’s kind of strange but I feel like I’ve known you forever. I can’t explain it.”

  I look at him and smile. “I know, I feel it, too. I have a pull towards you, have since I first saw you, I think. The thing is, I’m going through a divorce, and I don’t know where I’m going to end up or where I should go. I feel like I’m in limbo and I don’t want to drag you into the mess that is currently my life.”

  He stops walking, and looks at our hands, then raises mine up to his lips and kisses my knuckles. His exhale is warm on my skin.

  “Gracie, let’s just take one day at a time right now. I’ll be here for you. I want you to consider me your friend and I will be patient. I have a lot of time on my hands now and I’ve got my own issues, but I have to tell you, being around you calms me. I feel centered and whole.”

  I can’t believe my ears. “Really? Me? I center you?”

  He chuckles. “Yes, you. Is that so hard to believe?”

  “Well, yes.” I say with a shake of my head. “I guess I never had anyone say that to me before.”

  “Well,” he says with that grin that melts my heart, “first time for everything, Princess.”

  * * *

  Walking back from the beach, fingers entwined, Sal says, “I hope you’re hungry Princess, Pop’s got breakfast going.”

  “He does?” I laugh, enjoying my new-found peace. “I usually cook him something or we just have coffee together. What’s the occasion?”

  Sal shrugs. “He felt like cooking and told me to tell you it’s something you love.”

  “Oh I love everything! I say laughing as we approach the deck. Toby runs ahead of us barking and waging his tail to get into Antonio’s door. “Easy boy, Sal said. As he opened the door for him. He’s in there waiting on you.

  Mio caro, good morn
ing. I make-a-you favorite.

  “Good morning Tony! What did you cook? Is that? Oh My God you made peppers and eggs!”

  “Yes! He says laughing, and some rosemary potatoes too!”

  “Smells great Pop.”

  With Toby underfoot, wagging and nosing around his friend Tony’s wheelchair, Sal and I help Antonio move the food from the kitchen to the table.

  I roll my eyes to the ceiling as I scoop up eggs and peppers and pile them on a fresh roll. Then I take a bite. That walk over the dunes this morning landed me in heaven! “Mmm…. Tony, this is so good! I haven’t had this in a while,” I say around a mouthful of potatoes.

  “It’s been way too long for me, too!” Sal chimes in. “With all the traveling I did for work it’s nice to have home cooked food. By the way, did I tell you how great your baked ziti was Gracie?”

  “Thanks I’m glad you enjoyed it. I enjoyed making it.”

  “Do you like to cook, Gracie?” he asked.

  “Yes, I do,” I answer after I swallow more food., “But I don’t really do much of it, anymore. Cooking and baking was a good stress releaser at one time, but your father and I were both gaining a little weight and I cut back. Not good for me or Tony to get too chubby.”

  “What-a-you talk?” interrupted Tony with a wave if his hand and a frown on his face. “We no get-a-fat! I enjoyed all of the food you make.”

  “Thanks, Tony. You’re very sweet.” I finish the last bite of my egg sandwich and pick up my coffee mug. “I think for me, the saddest time is around the holiday season. There is no one to cook for. A house just isn’t a home if there is no one to cook for.” I sigh and look down at Toby who is laying at my feet. I look up at Sal and Antonio who are looking at me with big, brown puppy-eyes.

  Talk about dumping cold water on a great morning! I clear my throat and give them both a grin and a wink. “Can I have more peppers and eggs please?”

  Sal beats his dad to the serving spoon and I hand him my dish.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound so pitiful. I was raised around a big Italian-American family. Big family and loud holidays is what I’m used to. Now my parents are gone, my brother travels all over the world with his Green Peace stuff, and any other relatives are spread out all over the country. I just miss the holiday family overload, I guess.”