Damage (Havoc #2)

by Stella Rhys

He gave a sexy laugh. “I’m certainly about to,” he murmured, stepping forward, leaning in and closing his mouth over mine. Delicious heat billowed through my body as I reveled in his touch, one hand cupped behind my neck, the other resting in the dip of my waist. The kiss lasted barely two seconds but it was enough to ease my overactive mind. He had kissed me at Gavin’s gala, in front of his world of people, and the way he had done it felt like some kind of bold declaration. I wasn’t surprised that shortly after he pulled away, a new circle formed around us.

  “I’m so sorry, but Abram’s like my own son, so now you have no choice but to introduce yourself to me, beautiful girl.” The woman who approached, I learned, was Gavin’s mother, Sylvie Theroux. Her white hair was short and chic, her skin just tanned enough to make her pale blue eyes shockingly striking. She wore her crow’s feet with pride as she beamed at me, holding both my hands with an instant love that made me want to hug her. She was full of more brightness than I imagined possible for a woman whose only child was murdered a year ago. After I introduced myself, Sylvie marveled. “Isla. What a beautiful and fitting name,” she sighed. “I have every intention of embarrassing him when I say this, but you are by far the loveliest one I’ve ever seen Abram with. And the first one he’s ever brought to one of our functions – though I can see why he decided to break the streak with you.”

  “Oh,” my eyes fluttered and I managed to utter some sort of gracious response while telling myself not to let it get to my head. But Sylvie wasn’t done yet.

  “Abram, darling, I hope you’ll forgive my excitement. You just never let me meet your girlfriends.”

  I nearly spit out my champagne. The word “girlfriend” had me frozen with embarrassment. Stiff, I flashed Abram a look of apology, but he wasn’t looking at me – he was smiling with Sylvie.

  “That’s not true, I just haven’t had any till now.”

  Wait. What? I blinked at Abram, waiting for him to give me the same face Evan did when we had dinner with his grandma and he told her that he’d gotten a job interview. The nah-I’m-just-shutting-her-up kind of look. But instead of that, I got Abram’s hand on my lower back, rubbing small circles that warmed every last inch of my skin. I worked through my breathlessness to carry on the ensuing conversations. I was happy to talk to Sylvie about her son’s fundraisers that I’d been a part of as a teacher, but it did feel like ages till I was finally alone with Abram again.

  The second we were, Abram turned to me with a grin.

  “Freaked out?”

  “Depends.”

  “On what?”

  “If you meant it,” I murmured, staring straight ahead at his chest. “Or if you could mean it eventually. Me being your…”

  “My girlfriend?” Abram tipped my chin up. I held my breath at the earnest look in his eyes.

  “Yes.”

  He smiled, stroking my bottom lip. “I could mean it, Isla. I could mean it today.”

  I locked my knees when they went weak. I could feel the beginnings of a soaring joy ballooning like the most pleasant buzz inside my chest. “What are you saying, Abram Lenox – that you want to date me?”

  “I was under the impression that I’d been dating you.”

  “I mean exclusively,” I chewed the corner of my lip. “As my boyfriend.”

  He broke into a grin I could lick. “Yes. I want to do that.”

  I felt as if I was being lifted off my feet. “You do?”

  “Why do you look so surprised?” Abram murmured his question, holding my waist, bringing me away from the crowd.

  “I don’t know,” I breathed.

  “Yes you do.”

  I shook my head, everything besides Abram a blur. “I don’t know. Because you haven’t had a girlfriend since high school. Because you have more options lined up for you than most men in this world combined. And every one of them is tall and gorgeous.”

  “But none of them you.”

  My breath hitched in my throat. We were out in the quiet hall now. He had walked me out there without my knowing, perhaps because my feet really weren’t touching the ground. Palming my cheek, Abram kissed me. Help me believe you. I wanted to say the words aloud but I knew they were needy so I shut myself up and put my hand over Abram’s, leaning my face into him, savoring his lips as they pressed sweet kisses on my forehead.

  “You’re all the strength and love and compassion I crave, Isla. You’re perfect.”

  “You’re a liar.”

