Her Last Letter

by Nancy C. Johnson

  “I’ll let you know.”

  She nodded. “I’ll have another report for you fairly soon.”

  “Good.” I rose from the couch. “I think I’ll stay here for a while longer, review some of this. Caroline won’t mind.”

  “Sure.”

  I walked her to the door.

  It was two hours before I called Caroline. I’d gone through the videotapes, fast-forwarding through sections of them, then skimming the emails and listening to bits of conversation on the audiotapes. Sue was right. I’d be busy for a while.

  “Hey, Care.”

  “God, I thought you’d never call. My stomach’s been doing flip-flops for hours. So?”

  “Come pick me up. We’ll go for a drive in the mountains, to our usual spot. I’ll tell you on the way.”

  “Be there in five minutes. Oh, wait … I have to stop for gas.”

  “Don’t bother. We’ll take the Jeep.”

  When she pulled in, I ran downstairs with the shopping bag.

  “What’s that?” she asked as I approached.

  “Everything. You drive.”

  I handed her the keys and we hopped in.

  “So how bad is it?” she asked.

  “Pretty bad.”

  “Is he … cheating?”

  “Looks like it.”

  “Oh, man.” Caroline shook her head sadly, then reached over and touched my hand. “I’m so sorry, Gwyn. I swear. I never would have believed it.”

  “Sue didn’t catch him in the actual act. From the looks of it, he stopped seeing Sylvia recently, maybe for his own reasons, or maybe because he thinks I might check up on him. That’s what Sue thinks. It all looks pretty suspicious.”

  “So what are you going to do?”

  “I don’t know. I want you to look at the tape. Maybe I’m wrong. I hope I’m wrong.”

  “As soon as we get back.”

  “Can I leave this stuff with you?” I pointed to the shopping bag. “I can’t take it home, and I want to study it some more.”

  “Of course. And I promise I won’t look at it unless you’re there.”

  “Doesn’t matter. You might as well. You might see something I missed.”

  “What about Craig?” she asked. “Did Sue find out anything about him?”

  “Yes. He’s been spotted here in Glenwood. She thinks they’ll grab him if he sticks around.”

  Caroline’s eyes opened wide. “God, what if Craig was the one in your old house? I’ll bet it was him. I mean, it makes sense. It would be easy enough for him to figure out the place is empty. All he’d have to do is drive by a few times. Probably thought it’d be a good place to hide out.”

  “Yes.”

  “But why is he back? He must want something.” She turned quickly to me. “And that’s another good reason for you to stay far away from there.”

  We wound our way up the mountain and parked in the woods alongside the road, our spot, a stretch of dirt road we hiked often. I quickly filled Caroline in on Wolfgang.

  “What?” she said. “This gets worse and worse. How could Linda stay with that bastard?” She shook her head, then stared out the windshield. “God, Wolfgang could be the one Kelly was talking about in her letter. Craig might be innocent. Maybe he only ran because he knew no one would believe him. Maybe he came back to look for proof to clear himself.”

  “It’s possible. Hey, Care, do you ever remember Kelly talking about someone with the initials, T.D.?”

  “T.D.? No, why?”

  “Oh, I read something in one of her journals. It just got me thinking. Maybe there’s a connection somehow.”

  “Did she write anything about Wolfgang?”

  “Not that I saw, but some of her journals, the most recent ones, are missing.”

  “Who took them?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Caroline drew a sharp intake of air. “Wolfgang. Or Craig. Yeah. Maybe he knew about Kelly’s journals. The guy practically lived with her. Maybe he thought he’d find some answers in them. Maybe he did.” She looked over at me. “Maybe he’s filling in the puzzle pieces before he goes to the police.”

  We drove back to Caroline’s apartment and she viewed the video scene between Trevor and Sylvia.

  “God, she’s such a bitch,” was the first thing out of Care’s mouth. “How could Trevor even like her?”

  “Maybe he likes the sex.”

  “This tape doesn’t really prove anything. It looks bad, but it doesn’t prove that Trevor’s nailing her.”

