Cinderella Ate My Daughter
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superheroines in, 144–46
see also childhood consumerism and marketing; Internet
Manago, Adriana, 165, 167
Martin, Carol, 66–67, 68–70, 71, 158, 215n
Mary Poppins, 36
Mary Tyler Moore Show, The, 41
Mattel, 15, 29, 32, 42, 49, 50–51
Maxim, 120, 123
Meier, Megan, 168–69, 172–73
Mendler, Bridgit, 128
Meyer, Stephenie, 109
MGA, 48, 49, 50, 51
MGM, 120
Miller, Laura, 111
mixed-sex play, 66, 67–70, 72, 158, 205n–6n
Miyazaki, Hayao, 185–86
Monster High, 50, 144, 186
Mooney, Andy, 13, 14, 15, 16, 22, 41, 88, 116
Moore, Susanna, 148, 217n
More, 138, 215n–16n
Moxie Girlz, 50, 91, 138, 155, 161
Mr. Mopp’s, 95–96
Ms., 55
MTV, 75, 116, 122, 169
Muir-Sukenick, Jill, 138–39
Mulan, 14, 187–88
Mulan II, 187–88
Muppets, 39, 40, 43
Muppet Show, The, 39
Murdoch, Rupert, 178
My Beautiful Mommy (Salzhauer), 139, 216n
MySpace, 165, 168, 178
NAACP, 181
Narcissistic Personality Inventory, 166
National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, 170
National Institute of Mental Health, 71
New York Post, 121
New York Times, The, 1, 71, 217n
New York Times Magazine, The, 4
Nickelodeon, 15, 42, 116, 127
Nike, 13, 37, 176
Obama, Barack, 148
Obama, Malia and Sasha, 86
OfficeMax, 129
Ouija boards, 49
Oz, Frank, 39
Packaging Girlhood (Lamb and Brown), 151–52, 187
“Painted Babies” (BBC documentary), 94
Palin, Sarah, 148–49
Paoletti, Jo, 35
Paper Bag Princess, The (Munsch and Martchenko), 101
Parente, Carol-Lynn, 40
parents:
advice on curtailing body image issues for, 137, 141, 142–43, 186
of beauty pageant contestants, 74–76, 78–82, 85, 90–91
princess culture as viewed by, 19–21, 22–23, 24
in protecting girlhood innocence, 6, 24, 25, 26, 32, 52, 85–88, 114, 119, 125
in protecting girls from media and marketing influence, 182–87, 192
and safer and responsible Internet use, 163, 174–78
undue restrictions by, 186, 191–92
Perrault, Charles, 103
Pilkington, Alexis, 169, 172–73
pink-and-pretty trend, 4, 6, 32, 33–36, 38–45, 51, 52, 61, 83, 136, 144, 152, 181
in board games, 7, 34, 49–50, 152
in fictional female characters
and role models, 39–43, 47–48
innocence symbolized in, 34, 49, 52, 125
as marketing strategy, 35–36, 38, 40, 41–43, 52, 155
narcissism and materialism in, 42, 46, 48, 49–50
in toys and merchandise, 33–35, 38–39, 40–43, 44, 47–48, 49–50, 98, 152
Pink Brain, Blue Brain (Eliot), 59
Pink Yahtzee, 49
Pixar Animation Studios, 188–90
play, 145–46, 158, 161–62, 185
gender segregation in, 50, 66, 67–70, 72, 156–57
violent themes in, 96–98, 99, 102
Pocahontas, 14, 31, 124
Pop (pseudonym), 56–58, 63
Portfolio, 118
Power Rangers, 16
preschool girls, 2–4, 5, 37, 58, 142
beauty pageants for, 73–82, 85, 89, 90, 93–94, 125
cosmetics targeted to, 7, 52, 84, 85
premature sexualization of, 75, 76, 79, 85–86
princess culture of, 3–6, 18–21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 61–62, 64, 124, 186
toys targeted to, 3, 34, 38, 51, 86–88
“pre-tween” girls, 38
beauty pageants for, 73–82, 89–94, 125
