Falling for Mr. Mysterious

by Barbara Hannay

  Conscious that he was watching her every movement, she sat on the stairs, took off her black boots and tried on the ones belonging to his girlfriend.

  She reserved judgement until she’d tied up the laces and was standing, wriggling her toes. ‘They feel fine.’ She took a few steps. ‘They’re a good fit, actually.’

  She sent him a surprised smile and Jude smiled back. It was their first shared smile since she’d arrived and it made her feel much happier than it should have.

  But then she remembered the boots’ owner. Obviously, Jude and this Keira were still quite close, and for a fanciful moment Emily imagined the boots were beginning to pinch her.

  But they were fine, really, an uncannily good fit—and the hike wasn’t long or particularly demanding. Although it was rather dark inside the rainforest and there was the occasional slippery patch on the track, the undergrowth wasn’t thick, so, apart from dodging buttress roots and the occasional wait-a-while vine, it was fairly easy-going.

  Jude made it look easy, of course, and Emily suspected that he’d slowed down for her. If there was a rocky creek to be crossed, or a mossy log to clamber over, he was always ready with a strong hand to help her. She wished she didn’t enjoy those brief moments of contact quite so much.

  Even discounting the pleasure of Jude’s company, she genuinely enjoyed the hike. As a former dancer, she was fit and she loved any form of physical exercise that didn’t involve throwing or catching a ball. And who didn’t love a rainforest? Beauty abounded every step of the way, and always in the background there was the music of endless bird calls. Looking up, she was rewarded by bright glimpses of blue sky or golden sunlight streaming through the dense green canopy.

  As they neared the top, the thick forest gradually opened out into sparser eucalypt trees, and then finally they were on a ridge.

  Emily stood, breathing in the pure, clean mountain air. She opened her mouth to speak, but then she changed her mind as she realised that wow was totally inadequate. In fact, there wasn’t any word she could think of that would do justice to this spectacular view to the west, with descending mountains and ridges as far as the eye could see.

  After a bit, she said simply, ‘Thanks for letting me come, Jude.’

  He smiled, and there was a heart-stopping softness in his eyes that made her feel, in that moment, that they might have been the only two people on the planet.

  ‘There’s a seat along here.’ His voice brought her back to earth and she followed him along the ridge till they reached a shelf of rock.

  Indeed it made a very comfortable seat, smooth and warmed by the sun, with another smooth rock wall behind it forming a backrest.

  ‘Definitely dress-circle seats for a sunset,’ she said, looking out at the sky, already growing pink in the west, while a pair of huge wedge-tailed eagles circled and rolled on the air currents above the valley.

  Jude handed her a water bottle and they sat quenching their thirst and taking in the spectacle. Emily asked him about his climbing experiences and he told her about his skyliner friends—fellow bush-walkers who added an extra challenge to their hiking by not sticking to the easy routes.

  ‘We follow the tops of the ridges,’ he explained. ‘Any obstacles like gorges and fast-running mountain streams or cliff faces are simply part of the fun.’

  She thought it was a very fitting activity for a somewhat reclusive thriller writer. The more she discovered about Jude, the more she was fascinated by him, and she was surprised that at least one of his former girlfriends hadn’t been tempted into adjusting her lifestyle to blend more easily with his.

  Or hadn’t that been an option?

  Then she forgot about his social life as the sun began to bleed liquid colour across the western sky. They stopped talking and simply watched in hushed awe as the heavens were stained with pink and orange deepening to crimson, and clouds were rimmed with bright shimmering gold.

  It was so beautiful, they watched until the light began to fade. Emily stole a glance in Jude’s direction, wondering if they should leave before it got too dark. Then she saw how unbearably sad he looked.

  It was the same lost look she’d seen when he was watching the heron.

  Perhaps worse. Such a depth of despair that she was shocked to the soles of her borrowed boots.

  She wasn’t sure if he was in pain again, or if he was worrying about his future. And then—oh, God—she almost fell off the rock as a worse thought struck. Had the doctors given him really terrible news?

