The Lessons We Learn

by Alexandra Warren

  Now it was me sighing, resting my forehead in my hand as I told Mike, “Well, thanks for the heads-up. And if they have any questions about that night, please let them know I’ll be glad to answer them.”

  “I’m assuming it’ll be a standard investigation. Thorough review of all the cameras, security logs, etc. etc. As long as you followed all of the other procedures during that shift, you have nothing to worry about,” he replied, bringing me a little relief since I felt like that was more true than not. But just when I was getting ready to find a way to end the call, Mike added, “Hey. While I have you on the line. I saw on your Insta-majigger that you’re working with that new cereal company now. Do they give you any, like, exclusive coupons? It’s already my wife’s favorite, but boy, does that organic tag make it expensive.”

  “Did this fool really just...”

  I wanted to respond, “No more expensive than that dozen of donuts you usually devour behind her back on a daily, Mike.” But I kept that to myself, instead telling him, “I might be able to work something out if you can get this little investigation expedited.”

  “But I’m not the one in charge,” he immediately responded, something I was aware of but didn’t really care about since I knew he wasn’t completely powerless in the situation.

  If he wanted the hook-up on the cereal, he’d figure it out.

  “Well I’m not the one whose wife wants her favorite, expensive cereal, so…” I trailed, leaving the rest up to him.

  I was hardly surprised when he let out another one of his nasally sighs before offering, “I’ll see what I can do, Khalid.”

  “Appreciate it, Michael,” I replied with a hopeful grin, then ended the call for real this time. But even with Mike on my side, I knew getting back to work sooner than later was still a stretch, making my grin fall flat as I huffed, “Damn. When it rains, it pours.”

  &

  “Appreciate the touch-up, LoLo.”

  After the trash ass morning I had, it felt good to at least have my hair on point for the first time in weeks, Londyn doing a quick retwist of my outer rows to make it all look fresher than it actually was. But it was enough to get the job done; something Londyn agreed with when she insisted, “It’s your first hosting gig. The least you could do is be photo-ready since that’s the only reason they’re paying you to come. Which… I still can’t believe is actually happening. I mean, who in their right mind would give your ugly ass money just to be somewhere?”

  I knew she was only teasing, but I was still sure to give credit where it was due once I replied, “Shoutout to Jayla for that. I mean, the timing really couldn’t have been better now that I’m on leave from work.”

  “I’m surprised she didn’t come too. You know, to keep all the little heffas away for her new boy toy,” she sang, making me roll my eyes for multiple reasons.

  One, I wasn’t anybody’s damn boy toy. And two, “Nah, she didn’t seem very interested in anything “me” when I talked to her this morning. All about the business.”

  Even with the time that had passed since that phone call, I still hadn’t been able to make sense of her attitude. But just because I couldn’t make sense of it, didn’t mean it wasn’t my fault according to Londyn’s question. “What’d you do?”

  Shrugging, I defended, “I didn’t do anything. Matter of fact, listen to these messages she left me last night.”

  One of the main perks of having a woman for a best friend was that she could decode shit I couldn’t. And if there was something I had missed, I knew Londyn would find it as I played the voicemails back for her.

  With a little chuckle, she noted, “Sis was definitely faded in that second one. Did she ever tell you about her night though?”

  “No. I kept asking her, but she just avoided the question over and over again.”

  “So it must’ve been serious,” Londyn concluded, putting her hand to her chin as she guessed, “Maybe she saw something wild about you on social media, or ran into one of your old things at the hair shop, or…”

  “Or her mother came to town,” I finished for her the second I saw the picture Mila had posted of her and her mom on Instagram, meaning Jayla had surely come in contact with her too.

  Of course, that made no sense to Londyn, her face scrunched when she asked, “Why would that be an issue?”

  Though I didn’t have all the fine details, I felt like I knew enough to answer, “They don’t… have the best relationship. So I’m sure her dropping into town put her in a mood, probably induced the drinking. But that still doesn’t make sense of why she would be mad at me.”

