Gone.
Summer was gone.
I felt like I couldn’t breathe.
And yet I knew what I had to do.
I have taken so much time focusing on getting my shit together, that it never occurred to me that Summer would run. A part of me did not know how to process this information. I kept telling myself that it couldn't be real. She couldn't just give up and go back. What if she went back to Cameron? She could be hurting so much from the feeling of rejection I shoved down her throat, that it was no stretch to think she would run right back into his arms. My mind was going to fucking explode at the thought.
“Marie, I am going to get our girl.” It was never a question as to what I needed to do. My girl was coming home. I don't care if I have to drag her ass back screaming and shouting, she belonged here. With me. It was now up to me to convince her that I was ready to be the man she wanted and needed.
The thing with Summer is no matter what direction our lives had taken us over the years, she had always been mine. She would always be mine. From the first moment we met, until the day that we both leave this earth, this lifetime was meant to be ours.
I needed to heal her just as much as she could heal me. We both would find salvation in one another. She was my only hope and losing her was not an option that I was willing to consider.
After hanging up the phone with Marie, I stared down at the tiny piece of paper that held Summer's phone number and new address. Oh no. It was not going to be this easy, Summer. You do not get to waltz back into my life, turn it upside down, and then think that you can just walk back out.
The games are over and this is real life now. So whatever she thinks that she is trying to do, she is in for one hell of a fight.
No woman has ever had me by the balls this way. This infuriating, hardheaded, sassy mouthed spitfire had me in her steel grip. I will be damned if I let her think that she is going to have me strung out like a damn drug addict needing his next fix. She was not going to leave me in ruin.
There is only one challenge left, the one Marie had just set on the table. I had been dared to love and I was not about to walk away from the biggest challenge of my life.
I picked up the phone and blocked my number before dialing Summer. I wanted the element of surprise. The phone continued to ring and ring before the voicemail finally picked up.
“Summer Montgomery, I do not know what the hell you think you are doing. You do not get to just pick up and run back to New York with your tail between your legs. You said that you loved me and yet you leave without fighting for me. So I am telling you right now, baby girl, you can call me back and we can talk about this, or I will come drag your ass right back here. If you think that I won't, you have another thing coming. I want you to try me. I better hear back from you as soon as you get this,” I hung up the phone and had to control the frustration and amusement I was feeling in that instance.
Part of me was wondering if Summer knew exactly what she was doing to me. If I thought that I was going insane before it was only magnified now. I know that I drove her away. I never thought that I could really settle down. I never imagined I could want one woman for the rest of my life. The moment that I had Summer in my bed, she not only captured my body, but she embedded herself into the recesses of my heart. The heart I once thought was broken and dead was now more alive than ever and every beat of my heart whispered her name over and over again.
I made my way to the front of the shop in a haze of worry and mixed emotions. Waiting was the worst part. Wondering if she was going to call me back was the only the only thing my mind could focus on.
The shop was empty of clients and I took advantage of this time to call and postpone my appointments that I had added to my schedule for the next week. There was no doubt in my mind that I would end up having to go to New York.
“Cash, I will be out for the next week. Summer apparently took off to New York and I need to go get her, man. I can't just let her stay in New York, not when she belongs here with me. I have to go after her before it's too late.” Cash looked at me with pity. The last fucking thing I needed.
“I'm not going to say that I told you so, but I told you so. Hell, this should be interesting to say the least. Does she know that you are coming?” he laughed through his question.
“Well, I didn't really give her a choice. I told her if she doesn't call me back that I am coming to get her. This woman is in my head and I won't be right until she is back here with me.” Cash nodded his understanding.
“I don't know what the big deal is. The bitch is nothing but a cock tease anyway. Let the whore stay where she is,” Devon chimed in and almost just as quickly regretted the words as soon as he saw the fire in my eyes.
“Watch your fucking mouth dude. You don't know Summer like I know her. You are just pissed off because you couldn't get some of her pussy,” My eyes narrowed challenging him to test me today. The son of a bitch obviously didn't know when to leave well enough alone.
“Oh, I had her sweet little pussy, and it was all in my face. So don't go getting all sensitive over my sloppy seconds. Like I told her, she still owes me. The way that cunt left me hanging, I am definitely not finished with her pretty little ass yet. I am going to teach that bitch a lesson she will not forget.”
My blood boiled and hearing her name roll off of his cocky, arrogant mouth made me want to wipe the floor with his ass.
My vision clouded in a dust storm of red as my pulse echoed loudly behind my eyes.
I lunged at him and my hands immediately went around his throat as I lifted him up against the mirror of his station. I slammed his head with a violent force that shattered the glass to fall all around us.
