My Weakness

by Alison Mello

  I closed my eyes for a moment, thinking of the look Toby gets when he is happy. That wide eyed, open mouth expression. His arms moving up and down as if he’s trying to fly away followed by that screeching squeal of delight. Though some might find it too much to handle, I thought it was one of the very best sounds in the world. It meant he’d been reached, that place deep down within him had been found and that uncontrollable excitement had taken over.

  My heart ached, so deep, and I loved it.

  “I love you for doing this for him,” I said as I opened my eyes. I found he was looking back at me, with a look of awe on his face. “I love you for being the man you are, and for loving my family as much as I love them.”

  Before he could reply, I leaned in once more and pressed my lips to his.

  No amount of thanks could ever touch the depth of what he’d done. Not only for Toby, but for my parents too. There was absolutely no way to explain just what his actions meant to me.

  Epilogue

  2 Weeks later

  Xavier

  I tried to keep a straight face, but the idiots sharing a table with me were making it almost impossible.

  Here I sat in a booth at Porter’s pizza, surrounded by Isaac, Red, and Corbin. We’d just been led to a booth by a girl that Red couldn't seem to take his eyes off. She was a petite little thing, and the thought of the two of them together was odd to picture. I think one of his thighs was as big as her waist alone. She was quiet, timid maybe, and she kept averting her eyes toward the floor each time one of these jackasses made some type of crude remark.

  Not necessarily toward her, but in general they just had no filter. Normally Red was the same way, but today it was like he was mute. Shit like that was like seeing a fucking unicorn—very rare.

  “You okay, Red?” I asked and he only nodded his head.

  Over the last couple of months the guy had started to let his hair grow out. It no longer bushed out like a crazy afro but hung more past his ears. Most days he pulled it back and had this crazy ass fucking ponytail on the back of his head. I had also noticed the color seemed less red, more of a brownish tint now ran throughout. At times I wanted to ask him if he’d been dyeing it, but left it alone.

  The guy was a monster, tall and built. Now it would seem he was heavily intrigued by the sweet girl who couldn’t make eye contact with him. Her cheeks reddened as she took our drink orders. When she reached Red, she lifted her hand and tucked her hair behind her ear, peering up at him, as she smiled politely. “What would you like to drink?” Her voice cracked.

  “Why you so nervous?” he asked, and each one of us at the table stopped talking to hear her reply. Actually, I thought it was more to watch Red flirt, because again, the guy was a mystery. He never really displayed his personal shit for the rest of us to see.

  “This is my first day,” she said in explanation as she looked back over her shoulder. Each of us followed her movements and I noticed Pete standing back near the kitchen entrance watching us all closely.

  I lifted my hand, offering a wave and he nodded his head. The guy still kept his distance from me, which I found odd. It wasn’t like I threatened to beat his ass or anything for crushing on my girl. I just made sure he understood that she and I were together.

  I thought I did it in a calm fashion.

  If you asked Morgan, though, I thought she would disagree.

  “Well, I think you’re doing just fine,” Red assured her. “The fact that you’re gorgeous is a huge bonus.”

  Her cheeks reddened further, and Isaac, who sat next to Red, looked back and forth between the two, his mouth hanging open in a bit of shock. He looked ridiculous as his head continued to whip from Red to the girl and then back to Red.

  “Thank you.” It came out in almost a whisper. “Did you want anything to drink?” she asked again as she tucked her chin toward her chest, an attempt to hide the fact that she was blushing was my guess.

  “Are you boys harassing the new girl?” I looked to my right just as Morgan stepped up to the table. She leaned her hip toward me, and I wrapped my arm around her waist.

  “Not at all,” I assured her, “but Red seems smitten.”

  “I’ll take a Coke,” Red said in a rush, just before the girl hurried off without another word.

  “Asshole,” he mumbled as he sat back in his seat, still watching the girl walk away.

  “She is entirely too innocent for the likes of any of you,” Morgan said with a smirk. “Her head would spin after five seconds. Poor girl would crack.”

  “I’d mend her,” Red said, and I’m not sure he meant for any of us to hear. When I looked back at Morgan, she too gave him a questionable stare. She visibly shook her head as if to clear her thoughts.

  “So are you boys hungry?” she asked and I allowed my hand to slip just a little lower on her waist, cupping her ass in my palm.

  “Starving,” I assured her when she looked at me with her eyebrow cocked.

  “Pervert,” she added, but her eyes couldn’t hide that she liked my perverted behavior.

  Since the night she found me asleep next to Toby in his newly decorated room, things had shifted for us. The newness of our relationship was still there, but we now had this comfortable manner that surrounded our time together. A playfulness mixed with an undeniable passion. It was something I had never felt before.

  I loved this woman, more than I had ever imagined being able to love one person. She was it, the one for me. The thought of not having her in my life was something I couldn’t ever face.

  Just last weekend, after Edmond and Kathy insisted on thanking my parents, we drove to Kissimmee together. We spent the entire day cooking out and swimming. It was another ultimate step in the relationship between Morgan and me.