  “It’s okay, Care. Don’t try to defend him. I know how it looks.”

  I handed over a few of the emails.

  She read one aloud, mimicking Sylvia’s syrupy sing-song voice. “I can’t wait to see you today, baby. Let’s go to our favorite restaurant. I want to be alone with you. I miss you. I can’t keep my mind on my work. Meet me at twelve-thirty. Don’t be late.”

  “And this is Trevor’s reply,” she said. “Don’t wait for me. My meeting with Larry could run long. I’ll try to make it, but I’ll let you know.”

  Care looked over to me. “This does not sound like a man in the throes of a love like none he’s ever known. He’s barely civil to her.” She read a few more emails, then gazed up. “And it looks like all these are like this. Trevor is short with her, doesn’t say anything even remotely romantic. He’s almost rude.”

  “Yes, it could be over. I agree. But the point is …was he having an affair with her? Even if Trevor only used Sylvia to cement this condo project, or slept with her out of sexual curiosity, or just wanted to feel up her great tits, it doesn’t matter. If he fucked her, we’re through.”

  “Yeah.”

  We flipped through some of the photographs, Trevor and Sylvia at lunch, she leaning in, whispering something into his ear. Trevor and Sylvia outside the restaurant, Trevor’s hand behind her back, helping her across the street. It was an intimate gesture, but one that could also be viewed as polite, depending on what you wanted to see. I’d seen Trevor do the same type of thing with his mother. One of the many photograhs that could easily be misinterpreted. Like Sue said.

  I showed Caroline the tape of the fight between Linda and Wolfgang. It started as a shouting match, then escalated to Wolfgang making a grab for her, then Linda sprinting to the bedroom where she locked herself inside and threatened to call the police.

  “If you touch me, I’ll do it,” she screamed. “And if you ever fucking hit me again, I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you, you fucking lunatic. You stay away from me, you piece of shit.” Then Linda started crying, and Wolfgang stalked out of the house, first hurling a lamp against the wall on his way. I heard a car engine starting, then a screech of tires as he took off. The tape skipped forward, showing Linda cautiously exiting the bedroom, then peeking outside to the drive, then also leaving the house in her car. The tape skipped forward again, showing Wolfgang’s return hours later, then a call to Linda on his cell, apologizing, begging her to come back, crying himself, promising not to ever, ever hurt her again, that he was sorry, sorry, so sorry….

  Later on, after I left Caroline’s, I called Linda. She was working out with Wolfgang in their private gym. She couldn’t have sounded happier.

  Chapter 22

  Trevor wasn’t home when I returned from Caroline’s, and that was good. I had no idea how I was going to hide the way I was feeling right now. According to his message on my cell, he’d be home on time tonight, by six. But I was ready for a last minute excuse. If he did call, I’d act the part of gullible wife, say I understood the delay, then hope Sue would finally get the goods on film and put an end to any remaining doubts.

  Annabelle met me at the door, my faithful Annabelle. I stooped to pet her, then brought from the closet the warm wool holiday coat I’d bought for her, red with tiny gold jingle bells attached. She squirmed as I snapped her in, but her tail was wagging, knowing we’d be taking our usual walk around the neighborhood.

  Lights were coming on in the houses, and I w
as able to see Christmas trees shimmering in the windows, and reindeer posed mid-prance in the yards. Usually it made me smile. Now I felt dead.

  Annabelle stopped to nose around a bush, preparing to provide extra fertilizer. I’d been going over and over what Craig had told me, what Kelly had written, trying to pull this stubborn rabbit out of the hat. Kelly had left clues for us to find, hidden in a nook here, a cranny there, just in case her worst fears were realized. How I wished she could speak to me now, tell me what I needed to know.

  I looked up to the heavens, at the slate gray sky and scudding clouds overhead. I’d been feeling her presence more and more these last few days, drifting at the edge of my thoughts. Perhaps she was trying to lead me to the truth, set my feet in the right direction, if only I would listen.

