Fractured Soul

by Rachel McClellan

  “I think it’s worth the risk. Liam can take it back to his people to find out exactly what’s in them.”

  “Good idea,” Christian said. “Now let’s seal the box. We’ve been here long enough.”

  Tessa taped the box. Only a careful examination would show that it had been tampered with. When we were finished, Christian and I said good-bye to Tessa and closed the door behind us.

  As soon as we were alone, Christian touched me lightly on the arm. “Are you sure you’re ready for this? With having to deal with everything else?” His eyes flickered to my neck.

  “Honestly? I’m sort of in robot mode. I’ve got a lot of emotions swirling up here,” I pointed to my head, “and if I dwell on any of them for too long, I get a little crazy.” I thought back specifically to when Liam had me “paint” the forest.

  Christian took hold of my hand. “At some point you’re going to have to deal with those emotions.”

  “Sure. One day.” I looked up at the moon’s location in the sky. “I better get back. Get some sleep before tomorrow.”

  “That’s right,” he said. “You have to go to class.”

  “Nice summer break, eh?” I tip-toed and gave him a quick kiss, afraid of letting my lips linger. Too much temptation.

  I was about to turn away when I caught movement, a long shadow, sliding around the corner of the building. “Did you see that?” I asked.

  Christian turned. “Where?”

  I pointed. “Over there. I thought . . .” I paused, not knowing what to say because I wasn’t sure what I’d seen. Something tugged on the edge of my mind.

  “Llona?”

  “Nothing. Never mind. I think I’m just tired.” And I was. I yawned big.

  “Let’s get you back then.” Christian followed me to my dorm building and watched me climb the entire way to my bedroom window. Before I disappeared, I turned around and waved. Christian formed his hand into the shape of a gun, kissed the tip of his finger, and shot me a kiss. I lamely caught it and brought it to my chest.

  * * * * *

  The next morning, I hurried to breakfast to find May and Kiera. The dining room was unusually quiet. Either it was a long night for everyone or the girls subconsciously felt something was wrong. I hoped for the former.

  I spotted Kiera at a table by herself and sat down next to her. “Where’s May?”

  She shrugged. “Haven’t seen her.” Kiera was staring down at her clenched fist, looking serious.

  “What’s wrong?”

  Kiera opened her hand, revealing a tiny blue pill. “It’s just so strange. I’ve taken these all my life. Everyone told me they were good for me. How many more lies have I been told?”

  “I don’t know.” I wished I had something more reassuring to tell her.

  “Yeah, well, what about the rest of them?” She motioned her head toward the other girls. “When are we going to tell them?”

  “We can’t. Not just yet, anyway.”

  “But they’re taking these pills.”

  She was right. The longer they kept taking them, the more danger they’d be in. “I’m seeing Liam later tonight. We’ll figure something out.” I spotted Tessa on the other side of the dinning room clearing off a table. She nodded at me, knowingly. “Are you talking to Abigail today?” I asked Kiera.

  “Yup. I already have a bunch of questions ready to go.”

  “Good.” I stood up. “I’m going to go find May.”

  “Aren’t you going to eat?”

  “I’ll get something later. See you!” I left quickly, anxious to find May. I tried her room first, but no one answered. Where could she be? A couple of younger girls I recognized walked by. “Hey, have you guys seen May?”

  “The Fury?” a girl with bright eyes asked.

  “That’s the one.”

  “I saw her with Dr. Han. Outside.”

  “Thanks,” I said. “And stay safe, okay?”

  They looked at me strangely, but I didn’t stick around to explain.

  I inhaled deeply the moment I stepped outside. The air was warm, and the rising sun promised more heat. I glanced up at the clock tower, already longing for night. Lately, whenever I was outside in the daytime, the light made me feel like I was wearing tight clothes, and it took all my strength just to stay in it. I hurried across campus toward Risen Auditorium, to the section of the building specifically set aside for Furies.

