by S. J. McCoy
She stood to give the petite woman, who’d approached their table, a hug.
“You keep saying that, but I’m starting to think you’re avoiding me.”
“I am not. I just haven’t figured out how to get out there and come riding with you yet. I really do want to.” She turned to Laura. “Sorry, Laura. This is Lily Wells; we went to school together, and now Lily’s back here, too, running the riding stables.”
Laura smiled and shook hands. “Nice to meet you. I’ve been wondering about coming out to see you for lessons. I used to ride as a kid back in Texas. I’d love to start again now I’m living here.”
“Anytime you want,” said Lily. “Just give me a call.” She handed Laura her card and then turned back to Renée. “We should see if there aren’t a few more ladies interested and start up a class.”
“That’d be great. I’ll ask around.”
“Hi, ladies.”
Renée smiled at April who was now also standing beside their table. This was turning into quite a gathering!
“Hey, April. Meet Lily. I don’t suppose you have any interest in learning to ride do you?”
April laughed. “Ride horses? You’re asking a girl who grew up on a ranch, remember? I’d love to find somewhere to ride here though.”
Lily smiled and handed her a card. “Then come see me. I run the stables.”
“Great, I will!” That was the first time Renée had seen April look truly enthusiastic about anything since she’d met her.
“Look,” said Laura. “Holly’s here, too. I told her she should join us if she got done with her conference call in time.”
Renée laughed. “The more the merrier.”
Holly came and plonked herself down next to Laura. “Hey, ladies.”
Renée looked around at them all as they chatted. They were all so different and yet they got along well enough. She knew each of them had their own struggles, except maybe Laura, she took everything in her stride and seemed to live a blessed life. Each of the others was going through a tough time in one way or another. She thought about Laura’s friend the life coach, would something like that be of any use to this bunch? She doubted it.
“Well, I need to get back to work,” said Lily. “It was nice meeting all of you. I hope you’ll come out to the stables. And if you don’t, I hope you’ll at least invite me to lunch sometime. It’s good to be back here, but I’m feeling a bit isolated.”
Renée immediately felt bad. She’d been too concerned with her own problems to think about checking whether her old friend was doing okay. “I’m sorry, Lily. I’ll call you. We’ll have lunch soon.”
Lily smiled. “Don’t worry. You don’t need to make it your personal responsibility. It’s just hard being kind of new in town and not having any connections or a network to turn to.”
Renée had to wonder what was going on with Lily that she felt the need for a support network. The Lily she knew wouldn’t ask for help. At least the Lily she had known, but that was a long time ago—they’d all been through so much and changed so much since then.
April nodded. “It would be nice if there were some organization or something to help newcomers find their feet.”
Laura turned and smiled at Renée. Renée knew what she meant. That would be right up her alley, but it could hardly constitute a new career. The town probably had less than a dozen newcomers a year! After Lily had left, she turned to Laura. “So tell me how?”
April and Holly stared at her, not knowing what she was talking about.
Laura shrugged. “I don’t know, but it’s your kind of thing. You just heard from two people at the same time that it’s hard being a newcomer around here.” She turned to the others. “We’re trying to come up with something Renée can do that will satisfy her need to be a useful member of society—and make her a living.”
Holly rested her chin on her hands. “I’d say there are enough women with problems around here that you could probably set up a women’s center.”
April nodded. “I’d have to agree with that. I was talking about being new, but…” she looked around at them. “There are other issues I need to deal with, and I have no clue where to turn for help or advice.”
Renée nodded. “You’ve probably got a point, but something like that would normally be funded by the town or the county. Helping people tends to take money, not make money. It’s a cool idea, but I think it would have to be a part-time, volunteer situation. Not a career move.”
Laura chewed her bottom lip. “Maybe, maybe not. You’d have to see what other angles there might be. If you can help women back into the workforce, or help with…I don’t know what. Then you might get local businesses interested in funding it.”
“I doubt it.”
Holly grinned at her. “Well, hell girl. Isn’t your man going to be in charge of the town’s budget? Surely he could help you set something up. I mean damn, he already bought you that gorgeous house over at Four Mile; I’m sure he’d do whatever he can to help you.”
Renée’s heart pounded to a halt. Gabe had bought the house? And Holly thought that he’d just allocate town funds to allow her to do what she wanted? She didn’t know which of those made her feel more nauseous. She hadn’t even considered applying for local funding for anything, because of the shadow Eric’s crime cast on her. No way did she want to cast that shadow onto Gabe, create any doubt that he was using town funds improperly.
She couldn’t think straight, could hardly breathe. She checked her watch and stood. “I’m sorry. I’ve got to go.” She made her way blindly across the deck and then ran across the square back to her car. Gabe’s car! She corrected herself as she unlocked it.
Chapter Twenty
Gabe sat in the car for a long moment when he got home. He wanted to talk to Renée about the possibilities Gramps had raised with him earlier, but he just didn’t know how. He should probably talk to her about the house over at Four Mile, too. He wasn’t hiding it from her—it was just that the right moment hadn’t come up yet.
