by Drew Sera
“Yes, I had a leg cramp when I got out of bed,” I lied.
I pushed the chills and worry of it out of my mind and climbed into the tub with our beautiful girl. I found her midsection under the mass of bubbles and pulled her close to me. As long as I had them, I would be fine.
23
Thursday, March 13th
Anthony
“Unless you say ‘red,’ I decide when you’ve had enough.”
My eyes flew open, and I found myself staring at the wall. I was facing away from Sydney. Fucking dream. I sat up and looked at the clock as I wiped the sweat from my forehead. My heart was pounding, and my mind was all over the place. I took a deep breath and glanced over my shoulder at Sydney sleeping peacefully.
She told me I could wake her up and that she wouldn’t ask me anything. Sleeping through the night was such a rare event for her, and I shouldn’t wake her up.
But, she did say that I could.
No. Not going to do that to Sydney.
I went to the bathroom and took some ibuprofen to combat my headache. Decisions. I could go to Sydney’s writing room and write for a bit. Although, I’m not sure I want to let my mind have the freedom with a pen right now. I could just sit in one of the chairs in our sitting area of the bedroom. Or, I could get back in bed. Before I thought that I had made the decision, my feet took me back to bed.
The weight of my body getting back in bed caused Sydney to stir. I froze, hoping that she would have settled back down. She rolled over, facing me and her arm stretched out, reaching for me. I lay back down and let her hand find me. I was on my back when Sydney’s hand slid down my chest to my stomach and eventually made its way to the scar on my side. It was then that I felt my pulse begin returning to normal.
“Are you guys taking separate cars today?” Sydney asked while I delivered glasses of juice to the table for her and me.
“Yes, baby. I have a dinner meeting with Cheng tonight right after work. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to eat with you guys tonight,” Colin said.
“Don’t worry, sunshine. I’ll feed you. We’ll sit in front of the T.V. and eat cereal out of the box with our fingers,” I joked.
During breakfast, we teased and kept things light with Sydney. I even pulled her pants down to check on her ass. It was still red, but no sign of any broken blood vessels.
Gina was coming over again to spend the morning with Sydney and then she’d be on her own during the afternoon. It seems to be working out well. I had had a few moments to myself this morning and wrote in the journal before I set it under the Robin figure on her coffee table.
Colin and I kissed Sydney goodbye, and I winked at her, causing a huge smile to spread across her face. I stood by the door in the garage and listened for the lock to slide over in place while Colin armed the house alarm from his phone.
“Think I should get this fixed?” Colin asked me as we looked down at the hood of his BMW.
“Why? It’s kind of a reminder of our sex activities with Sydney,” I said as I admired the slight dent around the middle of the hood.
“True. But it wasn’t Sydney that dented the thing. You did,” he pointed out.
I shrugged.
“I had needs that night,” I admitted.
“And last night,” he reminded me.
I nodded.
“Yes, and last night,” I agreed, smiling as I thought back to last night and Sydney bound to the headboard by my rope.
I made my way to my car in the driveway and headed to work. There was something important I needed to handle this morning. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and now that things are finally starting to settle down, I can concentrate on it this morning.
Once I parked, I sent Sydney a text and a picture of me smiling at her from my car.
AG: Hi sunshine. Thank you so much for trusting me to push last night. It meant a lot to me. I love you and hope your ass doesn’t hurt today. On second thought, I hope it stings a little bit to serve as a reminder. ;)
Winking smiley faces in texts melt Sydney. Therefore, they’re a must. I had a plan of attack for the morning and wanted to make sure I got everything done that I needed to so I could leave by 3:30 today. Colin would be out late, and it would be one of the few rare occasions for one on one time with Sydney.
“Good morning, Mr. Graves,” my secretary greeted me as I approached her desk.
“Hannah, good morning. Anything urgent going on?”
“No, sir. Though Mitch stopped by and asked for me to let him know when you had a few moments.”
“Give me about ten minutes and then let him know I’m free.”
She nodded, and I headed into my office. I remember Mitch looked upset about something last night. I’m sure his evening wasn’t nearly as exciting as mine was. Despite having that fucked up dream, I still felt incredible after tying Sydney to the headboard and playing a bit rougher with her.
I quickly booted up the laptop and pulled up the website that I was looking for and began scouting out info that would help me with my tasks today. Immersed in what I was doing, I hadn’t seen Mitch walk in.
“Have a few?” he asked from my doorway.
“Yes, come in,” I said as he shut my office door and made his way to my desk.
I minimized my screen and moved some papers to the side. When I looked up at Mitch, I could tell he had something big on his mind.
“What’s up, man?” I asked.
“I try not to poke my head into other people’s business unless someone I care about could get hurt.”
I frowned because I wasn't getting where he was going with his cryptic message. And my head was full of too much stuff going on this morning without trying to play games with Mitch.
“I saw you kissing Sydney last night at the club in the hallway.”
Fuck. Jesus. I tossed my pen down and leaned back in my chair with my heart nearly pounding out of my chest. Out of habit, I reached for my chest and held it over my sternum as I looked at Mitch.