cosmetics marketed to, 42, 82, 83–84, 91
materialistic and narcissistic values marketed to, 16, 23, 30, 32, 42, 46, 48, 49–50, 83, 88, 104, 155, 156, 161–62
online sites aimed at, 161–62, 164
premature sexualization of, 75, 78, 79, 91, 123, 125, 183
see also preschool girls; “tween” girls
Prince, Phoebe, 169, 172–73
Princess and the Frog, The, 179, 180–82, 189–90
princess culture, 3–6, 8, 13–16, 18–21, 22–25, 26, 41, 58, 64, 75, 83, 96, 99, 101, 115, 124, 138, 143–44, 150, 153, 155, 186, 187–92
Disney’s marketing of, 13–15, 16, 23, 24, 26, 36, 104, 116, 125, 182, 189–90
first mainstream African-American character in, 15, 179–82, 189–90
materialistic values in, 16, 23
mothers’ perspectives on, 19–21, 22–23, 24
movies in, 104, 107, 179–82, 187–90
as protecting girls’ innocence, 6, 24, 25, 32, 49, 81, 114, 119, 125
rescue fantasies and landing Prince Charming emphasized in, 4, 6, 12, 14, 16, 20, 23, 111, 144, 180, 182
toys and merchandise of, 15–16, 26, 33–34, 35, 48, 61–62, 85, 182, 186, 190
see also fairy tales
Princess Smartypants (Cole), 101
Psychology of Sex Differences, The (Maccoby and Jacklin), 206
Pussycat Dolls, 83, 119
Ramona and Beezus, 128
Ramsey, JonBenét, 72, 90
Rapunzel, 102
“Rapunzel” (Brothers Grimm), 190–92
Reimer, David, 57, 65
Riot Grrrl movement, 153, 154, 155, 218n
“Robber Bridegroom, The” (Brothers Grimm), 108
Rolling Stone, 122
Roosevelt, Franklin, 25
Roosevelt, Theodore, 45
Rowland, Pleasant, 28, 32
“Rumpelstiltskin” (Brothers Grimm), 105–6
Saks Fifth Avenue, 27, 32, 83
Salon, 111
same-sex play, 67–69
Sanford Harmony Program, 66–67, 71–72, 158
Sax, Leonard, 70, 71
Scholastic, 156
Schoolgirls (Orenstein), 140–41
Scrabble, 7, 152
self-esteem, 6, 16, 22, 76, 137, 138, 175, 215n
Sesame Street, 39–41
Sesame Workshop, 40–41
“sexting,” 170, 172
sexuality, female, 7, 8, 85, 112, 121–24, 129–31, 167
detachment in, 6–7, 16, 85, 121, 123–24, 171–72
objectification and performance in, 6–7, 8, 76, 85, 123–124, 129–130, 167, 171–172, 183, 195n, 221n; see also sexualization, female
in toys marketed to children, 47, 48–49, 84, 85–88, 91
sexualization, female, 8, 75, 76, 121–22, 129, 167, 195n–96n
femininity equated with, 112, 125, 130, 134, 167, 183
mental health and, 6, 16, 76, 85, 137, 138, 196n
of superheroines, 144–45
of women in power, 149
of young female celebrities, 113–15, 120–24, 125, 126–28, 129–31, 221n
sexualization, premature, 75, 76, 84–86, 91, 171, 184, 215n
detached sexuality as result of, 6–7, 16, 85, 123–24, 129–30, 171–72
digital media and, 167–68, 170–71, 172
fashion and, 86, 91, 123, 125
female celebrities and, 113–15, 123, 124–25, 221n
mainstream media’s role in, 86, 113–14, 123, 124, 125, 167, 183, 184
princess and pink culture in protecting from, 6, 24–25, 32, 52, 81
sibling effect, 64–65
“Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It),” 86
“Six Swans, The” (Brothers Grimm), 108–9
Sleeping Beauty, 5, 14, 23, 24, 36, 62, 102, 115, 144, 162
Snow Queen, The (Andersen), 190
Snow White, 3, 12, 14, 15, 16, 20, 21, 23, 115, 120
“Snow White” (Brothers Grimm), 100