He got out of the car when he saw her come out the front door and stand on the porch. Something was wrong. Very wrong, by the look on her face. She didn’t say anything, just watched him climb the steps. She looked as though she’d been crying.
“What’s wrong?”
She shook her head, sadly. “What’s right, Gabe?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it work here.”
He felt as though he’d been punched in the stomach. “Why? What’s going on?”
“All I know how to do, all I really want to do is charity work. I’m not going to be able to do that in this town.”
“Why not?”
“Because it would involve public funding, which would in some way involve you. I have no intention of casting any shadows on you. If you allocate funds to anything I’m in charge of it’d raise questions, and rightfully so.”
Gabe’s mind was racing. She had a point, but it wasn’t really a valid one. No one here believed she’d had anything to do with Eric’s crime. Everyone in Summer Lake who knew her—which was most of the town—knew her character and knew her intentions. “Renée, you’re talking about a small town, where people know you, like you, and trust you. I think it’s time you accept that it’s not the same here. What’s got you like this? Has someone said something?”
She took a deep breath and met his gaze. “Actually, yes. Holly mentioned that if I wanted to get funding for a Women’s Center it would be easy. Since you’re in control of the town’s budget and…”
“And what?”
“And apparently you already bought that house at Four Mile for me! People think you’re happy to spend for whatever I want—whether it’s your money or the town’s. I can’t live with that. And by the way? I hope you’ll be very happy in your new home!” She turned and went back inside, slamming the door behind her.
“Renée!” He strode after her. “Maybe I should have to
ld you I bought the house, but I wanted it either way. If at some point you decide you want to live there, great. If you don’t, we have an investment property. Be fair. We’re taking the time so you can figure out what you want to do. I don’t see why I should have to refrain from doing the things I want to do in the meantime. I’d been considering buying a house out there since I first heard about the development. It had nothing to do with you.”
She turned and glared at him. “You’re right. It has nothing at all to do with me.”
He shook his head and walked toward her. She was hurt and angry and frustrated—all with good reason. He held his arms out to her. “I love you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I was worried about how you might react.” He stepped closer, wanting to hold her, to calm her down so they could work things out together. She continued to glare at him. He closed his arms around her and held her to his chest. For a moment she was rigid, unyielding.
“I’m sorry.”
That made her relax. “I’m sorry, too, Gabe.” She rested her head against his chest and tightened her arms around his waist. “I’m really, really sorry. I love you, but I need you to leave.”
It took him a couple of seconds to process the words. She couldn’t mean them? She stepped away from him with tears rolling down her cheeks. “Please, just go.”
“No! Renée, that’s crazy. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Yes, you are. I want you to leave. We’re not going to work out Gabe; we may as well face it now. You go live in your new house, start your new job and your new life. I’m not going to be part of it.” She turned and went into the bedroom.
Gabe was stunned. He shook his head to clear it, then started after her. She’d locked the door! “Renée!”
“Go away, Gabe!”
Damn, she was stubborn! “Let me in, and let’s talk about it.”
“No.”
He let out an exasperated sigh. “Fair enough!” He wasn’t going to stand here begging her to talk to him. It was pointless and he knew it. He’d wait until she calmed down. Right now she was upset, upset about him buying the house. He should have told her before someone else did, he’d give her that. On top of her frustration about what she might do for a career, it was just too much. He’d give her a chance to cool off, then call her later. Maybe she’d even call him—he could hope.
~ ~ ~
Renée listened to the car pull away with tears streaming down her face. What had she done? She blew her nose. The only thing she could do. She wasn’t going to let Gabe risk his reputation or his job by funding a project that she was responsible for. And she wasn’t going to go and live in that house with him. This was her home. She looked around and a fresh wave of tears came. She shook her head sadly. She was in a no-win situation. She loved Gabe, but she couldn’t just give up everything she was to be with him. And she couldn’t allow him to risk his own career so that she could have hers.
~ ~ ~
Gabe pulled into the square at the resort. She couldn’t mean it. He could understand her being pissed at hearing from someone else about him buying the house at Four Mile. He could understand her frustration about not wanting to apply for funding because of any doubts it might cast on him. But, damn! He couldn’t understand that she didn’t want to be with him anymore. That she thought they weren’t going to work out.
He got out of the Range Rover and headed for the bar. He needed a drink. Once he was settled at the bar, he sent her a text.
Please call me when you’ve calmed down.
He stared at his phone for a few moments, then put it away as Kenzie approached.
“Hi. Where’s Renée?”
He didn’t want to get into explaining what was going on. “She’s at home.” It was true.
Kenzie made a face at him. “Did you leave your smile at home, too?”
Gabe nodded. He hardly felt like smiling right now.
“Oookay. What can I get you?”
“Bourbon.”
He watched as she turned away to fix his drink. His mind was racing. He was a problem solver, but he had no idea how he could solve Renée’s problems. Well, that wasn’t true. He could solve them no problem, if she’d let him. She wanted to start a Women’s Center? He could set that up for her. He could lease her a space and let her do her thing. No public funds needed. He could support her, too, if she’d let him. But she wouldn’t, and he did understand why. He understood, but it frustrated the hell out of him. He checked his phone again. Still no reply from her. Did she really expect him to go spend the night at Four Mile?