  Morgan took our orders and moved off toward the kitchen, and once again I noticed Pete lingering in the dining room. He never came on our side, but he did continue to look toward us on occasion.

  “I’ll be right back,” I told the guys, but none of them seemed to care that I got up from the booth. They each continued to harass one another as their loud voices carried throughout the restaurant.

  “Hey Pete,” I said as I stepped up to his side.

  His shoulders instantly stiffened as he stood tall and turned his body to face me. “Hi,” he said, looking up over my shoulder. “Is everything okay?”

  Why did he seem so nervous?

  “It’s great, actually,” I assured him, hoping to ease some of the tension rolling off this guy.

  “I actually just wanted to thank you for being so good to Morgan.” His eyes widened in surprise. “She loves this job and her last boss wasn’t the greatest kind of guy. From what she tells me, you treat her with respect and in turn she also respects you. That moves you pretty high up on my list.”

  He offered me a nod and a simple thanks. Still, I thought the guy viewed me as competition.

  “Is everything okay over here?” I turned around to find Morgan standing behind me, with a worried look on her face.

  “Everything is great,” I told her as I spun around to look at Pete once again. “I was telling Pete here that I think he’s a decent guy.” I reached my hand out toward him, and he hesitantly placed his in mine, offering a firm shake.

  I played nice and made the effort to make things peaceful between him and me; the ball was now in his court. But he needed to get used to me because I wasn’t going anywhere. Morgan was my girl, and she always would be. That was just the way things were.

  ***

  Morgan

  “Hey Marc,” Xavier said as he leaned back in the kitchen chair, his arms stretched out as he ran his palm over the tabletop. The biggest shit-eating grin covered his mouth. “Where’d you buy this table anyway?”

  I narrowed my eyes at him, knowing exactly what he had up his sleeve.

  “Why?” he asked as he peeked back over his shoulder at me before returning back to Xavier.

  “Because I have this deep connection to it
,” Xavier replied, his grin growing wider. “It’s this unexplainable liking, I guess, that I can’t explain.”

  I knew at this point my eyes had to appear the size of saucers. I hid behind Marcus, shaking my head at Xavier. He needed to stop, like now. The last thing I wanted was for Marcus to know just what we had done on his table. Only my evil stare did absolutely nothing to stop him.

  “You have a liking for my table?” Marcus asked, not sounding convinced. Actually, the skepticism in his voice outweighed any other reaction.

  “Yes.” Xavier once again allowed his palm to glide over the top surface. “It’s sturdy, built solid,” he gripped it and shook it a little, “like it could easily hold the weight of two people.”

  I fisted my hands and shook my arms around, trying to indicate my growing irritation.

  Marcus turned around so quickly I didn't have time to hide my fleeing arms, as I still tried to stop Xavier from his continuous taunting. I was instantly caught in the act as he gave me a confused look. I tried to play it off as if I was swatting a bug away, but I knew I’d failed. I was busted as reality hit Marcus head on.

  A look I could only describe as horror washed over his face. “No,” he gasped. Spinning back around, he looked at Xavier and did this little stomp with his foot. “Hell no,” he added.

  I felt my stomach drop, as if it hit the floor at my feet.

  Why?

  Why would Xavier even bring it up?

  “Oh yes,” Xavier said, and I immediately hung my head to hide the instant blush that filled my neck and face.

  Marcus looked between Xavier and me as I peeked up through the hair that had fallen to cover my face. He wrinkled his nose as his gaze fell toward the table. “I loved that table too,” he said sadly, “until you two decided to fornicate on it.”

  I pressed my lips tightly together and did my best not to laugh out loud at Marcus’ reaction.

  He walked off looking like he’d just been told that pedicures were made illegal and would no longer be offered to the public. Xavier, of course, chuckled, and I reached behind me, grabbed the loaf of bread, and heaved it at his head. It bounced off his forehead and landed on the table before him.

  The asshole looked up at me a gleam in his eye. “Lunch is served,” he said, slapping the table top. “Hop on up here, babe, I’m hungry.”

  Arrogant, adorable, cute man I’d love to throttle, I thought as I too stormed out of the kitchen after my best friend to soothe his broken heart.

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  About the Author

  C.A. Harms is like any other addicted reader. She enjoys happy endings and HEA love stories. She hasn’t always been a lover of Romance and had once been addicted to a good Mystery. Just recently she has taken on a new liking and now is a full blown Romance novel addict.

  She lives in Illinois and enjoys spending time with her husband of 14 years and two children. You will always find her with her kindle or paperback in hand as it is her favorite pass time.

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  I think of you. I just can’t talk to you right now.

  I miss you. I just can’t admit it right now.

  I need you. I just can’t show you right now.

  I love you. I just can’t tell you right now.