  ‘Jude,’ she said softly. ‘Are you OK?’

  He blinked and the sadness evaporated. ‘I’m fine,’ he said. ‘Why?’

  ‘You were looking a bit grim.’ She tried to make her voice light.

  He sighed, then let out a soft chuckle. ‘One way or another, you’re going to get it out of me, aren’t you?’

  ‘Only if you really want to tell me.’ She hugged her knees. ‘I know we only met a week ago, but I think we’ve become pretty good friends in that short time. I know you’ve really helped me, and I’d like to think that I could be there for you, if you needed a friend.’

  His gaze was fixed on the water bottle he was holding. ‘I do appreciate your concern, Emily.’ He continued to stare at the bottle, then he closed its lid with an emphatic snap, and took a deep breath as if he’d made a decision.

  ‘I have to have an operation,’ he told her flatly. ‘There’s a benign tumour pressing on my optic nerve, so there’s a chance that I may lose my sight.’

  No.

  Oh, God, no.

  Never in her wildest dreams had Emily imagined anything this awful.

  Her throat was choked by a knot of pain. Her eyes stung. She wanted to cry—except that crying was the very worst thing she could do in front of Jude. He’d probably held back from telling her because he didn’t want a sobfest making everything worse.

  Jude…might go blind.

  How truly frightening for him.

  Suddenly, the more puzzling aspects of his recent behaviour began to make sense—the trips to the art galleries, and those unexpected moments when he’d stopped and simply stared at a tree or a bird—and now, at this sunset.

  He’d been trying to capture those images, to hold them in his memory. All this time he’d been dealing with the terrifying prospect of blindness, and yet he’d said nothing to her. Instead, he’d listened to her silly problems with an ex-boyfriend and offered her comfort.

  Oh, Jude…

  Emily had never felt such a storm of emotions. Her desire to be careful was drowned by the overwhelming force of her feelings. All of which centred on Jude. Feelings deep and profound, and more genuine than anything she’d felt before.

  She wanted to take him into her arms, to hold him against her heart. Wanted to be with him. For him. In any way he wanted.

  Gulping back her tears, she slipped an arm around his shoulders. ‘I’m sure there’s a very good chance that everything will be fine.’

  ‘Yeah. I’m thinking positively.’ He gave her hand a squeeze. ‘But this will get you into trouble.’

  ‘Trouble?’

  ‘Or it will get me into trouble.’ He slanted her a smile. ‘Just warning you. If you stay this close, I’ll end up kissing you.’

  Emily felt a jolt so strong she almost flew off the mountaintop. In this setting…with the sunset and the emotional wallop of his sad news…a kiss had never felt more necessary.

  ‘If you do kiss me, I promise not to hit you.’

  To her relief, Jude didn’t stop to ask for further clarification. He gathered her in and the next moment they were kissing. They simply flowed together, as if their bodies had minds of their own. As if this was meant to happen.

  She’d never known a kiss quite like it, hadn’t known a kiss could be so
moving. So sad. So blistering and sweet and healing. So full of heart and soul. Earthy, and filled with hungry need. She wound her arms around Jude’s neck, needing to press closer, craving contact with every inch of him. Her insides caught fire, and she might have burned to ashes in his arms.

  He suddenly went very still.

  She heard him draw a deep shuddering breath.

  ‘Oh, God, Emily.’ He was breathing rapidly. ‘This is crazy. I’m so sorry.’

  ‘I’m not.’

  ‘Emily.’ Her name was uttered softly—half rebuke, half prayer.

  ‘Don’t start talking about mistakes, Jude. It was an emotional moment.’ Life-changing.

  ‘No doubt about that.’ He touched her cheek just once, then pulled his hand away quickly. ‘But this is my problem. You mustn’t get too involved.’

  Too late. I’m involved. So deeply it’s scary.

  Already Jude was reaching for the backpack, and his face was hidden in the gathering darkness. ‘There’s always going to be temptation when a man and a woman are alone, but this is the very worst time for either of us to get involved.’