  I knocked on the back door, but when no one answered, I turned the knob and peeked in. It was dark, but every few seconds a flash of orange would barely light up what looked like a small lobby. I moved into it, waited for another flash of light, and then looked around. The light was coming from a long corridor to my right.

  Walking toward it, I passed by several closed doors with room numbers on the walls. At the end of the corridor was a long glass window, sort of like what I’ve seen on a racquetball court. The room beyond the glass was dark except for a soft glow, like candlelight, at the end.

  I looked in just as another burst of light filled the room. My jaw dropped. It wasn’t just light. It was a giant fireball hurdling across a long, gym-like room. The fireball hit a metal plate the size of a kiddy swimming pool and then dissipated. Pieces of ash fell to the floor.

  I turned my head to see who was the source of the spectacular power.

  TWENTY-SIX

  May was standing straight, her arm stretched out. She didn’t seem at all surprised to have just shot hell’s breath from her hand. In fact, she looked rather pleased. I didn’t know whether to be freaked out or impressed. I chose the latter. She was my best friend after all.

  I knocked on the glass. May looked in my direction and waved. Dr. Han appeared at her side to see whom she was waving at. He didn’t smile or wave, just clicked something in his hand. Lights turned on. I found an entrance to my left and made a point to go near Dr. Han, just in case I picked up any Vyken vibes.

  “That was the coolest thing I’ve ever seen,” I said to May.

  “I’ve gotten better, huh?” She couldn’t stop smiling.

  “Better? You’re like a superhero!”

  “This isn’t a comic book, “ Dr. Han said, his face stern.

  “Right. I know. I was just—”

  “She likes to kid around,” May said. “This is Llona Reese, Dr. Han.”

  “I know who she is.” His eyes burrowed into mine. It made me feel funny, not in a fuzzy-head sort of way, but in a definite this-dude’s-got-power way. I stepped back and took a deep breath. Not a Vyken, but not to be messed with either.

  “I missed you at breakfast,” I said. No other words came to my head.

  “I don’t eat breakfast,” Dr. Han said.

  Was I still looking at him? “I mean, May. I missed May at breakfast.” I forced myself to look at her.

  May was brushing her hands off, sprinkling the floor with flakes of ash. “Sorry about that. I wanted to get some practice in early.”

  “You sure work hard,” I said.

  Dr. Han shifted his weight. Or at least I think he did. I got the distinct impression that he had moved, but when I looked at him he was still standing straight, like someone had shoved a stick up his—

  “May is a very talented Fury,” Dr. Han said. “She must work endlessly to control her skills.”

  “Looks like she’s doing that.”

  “No,” he said, and May and I looked at him. “It’s an ongoing battle. We must always control it or it will control us.”

  “Is it hard?” I asked, honestly wanting to know. I knew what it felt like to have something inside you wanting to take over.

  Dr. Han turned to May. “Is it?”

  May blushed. “I’m sort of new to all of this, but so far I haven’t had any problems.”

  Dr. Han leaned forward, bending at the waist until he was almost in May’s face. “That’s because you haven’t been tested yet, but you will. And when the rage comes, you’ll understand what I mean.”

  An intense few seconds passed. I swa
llowed hard before I said, “Good times, huh? Well, I’ve got to go. Catch you later, May.”

  It took her a moment to say, “I’ll come with you. I’ve got to get my books.” She slipped her feet into nearby sandals. “Thanks for meeting with me early, Dr. Han, and about answering my questions.”

  “You girls be careful,” he said. “You’re treading on dangerous ground.”

  I looked at May, but she just nodded and said good-bye. I followed her out, but as soon as we were out of earshot, I said, “What was that all about?”

  May shushed me and mouthed, “Not now.”

  I glanced behind me. Dr. Han was watching us through the glass. I shivered.

  When we went outside, May took hold of my arm and pulled me to the side of the building.

  “What’s going on?” I asked. She looked pale—not at all how she looked earlier.

  “I asked Dr. Han why my blood’s being drawn.” She looked around like someone might be watching us.

