Thirty and a Half Excuses

by Denise Grover Swank

  “So you funded the nursery.”

  I nodded. “But my uncle set my finances up so that I can only take out chunks at a time. After I buy this truck, I’ll have used up my allotment for the next several years.”

  “How are you dealing with all of that information? Finding out your mother wasn’t your birth mother?”

  “Honestly, I try not to think about it.”

  “Rose.” Mason’s voice was low and serious. “You can’t push this out of your head. What you discovered was earth-shattering. Life-changing. You have to face that and deal with it before you can move on with your life.”

  I gaped at him. He was the first person to ever suggest such a thing. Everyone else seemed okay with me sweeping it under the rug. And by everyone, I meant Violet and Joe. But when we found out, Violet had been terrified that I’d no longer think of myself as her sister, even though we’d been raised together and we shared a father. And Joe, maybe Joe never thought I needed to deal with it because he seemed to be running from his own past.

  But the problem was that I could see the truth in Mason’s words. I knew I had to face the truth and wrestle with what it really meant. I just wasn’t ready to do it yet.

  “I know,” I finally said. “I just don’t have the first clue how to go about it.”

  “I can only share my own personal experience, but at first, I tried to pretend the bad thing in my life had never happened. Eventually I realized that I could ignore it all I wanted, but it didn’t make it any less true. All it did was leave a festering wound that would never heal. I started letting myself absorb it in bits and pieces. And after a while, once I got used to it, it was easier to deal with. I can never accept it, but I’m learning to live with it.”

  I couldn’t believe he was sharing so much of himself with me. Sure, he still hadn’t told me what exactly had happened, but this was just as important. “Thank you.”

  His eyes widened in surprise. “For what?”

  “For sharing something so personal with me.”

  He was silent for a moment, and then he offered me a soft smile. “I hadn’t intended to, but then you never intended to share something so personal with me either. It felt right.” He paused. “Would you ever have told me about your visions on your own?”

  “Don’t take it personally, Mason. You have to understand that I’ve told very few people, and most people haven’t responded very well. I didn’t want to lose you as a friend.”

  “Joe knows?”

  “Of course. I told him during the whole Crocker mess. And Neely Kate guessed after I told her that her flower girl was gonna come down with chicken pox.”

  “You’ve been friends with Neely Kate for years, and you just told her recently?”

  “No. Neely Kate and I only met on the jury.”

  “You two are so close… I just assumed you’d known each other forever.”

  I shrugged. “I know, but sometimes you meet someone and you just know they’re perfect for you, you know?”

  “Yeah, I do.” A wistful look crossed his face before he turned to look out the passenger window. He was silent for a moment. “So the visions really just come to you?”

  I squirmed in my seat. “Yeah.”

  Mason sat up straighter. “If you don’t want to talk about—”

  I shook my head. “No, it’s fine. I’m just not used to talking about it.”

  “How often do you get them?”

  “Several times a day.”

  “And you can’t control it?”

  “I wish to God I could. Especially since I automatically blurt out what I’ve seen.”

  “Do you ever try to have a vision?”

  I resisted the urge to sigh. “I’ve only tried twice. The first time Joe asked me to, and I saw him dead. But that was good because I knew what to do to stop it from happening.”

  “And the second?”

  “Neely Kate’s wedding. It was a good vision. I don’t have many of those. But it was the best vision I ever had.”

  “Why was it so special?”

  “I don’t know.” I paused. “Maybe because I just let it happen without being anxious about it, so it was longer than usual. And it was filled with happiness. Neely Kate walked down the aisle, and she was bursting with joy.” I turned to him. “That was the first time I ever felt overwhelming emotion in a vision. I’m glad it was a good one.”

  “Do you have bad ones very often?”