  So sensible. Now he sounded like a parent.

  Worse…he was right. He was about to undergo surgery, touch-and-go surgery with potentially disastrous results. And Emily had made so many mistakes with men she ought to know better. She certainly shouldn’t have made a rule about no kissing and then promptly broken it.

  But wasn’t this also a time when Jude really needed a caring and loving someone in his life?

  ‘I hope you’ll at least allow me to be a friend,’ she said, flashing a brave smile. ‘If nothing else, I could be Alex’s stand-in.’

  He looked at her for the longest time, as if he was giving this serious thought. But all he said was, ‘We should be getting back.’

  True. It was getting darker and colder by the minute, and this was neither the time nor the place to try to persuade Jude that he needed her, especially when she’d come to the mountains uninvited and invaded his privacy.

  ‘Will we be able to find our way back to the house in the dark?’

  ‘Sure.’ From his pack, Jude produced little torches for them to strap around their heads, rather like miners’ lights. As they set off, the narrow beams proved wonderfully effective, leaving their hands free to push vines out of the way, or for Jude to take Emily’s hand to help her over rough bits, which he needed to do frequently.

  The constant contact didn’t help her to calm down.

  * * *

  It was quite cold by the time they reached the house and Jude was pleased to hurry inside and busy himself with lighting the fire, while Emily reheated her chicken dish. In no time the flames were crackling in the grate and the rich aroma of lemon-infused chicken and potatoes was wafting from the oven.

  Jude drew the curtains, making the dark forest retreat, and the house became warm and cosy. And intimate. Dangerously so.

  Obviously he had very poor self-control when Emily was around. The merest glimpse of her set his heart leaping. He wanted to stare and stare at her. To touch. And to taste her. Wanted to lose himself in her.

  He’d almost kissed her senseless on the mountain this evening. It was a miracle he’d found the strength to pull back. If only he hadn’t weakened and invited her to stay here overnight. They needed the no kissing rule more than ever now.

  He didn’t want his name added to the list of men who’d hurt her.

  * * *

  Apart from enjoying the Greek chicken, Jude seemed rather distracted. After dinner, when he and Emily sat on the sofa in front of the fire, he was careful to keep his distance.

  And a very good thing, too. Emily knew she’d been carried away by the sunset and the flood of emotions that had come with hearing Jude’s diagnosis. Now that she was calmer, she knew he’d been sensible to re-establish their boundaries. Friendships were so much clearer and safer than romantic entanglements.

  If they stuck to friendship, hearts wouldn’t be broken, lives wouldn’t be turned upside down and everyone would remain happy. It was actually a relief to have this sorted in her head.

  It left her free to concentrate on practical considerations, like Jude’s impending trip to hospital.

  ‘Who’s going to look after you, after you leave hospital?’ she asked him now. ‘Do you have family you can call on? Are your parents still alive?’

  ‘My folks were both killed in a plane crash in China ten years ago.’

  ‘Gosh. How awful.’

  ‘It was terrible,’ Jude agreed. ‘But in some ways I think my father wouldn’t have minded going quickly like that. He couldn’t stand being ill. Saw it as a character flaw. I know he would have hated growing weak or decrepit with old age.’

  A log on the fire made a loud popping sound, and Emily watched a little spray of sparks as she digested what Jude had just told her. Perhaps his father’s attitude explained why Jude was so stoical about his condition.

  ‘Is there anyone else in your family?’

  ‘My sister, Charlotte, in Sydney.’ As soon as he mentioned her name his face softened. ‘I’ve told her what’s happening, of course, and she wants to help, but she has three young children, so I don’t think she’ll be able to get away for long.’

  ‘So you—’

  ‘I have plenty of friends. But I don’t expect I’ll need help. I’m sure I’ll be fine.’

  ‘It’s such a pity Alex is away. He’s never happier than when he’s looking after someone.’

  Jude smiled. ‘That’s why he’s such a great agent.’