social networking sites, 159, 161, 163, 164–70, 182
cyberbullying on, 168–70, 172–73, 174, 175, 177
for “tweens,” 174–78
Sonny with a Chance, 128
Sophie (ten-year-old girl), 27, 31–32
Spears, Britney, 115, 121–23, 127, 129, 130, 153
Spears, Jamie Lynn, 127
Spice Girls, 153–55
Spider-Woman, 144
Spinning Straw into Gold (Gould), 105
Steiner-Adair, Catherine, 142
stereotypes, gender, 63–64, 97, 146–47, 198n
in mainstream media, 16–17, 91, 147–48, 150, 155, 202n–3n
Steven (author’s husband), 2, 15, 88, 97, 99
Stewart, Kristen, 112
suicide, 18, 169, 172–73
Supergirl, 144–45
superheroines, 144–46, 148, 150, 158
Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story, 46
Talking Elmo, 51
Tangled, 190
Target, 42, 88
teenage girls, 122, 137–41, 166, 167, 183, 192, 215n
body image issues and self-loathing in, 6, 18, 137, 139, 141
cyberbullying of, 168–70, 172–73, 174, 219n–20n
depression in, 16, 18, 172
detached sexuality in, 6–7, 16, 123, 171–72
Internet use of, 162–71, 172–73, 219n–20n
premature sexualization of, 6–7, 16, 113–15, 123–24, 130, 167–68, 170–72, 183, 215n, 221n
suicide and, 18, 169, 172–73
Teen Choice Awards, 127
television, 50, 91, 100, 144, 186, 187
commercials on, 27, 98, 202n–3n, 221n
for tweens and pretweens, 116–20, 127, 128–29, 130
Temple, Shirley, 25–26, 79, 119–20
text messaging, 161, 169
sexually suggestive, 170–71, 172
That’s So Raven, 117
Thelma & Louise, 101
Thirty Ways of Looking at Hillary (Moore), 148, 217n
Tiana (char.), 15, 180–81, 190
Tinker Bell, 14, 144
TinkerToys, 7, 38, 45
toddlers, 5, 36–37, 38, 39, 95, 116, 192
Toddlers & Tiaras, 75, 77, 89
Tolman, Deborah, 6–7, 171–72
“tomboys,” 66–67
Tonka, 38, 57, 202n
Toy Fair (Jacob Javits Center), 33–35, 51, 53
toys and merchandise, 13, 15–16, 20, 26–32, 45–52, 57, 95–96, 144, 155, 180, 184, 185
Barbie line of, 7, 15, 28, 39, 42, 44, 45–48, 49, 50, 63, 84, 88, 97
board games, 7, 34, 49–50, 152
Bratz line of, 48–49, 50, 51, 84, 86, 91, 153, 155
of fake guns, 96–98, 99, 102
gender and inborn preferences in, 57, 62–64, 68
gender color coding of, 7, 21, 35, 38–39, 43, 50, 51, 63, 152
as gender role propaganda, 44–45, 52
gender segmentation of, 3, 7, 21–22, 38–39, 43, 45, 50, 51–52, 63, 70, 97, 98–99, 198n
materialistic and narcissistic values in, 32, 42, 46, 48, 48–51, 88, 155
pink-and-pretty trend in, 33–35, 38–39, 40–43, 44, 47–48, 49–50, 51, 152
for preschool girls, 3, 34, 38, 51, 86–88
princess culture of, 15, 26, 33–34, 35, 48, 61–62, 182, 186, 190
“sexiness” and “cool” marketed in, 47, 48–49, 50, 52, 85–88, 91
Ty Girlz line of, 86–88, 155, 161, 182
Toys “R” Us, 8, 39, 118
Toy Story, 39, 189
Triple Bind, The (Hinshaw), 84–85
“tween” girls, 5, 135, 183
beauty products marketed to, 29, 37, 42, 82, 83, 156
celebrity role-models marketed to, 113–31
clothing marketed to, 82, 91, 125
elastic age span in categorization of, 37, 42
materialistic values marketed to, 30, 49–50, 83, 117, 155, 156
premature sexualization of, 6, 7, 84–86, 91, 123, 125
social networking site for, 174–78