  ~Unknown~

  Prologue

  Kara

  I knew better. I could look but I couldn’t touch. That didn’t stop me from daydreaming about how it would feel to be in his arms. Would his embrace be as strong as it looked? From the look of the muscles I’ve spent hours, weeks, months admiring, I’d say so. Just looking at him made me feel all tingly inside. I had no right to feel that way. I like to think of myself as a good person, I have better morals than to covet somebody else’s man. But from the first time I laid eyes on him, I couldn’t help myself. Of course I knew he was taken, but that didn’t stop my mind from wandering to places it had no right to go. If this was how it felt before they got married, god alone knew how it was going to feel after. I was used to seeing him a few times a week when he came by the house to see her, but when they got married, he’d be living with us until they could afford a place of their own. Houses weren’t easy to come by for first time buyers fresh out of college without a trust-fund from some rich parents or an inheritance of some kind, so he’d move in with us and I’d have to see him every day. Not that I minded the idea of seeing him that often, I just didn’t want it to be her he was looking at with those sinful green eyes. I didn’t want it to be her bed he was in every night while I lay alone in mine, dreaming of what it would be like to kiss those full lips, to be touched by those calloused hands…talk about messed up. I needed to find a cheap apartment to rent, or against my better judgment, move back in with my grandmother. But if I did that, if I found excuses to stay away from them both, it meant I wouldn’t see him at all. Talk about damned if you do and damned if you don’t. It was a Catch-22 situation. I didn’t want to see him with her, but I didn’t want to give up seeing him altogether.

  I lay in my bed and let my mind drift. His green gaze stared deeply into mine and he saw my soul laid bare. He knew I wanted him, and as I let my gaze drag lazily up and down his body, I could tell he wanted me too. I moved closer, like a moth that gets drawn inexplicably to a flame. I knew I’d get burned, but I couldn’t help but dance a little closer to the warmth it exuded. The back of his hand felt rough as he gently caressed my face, and my breathing faltered a little at the electricity I felt in that one touch. His eyes told me all I needed to know as he leaned in closer. At first, his kiss was gentle, fleeting. But then he took my face in the palms of his hands and claimed my lips with his. His tongue licked at the seam of my mouth, seeking permission to collide with my own. I parted my lips on a breath, and his tongue darted in to dance with mine. It was always a strange feeling, getting used to kissing someone new, but the butterflies in my stomach took flight and I knew that this kiss would change me in ways I had yet to find the words to describe.

  “Kara.”

  The sound of my name shattered the fantasy.

  “Kara, are you coming?”

  I hated the sound of her voice right now. It grated on my nerves like nails on a chalkboard.

  “I’m coming!” I exclaimed in a huff as I grabbed my purse from the back of my bedroom door and headed to the top of the staircase.

  “Well, hurry your ass up.”

  I’d been treated to that tone of voice before. I’d put up with my fair share and then some. Over the years, I had grown used to her sense of self-righteousness. That didn’t mean I hated it any less, I had just become accustomed to her ways. Lord only knew how he put up with her and the demands she made of him and everybody else they came into contact with. I knew his mother hated her, his siblings too, but that didn’t change his love for her, apparently.

  “I said I’m coming,” I snapped as I made my way down the stairs.

  “Well, it’s about time you got out of bed. You know how important today is, right? Right?”

  “I get the message loud and clear, Zoey. Today’s the day you dress me in pink taffeta and make me look like a fucking marshmallow.”

  “Less of the sarcasm,” she seethed as she took the car keys from the bowl on the oak cabinet in the hall.

  “Yes, ma’am,” I said and added a salute for good measure.

  This would be pure fucking joy. Bridesmaid dress shopping. Zoey was a queen bitch on a normal shopping trip, never mind how she’d act while trying to find the perfect dress to make me look like the world’s most unattractive bridesmaid. Heaven forbid somebody look prettier than the bride on her big day. It wasn’t that I wanted to outshine her on her
wedding day. I really didn’t. I just didn’t want to be dressed in something that was as unflattering as things get. But I needed to get a grip on myself and be the best friend I was meant to be.

  We drove towards the mall with some awful music playing on the radio. I had moved to change stations, but Zoey had given me the stink-eye so I moved my hand back to my lap where I wrung it with the other one. I wasn’t happy about this shopping trip in the slightest, and to make matters worse, whatever dress she chose for me was something he would have to see me in. I knew she wouldn’t pick something too disgusting, as it was her wedding day after all, meaning that everything had to be ‘just so’ or she’d have a meltdown. But it was bound to be something that didn’t suit my fuller figure. I wasn’t fat, I just had curves in all the right places, whereas Zoey hadn’t filled out in any of ‘those’ areas, which made her jealous. And when she was jealous, she was mean. She was always telling me to diet or exercise more. I already ate less than she did, and I had recently joined a gym at her insistence. No bridesmaid of hers was going to look, and I quote—like a fat blob in the pictures that would be on her wall for the rest of her life—she wouldn’t let anybody embarrass her.

  Pulling into the car park, she killed the engine and looked at me with thinly veiled disgust in her brown eyes. I didn’t know what I’d done to deserve it, but I knew she’d tell me.

  “Are you going to be like this all day? Can you not pretend to be happy for me? I know you don’t like Reid, but you’re my best friend and he’s my fiancé, you have to learn to get along.”