  “If that put her in a mood, you essentially caught a stray bullet, homie,” Londyn explained before giving me a little pat to the shoulder to insist, “It’ll pass, though. Don’t worry.”

  “I wish your moods passed that easily,” Chance added the second he showed up in the living room to join us, somehow being the last one of us to finish getting dressed.

  He was already bending over the back of the couch to plant a kiss on Londyn’s forehead when she squealed, “What? Come on, babe. I’m like, an angel.”

  “Yeah, the one who turned into the devil,” he teased with a little laugh as he rounded the couch then plopped down in the spot next to Londyn, putting me in perfect third wheel position. And you would’ve thought Londyn was intentionally rubbing it in when she leaned into him to reply, “Not my fault you love it when I wear that red lingerie…”

  Before anything could pop off, I hopped up from the couch. “Aight, enough of that shit. Y’all ready to go? Our ride should be pulling up now.”

  It took a second for them to peel away from each other and stand up. But once they did, they didn’t get more than a step toward the door before Chance asked, “That’s what you’re wearing?”

  After taking a quick glance down at her dress, Londyn peeked up to sarcastically reply, “Nah. It’s just what I happen to have on seconds before I walk out of the door. Yes, this is what I’m wearing, babe. Shit, if Khalid is catching stray bullets, I might be able to catch a stray contract like his. Host me a few parties on the side for some extra cash, or at least get a deal with one of those clothing companies who falsely advertise their cheaply-made outfits.”

  The question in my head was, “Why in the world would you wanna work with them?” But Chance’s question out loud was, “What do you need extra cash for? Ain’t like you ever spend your own money anyway.”

  Knowing how fiscally-responsible Londyn was and knowing how Chance loved to spoil her ass, I was hardly surprised to hear it. And I also wasn’t really surprised to her Londyn respond, “Just because I don’t spend my own money doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have a healthy emergency fund ready just in case I ever have to flee to Mexico after murdering you and your mistress.”

  “Damn. Will you relax, crazy?” Chance asked with a laugh that was half-amused, half-shook cause he knew Londyn was dead serious.

  She only shrugged as we finally made our way out to the all-black truck that was waiting on us, tossing over her shoulder, “I’m just sayin’. Consider it a fair warning.”

  “Y’all are wild, man,” I added, shaking my head as Chance helped Londyn inside and I climbed in after the both of them. And once we were settled in for the ride, I decided to shoot Jayla a text.

  “Headed to the venue. Thanks again for the plug, boss lady.” - Khalid

  The message was plain enough, keeping things as business-related as I could just in case she still wasn’t really feeling me. And that seemed to be the case according to the tone of her response.

  “Just doing my job. Have fun.” - Jayla

  Gnawing on my lip, I considered responding with something random just to see if I could get her to crack. But when Londyn leaned over to remind me, “Give her some time. It’ll pass,” I slipped my phone back into my pocket instead, doing my best to get my head in the game for the gig.

  Of course that was a lot easier said than done, especially since it was my first time doing someth
ing like this. But eventually, I got used to being the center of attention; not that I really had a choice since the DJ kept reminding people that LadiesLoveKoolK was in the building.

  Not Khalid.

  But my damn Instagram name.

  Acting as annoyed as I felt wouldn’t have been good for the brand, so I did my best to mask it, playing it cool and nursing one drink for as long as I could until I found myself chewing ice. But just when I was getting ready to motion for the bartender to pour me up something new, I heard Londyn squeal, “My favorite bad bitch!”

  My eyes flew in her direction and were incredibly pleased with the sight of Jayla who was definitely on her bad bitch shit. I mean… gotdamn, the woman was fine as hell, half of her hair pulled up into a ponytail while the rest fell against her shoulders, her makeup on point like she had gotten it done by a professional, and her slinky silver dress with matching jewelry making her glow like a damn superstar.

  She was a damn superstar. And I was proudly on some groupie shit when I rolled up on her and asked, “Boss lady, what are you doin’ here?”