see also “pre-tween” girls
Twenge, Jean, 215n
Twilight series (Meyer), 6, 109–12, 182, 211n
Twitter, 24, 166
Ty Girlz, 86–88, 155, 161, 182
Universal Royalty Texas State Beauty Pageant, 73–75, 76–78, 79–80, 89–91, 92–94
Up, 189
Uses of Enchantment, The (Bettelheim), 100
Vanity Fair, 114, 115, 121, 127, 130
Verna (African-American mother), 180
Viacom, 15
violence:
in fairy tales, 100, 102–3, 105, 106–9, 191–92
in media, 98, 186
in play, 96–98, 99–100
Vogue, 149
Wall Street Journal, The, 129
Walmart, 86, 119, 124
Walters, Barbara, 127
War Play Dilemma, The (Levin), 98
Washington Post, The, 148
Webkinz.com, 173
What Kids Buy and Why (Acuff and Reiher), 37
“What’s Wrong with Cinderella?” (Orenstein), 4–5
Why Gender Matters (Sax), 70
Whyville, 159–60, 176
Winfrey, Oprah, 126, 181
Wizard of Oz, The, 120
Wizards of Waverly Place, 128–29
Wolkstein, Diane, 109
Wonder Woman, 144, 145–46, 148, 150, 158
Wonder World Tour, 124, 125–26, 130–31
Wood, Eden, 78, 79, 89, 90, 92
Wood, Mickie, 78, 90
World War II, 100
“X: A Fabulous Child’s Story,” 55–56
Yeh-Shen, 103
YouTube, 46, 144, 161, 169
Zoe (Muppet), 40
About the Author
Peggy Orenstein is the author of the New York Times bestselling memoir Waiting for Daisy: A Tale of Two Continents, Three Religions, Five Infertility Doctors, an Oscar, an Atomic Bomb, a Romantic Night and One Woman’s Quest to Become a Mother; Schoolgirls: Young Women, Self-Esteem and the Confidence Gap; and Flux: Women on Sex, Work, Love, Kids and Life in a Half-Changed World. She is a contributing writer to The New York Times Magazine. Her work has also appeared in the Los Angeles Times, USA Today, Vogue, Elle, Parenting, O: The Oprah Magazine, More, Discover, Salon, and The New Yorker, and she contributes commentaries to NPR’s All Things Considered. She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband and their daughter, Daisy. Visit her Web site at www.peggyorenstein.com; you can follow her on Twitter @peggyorenstein.
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Also by Peggy Orenstein
Waiting for Daisy: A Tale of Two Continents, Three Religions, Five Infertility Doctors, an Oscar, an Atomic Bomb, a Romantic Night, and One Woman’s Quest to Become a Mother
Flux: Women on Sex, Work, Love, Kids, and Life in a Half-Changed World
Schoolgirls: Young Women, Self-Esteem, and the Confidence Gap
Copyright
CINDERELLA ATE MY DAUGHTER. Copyright © 2011 by Peggy Orenstein. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
FIRST EDITION
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Orenstein, Peggy.
Cinderella ate my daughter : dispatches from
the front lines of the new girlie-girl culture / Peggy Orenstein. — 1st ed.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 978-0-06-171152-7
EPub Edition © 2011 ISBN: 9780062041630
1. Girls—Psychology. 2. Femininity. 3. Mothers and daughters. I. Title.
HQ777.O74 2011
305.23082—dc22
2010028724
11 12 13 14 15 ID/RRD 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
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