  “I’m not. You’re my medicine, Isla. I stand next to you and I feel better. I feel good.” A faint smile crept onto his lips as he ran his hand down my neck, to my chest, fingering the curve of my breast. “And you’re so fucking beautiful it blows my mind. I touch your body and every thought in my head turns to you, I can’t even help it. When I’m inside you I feel like I can throw it all away, everything else, if God, anyone lets me live in that moment forever. I’ve stopped trying to figure out what it is you do to me. You could be a medicine or a drug, I don’t really know or care because you have everything I want that I never thought I could find in one person. So if you let me, I’m going to hold onto you.” He cracked a smile that stole my breath away. “And hopefully I can find ways here and there to repay you.”

  “For what?”

  “The way you heal me without even trying.”

  And there goes my heart, too. “Abram,” I exhaled, wishing I had the words to tell him how I felt. But I didn’t so I said what I could in my kiss, pulling him tight against my lips, tasting and breathing him till I felt drunk off love. I felt it there, in that moment. What I’d questioned before was suddenly undeniably real. I loved Abram. But I couldn’t say it so I simply kissed him, smiling softly against his lips when I realized I was kissing my boyfriend. We both ignored one of the sponsors who was politely trying to get his attention from afar – at least for as long as we could. I wished the moment didn’t have to end but I took comfort in the fact that it was the perfect kind to relive in my head, over and over that night till I fell asleep.

  Of course, that would only happen if my night ended just as perfectly as this moment did, and I should’ve known – with Jesse Toro in my life, there was rarely a chance for peaceful let alone perfect.

  ~

  I had to physically tackle Rhode to get her to shut up. I’d considered telling her after we got home but when I realized I’d probably spend the night with Abram, I went ahead and spilled about the boyfriend talk. Rhode had reacted with a giant gasp followed by a weird squawking noise to go with her excited arm flapping, and I’d wrapped my arms around her like a farmer containing a wild turkey. “Please! Please, please don’t make a scene because he’s totally watching and knows what I’m telling you!” I giggled desperately.

  “I can’t help myself!”

  “You’ll have to, this is a black tie event!” I hissed. “And he’s about to make his speech so please, please be a normal human being right now!”

  “Oh God, I need a Xanax. A happy Xanax,” Rhode gasped, tongue out, fanning herself as if she’d just eaten a habanero. I was laughing so hard I had to pull us out of the room so we’d stop attracting weird looks. I caught Abram from afar, cracking up on our way out. A simple moment but it was the happiest I’d felt in awhile.

  “Rhode!” I snapped when we got out into the hall, wiping tears from my eyes.

  “I’m sorry! Oh my God! Is this where he kissed you? Let me inhale the walls.”

  “Oh my God.” I was still laughing as I trailed off but it was cut short when I caught something from the corner of my eye – a distinctly smug and laidback swagger that made my heart stop and my stomach twist. For some reason, I refused to look, staring at Rhode, who was seconds from noticing him since she faced him directly. She was my alert. And when her giant grin suddenly faltered, her head cocking with confusion, I knew Jesse was right behind me.

  “Christ, Abram’s swinging a heavy dick with you on his arm tonight.”

  Rhode’s stare went from Jesse to me. I could
tell from the look in her eye that she suddenly knew – I’d lied to her about something. Many things. She didn’t know what they were but she was slowly figuring it out. I tried to flash as much apology in my eye as I could before spinning around, suddenly chest-to-chest with Jesse, shaking his head at the slit in my dress.

  “You’re like every billionaire’s wet dream. Trophy wife from head-to-toe.”

  I breathed hard. My worlds were colliding so hard I was in a daze. “Jesse, what are you doing here?”

  He cleared his throat. “Well, you know, just did a couple things I’m not necessarily proud of to get the information we needed, so now I guess I’m here to break the good news to your boyfriend and hopefully pour enough liquor down my throat to forget the despicable shit I just pulled.”

  My blood ran cold. “What did you do?” But the second the question escaped my lips, a hard, angry wall came between us. I stumbled back suddenly, feeling Rhode grab onto me as Nate growled in Jesse’s face.

  “No one told you to come here.”

  “Is this you mean-mugging? Listen, go get your master for me, I have something to tell him.”

