Primals (Reverse Harem Series, #1)

by Lexy Timms

  “Is he alive?” I ask, almost afraid to.

  “Yes, thanks to Sebastian as well,” Theo answers, approaching the bed. “He left a letter for you, actually.”

  I set down my cup on the bedside table so I can take the piece of paper from Theo’s hand, unfolding it.

  Clarissa,

  I’m sorry for everything. I never meant to hurt you or allow you to get hurt. Still, it happened, and so I’m prepared to face the consequences of my poor judgment.

  I don’t know if you were listening when I was talking to you before. If you were, all I said then still holds true. If you weren’t, let me just say this:

  If ever you need me, if you want to see me, I’ll be there.

  Yours, Toshiyuki Sato

  I fold the note again, running my fingers over the paper before placing it on the bedside table. I pick up my cup and as I bring it to my lips for a sip, I recall that monologue he gave just before he had that nasty fight with Sebastian. Yes, I remember it. Every word.

  I’m not sure if I can trust him, but I do believe he never meant for any harm to come to me.

  “What happened to Syllas?” I ask Theo.

  “He’s dead,” Theo tells me. “He’ll never hurt you again. And we burned that facility down, along with every sample or piece of information in it.”

  “So, are you saying I’m safe?” I ask him hopefully. “That no one will come for me or try to experiment on me again?”

  “Sebastian, Toshi and I will go to the Council and make a report,” Theo says. “We have to, since many Cats were killed, and we don’t want to start a war.”

  My eyebrows furrow. “You’ll go to the Council? Toshi, too?”

  “Yes.” Theo nods. “We’ll tell them about Project Eden and we’ll say Syllas was trying to revive it, to abduct humans. Toshi will say he was the one who shared that information.”

  “But they’ll think he’s a traitor.”

  “Some might, but many Cats think it’s every Cat for himself. Anyway, he has to say that or else the Council might not believe us. They might just think that Sebastian is trying to start a war between the Wolf and the Cats. Many Wolves have tried.”

  So, Toshi is sacrificing his reputation, turning against his own kind, to keep everyone safe. Is this what he meant by facing the consequences of his poor judgment?

  I look at Theo. “So, with Toshi’s testimony, they’ll believe you? They won’t punish you?”

  “They will question us thoroughly and they will be upset that we didn’t inform them sooner. There may be sanctions as well. But they will understand that what we did was for the good of the primals. Best of all, they won’t know about you. You will be safe.”

  I let out a deep breath. Safe, huh? That word is so underrated.

  Theo holds my hand. “You don’t have to worry about anything anymore. You can go on with your life as before.”

  I doubt that, but I’m glad to hear him say it anyway. I give him a weak smile. “Thank you, Theo. And please thank Sebastian and Toshi for me, too.”

  “I will,” he promises, squeezing my hand lightly. “Though something tells me you’ll have the chance to thank them yourself someday.”

  He lets my hand go. “I have to go now. Just one more thing.”

  He takes out a carved wooden flower from his pocket. “For you.”

  He puts it in my palm and I stare at it, admiring the craftsmanship before clutching it to my heart. “I’ll treasure it,” I promise him. “I’m sorry I lost the leaf but I promise I won’t lose this one.”

  He nods.

  “Maybe next time we meet, I’ll have carved something for you?” I add, needing him to know that I still want him in my life. That he’s important to me.

  He smiles. “I would like that.”

  He walks to the door then stops.

  “By the way, Gia says hello,” he says, turning around. “I told her about you and she said she likes you.”

  “I like her, too,” I say as I hide Theo’s gift under my pillow. “She really sounds like an amazing woman.”

  “Funny. She said the same thing about you.”

  Smiling, he reaches for the door knob.

  “Wait,” I tell him, an idea coming to mind.

  He turns around again. “What is it?”

  “I...” I take a deep breath. “Do you think you can tell my parents something?”

  “Anything.”

  “Tell them they did nothing wrong,” I say, stroking my cup. “Tell them I’m glad they brought me into this world, and that they mustn’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I’m brave just like they were.”