  Oh, Kelly, please help me. I miss you so. Are you somewhere up there, baby? Looking down on me now? What is it you want me to know? I’m listening. I’m here, and I’m listening. You can tell me, whatever it is. No matter what happened back then, don’t worry. I love you and I forgive you. I forgave you a long time ago....

  I fell asleep on the couch after the walk, Annabelle near me, curled against my stomach. I didn’t wake until the headlights of Trevor’s Cadillac flashed alongside the house as he pulled up the drive. I wiped the sleep from my eyes and stumbled to the kitchen. The clock read six-fifteen.

  I heard Trevor’s footsteps cross the tile floor, then he called out my name, coming up behind me as I stood at the counter. Frigid cold wafted off his clothes. He hugged me, and I shivered.

  “How’s my Gwyn?” he said, kissing me on the back of the head. “I’m home on time. Did you notice? Just like I said I would be.”

  “Guess I didn’t believe you. I don’t have anything planned for dinner.” I shrugged away from him.

  “I’m not hungry, not right now. Maybe we can order a pizza. Or go out.”

  “Maybe.”

  He pulled me around to face him, his eyes large and dark like liquid black buttons. It was then that it hit me, like an electric shock. What Kelly had meant by the initials T.D. “Oh,” I said, my heart revving so fast I could barely think.

  “What?”

  “I just remembered … something. I was supposed to call Caroline. She asked me to call … about…. I don’t know. I’d better go call her.”

  “Sure.” He seemed slightly confused.

  I felt him watching as I bypassed the kitchen phone and fled down the hall to my studio.

  Oh, please be home, Caroline, please.

  “Hey,” she said, “what’s up?”

  “I need a favor. Can you meet me at the old house-right now? I don’t want to go there alone and I left some wallpaper samples I need. I’d go by myself, but you said-”

  “What’s going on? Is something wrong? Is Trevor there?”

  “Yes.”

  “Sure, I can meet you. Nate’s here too. We’ll both go. But wait a few minutes before you leave. Give us time to check out the house.”

  “Trevor,” I yelled as I ran back down the hall and grabbed my coat. “I’m going over to Care’s. She wants to show me something. I won’t be long. Do you want me to stop for pizza on the way home?”

  He came up behind me as I was about to escape through the side door. “You’re leaving? But I just got home. What’s the big rush?”

  “I don’t know. It’s Care. She’s excited. She wants me to see something she bought. I won’t be long. I’ll get the pizza.”

  “Don’t bother. We can get it later.”

  Nate’s squad car was parked in the drive when I pulled up. Caroline sat alone in the passenger seat. She waved me over. A few seconds later, Nate, carrying a big flashlight, emerged from around the back of the house. He gave the two of us a nod and we followed him inside.

  I walked directly to the kitchen and scooped the bag of samples off the kitchen table.

  “So, is that everything?” Caroline asked.

  “No, just one more thing.” I headed for the basement, flipping on the light at the top of the stairs as I started down.

  “Wait,” she said. “Wait for us.”

  I began searching through the cardboard boxes containing Kelly’s belongings, tearing the boxes open and pulling stuff out.

  “What are you looking for?” Care asked.

  “I want to find a teddy bear we used to have. I need it for a painting I’m doing, kind of a Christmas thing.”

  “A teddy bear? Couldn’t you just buy another one?”

  “No, this one is special.”

  Caroline helped me rummage through the boxes, and then Nate.

  “How big is it?” Care asked. “Little or medium sized?”

  “Kind of medium,” I said. “Like this.” I pulled it out.

  It reminded me of a teddy bear corpse, sealed in plastic as it was. I unzipped the bag and reached inside, relieved to find the old bear dry and unharmed. I stared into its round black button eyes. “We can leave now.”

  When they’d turned their backs and started for the stairs, I pressed on the bear’s stomach, and thought I felt something.

  We met at the top and Caroline gave me an odd look, knitting her brows. “Are you not telling me something? You seem awfully nervous.”

  I shook my head. “Can’t talk about it now.”

  I thanked them both for helping me out, then hurried home. I left the bear outside in the Jeep. I’d finish my examination of it once Trevor wasn’t around.

  He was standing in the kitchen when I walked in, a frown on his face.

