The Forgotten Recipe

by Amy Clipston

  Dat shook his head with a concerned expression. “You have to tell her. Just start by telling her where you work, and the rest will come to you.”

  “But I can’t bear the thought of losing her.” Jason lifted his hat and raked his hands through his hair. “I can’t bear it.”

  Dat’s brown eyes were sympathetic. “Do you think she feels the same way for you as you feel for her?”

  Jason nodded. “I do.”

  “If that’s true, then she will forgive you. She’ll understand why you wanted to wait until the right time. Just tell her you care for her and you don’t want to lose her.”

  Dat made it sound so easy, but every time Jason had attempted to tell her the truth, the words had evaporated, leaving him speechless and nervous. “I’ll try,” he promised.

  “Let’s go inside,” Dat said. “It’s late. We have church tomorrow.”

  As Jason walked with his father toward the house, he silently vowed to tell Veronica the truth as soon as he could. Somehow he’d convince her he wanted to tell her sooner about his friendship with Seth, and somehow she’d have to understand and forgive him.

  CHAPTER 15

  “JASON IS SO SWEET,” VERONICA TOLD MAMM AS THEY planted pansies together Thursday afternoon. “He’s so funny. He gives me a weather prediction every time I see him.”

  “Oh ya?” Mamm smiled while wiping her brow. “What did he say for this week?”

  “No rain.” Veronica laughed. “And he was right. I don’t know how he predicts it so well.”

  Mamm shook her head. “It’s a gift, I suppose.” She picked up the watering can and began to water the flowers. “You really like him, don’t you?”

  “Ya, I do.” Veronica considered her feelings as she continued to pat the new soil with her trowel. “I was so worried that I would feel guilty, but I don’t. I’ll never forget Seth, and he’ll always have a special place in my heart. My feelings for Jason are different since he’s a different person. Does that make sense?”

  Mamm nodded while keeping her eyes trained on the colorful pansies. “Ya, I understand.”

  “My nightmares have stopped,” Veronica said.

  Mamm looked over at her. “What nightmares?”

  “I used to dream I was with Seth when he had the accident. Sometimes I was trying to save him but he died in my arms. Other times I was too far away to get to him as he fell.” Veronica dug another hole and stuck a purple pansy in it. “Now I dream about happy times with Seth, or I dream about spending time with Jason.”

  “That’s gut.” Mamm smiled again. “I’ve been worried about you. I’m thankful that you’re working through your grief and feeling better.”

  “Danki, Mamm. I’m feeling much better.” Veronica surveyed the garden, which they had been working on all week long. “We’re almost ready for church on Sunday.”

  Mamm sighed. “We have so much to do. I’m glad Emily is taking a break from Dat’s books and helping me by cleaning the floors today.”

  “Don’t worry, Mamm,” Veronica said. “We’ll get it all done. The haus will be ready in time.”

  A buggy moved up the driveway, and Veronica stood up straight. “Were you expecting company today?”

  “No.” Mamm shook her head. “Who is it?”

  “I’ll find out.” Veronica wiped her hands down her apron and walked toward the driveway. She gasped when Jason climbed out of the buggy. She was a mess! Her dress and apron were caked in dirt, and she needed to wash her hands.

  “Jason. What are you doing here?” She continued to rub her hands down her apron as he approached her. She longed to run into the house and change as he stood in front of her, looking perfect with his clean trousers and crisp, green shirt.

  “It’s nice to see you too.” He gave her a playful grin, and her knees nearly buckled. “I was wondering if you wanted to go for a picnic with me. I thought you might like to take a break from your work today.”

  Veronica gaped at him with surprise. “You want to go for a picnic now?”

  He grimaced. “I guess it’s not a gut time? I suppose I should’ve called first, but I managed to get out of work early and wanted to come and see you as soon as I could.”

  She bit her lip and turned toward her mother, who was watering the last of the flowers they’d planted.

  “I understand. It’s not a gut time.” He jammed a thumb toward the buggy. “I’ll go and come back another time.”

  “No,” she said quickly. She couldn’t allow him to leave. It had been five long days since she’d seen him. “Just wait a minute, okay?”

  “Take your time.” He leaned back against his buggy.

  Veronica rushed into the garden. “Mamm, Jason wants to take me on a picnic. Is it all right if I go for a while? I promise I’ll get back here as soon as I can, and I’ll finish the garden. I’ll mow and then finish up the weeding.”

  “Go have fun.” Mamm brushed her hands on her apron. “I’ll finish up here, and we’ll see what else needs to be done when you get back.”

  “Are you sure?” Veronica hesitated. “I hate leaving the work for you.”

  “Emily can help me as soon as she finishes the mopping.” Mamm waved at Jason, who returned the gesture from the back of the buggy. “A handsome man is waiting to take you on a picnic. Go change your dress before he leaves without you.”

  “Danki, Mamm.” Veronica squeezed her mother’s hand and then hurried toward the porch. “I’ll be right out!” she called to Jason.

  “Grab one of your pies!” he hollered back with a grin.

  She rushed up the stairs to her room. After washing up and changing into a purple dress and black apron, she checked her hair and head covering in the mirror. Once she felt she was presentable, she hurried back down the stairs. Emily was on her knees scrubbing the kitchen floor. Veronica gingerly stepped around her and grabbed a pie from the refrigerator.

  “Where are you going?” Emily asked, sitting back on her heels and wiping her sweaty brow.

  “Jason is here. He’s taking me on a picnic. I’ll be back as soon as I can to help finish up today.”

  Emily smiled. “Have fun.”

  “I will,” Veronica promised.