  “Fucking trash – just get the hell out of my face. I shouldn’t even have to explain this to you but you’re not welcome here, so I’m telling you right now to disappear before I put you on the fucking ground.”

  Jesse grinned. “You? You mean you’d miss your swing and get clocked before calling Daddy Abram to – ”

  It happened exactly. Rhode screamed as Jesse caught Nate’s fist with one hand and socked him in the eye with the other. In seconds, a crowd was spilling out the event hall, collectively gasping at Nate clutching his face on the ground. My lack of a shock was the only thing that surprised me as Abram’s security herded everyone back in. I was almost blank, unfeeling till I spotted him. Abram. He hurtled out the doors with a look of rage in his eye that struck instant fear in my heart. I couldn’t stop him as he flew past me, stepping over Nate and slamming Jesse hard into the wall. “You must be out of your fucking mind.” His lips barely moved as he spoke, his arm holding me away when I rushed to him. Jesse groaned.

  “Yeah, I must be for agreeing to help you dicks.”

  “Abram!” I hissed as he shoved his forearm harder against Jesse’s throat.

  He ignored me. “Don’t fuck with me right now. You knew exactly what this night was, Toro,” he growled under his breath. “Leonard and Sylvie Theroux are behind that wall and as far as they’re concerned, you murdered their son. And whether or not it was you or your piece of shit brother, this isn’t the night to explain to them, so walk the fuck away.”

  “You got it.” Jesse’s casual tone didn’t match the snarl on his lip as Abram released him. He took a crumpled paper from his pocket and held it up. “I’ll just walk right the fuck away with Stef’s location and you sorry assholes can figure this out on your own. Guess we’ll just race to him from here.”

  I watched Abram’s stiff, broad shoulders expand and contract with his every breath. “I’d rather you kill him alone than deal with your bullshit again, so go ahead.”

  “Kill him? He’s my brother, who knows what I’ll do. I might just take his dumb ass with me on the run this time. You’re just about brain dead around Isla so I can pretty much count on staying alive, right?” His cheek bruising before my eyes, Jesse gave me a wink. My face grew hot. I couldn’t think of a thing to say and it didn’t matter because he was back to laughing by the time Abram had him again by two furious handfuls of his black T-shirt. He laughed harder when Nate snatched the crumpled paper from his hands, opening it up to find nothing. “I put the info safe in my phone, you idiot. But it’s always fun when you fall for my bullshit,” he said just as an innocent voice broke through the chaos.

  “Abram? We need you for your speech!”

  I turned. Sylvie. Shit. My feet had me flying to her but she spotted Jesse before I could do a thing and suddenly, there was a gasp and then screeching. My stomach went cold. The sounds she made were barely human as she instantly thrashed in my arms till Nate took over, hastily whispering a million words of comfort to his aunt but in vain. Sylvie, chic and polished just a moment before, was suddenly a ghost from my childhood nightmares, paper-white and wailing with her mouth wide open, her arms outstretched. Rhode held onto me as I watched, frozen, helpless, Sylvie’s flowing chiffon sleeves rippling in slow motion before my eyes. The night for Gavin had spiraled into mayhem. The sound around me drowned out to nothing as I watched Abram one-hand a chokehold on Jesse, the only person who could ever look blasé while being strangled half to death. It was surreal. It felt like a dream.

  I didn’t wake up till I saw the switch flip in Jesse’s green eyes, as if he’d suddenly decided to care. One blink and I missed him pinning Abram on his back, his fingers digging a good inch into his throat. I couldn’t hear my own screams or the words Jesse snarled at Abram’s face – all I could feel was my knees hit the ground, Rhode holding me back as I tried to lunge for them. It was no dream. It was a nightmare and it felt like it wasn’t going to end.

  But of all people, Nate, red-faced and bleeding, eventually muscled the situation under control.