Kenzie put his drink in front of him with a smile. “Want to talk about it?”
He shook his head.
She frowned. “Is Renée all right?”
Gabe met her gaze. “She’s pissed at me.”
“And you’re going to fix that by sitting here drinking bourbon?”
“Stay out of it, Kenzie. She doesn’t want to talk to me right now, so I’m giving her some space.”
Kenzie put her hands on her hips and scowled at him. Ben appeared behind her and tapped her on the shoulder. “Why don’t you go take a break?”
She turned the scowl on him then back at Gabe.
Gabe shrugged.
Ben laughed. “Go on. I’ll take care of things here.”
Kenzie pushed her way out of the bar, shooting Gabe an evil look as she went.
Gabe rolled his eyes at Ben. “I’m the one in the doghouse, but you can bet Kenzie isn’t going to listen to my side.”
Ben nodded. “Women stick together.”
“So I noticed.”
“Want to talk about it?”
Gabe shrugged. “I don’t see that it’d do any good.”
Ben smiled. “Try me. I’ve been known to help solve a problem or two. What’s going on?”
Gabe downed his bourbon and pushed his glass forward for a refill. “You know I bought the house at Four Mile?”
“Yeah, Pete mentioned it.”
“Well, Holly mentioned it to Renée before I had a chance to.”
“Ah. And she’s not happy about it?”
“Nope. She wants to stay in her own place, and she thinks I bought this one behind her back.”
“Well, didn’t you?”
“No! It wasn’t like that. I’ve been thinking about buying out there for a while. It’s a good investment. Am I supposed to stop doing the things I would do just because I’m with Renée?”
“No, but it might not be a bad idea to tell her about them, especially when your motives are open to interpretation.”
“What does that mean?”
Ben smiled. “You’ve been living out at her place, you don’t like it.” He held a hand up. “And I understand why. But she wants to stay there. It’s a fair assumption that you buying another house is an indication that you want to live in it. Don’t you think?”
Gabe nodded. “She sure as hell thinks so. She told me to go live in it and be very happy there.”
“Ah.”
“Yeah. Ah! I would be very happy in it if she’d move there with me, but she won’t hear of it. She’s in a tough situation.” He sighed. “And now I think about it, I’m her biggest problem.”
“How’s that?”
“Well, she wants to live in her house—for now at least. Her only problem with that is she knows I hate it. And she came up with the idea of starting a Women’s Center, which would be right up her street, but she feels she can’t apply for funding because of me.”
Ben stared at him for a moment and then moved down the bar to serve a couple who had just arrived. When he returned, he held Gabe’s gaze. “She is in a tough spot, isn’t she?”
Gabe blew out a sigh. “She doesn’t have to be though, she’s just stubborn. No one around here would question her trustworthiness or my motivation.”
“Come on, Gabe, that’s not fair. You’re right, as things stand at the moment, there would be no questions or doubts at all, but the minute someone has an axe to grind against you, you’
d be laid wide open. She’s trying to protect you from that possibility. I’m surprised you can’t see it.”
“Hmm.” If Gabe cared to admit it, he knew Ben was right, and it wasn’t that he didn’t see it, so much as he refused to think about it. “So what am I supposed to do? I’d stand down if I thought it’d help her, but I know she wouldn’t go for it. I’d love to live in the new house, but not without her. At the same time, I couldn’t live at her place for much longer anyway. It’s driving me insane.”
Ben pursed his lips. “Let me think about it.”
“Well if you can come up with a solution, I’d love to hear it.”
Ben smiled. “There’s got to be a way to figure out something that will work for both of you.”
“I’d like to think so, but, if there is, I’m not seeing it.”
“That’s because you’re too close. I have an outsider’s perspective, which is usually more rational.”
Gabe sighed. “Yeah. Thanks, Ben.” He checked his phone again. Still nothing. “I guess for now I’m going to head out to Four Mile.”
Ben nodded. “Give her some time to calm down. It’ll all work out.”
“I hope so.”
~ ~ ~
Renée picked her phone up then set it down again. She wanted to call Gabe and ask him to come home. But part of her didn’t. The longer she thought about it, the more she doubted their future. She was happy for him that he had his new job, but while he was working it, she wouldn’t be able to do the kind of work she loved in Summer Lake. She understood his need to buy the house out at Four Mile, but while he was living there they weren’t going to be together. This was her home. She also understood that it wasn’t fair to ask him to live here. She shook her head. As good as they were together, there were so many conflicting aspects of their circumstances that made a shared future seem impossible.
She took herself outside to sit on the front porch. She and Gabe had sat out here so many times these last few weeks. It felt strange to sit out here without him. More than strange, it felt wrong. She didn’t want to be here without him. She heaved a big sigh. What the hell was she going to do? Staring out at the lake, leaving seemed to be the only solution. She didn’t want to be here without him, but she didn’t want to be here with him if it meant one of them had to give up who they were in order to be together.