  The worry in his voice caught me by surprise. “No, not really. When I was younger, I saw upsetting things, but nothing really bad, like someone cheating on his wife or my momma losing the blue ribbon at the county fair for her pie. The first time I ever saw something really bad was when Daniel Crocker came into the DMV last May. And that was the first time I saw a vision about myself. I was sitting on my momma’s sofa with my head bashed in and blood everywhere. When I saw it, I passed out at my desk from shock.”

  “I can’t even imagine how frightening that must have been.”

  My throat burned at the memory of that day, but I swallowed to clear it. “I didn’t know what to do or who to tell. I just waited for it to happen. And then it happened to Momma instead.”

  “You just waited for Daniel Crocker to murder you? Why didn’t you tell the police?”

  “What was I going to tell them? They would have never believed me.”

  We were silent for several moments before Mason spoke. “Do you ever talk about what happened? With Joe or your sister?”

  I tensed, feeling defensive. Violet didn’t want to hear it, and I didn’t want to worry Joe. “No.”

  Mason sighed. “Rose, you can’t let these scary things happen to you without talking about it.”

  “There’s no one to talk to about it, Mason. I’ll just upset or worry everyone, and a psychologist would think I was crazy.”

  “You can tell me.”

  I pinched my mouth, unsure of whether it was a good idea.

  “Why don’t you tell Joe?”

  I turned to him for a moment. “I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. It’s not that Joe doesn’t want to hear it.”

  “But does he ever ask?”

  I hesitated. “No.”

  “I’m not judging him or you. That’s exactly how a lot of people handle traumatic situations, but we’re friends, and as your friend, I think you should talk about it. And I’m volunteering to listen whenever you’re ready.”

  “I’ll think about it.”

  “Thank you.” His voice hardened. “But if you ever have a vision in which you see yourself physically harmed, I want you to call me immediately.”

  “Mason…”

  “Rose, I’m the assistant DA. I have the power to protect you.”

  “Not without proof.”

  “Just promise you’ll tell me, and I’ll sort out the rest.”

  “Okay.”

  I pulled into David Moore’s uncle’s used car lot. There were a lot of clunkers and a few newer cars and trucks. A sign reading Henryetta Moore for Less Used Car Lot leaned to one side, threatening to topple over onto the road. Mason and I stayed in my car, staring out through the windshield.

  “I should have asked you if you had any idea what kind of truck you want or how much you want to spend.”

  “I have no idea what kind of truck. And price? I know I want something reliable. I don’t want something that’s going to break down all the time.”

  “Then this might not be the place to get a truck.” He pushed open his car door. “But let’s check it out. If we don’t see anything, we’ll drive to Magnolia.”

  “Okay.”

  A short man with a large belly waddled out of the small building. Back in the day, this lot was a gas station. It had been converted to a used car lot about ten years ago.

  “Can I help you young folks?” the salesman asked, wiping his hands on his jeans and smearing orange powder down his legs. There were still chip crumbs on his chin. “You two look like you’re in the market for a n
ice sedan.” His eyes lit up as he cocked his head to the side. “Or maybe a minivan? Getting ready to start a family?”

  I looked down at my stomach. Was he insinuating that I looked pregnant?

  “No, actually,” Mason said. “We’re looking for a pickup truck.”

  “Ho boy!” the guy said. “So we’re shopping for the man of the household today. Just brought the wife along to keep you company, aye?”

  I expected Mason to correct the guy, and he did, but not about our relationship. “The truck is for the lady.”

  “Oh.”

  It wasn’t unusual for women to drive pickups in Fenton County, but they usually owned farms.

  He extended his hand and Mason shook it. “I’m Earl.”

  “Mason.”

  I shook Earl’s hand next. “I’m Rose.”

  “Can I just say that you two make a really cute couple?” Earl grinned.

  A blush rose to my cheeks. “Actually, we’re—”

  “Looking for truck that has working air conditioning. Also it has to have less than sixty thousand miles.” Mason turned to me. “Do you care if it has stick shift?”

  “Uh…”

  “Do you know how to drive one?”

  “No.”