  “Can’t surprise my client at his first hosting gig?” she asked with a smirk that seemed especially sexy with everything else she had going on. But even with her appearance, I was still a little confused when I thought back on the attitude she had with me just this morning; something I was getting ready to ask her about until she put a finger to my lips to say, “We can talk about it later, okay? Let’s just have fun tonight.”

  It sounded simple enough, but something in my gut told me it wouldn’t all curl over that easily. But considering how foolish it would’ve been for me to start some shit now that she finally seemed ready to let it go - had shown up here on a mission to smooth things over and show love - I decided it was best for me to just go with the flow.

  Jayla

  I hadn’t thought this all the way through.

  After giving Khalid a cold shoulder that he didn’t really deserve this morning, I figured showing up to his event like Mila had originally suggested was a grandiose way to apologize. But I hadn’t considered the jealousy that would rear its ugly head as I watched Khalid do what he was being paid to do; mingling and dancing with the crowd - the women -, taking pictures and appearing in Snapchat videos with his fans - countless women -, and pouring shots into the mouths of women who had all shown up tonight just to see him.

  If he was really just my client, I’d be proud to see that he was going all out to make sure everyone had a good time. But now that we had completely blurred the lines of business and pleasure, I struggled to watch him… perform.

  Because that’s what this was.

  A performance.

  At the end of the night, all of these women would be forgotten about, and Khalid and I would be cuddled up in his hotel suite in our fuzzy, white robes after a few rounds of hot sex. At least that’s what I kept telling myself as things got more and more out of hand, women going as far as trying to grab on his dick because they’d seen its print in pictures and wanted to know if it was real.

  It was something I could vouch for - something I was tempted to vouch for to claim what was mine right in front of all their thirsty asses -, but there were multiple problems with that. One, it wouldn’t have been a good look for me nor for him since being an “eligible bachelor” was a huge part of his brand. And two, I couldn’t claim what wasn’t really mine since I’d been the one against doing the whole serious relationship thing.

  “Put your stiletto right in your damn mouth,” I thought to myself just as Khalid turned my way to ask, “Boss lady, you good?”

  Plastering on my best fake smile, I gave him a nod that must’ve been a little too aggressive considering the way his eyes squinted with concern. But before he could say anything more about it, he was pulled away by a group of girls who all wanted to take pictures with him, one of them even going as far as asking me to do it for them.

  I really wanted to take her phone and launch it across the venue. But if Khalid could be in business mode, then I could to, agreeing to take the picture until one of the girls decided to pose by bending over right in front of him.

  “Oh, hell no,” I thought, getting ready to set her straight until Londyn jumped in to say, “I’ll take it! Jayla, go grab yourself a drink.”

  Before I could protest, her boyfriend Chance, who I really didn’t know well enough for him to be touching me, was already pulling me towards the table of complimentary drinks, shoving a glass in my hand when he said, “You looked like you were about to get the club shut down.”

  Doing my best to brush it off, I slammed what was essentially a shot back before telling him, “I’m good. She just…”

  “Didn’t have to do all that? I know. It was extra as fuck. But just think about how much potential money you would’ve messed up by slapping that girl upside her head.”

  “It’s not about the money,” I blurted, catching the way Chance’s eyebrow piqued as he lifted his own glass to his mouth. And after a thick swallow, he put words to what I hadn’t yet said to him out loud.

  “So the feelings are really that mutual, huh? I mean, I know Londyn said y’all were… involved. But it’s a lot deeper than that now, isn’t it?”

  Hearing how much he knew about our situation was a little alarming. But somehow, I still felt comfortable enough to admit, “Yeah. It is.”

  I wasn’t exactly sure when it happened; maybe when I was bragging to my mother about how great he was, or maybe when he made love to me over and over again the day we played hooky, or hell, maybe it was the day he showed that first little inkling of interest in me at the convenience store when I was at my most unattractive. But what was happening between Khalid and I was a lot more than just some business partners with benefits situation.