  “That you are,” Theo agrees, smiling his approval.

  “And tell them I...” I stare out the window, envisioning their faces. “Tell them I love them.”

  “I will,” Theo promises. “I’m sure they love you, too.”

  “I know.”

  I can almost see them smiling at me now, tears stinging my eyes.

  Find peace, Mom and Dad.

  “I’ll go now,” Theo says.

  I turn to him, blinking a tear away. “Take care, Theo. It was wonderful to know you.”

  “Not as wonderful as it was for me to know you,” he says, the look in his eyes making my chest feel even warmer.

  Just then, the door opens, hitting Theo’s back with a thud, though he seems like he didn’t feel anything at all. Behind him, Kyle stands in the doorway with a bowl in hand.

  “Oops.” Kyle scratches his head. “I didn’t mean to interrupt. I just came to bring food.”

  “It’s fine.” Theo turns to him. “She’s yours now. Then again, she always was.”

  I pause in the act of taking another sip of coffee, eyebrows lifted.

  Excuse me?

  Theo pats a blushing Kyle on the shoulder. “Just tell her.”

  Tell me what?

  “Ouch.” Kyle winces, rubbing his shoulder.

  “Sorry,” Theo mutters. “I’ll get out of your way now.”

  He disappears from view, his thunderous footsteps making the house shake as they go down the stairs. I hear the front door opening and closing, then nothing. Everything is still and silent, leaving me to my confusion.

  What just happened?

  “That guy sure knows how to make an exit, doesn’t he?” Kyle says as he approaches the bed, his cheeks still a shade of pink.

  What was he going to tell me?

  Come to think of it, he did say he had something to tell me when all this was over. And it does seem over now.

  “Here you go.” Kyle sets the bowl down on the bedside table, just beside Toshi’s note with my name on it. “So, they’re gone now, huh?”

  “Yup.” I take a sip. “Funny how the house seems empty without them.”

  “Yeah. People who stir things up tend to do that.” He rubs his chin. “Though I can’t say I miss them.”

  I let that slide as I set my cup down. “How are you?”

  “Good.” He pulls the chair close to my bed and sits on it. “I went to a doctor yesterday.”

  “And?” I ask curiously.

  “I thought he was going to call the cops. Well, he wanted to. He wouldn’t believe I fell off a roof.”

  “What did he think happened?”

  “That my wife was beating the crap out of me, I think.”

  My eyes grow wider. “Really?”

  “He must have thought I was one of those men into bondage or pain or you know, that sort of thing.” He rubs the back of his head.

  I chuckle. “Poor Kyle.”

  “And if that’s not bad enough, I have to take these pills that taste horrible, too, but hey, they did make me feel better.”

  “That’s good,” I tell him.

  He picks up the bowl. “So, are you hungry?”

  I narrow my eyes at him. “You don’t cook, remember?”

  “There’s no harm in trying.” He hands me the bowl.

  I shake my head, pinching my nose as soon as I get a whiff of so
mething...not right. “I think there might be.”

  Kyle’s eyebrows go up. “Really?”

  He sniffs the bowl then grimaces in disgust. “Now that I think about it, I’m afraid you may be right.”

  “You didn’t even smell it or taste it?” I ask in surprise.

  “Nope.” He brings the bowl into the bathroom and moments later, I hear a plop and a flush. “What if I killed myself?”

  I laugh, my cup quaking as I lift it to take another sip.

  Just as I thought, Kyle never fails to make me laugh, and I have to admit it feels good to be able to laugh again.

  Suddenly, with the rim of the cup to my lips, I pause, remembering when I thought that. That time, I had made up my mind to leave Kyle because I didn’t want him to be in danger, even though it hurt so much, much more than I expected. I remember, too, when Syllas threatened to hurt him and how the pain from that overwhelmed me, helping to send me over the brink.

  Two different scenes, one common factor – Kyle.

  In the midst of the memories and the feelings that come rushing back with them, a realization dawns on me – I can’t bear to lose Kyle. How is it I’ve never known this before?

