Pear Shaped
Page 30
City Bakery, 3 West 18th Street
If it’s cold out, go to City Bakery for their legendary hot chocolate. Not for the faint hearted, or those who like their hot chocolate to resemble something you could buy from a vending machine. It’s more like a very thick, extremely velvety chocolate soup – but if that’s how you like your hot chocolate (and that is how I like mine) – make the pilgrimage.
Further reading
Heartburn, Nora Ephron
The book that most inspired me when writing Pear Shaped was Nora Ephron’s Heartburn (subsequently made into a film with Jack Nicholson and Meryl Streep). While I like the film, and love the actors, the book is superior.
It is an excellent blend of comedy and sadness, interwoven with recipes. Ephron’s writing is always sharp, wise, funny and honest and that is all I ever want in fiction.
Take Care of Yourself, Sophie Calle
Sophie Calle is a French conceptual artist and writer. Her book Take Care of Yourself was inspired by an e-mail her ex-boyfriend sent her, finishing their relationship. Calle had the e-mail analysed by 107 different women from different professions and in doing so, turned her heartbreak into a fascinating, original, creative and intriguing work of art. Plus the book has a gorgeous shiny pink cover and cool DVDs within.
The Beauty Myth, Naomi Wolf
It seems unlikely that the beauty, diet and anti-ageing industries will do anything other than grow in the future. There’s an awful lot of money to be made in manipulating female insecurity. An important and disturbing book.
The Sociopath Next Door, Martha Stout
This best-selling popular psychology book came out in 2005, and is subtitled The Ruthless versus The Rest of Us. It posits that 1 in 20 of us ‘normal’ folk is in fact sociopathic, i.e. capable of acting without a conscience, and thus potentially extremely dangerous to be involved with. It is quite scary, when you look at the checklist in the book, to realise that you probably work with, or are friends with, at least one bona fide sociopath. Fascinating and useful.
Poems
I’m not terribly good with poetry. Usually it makes me feel a bit thick, because I don’t ever understand all the layers of meaning the poet intended. However I mentioned two poems in Pear Shaped that I do like, and that I think I understand.
Nora Criona, by James Stephens
James Stephens was an Irish novelist and poet. I don’t know much about him but according to Wikipedia he was mates with James Joyce, and from his photo it looks like he wore hats a little too small for his head. As far as I’m aware he did not drive a Maserati. The poem Sophie mentions on the first page of the book is called ‘Nora Criona’, and is about the perils of being too attentive to a man.
Bluebird, by Charles Bukowski
The second poem is Sophie’s and her ex Nick’s favourite poem, ‘Bluebird’, by the American writer Charles Bukowski. Bukowski wrote an awful lot of poems, including an excellent one about becoming a writer, and ‘Bluebird’, about love. I think it’s rather wonderful.
Acknowledgements
To the many people who have encouraged, supported and helped me while I was writing this book, most notably:
Kowski – for being brilliant and being better.
My dear friends Bobby, Baz, Dalia and Nicole. For enduring my first drafts and for being there always with patience, honesty and wisdom.
Lisa B – for pushing me up the mountain of Kong and tobogganing down the other side, roll ups in hand.
Ed McD for some perspective. What would Madonna do?
Mavis – for the material and the immaterial. There’s no one I’d rather eat apricots with.
Matt – for hitting me in the Harwood with a packet of granola and making me cry, and for 15 years of Saab driver wisdom.
To Sophie and Sean, for the extreme generosity in lending us the best house in the world. I promise Dave didn’t lay a finger on Barbie. Maybe in her …
Kathryn F – for being the perfect mother-in-law, and giving me the kindest feedback always.
Anna H & Simon D – for bringing me chocolate seashells when I couldn’t see the shore.
Debbi A – two numbers for you dude. Seven. Eleven. The most fun ever. xx
Kate Long, Jeremy Sheldon, and everyone on my Arvon course – for advice, hope, and laughing at my jokes.