  ‘You’ll let me help, won’t you?’

  His smile faded. ‘I’d rather you didn’t.’

  ‘Why?’ It was impossible to keep the hurt from her voice.

  ‘I’d rather get through this on my own.’

  She bit down hard on her lip to stop herself from pleading. After all, a girl had her pride.

  Quickly, she changed the subject. ‘This must be the worst part—waiting for it all to be over.’

  ‘If Alex had his way, I would have kept busy working—writing right up until they wheeled me into Theatre.’

  She sent an eye-rolling smile towards the ceiling. ‘This is one occasion where I can’t agree with Alex.’

  ‘So how do you think I should be spending my time?’

  ‘Doing exactly what you’ve been doing. Seeking out your favourite sights, storing up memories.’

  Jude’s eyes widened. ‘You’ve seen through my scheme?’

  ‘Well…I assume you’ve been taking another look at your favourite things, like the art galleries and that heron in the park, and the sunset.’ She hurried to add, ‘Not that I think you’ll need the memories, Jude. I’m sure you’re going to be fine, but it’s like having—’ She paused, hunting for words.

  ‘An insurance policy?’

  ‘Exactly. Or backup for your computer.’

  She wondered if Jude had included pretty women on his list of favourite things. But it wasn’t a question she could ask, especially now, when his smile morphed into thin-lipped grimness and he kept his gaze fixed on the fire.

  * * *

  At midnight, Jude lay alone in the dark with his eyes closed, thinking about Emily.

  Emily, Emily, Emily…

  She was becoming a dangerous obsession.

  He let his mind drift back to the first time he’d seen her when he’d opened the door to Alex’s apartment and he’d found her standing there, dressed in her lovely white coat and long, sexy boots. Her bright red hair had tumbled about her shoulders like a fiery river and her blue eyes had sparkled and he’d forgotten how to breathe.

  Her loveliness eclipsed any masterpiece in an art gallery, was more exciting than any magnificent su
nset. And this evening when he’d kissed her he’d been consumed by disastrous longing.

  Now, the longing wouldn’t leave him. Emily was lying in another room, mere metres away, and he was torturing himself with fantasies of going to her.

  He couldn’t.

  He mustn’t.

  He had too many freaking question marks hanging over his future.

  * * *

  They drove back to Brisbane in separate vehicles. Emily had offered to drive Jude in her hire care because she was worried he might develop a headache on the way down the mountain, but he’d politely refused and she knew she’d offended his masculine pride. She played the radio the whole way to distract herself from worrying.

  As soon as they were back at the apartment, he promptly told her he was heading out. ‘Just grabbing a few things for the hospital stay,’ he called over his shoulder.

  ‘Don’t forget to put pyjamas on your shopping list.’

  He turned back to her. ‘Pyjamas?’

  ‘Sleepwear, Jude. A two-piece garment. Top and bottom, usually matching.’

  ‘Why are you suddenly worried about my sleepwear?’

  His amused and glittering gaze held her trapped, and she had to swallow before she could answer.

  ‘I’m not normally interested in what you wear to bed.’ Liar. ‘But I thought your holey T-shirts might frighten the nurses.’

  He responded with a huffing sigh. ‘Of course. Thanks for reminding me.’

  After Jude had gone, Emily rang Granny Silver. She just had to talk to someone, and she knew her grandmother wasn’t a gossip.

  ‘Darling,’ her granny soothed. ‘I’m so sorry to hear such bad news, but the doctors are so clever these days. I’m sure Jude will be fine.’

  ‘I know. I keep telling myself that. I just wish I was like you or Alex. You’re so good at helping people in difficult times.’

  There was an unexpected chuckle on the end of the line.

  ‘What’s so funny?’

  ‘I’m sure Jude would much rather have your company, than either mine or Alex’s.’

  ‘I’ve already told you, Granny. Jude and I are just friends. Quite new friends at that.’ Emily had been working hard to remind herself of this, and it helped to say it out loud.