  “Hey,” Kyle says as he comes out of the bathroom, wiping his hands on the hem of his shirt. “Why so serious all of a sudden?”

  I set my cup down on the table and gaze into his eyes. “What were you going to tell me?”

  He falls silent.

  “You said you were going to tell me something important, remember?” I remind him. “When we were in Africa?”

  “Yeah.” He sits down, scratching the back of his head. “So much has happened since then.”

  “True,” I agree. “But some things haven’t changed, have they?”

  He leans forward, elbows on his knees. Clasping his hands, he takes a deep breath. “Actually, things have changed. They have for a while now.”

  “What do you mean?” I ask him, swinging my legs over so that I’m sitting on the edge of the bed, right in front of him.

  He wrings his hands. “You are my best friend, Clarissa, the best I’ve ever had. And I’m happy. And for a time, I was content with that. But I haven’t been for a while now.”

  He lifts his head, eyes as blue as the sky outside meeting mine.

  “I started thinking of spending the rest of my life with you, of every waking and sleeping moment with you. I started wanting more of you, all of you.”

  I hold my breath, a lump forming in my throat.

  “I love you, Clarissa,” he confesses, reaching for my hand. “When those other...men arrived, I got so scared. I thought I was going to lose you because clearly, they all want the same thing I do – you. And they’re smarter and more good-looking and...”

  “Kyle.” I squeeze his hand, unable to bear hearing him put himself down.

  “And then I found out what you were,” he continues. “And I thought ‘I don’t deserve this woman. She doesn’t belong with me.’”

  “What?”

  “But I didn’t mind. I was prepared to lose you if it was for the best, if it meant you’d be safe and happy.”

  I stare at him, eyes wide and jaw dropping.

  Kyle thought that?

  He places his other hand over mine. “All I want, Clarissa, is for you to be happy.”

  I stare at his hands, falling silent as my heart seemingly halts. Fresh tears prick my eyes.

  “Clarissa?” Kyle asks.

  I look back into his eyes with tear-filled ones, chuckling.

  Kyle’s eyebrows furrow. “You haven’t gone mad, have you?”

  I laugh, wiping my tears with the back of my hand.

  “No, silly. It’s just that I was thinking the same thing.”

  He gives me a puzzled look. “You were thinking of leaving me with Sebastian and Theo and...?”

  “No.” I shake my head as I let out another chuckle. “I was prepared to lose you, too.”

  “You were?”

  “After you got hurt when you tried to stop Sebastian and Toshi from fighting, I felt guilty. I thought this is all my fault. You got hurt because of me.”

  “But it wasn’t your fault,” he says. “I was the one who foolishly thought I could stop them.”

  I ignore him, continuing. “I thought the same thing – that I don’t belong with you. Not because I don’t want to be with you but because I thought I couldn’t be. I thought that as long as I was with you, you’d be in harm’s way. And I’d rather leave you than lose you.”

  He cups my cheek. “I would have followed you to the ends of the earth. I mean, I went to Alaska for you, didn’t I?”

  “Yet, you’d give me up to another man?”

  “Only if that was what you wanted.” He strokes my cheek. “Whatever you want, I’ll give it to you.”

  I place my hand over his. “And what if I say I don’t ever want to lose you?”

  “Then you never will.” He takes my hand. “I love you, Clarissa Wagner. I don’t care what you are or what happened in your past or what will become of you in the future. I love as you are and as whatever you may be. I will always love you.”

  He presses my hand to his lips.

  My lips curve into a smile. “I love you, too, Kyle Summers.”

  He, too, smiles, his blue eyes glistening like a lake under the first rays of the sun, his entire face lighting up.

  I touch his cheek. He and I may be different now, but he’ll always be my best friend.

  And my best man.

  He leans forward, his warm breath tickling my skin. I close my eyes, waiting for his lips to brush against mine and when they do, I kiss him back. Grasping my chin, he kisses me harder and so do I, our tongues becoming entwined. It’s different and strange and heady and wonderful. The more our lips collide and meet in this dance that’s brand new, the more I realize there’s a delicious heat reaching all the way to my toes.