  “Were you expecting something?” He took an approximately eight-inch square package wrapped in newspaper off the table. “I found this on the front porch. Someone knocked on the door just before you drove in.”

  “Who was it?”

  “I don’t know. They didn’t stay.”

  “Is there a label on it?”

  “No-no label. Think we should open it?”

  “As long as it isn’t some kind of letter bomb.” Then a thought struck me and I reached for the package. “Let me see it.” He handed it over. It felt slightly heavy. “Maybe we should wait,” I said. “Could be a surprise Christmas present or something. Maybe Caroline brought it over.”

  “Caroline? Why would she do that?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “I think we should open it now, find out for sure.”

  He wasn’t going to budge. There was no way to avoid this.

  I slowly tore away the paper. Eventually, a black lacquered jewelry box appeared, one I recognized immediately.

  “Well, I was right,” I said. “It is from Caroline. I saw this in town and looks like she decided to buy it for me. I’ll have to call and thank her.”

  “Why would she drive over and just dump it on the porch? Especially since you just saw her.”

  “I don’t know. Maybe she wanted to surprise me.”

  “Yes … maybe.” He eyed me, then turned his back and headed through the foyer toward the living room.

  Quickly, I carried the box out of the kitchen and down the hall toward my studio. I entered, holding onto Kelly’s old jewelry box tightly, a box I hadn’t seen since she died. Hands shaking, I undid the small latch and lifted the lid.

  Inside was a note, and below it a cylindrical metal canister used for film. I opened the note.

  This is what he was looking for. Watch out! I’ll contact you soon. I have something else. Could be proof if I’m right.

  I heard Trevor approaching and hid the note and film container behind my back, then realized how suspicious that looked, and chucked them both onto a nearby table. The canister rolled until it found the edge of the table and dropped to the floor.

  “So did you call her?” Trevor stood in the doorway.

  I stared down at the jewelry box I still held in one hand, aware that my face was reddening despite willing myself to be calm. “No, I’ll call and thank her tomorrow.”

  “Won’t she want to know that you got it okay?”

>   “She won’t care.”

  “I think you should call her. Why wait to thank her? I might want to thank her too.”

  “All right. If it will make you happy, I’ll call.” I dialed Caroline’s number at home, but she didn’t answer, and I was not about to leave a message. If she called back, Trevor might get to the phone before I could. “Not home,” I said, hanging up.

  “Probably left for work,” he said, “or went out with Nate.”

  “Yes, probably.”

  He stood there quietly. “Why don’t you tell me who really gave you that jewelry box?”

  “I did tell you.”

  “Josh gave it to you, didn’t he?”

  For a moment, I was struck dumb.

  “Why don’t you tell me the truth? Are you seeing him again?”

  “No, Trevor. I’m not.”

  “Then where did the box come from?”

  “I told you. Caroline.”

  “Look at you. Your face is red all the way down past your neck. You’re not a very good liar, Gwyn.” He turned to leave, then an instant later popped back in the doorway. “You met him just now, didn’t you? Did he forget to give you a present? You know, if you really want that weird son of a bitch instead of me, don’t worry. I won’t fight you. I’m sick of it all.” He smacked the doorjamb with the butt of his hand, then stalked off.

  For a moment, I was tempted to go after him, then remembered the film canister down on the floor. I dropped to my knees, still watching for him to make another appearance, then felt under the table for the container. I grabbed it from behind a table leg, scrambled up, and hid it behind a cup of sketching pencils. I took the note and placed it beneath a magazine.

  I waited, listening, but couldn’t tell from the relative silence where Trevor might be in the house. Deciding to chance it, I grabbed the can from off the table and ran for the hall bathroom.

  But Trevor appeared suddenly from around a corner, blocking the hallway. “Are you really going to try and deny it?”

  “Yes-I am. Excuse me, please.” I pushed past him to the bathroom and locked the door behind me. Taking a few quick breaths, I screwed off the cap and shook out the contents. It was developed film, two strips of five frames. Not much. Maybe Craig had kept the remainder of it.