  “And?”

  “He said he wanted to test it.”

  “For what?”

  “That’s what I asked, but he wouldn’t say. He got all weird and was trying to change the subject, but then I asked him where my blood was kept.”

  “What’d he say?”

  “First, he froze like I’d said something I shouldn’t have, and I didn’t think he was going to answer, but then he told me that he keeps it safe. And I said, ‘With the Auras’ blood?’ and he said, ‘No. It’s with me. And then I said, ‘Why is it separate from theirs?’ And then guess what he said?”

  I let my brain catch up to everything she’d said before I answered, “What?”

  She took a deep breath, like she was trying to keep calm. “He said it’s safer that way.”

  I thought about it. “What do you think that means?”

  May leaned against the brick building. “I think he knows something bad is coming, but I still don’t think he’s switched sides.”

  I just nodded, thinking. “I’ll talk to Liam about him. Maybe he knows something.” I hoped Dr. Han was on our side.

  “Have you seen Christian today?”

  I shook my head.

  “How did last night go?” May said.

  I told her about the pills and Jackson.

  “What do you think about Jackson? Think he’s switched sides?”

  “It looks that way, but we don’t know for sure. Christian’s going to keep an eye on him.”

  “That sucks. I really liked him—his looks anyway.” She smiled and moved away from the wall.

  * * * * *

  Only three hours into classes and I was getting restless. So far I’d learned about Light’s relationship with water deities, how Light has helped technology, and how an Aura should behave at political dinners. I was ready to fake being sick when Ms. Smitty, the Auran science teacher, began talking about an Aura’s DNA and how it differs from a regular human’s. “If you look at an Aura’s DNA strand,” she said while twirling a pen in her hand, “you’ll see that it’s actually fractured in places, broken some might say. It’s our Light that fills these spaces, making us whole. Now if you’ll turn to page—”

  I raised my hand.

  Ms. Smitty looked at me twice as if she were making sure my hand really was in the air. I had yet to speak in this class. “Yes, Llona?” she said.

  “But what does that mean?”

  “What does what mean?”

  “So Light fills those spaces. What does that mean for us? How does that affect Auras?”

  “It means that you are partly made of Light, white Light to be exact. And what’s neat about that? Anyone?” No one answered, so she continued. “White Light is made up of a spectrum of colors that exhibit the characteristics of a wave, or more specifically, white Light is made up of wavelengths of different colors of light. When white Light passes through a prism, the different colors scatter. Most of you see this when there’s a rainbow in the sky.”

  “Rainbow,” I whispered. Something jogged my memory, and I raised my hand again.

  “What is it, Llona?”

  “You said rainbow, like as in transparent, right?”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “A rainbow. Everyone knows you can’t actually touch a rainbow. Its just sunlight reflecting off the water in the air, like the prism you mentioned. Even though you can see it, it’s transparent, almost invisible, if that makes sense.” I was getting excited as I remembered how Mr. Steele had said my mother had turned invisible. “So is it possible?”

  “For what, Llona?” Ms. Smitty asked, and I could tell by her tone that she was getting sick of me.

  “For an Aura to turn invisible? You know, use her body as a prism and transform the white Light in our DNA, making us transparent.”

  Most of the students burst into laughter, but Ms. Smitty’s expression stayed serious. “What you’re talking about is extremely dangerous.”

  The class quieted down. “So it is possible,” I said.

  “For a highly advanced Aura, and even then I wouldn’t recommend it. You’re talking about splitting your cells. It takes an extreme amount of concentration. Auras have died trying it.”

  “Who told you that?”

  Ms. Smitty crossed her arms to her chest. “Are you questioning me?”

  “No, I really want to know. Who said it would kill you?”

  Ms. Smitty’s face turned red. “I know you’re not familiar with Lucent’s policies, but I can assure you all the teachers here, including myself, are well versed in everything Aura related. Fall in line and trust that we are the experts.” She whipped her long, black braid behind her as she returned to the book on her desk.