  How long have I been wanting to do this?

  And why on earth did I wait so long?

  Too long.

  As he grabs the hem of my shirt, I lift my arms up, letting him take it off before pulling his own shirt up and out of the way. Then I swing my legs so that I’m back on top of the bed, Kyle on top of me.

  He strokes my cheek, his blue eyes looking deep into mine.

  “Are you sure about this?” he asks in a breathless whisper. “About me?”

  I nod. “It’s the only thing I’m sure of right now.”

  He smiles, reminding me of a child on Christmas morning, but when he seals my mouth with his again, it’s the kiss of a man I receive.

  A man who wants me, loves me.

  And damn, I love him.

  I run my fingers across his back as I return his kisses with equal passion but stop as he winces.

  “Sorry,” he says. “It still hurts a bit.”

  My eyes widen with horror as I realize what I’ve done. “I’m so sorry.”

  “Shh.” He runs a finger across my lower lip. “It’s okay. You just...have to be gentle, okay?”

  Oh, I can be gentle.

  “Turn around,” I tell him as I sit up.

  “What?”

  “Just do it.”

  He obeys, showing his bare back to me. Like before, the wounds and bruises that have barely healed fill me with horror and guilt and this time, I decide to atone for them.

  I press a kiss to one of the bruises than to another. Then I brush my lips across the biggest cut I can find. Kyle jerks in response, then shivers.

  “Clarissa,” he gasps.

  I continue, kissing, licking, worshipping every inch of damaged skin I can find and Kyle continues to shiver even as his skin becomes coated in a layer of sweat, his breath coming in shallow gasps.

  But he’s not the only one who’s struggling to breathe. My own lungs seem deprived of air, my own heart pounding wildly and out of control.

  Suddenly, Kyle turns around and pins my shoulders down on the bed, the heat in his gaze taking what breath
I have away.

  As he plants a kiss on my neck, he unhooks my bra, tossing it aside, then his mouth slides lower, his lips capturing one of my nipples.

  I let out a loud gasp, pulling on the sheets beneath me.

  He sucks on my breast, his tongue circling and rubbing against the engorged peak. Then he moves to the other, lavishing it with the same attention that leaves me speechless and breathless.

  He moves lower still, planting a kiss on my bellybutton before pulling the waistbands of my pants and my underwear, both at the same time. Then just as I lift my head to see what he’s planning on doing, he lowers his between my legs, his tongue flicking forward for a taste of me with his eyes still holding mine.

  My eyes fall shut, my head crashing down on the pillow.

  My thighs quiver and he grips them, spreading them so that his tongue can slip in. When it does, a moan escapes my lips, my hands clutching at his golden hair as my hips rise off the bed.

  “Fuck!”

  His tongue delves deeper, slithering, twitching and my body quakes in response, on the brink of exploding, shattering.

  Heat swirls in my belly and in my breasts, spreading everywhere, leaking out of me, its scent filling the air. My toes curl and dig into the sheets as my nails rake his scalp.

  I’m losing control again, except this time, it feels good.

  Heck, it feels amazing.

  Just before I snap, though, Kyle stops, lifting his head and licking his lips as he stares into my half-lidded eyes.

  Standing over the bed, he takes off his pants and his briefs, his cock springing free, the thick shaft with its glistening head pointing upwards. He’s glorious and I wonder that I never knew this fact until now.

  My eyes grow wide even as my mouth waters, but Kyle gives me no time to wallow in admiration. Climbing back on the bed, he hovers above me, hands on either side of my head, eyes glazed with lust and brimming with love staring me down.

  I reach up to wrap my hands behind his neck, bringing his head down so I can whisper into his ear as he takes me.

  “I’m all yours.”

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  ~ Kyle

  I GRIP CLARISSA’S THIGHS as I settle between them, holding her gaze as I push forward, my breath catching as the tip of my cock catches on folds of wet skin.