  It was something real.

  “Does Khalid know how you feel?” Chance asked, knocking me from my thoughts as I considered his complicated question.

  Of course Khalid knew I felt something for him, but I honestly wasn’t sure if he knew the extent of my feelings, especially with the mixed vibes I had given him last night into this morning. So being as honest as I could, I answered, “Kinda. I mean, we haven’t not talked about it.”

  “Let me put it like this. Did you show up tonight on some “surprising my client” shit, or were you really here on some “going to see about my man” shit?”

  Shrugging, I answered, “Both, I guess. I mean, it’s complicated, you know?”

  “It doesn’t have to be, homie. And I know Khalid fucks with you heavy. So really, it’s on you to decide how much you’re gonna let his little fan club get to you.”

  There was more to it than that, more that I couldn’t say out loud without pouring my heart out about my trust issues to who was essentially a stranger. And he didn’t really seem too in the mood to listen to any more of my crap anyway, his focus completely on his woman as she danced her way back over to us.

  It was the same way I’d catch Khalid looking at me sometimes, pure admiration in his eyes even when Londyn teasingly asked, “What are you lookin’ at?”

  “You just so damn fine. And you know it too,” he replied, wrapping his arms around her in a hug and giving her a kiss that basically said, “Fuck who’s watching us”.

  Wait.

  That means fuck me too.

  I turned away from their moment just in time to see Khalid coming my way, his demeanor proud yet exhausted now that things were finally beginning to settle down. But just because he was low on energy didn’t mean he didn’t have enough left in the tank to ask me to dance with him; an offer I was excited to accept because it meant having him all to myself. And as Alina Baraz sang about being someone’s “Fantasy”, I couldn’t help but feel like Khalid was exactly that for me.

  My refuge.

  My escape.

  My fantasy.

  Our groove was easy yet intimate as he kept his arms wrapped around my waist from behind while we vibed, the little kisses he sprinkled against my bar
e shoulder throughout the song making me feel secure in the moment. And even after the song was over, he stayed put for a few more until he completed the hours he was being paid for.

  We collected the check and made quick work of getting Londyn and Chance dropped off at their place so we could get back to his hotel room. And once we were there, you would’ve thought Khalid had never been tired at all considering how quickly he pounced on me, grabbing my ass and kissing me like his life depended on it.

  Like he had been thinking about it all night.

  It was exhilarating to learn I wasn’t alone in that regard as he pushed one of the thin straps of my dress down and moved his lips from mine to my shoulder, biting into it then soothing it with a kiss that had my lips parted in satisfaction. Then he brought his hand to my neck and gently used it to press me into the wall of his suite, keeping me exactly where he wanted me as he completely devoured every inch of my mouth, the flavor of whatever liquor he had consumed during the night only adding to the high.

  But I wanted more; needed more.

  So with our mouths still connected, I reached between us to unbutton his pants, growing frustrated with the zipper that wasn’t as easy to undo with the distraction of Khalid using a stiff hand to push my dress up over my hips. And I quickly gave up once he pushed past my panties and hooked two fingers inside of me, groaning into my mouth when he discovered how wet I was.

  “I missed you,” he whispered against my lips as he created a steady rhythm with his hand, the combination of his words and his touch driving me insane in the most satisfying way possible. And he only upped the ante when he kept his fingers plugged inside of me as he used his thumb to rub circles against my clit, my knees growing even weaker when he asked, “Did you miss me too, baby?”

  The only thing I could do was nod, too overwhelmed with pleasure as he slowly removed his fingers and brought them to my lips, allowing me to taste myself before putting them in his mouth to finish off the rest of me in the most salacious way. And now that we were sharing my flavor, it only seemed right to combine the two with a kiss as I slipped my tongue between his lips and devoured his mouth the same way he had done to me, my hands finally making strides on his zipper as I got it down with an aggressive tug then pushed his pants from his hips to find exactly what I was looking for.