“He’s your best friend, Anthony, and he loves that girl. After everything they've been through, how the fuck on earth could you do this to him?”
It was as though my head wasn't even processing this conversation. How could I have been so careless last night? It was like my head was on a delayed reaction.
“Colin trusts you so much. While your ass was in the hospital, Colin was beside himself with worry. It was during that time that I realized the bond you and him have. You went away with them to help them. He trusts you to take Sydney to and from doctor appointments. You've betrayed him.”
My phone vibrated on my desk and startled me. I glanced down to see a text coming in from Sydney.
SB: I found the M&M’s! Thank you, Sir. Love you.
I made no move to pick the phone up and glanced back at Mitch.
“Is that her?”
I didn't answer him. I tried quickly to decide what to do here.
“I'm not going to tell Colin, but dammit Anthony, think about what you’re doing.”
“Mitch, he knows.”
Mitch sat there staring at me in disbelief.
“What?”
I nodded and held my index finger up for him to give me a second. I picked up my phone and dialed Colin’s office. Colin and I needed to settle this, and we needed to be united in doing so.
“What’s up?” Colin said into the receiver.
“Hey, can you come to my office, please.”
He knew by the tone of my voice that I needed him quickly and that I wasn't in a joking mood. My heart was pounding, and I'd swear to god that the pounding of my heart could be seen throbbing through my shirt.
“Is everything ok?”
“No, just come over, please. The door is shut, but just walk in.”
The line went dead, and Mitch stared at me. We sat in silence until my door burst open and Colin appeared. He frowned when he saw Mitch sitting at my desk because I’m sure he thought I was having a meltdown moment or something. He
shut the door and came over, taking a seat next to Mitch.
“What's this; a meeting of the minds? A secret meeting between my Chief of Financial Officer and my Chief of Operations Officer?” Colin lightly joked.
“Mitch saw me kissing Sydney last night at the club.”
Colin didn’t even know that I kissed Sydney last night in the club. I had lost my head at the club and acted irresponsibly.
“Mitch was concerned that I was doing something less than favorable and behind your back,” I said, and then Colin cut me off and stood up.
With his hands in his pockets, he began pacing around my office. I felt horrible that my behavior last night put us in this situation.
“Anthony isn’t doing anything behind my back, Mitch. This is a little difficult to explain.”
Mitch also stood and held his hands up.
“Please, I’m not here to pry. You don’t have to explain anything to me. It’s not my business. And I was telling Anthony that I don’t make a habit out of getting into people’s business. I had hoped to have talked some sense into Anthony and feared that he was doing something behind your back, without so much as a care about you. Or Sydney.”
Colin looked pissed now as he quickly approached my desk.
“Stand up, Anth.” He motioned for me to join him and Mitch by the couches in my office. When I got within reach of him, he pulled me over by my arm and said, “loosen your tie and take off your dress shirt, Anth.”
“What?”
“Please.”
Colin’s tone was begging me to trust him as he returned his attention to Mitch while I began unbuttoning my dress shirt. Mitch stood across from us Colin pushed my sleeve up, and pulled my arm closer to where Mitch could see it closer.
“Forgive me, Mitch, if my voice makes me sound angry. I’m not, but I want you to understand.” Colin paused for a minute and pointed to the spot on my arm where that punk ass prick, Howard, cut me in the lobby.
“Remember last October when that asshole Sydney was seeing came to the office?” Colin asked Mitch.
Mitch nodded, and Colin tapped on my tiny scar from the knife wound from Howard.
“Anthony carries this wound from keeping her safe.”
Fuck, I knew where he was going with this, and I didn’t need to be made out to look like a hero for anything. Colin pulled up my undershirt, exposing my abdomen. He pointed to the knife wound I got from Paul when he and I fought in the woods that night.
“Sydney’s abductor stabbed Anthony here. He carries this because he cared.” Colin pushed my shirt up higher to expose the scarring around where the bullet entered my body. “This is where Sydney’s abductor shot him. It lodged in his chest, and his lung collapsed.” Colin dropped my shirt and flung his arm around my shoulder. “I almost lost my best friend that night. Those are the scars you can see from him caring. What you can’t see, are all the invisible scars he carries…because he cared so damn much. And do you know what I hate?”
Mitch shook his head. Colin let go of me, walked to my desk and grabbed the picture that he and Sydney gave me for my birthday and thrust it at Mitch. Mitch held the picture frame in his hands, and Colin pointed to it.
“I hate the fact that this man who cares so much, worries about keeping this picture out on his desk. This is the girl he loves. The girl he protected. The girl he killed for and the girl he almost died for. Yet, he can’t let that out. That’s all on lockdown the second he steps foot in this building. He just takes a deep breath and pushes it down. And why? Because he fucking cares. He cares about me and this business and what others will think. Everything he fought for is in this picture. This is everything to Anthony, and it sucks that he has to pretend it’s nothing more than a picture with his best friend and his best friend’s girl.”
“I’m sorry, Colin. I had no idea. I’m sorry Anthony. Damn. I lost sleep last night wondering how to approach Anthony about this.”