  He turned back to Earl. “We won’t discount a truck with stick shift at the moment, but we’d prefer an automatic.”

  Earl led us to the section where the trucks were parked, and I glanced up at Mason with confusion.

  Trust me, he mouthed.

  Turned out I was trusting Mason Deveraux with lots of things.

  Chapter Eleven

  It also turned out that Mason knew what he was doing. Between what he knew about trucks and what he learned on the Internet browser on his phone, he decided a Ford F150 with a backseat and a longer truck bed was my best option on the lot.

  When I gave my driver’s license to Earl so that we could take it for a test drive, Mason handed his over too. As Earl was writing his name in a binder, Mason said, “That’s Mason Deveraux III, the assistant district attorney.”

  Earl looked up, wide-eyed, before glancing at the papers again, his hand shaking as he finished writing.

  Mason winked at me.

  Earl let us take the truck on a test drive alone, saying he was supposed to go with us, but if he couldn’t trust the assistant DA, who could he trust?

  Mason chuckled as we walked over to the vehicle. “I bet he’s in there hiding all evidence of his illegal activities while we’re on this test drive.”

  “Why would you let him get away with that?”

  “No harm in putting the fear of God into him. Besides, you never know. This incident might scare him straight.”

  “Do you really think so?” I asked.

  We reached the back of the truck, and Mason tossed the keys to me. “Nah, but hope springs eternal. Contrary to popular belief, it is not my goal to put half of Fenton County behind bars.”

  I got behind the wheel, nervous to be driving something so big. Maybe Violet was right. Maybe it would be ridiculous for me to buy a truck.

  “Oh, no you don’t.” Mason said, buckling his seat belt.

  I turned to him in surprise.

  “I know what you’re thinking, and your sister is wrong. There is no reason on earth you can’t drive this truck. In fact, I won’t let you out until you drive it around Henryetta.”

  I laughed. “You think you can keep me in here until I drive it?”

  “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m probably the most stubborn man in southern Arkansas. You’re driving this truck. You may decide you don’t want to buy it, and I’m fine with that, as long as it’s not for the wrong reason.”

  “And what’s the wrong reason?”

  “Fear. It’s okay to be frightened trying something new, but don’t let fear stop you from living your life.”

  Fear had been my enemy for my entire life, and although I’d vowed not to let it stop me anymore, I realized that was exactly what was happening right now. “You’re right.”

  Mason’s face lit up with a smug smile. “About damn time someone admitted it, now drive.”

  I pulled out of the parking lot, terrified that I was going to run over a mailbox or small car, but once I got on the road and got the feel of driving the pickup, I not only got used to it but liked it.

  “Well?” Mason asked after we’d driven around Henryetta and were on our way back to the car lot. “What do you think?”

  “I think I like driving a truck.”

  “You look good driving it too.”

  “You’re just saying that.”

  He laughed. “You’d probably look good driving just about anything.”

  I cast a sideways glance at Mason, looking at him in a new light. Did Mason like me as more than a friend? If he did, I knew I shouldn’t lead him on, but I really valued his friendship. Selfish or not, I wasn’t willing to give that up. Besides, I was probably imagining things. Violet was right. I was terrible at this kind of thing.

  After I parked in the lot, Mason stopped me as I was about to get out. “Do you want me to see what kind of deal I can get you for this truck or do you want to think about it?”

  I shook my head. “I’m not sure what there is to think about. I need a truck. I like this one. Let’s do it.”

  “Okay.”

  As I grabbed the door handle, everything faded to black, and I was in the courtroom facing Judge McClary, the judge who’d presided over Bruce Wayne’s trial. He was looking over the bench at me, his face red with anger. “I can’t believe you tried to submit this as evidence given what you know about the questionable chain of custody.”

  The parking lot came back into view. “The judge is going to throw out your evidence.”

  Mason’s mouth dropped open, and my face flushed.