Jenny B, Queen of Puddings, for your fabulous knowledge of desserts and letting me tag along to the cake factory. Best. Job. Ever.
Nat F – for your time, your immense talent and for being a 24-hour go-to emergency service. We tried, my darling, at least we tried.
Anna T and Joy for being my surrogate Buddhas and having the patience of many saints.
Ben & Gabi, and Russell & Keren – Dyer to play Devron?
Oliver ‘Paul’ Newman – for the kiss of life.
The beautiful Flanders and Liv – house-stealers extraordinaire.
My oldest BF, BFK – for the weasel.
Margarita, Jane, Anand, Allan and Melanie – for taking care of my mind, body and soul.
Ellie ‘Business Critical’ G, Anna ‘Big Balls’ P, Lauren ‘Legs’ S, and Hazel ‘clever clogs and heels’ W, for the sympathetic eyes.
Susie A – for being deadpan, sassy, wise, and the best hitman/wingman a girl could ask for. Sorry this isn’t in yellow …
Lou – for being the opposite of Devron and for believing in me.
Antonello – Segize dice grazie per le lezioni di Italiano.
Fern ‘CEO’ V, for the cover stories.
Simon K – for dropping everything at a moment’s notice to simulate sex with me in your high performance Italian sports car – still laughing.
Dominic – for pointing out the difference between being in gear and neutral, teaching me how to spell betterer, and for the funniest grammar joke ever.
Andrew, a great, generous and loyal friend, for actually buying a Sub-Zero.
Sanj – for always being Mr Saturday Night and in my hour of need Mr Wednesday Night. And for letting me drive the DB9. Such a footballer’s car …
My beloved Gerry. Hyrum was right about us bad kids in the back row.
Nate – for showing me your tattoos.
The fabulous Slater boys – for being almost as funny as each other. And not quite as funny as the gorgeous Alvin.
Daniel S – idea generator, triangle giver and taker, ice-cream connoisseur. What’re the odds that we haven’t played bad minton by the time you finally get round to reading this book?
Jenny K – the fag what needs no lighter. I could not have done this without you. For the c-punch, the e-mail, the g-force. You next please.
Claire B. Thank you. Thank you.
Charlotte – for perpetual grace and good cheer.
Cathryn and Becki – for all your hard work and support.
All of the Avon ladies – for immense patience, hard work and energy on my behalf.
C – for the joy, and for the learning experience.
Mr and Mrs Jones – for generosity beyond compare.
My dear sister – for being a tough crowd all the way. Now will you take this to your book group?
Tabby and Cesca – the icing on my cake.
My first husband, paint-drinker, lamb-wrangler, horse-stealer of the highest order R Genn – the biggest brain, the biggest heart – to whom I owe a debt of more than 55 million x
And finally to Mum and Dad – for giving me strong legs.
About the Author
Stella Newman studied English at Sussex University. She lives in London and is a freelance copywriter and keen amateur cook. She is currently writing her second novel and her first screenplay. She blogs about restaurants, food and writing at www.stellanewmansblog.blogspot.com.
Copyright
This novel is entirely a work of fiction.
The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
&nbs
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A Paperback Original 2011
Stella Newman asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
ISBN-13: 978-1-84756-270-8
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PEAR-SHAPED. Copyright © Stella Newman 2011. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
EPub Edition © DECEMBER 2011 ISBN: 978-0-00-745769-4
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* I am also not averse to a small pot of Ambrosia custard, not least because it keeps for ages and ages and is handily small-portioned for when your self-control is weak.
Table of Contents
Title Page
Dedication
Epigraph
Contents
Parfait
Crumble
Icing
Epilogue
Food in the book
A word on brownies…
A few of my favourite things…
Further reading
Acknowledgements
About the Author
Copyright
About the Publisher
Table of Contents
Title Page
Dedication
Epigraph
Contents
Parfait
Crumble
Icing
Epilogue
Food in the book
A word on brownies…
A few of my favourite things…
Further reading
Acknowledgements
About the Author
Copyright
About the Publisher