“You mother fucker. You will never, and I mean never, have a chance to put your disgusting hands on my woman again. If you so much as breathe her name, I will fucking kill you. Do you understand? You stay as far away from Summer as possible or the only thing your dick will feel is the cold outline of a white fucking sheet.”
Devon's face was turning a little bluish-purple from the lack of oxygen. My hands wrapped tighter around his throat as he made all attempts to pry them loose. His face was riddled with pain as he struggled to grasp any morsel of air that he could find. Another two seconds and he would be out cold. All I could see in my mind's eye was his lifeless body lying on the floor. I wanted to kill this son of a bitch and had it not been for Cash and the other fellas pulling me off of him, I probably would have strangled out the last remaining breath he had in his body.
When Devon fell to the floor on his knees gasping, I took advantage of his weakness. I pulled his head back by the hair, nailed a swift uppercut to his face, and landed one final blow to his ribs. I unleashed all of the frustration and anger at myself over the fact that Summer was gone, on this mother fucker. The guys knew he had crossed a line that there is no coming back from. You do not fuck with Damien Cole or anything that belongs to him.
The guys joined in as we beat Devon into a bloody mess on the shop floor. When he finally lay there nearly lifeless, I order them to get the piece of shit out of there. He was through.
“Drop his ass off at the hospital ER door. He is out! I do not want him back at this shop. He is through. I will make sure this mother fucker never sees the light of another tattoo shop in this city. He has fucked with the wrong mother fucker.” I look over at Devon as they hold him up and growl at him, “Remember what I said. You mess with Summer, it will be the last fucking thing you ever do. So I suggest you choose your movements wisely.”
There is nothing that I want more right now than a stiff fucking drink. My knuckles are split open from the weight of the punches that I landed repeatedly to Devon's face. I am pretty sure the bastard will need stitches for his face after all the blows I landed. The rage that boiled over and consumed me is unlike anything I have ever felt before. Now that the moment was over, my hands are visibly shaking.
I would kill for Summer. The thought never hit so close to home unti
l Devon took me over the fucking edge. I would not only kill to protect her, but I would die to save her. The impact of that statement alone is so profound that I don't know how I could not have seen it before.
I clean up my hands in the restroom, washing away the last bit of blood off of them. I am still slowly bleeding on two of my knuckles where the skin is busted open. At this point, I could care less, the only fucking thing I want is to talk to Summer.
Hearing her voice is the only thing that can bring me back to reality.
My world is much like my hands, open and exposed, and the rawness of that is unbearable.
I feel trapped in a darkness of solitude and I need her to bring me back. I am blinded by my love for her and she is nowhere in reach. My only hope is for her to pull me up and back into the light. I need her to save me.
I picked up the phone as I sit mesmerized by the blood that continues to pour from my hands, I dialed her number and waited to hear her voice on the voicemail. I was shocked when her voice came over the other end of the phone. It caught me so off guard, I could barely find my voice as tears sprang to my eyes.
“Damien. There is nothing to talk about. Why are you calling me?” Her stubbornness only pissed me off more.
“There is a hell of a lot to talk about, Summer. You need to come home. We are not over and if you will just listen to me you will see that we are just getting started. I want you in my life and I am not prepared to live without you. Fuck everything I said before. I realize now that my life is nothing without you. I need you Summer,” I pleaded into the phone, laying my soul bare to her and taking the chance to be vulnerable enough for her to rip my heart out of my chest.
“Oh, I'm sorry. Did you suddenly have some great epiphany after I left? Why now? After all this time, what has changed?” Her irritation rubbed me in all the wrong ways, but I knew that I had it coming. I didn't expect this to be easy. Nothing in my life ever came easy and if it did it never held any value or importance.
“I have changed. I realize now that I have always loved you. I just couldn't take the chance of hurting you, Summer. Don't you realize that I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you?” My voice cracked with all the emotions that began to well up inside of me and the desperation for her laid heavy on the words that I spoke.
“Well, you don't just get to play with my emotions. One minute you don't want this and the next you do. You need to make up your mind. This doesn't work on your terms Damien. I gave you time and I waited. You never came. You didn't fight for me and you just gave up when the only option you had was to fight. I need someone who will show up, who will fight for me, and who won't give up the minute things get scary. I need someone I can depend on and Damien I do not think that is you anymore. You showed me exactly where I stand. So, excuse me if I am not overjoyed and on the move the minute you call for me to come running back. There is nothing else to say. What we could have had is over. I can't live in the past anymore. I need to move on. You need to let me move on and heal. Don't do this. Not now. You do not have that right.”
With her words, I hear her heart breaking all over again. I am reminded of all the ways that I have failed her and it makes me sick to my stomach.
“Summer, please. Just give me one more chance. I know I don't deserve it, but I am begging you!” I plead with her and realize the irony that our roles have reversed. I now knew exactly what she must have been feeling that day, trying to reach that part of me that I refused to show her.