  He was jostling Abram into the arms of his own security before rushing to me and jabbing his finger toward the elevator. His hand crushing my wrist, I turned to see the doors closing on Jesse. “Don’t let him go anywhere,” Nate spat at me, eyes wild. “I don’t care what it is you do to get him to listen, just do it because if that piece of shit disappears with Stefan, you can kiss the Abram you know goodbye, I promise you. You have no idea where the fuck his head was at when this first went down and you won’t like crazy Abram one fucking bit, so get your feet moving and go.”

  chapter thirteen

  Warm rain fell from the sky as I half-ran, half-teetered in my stilettos, following Jesse as quickly as I could and drawing stares from tourists for a solid three blocks. When he turned into a corridor between two buildings, I tore at the straps of my heels and kicked them off, running fast so I wouldn’t lose him. Jesse ignoring me while I chased after him – I’d have laughed over the turn of events if it weren’t for the mess that had just happened.

  “Jesse! Jesse, wait!” I called just before rounding the sharp corner. But when I did I saw he had already stopped. In the middle of the alley, he leaned against the wall, hands in his pockets and rainwater dripping from his forehead to his shoes. He stared at the ground and only then, with a shiver down my spine, did I realize where I was. I was in the same alley where I’d first met Abram. The same alley in which I was certain I’d seen Stefan Toro killed. Jesse’s eyes were blank as he stared at the gravel.

  “It was this one, right?” His voice was hollow. Catching my breath, I swallowed.

  “Yes.” The bar I’d been at with Evan was further down the block. I had run out of it from the other direction, just four or so months ago, when the biggest active problem in my life was my best friend marrying my ex. It was genuinely awful but compared to what I was living now it felt like middle school drama. I listened to the water smacking down on the pavement, watching Jesse stand frozen till a grimace ghosted his face.

  “You have no idea what it felt like to see those pictures. Stefan’s head split open. I could see his skull.”

  I know. I saw it in person. I thought the words but I certainly didn’t say them. “I’m sorry, Jesse. I know it must’ve been hard.” He didn’t reply so I simply stood with him for a moment, watching him stare at the brick wall, the rain washing away his usual smugness – that smirking attitude that constantly hid what he was truly feeling. Without it, he was bare now, stripped more naked than I’d ever seen him. It felt as if I were meeting him for the first time. “Do you miss him?”

  “Of course. I’m never gonna stop. He used to be such a fuckin’ good kid.”

  “Yeah?” My toes curled against the gravel, just starting to register the pain of running barefoot. “What was he like?” I could hear my gentle, feathery soft teacher voice coming out
. I hadn’t used it in ages. I took a step closer as Jesse slid down the wall to sit on the ground. I wasn’t sure if this was the right direction to go in but I had nothing else. “What was good about him?”

  Jesse looked at the ground. For awhile, his face was completely blank. But then the littlest smirk formed on his lips and I knew it was for Stefan. “That kid worshipped me,” he laughed, staring into his hands. “Growing up at least. Probably because I chose to live with our mom. He didn’t get to see me as much as he wanted but I was always the cool older brother so whenever I came around, he pulled out everything he could to impress me. New toys, new shoes, school papers. He was like a Golden Retriever dropping all his favorite toys at my feet when I got home. It was funny. He was just happy all the time. Didn’t realize what kind of family he was from yet.”

  I tried to jog my memory about what Jesse had told me about Stefan from the beginning. “He wasn’t the smartest kid. But things weren’t fair for him when we were younger. He didn’t get a shot at normal. And that was my fault.” I gathered my dress in my hands and slowly lowered myself to kneel in front of him, letting my bare knees and shins press against the pebbly, wet pavement. “You said things weren’t fair to Stefan when he was younger and it was your fault,” I murmured. “What did you mean by that?”

  Jesse finally looked up at me, his glinting green eyes lighting the dark. “I told you that?”

  I swallowed. “Yes.”

  “Christ,” he sneered. But just as I thought I’d lost him, Jesse’s gaze floated away and I could tell he was traveling back to a memory. He blinked water from his lashes. “You know my grandfather?”

  “Not personally,” I tried smiling. It was a comment he would’ve laughed at under normal circumstances but I knew these weren’t normal circumstances. Jesse Toro was sitting in an alley with me, soaked in rain and considering taking me with him on a mental road trip. I felt as if I had him in a place more vulnerable than anyone else in the world ever had. It made me thankful that I wasn’t somebody dangerous – someone who would use this against him. “Tell me then. Tell me about your grandfather,” I said lightly, waiting to hear about some sweet old Sicilian man who bounced his grandkids on his knee. But that wasn’t the story.