  He immediately laid a hand on my shoulder. “Rose, don’t do that. Don’t be embarrassed by something you can’t control.”

  “I’m sorry. I…I just…”

  “You didn’t do anything wrong. Can you tell me what you saw?”

  I studied my hands in my lap. “I was in the courtroom where Bruce Wayne’s trial was held, and Judge McClary was looking over the bench at me, which means he was looking at you. Then he said he was throwin’ out the evidence due to a questionable chain of custody. He looked really angry.”

  Mason sat back in his seat. “Well, I’ll be damned.”

  I looked up in confusion. “Are you mad?”

  “Mad? Why would I be mad? You just helped me.”

  “What? How?”

  “There was some question about a time stamp in the chain of custody on a blood sample for a DUI case I’m prosecuting next week. I won’t submit it as evidence now.”

  “Oh. But my vision might not be true.”

  “But there’s a good chance it is. I was worried about building my case on it. Now I’ll take a different tactic.” Mason’s eyes locked on mine. “Don’t let people belittle you, Rose. Don’t be ashamed of who you are.”

  Joe and Neely Kate had told me the same thing. So why had Violet always believed the opposite? Mason had given me something to think about. “Let’s go buy a truck.”

  Mason was right about getting a better price because he was the assistant DA. I paid less for the truck than I’d anticipated, partly because Mason got a better trade in for the Nova than I’d thought possible. When Mason was satisfied, I signed the paperwork and wrote a check.

  After we were finished, we got into the truck, and I sat behind the steering wheel, shaking my head. “I can’t believe I just did that.”

  “You did it. Now you need your business name on the side. Do you know who’s going to do that for you?”

  “No, I hadn’t thought that far ahead.”

  “Stan runs the body shop on Third Street, and he’d do a good job. Tell him I sent you, and he’ll give you a deal.”

  My eyebrows rose as I looked at him.

  Mason shrugged. “I helped him collect on
some hot checks. He’ll help you.”

  “Thanks.”

  “No problem.”

  My cell phone rang before I put the truck into reverse, so I pulled it out of my purse, hoping it might be Joe. It was Neely Kate.

  “You were right, Rose.” Her voice was hushed but determined. “A quit claim deed was filed last week on Dorothy’s house.”

  “Who’d she put on it?”

  “You’re not gonna believe this part. Jonah Pruitt.”

  I cast a glance at Mason, trying to contain my shock. “So he owns her house now.”

  “It looks like it.”

  Mason had noticed my change in demeanor and was outright staring at me.

  I tried to ignore him. “Can you find about the other…person?” I didn’t want to say Miss Laura’s name or he’d know for sure what I was talking about.

  “One step ahead of you. When I found out about Dorothy, I asked Marta to look into it. I’ll let you know when she gets back to me.”

  “Thanks, Neely Kate. I’ll talk to you later.”

  “Anytime.”

  “Is everything okay?” Mason asked when I hung up the phone.

  “Yeah. Fine.” I wasn’t sure what to do with this information. I needed to let it sink in before I decided how to tell Mason, so I focused on something else. “Why didn’t you correct the salesman when he thought we were a couple?”

  “Rule number four of negotiating a deal: Never correct the other person’s assumptions. You never know when you might be able to use it to your advantage, one way or the other.”

  “Hmm…okay.”

  “What are you insinuating? I’m well aware that you’re with Joe. I would never stand in the way of your happiness.”

  “I didn’t mean—”

  “Rose, it’s no big deal. We’re friends, all right? I like us being friends.”

  “Me too.”

  I parked at the square, close to Mason’s car. The truck was wider than the Nova, but not by much. It was easier getting into a parking spot than I would have thought.

  “What are you going to do now?” he asked.

  “I’ll get the big pots Violet and I made and deliver them.” I really didn’t want to go back to the church now. What if Jonah was involved in Dorothy’s murder? What if he killed Miss Dorothy and Miss Laura to get all their money? Heavens knew he was throwing money around like it was holy water.