“No. I am done. I don't want to play games anymore. Goodbye Damien.”
“Summer, don't you dare hang up this phone on me. It is not done. We are never going to be done because we haven't even started yet. If you don't come home, I will come to New York. Now please, be rational about this and just give me a chance.” I wait for her response. I wait for her sigh or some smart ass comment about how stubborn and infuriating I am. I wait to hear her say fine I will come home but all the things that I need and want her to say never come. Instead, the only thing she has left to say is crystal clear as the dial tone sounds loudly in my ear the moment she hangs up the phone on me.
“Dammit. Dammit. Dammit,” I slam the phone against the receiver over and over as it breaks into pieces.
“Well, you didn't think it would be that easy did you? If you did, then you don't know my daughter at all.” My eyes swing to the door as Marie leans against the old door frame.
I rake my hand through my hair and wince in pain the moment I do.
“I don't know what I thought. Maybe. Yes, I guess I thought that she would just be glad to hear from me. That, maybe, she would be able to tell that she finally broke through to me. I really thought that she would hear how desperate I am for her in my voice and know that it has always been her. Maybe it was a game in the beginning. Who would be the first to fall? But this is real, this is me walking away from all of the games.”
“Oh honey. This is way past the games you two used to play. This is when shit gets real. So now you have to figure out how to show her it is real for you.” Marie pulls up a chair and grabs the first aid kit out of the stock room.
She takes my hand into hers as she starts to clean the blood beginning to dry around my knuckles. With a tenderness only a mother can show, she tends to the broken flesh and bandages my hand up.
“Listen, this is where the fight begins. Now are you going to just give up because she isn't making it easy for you? Or are you going to really show her you are serious? Everything is in your control. As much as you think it is in Summer's, it isn't. Summer is still hurting. She is trying to force herself to move on. Don't give her that opportunity. It's time for you to step up and fight like you have never had to fight before. I have faith in you. I have known for a long time that you and Summer are meant to be together. Now you two have to find your way back where you belong. I love you kiddo, and my baby is as stubborn as they come, but that's why you love her.”
Marie planted a warm kiss on my cheek before heading out.
“Oh and by the way, those damages are coming out of your check.” She reprimanded me as she eyes the broken glass and the mess I had made when I attacked Devon. She sent a smirk back over her shoulder and then she was gone.
I assume Devon had probably called her to tell her what happened. The asshole probably tried to get me fired. Little did he know, if it had been up to Marie, he would have never been here to start with. I hired him against her better judgment and now I got the “I told you so” look from her.
Chapter Fifteen
Summer
I had only just walked in the door from the gym when the phone rang. I looked at the name on the caller id. This was the second time today Damien had called. After listening to the voicemail he left earlier, I fought the temptation to call him back. I started to just hit ignore but a part of me craved to hear his voice, so I caved. I picked up the phone and answered his call. I listened to everything he had to say but I stood my ground. He would have to fight for this. It was not going to be handed to him.
I couldn't deny the way his words broke through to my lonely heart. All the words I had waited to hear him say, were suddenly right there, speaking to me loud and clear. But, after everything that just happened with Cameron, I was in no mood to just give in and make it that easy.
Fuck that.
He would have to show me how he felt. I was done taking men at their word. Words were empty without actions to back them up. I realized that this was a gamble. I was risking the chance that Damien would just give up. After all, giving up on something sustainable was always in his nature. I needed to see that he had changed and the assurance that he was willing to fight no matter the cost. If he had that in him, then he would end up proving me wrong.
Right now, the only thing I am certain of is that I love this man so fucking completely and as much as I love him, I need him to love me more.
That would have to be proven in time. For now, I need to really get focused and not let him get the upper hand.
In a week I should be good as new. As much as it hurt, Cameron still hit like a bitch. I had taken worse.
I walk to the freezer and grab an ice pack before settling down on the couch. I couldn't help but wince as the cold sent sharp rays of pain skittering up to my head as I tried to ice my fucked up face.
What a week! I just need to sleep. I am physically and emotionally exhausted and I don't think that I can deal with anything else. Enough has happened lately and I am just drained. The week has been more than eventful and I just wanted some peace and quiet to drown out all of the thoughts that were racing through my aching head.
I would have to deal with my mother later. It had not escaped me that she had butted in where she didn't belong by giving Damien my phone number. What the hell she thought she was doing beyond me, but she had crossed a line. Good intentions or not, it was not her place.
Part of me wondered if that is the only reason Damien had reached out to begin with and is one of the reasons I was resisting to cave. I didn't want him to come calling because someone had told him to. That is not how this is going to play out. Damien has had his whole life to live on his own terms, if he is ready to lay down his bad boy ways, then it is going to be on my terms.
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