“Thank you for keeping an eye out for my interest, Mitch. But if you’re going to peg anything on Anthony, saying he doesn’t care about Sydney or me, couldn’t be further from the truth.”
Mitch nodded and handed me back my picture.
“I had no idea. I knew that Anthony just was always there for you. I had no clue that the three of you were involved.”
Colin laughed and looked over at me.
“This is where it gets a little extra complicated, Mitch.” Colin looked over at me and then back at Mitch. “Do you know what a V relationship is?”
“No idea,” Mitch said while shaking his head.
“Simply put, two people are involved with the same person. They connect with another person; Sydney. Anthony and I are the ‘legs’ to the ‘v’, and Sydney is the hinge…which means, we only have sex with Sydney…not each other.”
Mitch was quiet for a few moments and then nodded, accepting it.
“Ohhh, got it. So, you two aren’t—”
In unison, Colin and I confirmed that we weren’t sexually involved, and the three of us shared a laugh.
“James would shit his pants if he heard you were gay, Anthony. So, may I ask, how long the three of you have been, the V thing?” he asked.
“Since November,” Colin replied.
“Wow, you guys hid it well. Thanks for sharing all of this with me. It stays in this office between us, I swear to it.”
Mitch stood to leave and apologized for having brought it up. I can’t fault the guy. He was genuinely concerned for Colin and Sydney. Mitch closed the door behind him when he left, and I began putting my dress shirt back on.
“Sorry about the shirt thing. I wanted him to see what caring has done to you.”
“It’s fine. I don’t have any regrets.” I unbuckled my belt and unzipped my pants to tuck my shirt in. I concentrated on my belt and then began tying my tie. “I’d do every bit of it over again.”
“I have two huge regrets, Anth.”
I whipped my head up to look at him.
“What, Col?”
“I regret arguing with you that night you left—”
I cut him off.
“Colin, stop it. We’ve talked about this.”
“I pushed you out when I should have kept you closer.”
I stood there looking down at the floor in my office.
“Are we ever going to move past that, Colin?” I shrugged my arms in frustration. “I left. I’m an adult, and I did it on my own accord. You didn’t push me out. I left. That’s on me. We’ve talked about this.”
“We’ve glossed over this.”
“Well, fuck Colin. Why don’t we call a fucking staff meeting and let’s announce that, too? We’ll make it a big sit down afternoon event and have lunch catered. That’s a fucking bullshit thing to regret, Col. You had no control over what I did that night. I WAS AT FAULT! What the fuck else do you regret?”
“Letting you chase Paul.”
“Goddamn, you Colin. Get out of my office.”
“No.”
“No? I wasn’t asking you.”
“You’re dropping, Anthony.”
What?
I was so angry at how this morning had gone that I could feel my body shake. After such an incredible night with Sydney, I was in the gutter now. I paced and thought about what he was saying. I was dropping. Top drop. Last night I was on cloud nine. I got the chills badly before bed. Woke up from the bad dream…fuck. I flopped down on the couch.
Instead of my frustration subsiding, it was getting worse. I felt…exposed. Too much ripped open within the last hour with Mitch. Too much talk about the woods. We almost lost Sydney. And I was at fault for all this shit that happened this morning. I have no one to be angry at other than myself.
“I'm sorry my actions lacked control last night,” I admitted to Colin.
“Relax, Anth. Mitch isn't going to say anything. No harm was done. I'm just sorry that you have to restrain so much of the good stuff in your life.”
“It's fine. I knew what I was getting into, an
d it’s all worth it. And I have the picture out. So, I'm fine.”
He was looking at me, assessing me.
“What, Col?”
“Last night was pretty intense for you, huh?”
Fuck yeah, it was. That was my first reaction to his comment, and then I started second guessing why he said it. Did I look like I was a mess?
“It was incredible to be able to play with Sydney like that. I think she’s starting to get better.”
“She is. She just needs us, Anth. She's starting to stay alone a little bit here and there, and she’s writing a lot. She loves writing.”
That was the truth. Sydney has been writing often, and she’ll talk with us about what she writes about. It’s good for her.
Colin hung out in my office for a bit longer, which I knew was his way of keeping an eye on me until I calmed down.
“I'm sorry I swore at you and threw you out of my office.”
Colin laughed and shook his head.
“You tried throwing me out of your office.” I laughed along with him at that. “It's ok. This morning caught both of us by surprise. We dealt with it. But Anth,” Colin leaned forward over his knees. “Take it easy today.”
Colin got up and left my office, closing the door softly behind him. I took a deep breath and went back to my desk to work on the few things I wanted to accomplish.
24
Thursday, March 13th
Colin
I had wanted to suggest to Anthony that he go home and spend the day with Sydney, but I think it might have had the opposite effect that I was going for. It was only a matter of time before someone from work had found out. Even being as discrete as we were, there would always be an act of passion, like last night, that would be waiting in the wings to erupt.
And I was worried about him. Last night was so intense for him. He tied Sydney to the headboard of our bed, and he got to unleash a bit of him that he has restrained for Sydney's sake. But our gorgeous girl showed him that she can keep up with him. She knows that he has nothing but her best interest at heart and he will always take care of her afterward.