  Normally a comment like that would make me explode, but I couldn’t stop thinking about what I’d just learned. My mother had turned invisible. It was possible. Now if only I could figure out how.

  Class ended. As soon as we were out in the hall, Ashlyn bumped me as she walked past. “If you want to disappear,” she said, “we can make that happen.” She tossed her head back and laughed. It was difficult, but I resisted the urge to kick her.

  I headed straight to my room to drop off my books before lunch. The first thing I noticed was how dark the light in my room seemed, but I didn’t have time to ponder on it long.

  “Hey, beautiful,” Christian said. He was lying on my bed, reading Britt’s journal.

  “How’d you get in here?” I asked.

  “Snuck in.” He stood up. “I missed you.”

  I looked at him and waited for the real reason for his visit.

  “What? I did.” He sat up and motioned for me to sit next to him. “And I couldn’t stand being with Jackson any longer. Something’s seriously wrong with him.”

  I dropped my bag next to the bed and sat down. “How so?”

  “He talks like . . . I don’t know. It’s just off. Like he’s better than everyone.”

  I took hold of his hand. “He said the same thing about you.”

  Christian held my gaze. “Do you believe that?”

  “Of course not. Is he telling you anything?”

  “You mean is he spilling the beans on the whole evil plot? Not just yet.” He looked down at the journal. “But it’s not just Jackson. Since I’ve come here, several of the Guardians feel wrong, like they know a secret I don’t. And I feel like they’re watching me.”

  “Maybe they’re trying to decide if they can trust you.”

  “I thought of that. That’s why I tried to get Jackson to do something with me tonight, but he said he was busy. I’m going to follow him and see exactly what he’s up to.”

  “Want some company?” I said, but I secretly hoped he said no. I had my own things to do.

  “That’s okay. You should stay here and hang with the girls. Do something fun. You still remember what that is, don’t you?” He pulled me close.

  I leaned against his shoulder and sighed. Fun? How could I tell him the only fun I had anymore was when I was fighti
ng?

  “Have you talked to Jake lately?” he asked.

  This made me smile. “I tried calling him the other night, but he wasn’t home. He’s really happy with Heidi, living a normal life, in a normal relationship.”

  Christian leaned away from me. “You’ll have a normal life one day and be in a normal relationship too.”

  I looked passed him. “I don’t think so. I have Vyken poison in me. Who knows what that means?”

  “But you’ve been able to fight it so far. Before you know it, it will be gone, and you’ll be you again.” He kissed my cheek.

  I wanted to agree with him, but I knew I would never be “me” again. The darkness had rooted itself inside me, and even though I might learn to control it, it would always be there, just waiting for me to mess up.

  He had to sense it too, deep down, and for the rest of his life he’d probably want to fix me. Christian grabbed the journal off my nightstand and began reading it again.

  I stood up. “I’m going to find May and Kiera in the lunch room,” I said. “Do you want me to bring you back anything?”

  Christian stared at the journal. “That would be great.”

  I waited a second before leaving, watching him and wondering if he’d find what he was looking for. There’s no cure in there, I wanted to say, but he never looked up.

  Because I couldn’t find May and Kiera in the dining room, I walked into the kitchen, ignoring the stares of Lizens, and found Tessa. “How’s it going,” I said.

  She wiped sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand and stacked plates of food up her arms. “Good.”

  “Have you seen May and Kiera?” I picked up the last three plates on the table and followed her into the dining room. Nobody said anything this time.

  “Yeah, they’re eating outside.”

  “Cool. Do you think you can get off or stop working or whatever to eat with us?” When Tessa stopped at a table, I joined her in handing out the plates of food. Both of us ignored the snickering of younger Auras.

  “Maybe. Give me a second. Wait here.” She set the last of the plates down and walked away.

  I backed up against the wall. Across the room I locked eyes with Sophie. She was clearly upset but didn’t say anything. Instead, she forced a smile. I forced one back.