  She rushed out the back door, surprised to find her mother talking to Jason as he stood leaning against the buggy. He was so handsome as he crossed his arms over his wide chest and smiled. He met Veronica’s stare and waved.

  “I’m ready,” Veronica said.

  “Great,” Jason said. “I promise I’ll have her back soon.”

  “Take your time,” Mamm said. “We’ve been working hard all week. She deserves a little break.”

  “Danki, Mamm.” Veronica climbed into the passenger side of the bench seat and blew out a sigh as Jason climbed into the driver’s side. “How did you know I needed a break today?”

  “It was just a feeling I had.” He guided the horse down the driveway, waving at her mother as they made their way to the road.

  “I’m amazed by how well you know me.” She looked at him, and he kept his attention focused on the road. “It’s like you’ve known me for years instead of just a few weeks.”

  Something in his smile changed, but she couldn’t put her finger on why.

  “I guess sometimes you just have a special connection with people.” He gave her a sideways glance, but the look in his eyes seemed hesitant.

  “Ya, I suppose you’re right.” She looked over a shoulder and found a picnic basket. “You packed lunch?”

  “How am I supposed to take you on a picnic without food?” His grin teased her. “I came prepared for this special date.”

  Veronica contemplated his thoughtfulness. How had this perfect man found her when she’d needed someone like him to heal her broken heart? He felt like an answer to a prayer. Did God send him to her?

  Jason’s smile disappeared. “Was iss letz?”

  “Nothing is wrong.” She tilted her head and smiled. “I was just wondering how you found me.”

  T
HE QUESTION CAUGHT JASON OFF GUARD. DID SHE SUSPECT something? Did she know he wasn’t being honest with her? The fear slithered through his stomach, coiled up, and then settled there like a heavy brick. He had to tell her the truth. He braced himself while remembering his father’s advice to first tell her where he worked and then let the rest of the information come out slowly while reminding her how much he cared for her. He could do this.

  He had to do this and finally confess once and for all.

  Jason opened his mouth to speak, and she cut him off with a question.

  “Where are we going?” Veronica asked. She was holding the pie on her lap. Its sweet smell filled the buggy and caused his stomach to growl.

  Jason was speechless for a moment. He had prepared himself to tell her the truth about his relationship with Seth, but then she completely derailed him with a mundane question. She’d asked a question that rocked him to the core and then dropped it as if it were nothing. Veronica was truly unpredictable.

  “Are you all right?” She leaned closer to him, her pretty face full of concern.

  “Ya, I’m fine.” He cleared his throat. “We’re just going up the road a mile or two. There’s a pond up there I think you may like.” He halted the horse at a stoplight. He felt the tension in his stomach relax slightly.

  Jason had finished his work ahead of schedule and then asked his father if he could leave early. It was unusual for his father to grant him the afternoon off, but he’d caught him in a good mood. Jason rushed home to change his clothes, and when he told his mother his idea, she pulled together a lunch for him and gave him an old quilt. Once the basket was packed, he rushed to Veronica’s house, hoping she was home and available for an impromptu date.

  Veronica had looked positively adorable when he arrived and found her covered in soil from the neck down. He almost wished he had one of those fancy phones with a camera just so he could take a photo and keep it forever. Instead, he’d keep the mental picture in his mind. He certainly would treasure it.

  She craned her neck and looked into the bed of the buggy again. “I see you brought a nice big basket.”

  “I did.” Jason nodded. “My mamm had made chicken salad, and she put a few other things in there for us. She sent an old quilt for us to sit on too.”

  “So your mamm knows about me. I mean, we met at the church service that day, but she knows we are seeing each other now?”

  Jason recalled how he’d panicked when his mamm told him she’d met Veronica in the kitchen that day. What if one of the other women had made a Lancaster Sheds connection with her and pointed Veronica out as Seth’s fiancée? But all she said was that she complimented Veronica on the raspberry pies he’d been bringing home.

  He didn’t want to think about that now.

  “Ya, she does.”

  Veronica settled back in the seat, appearing satisfied with that information.

  Jason guided the horse to the road leading to the pond and then halted it near the spot where he wanted to have the picnic. He climbed out and grabbed the picnic basket. Veronica laid out the quilt on the ground next to the pond, and he sat down beside her.

  While he made their chicken salad sandwiches, she retrieved the plates, utensils, napkins, and bottles of water.

  “This is perfect,” she said, heaving a deep sigh. “What a beautiful place to have lunch and relax. This is just what I needed today.”

  “Gut.” Jason handed her a sandwich, and she thanked him. “You were doing a nice job in the garden when I arrived.”

  “Danki.” She looked embarrassed. “I know I was a mess.”

  “I thought you looked cute,” he admitted, and she blushed. He enjoyed how she looked with her cheeks bright pink.

  “My family and I have been working so hard all week,” she explained while pulling a bag of pretzels from the basket. “We’re having church at our haus on Sunday. There’s so much to do, and it seems like we never have enough time to do it. We haven’t even started cleaning out the barn yet. That’s what we’re doing all day tomorrow and Saturday. I won’t even have time to open my bake stand. I haven’t had time at all to bake this week.”

  Jason gave her a knowing looking, then scooped chicken salad onto bread for his sandwich. “Ya, it is a lot of work to host church. Do you need me to come over and help?”

  “Oh, no, danki. We’ll get it done. You should come to service Sunday, though.” She wiped her mouth with a napkin. “This is the best chicken salad I’ve ever had. I’d like to get the recipe from your mamm.”

  “I’ll ask her for it.” He bit into his sandwich.

  “So, will you come on Sunday?” she asked.

  He cleaned his mouth with the napkin and nodded. “Ya, I’d love to come.”

  “Great. I won’t be able to visit with you before Sunday, so I was hoping to get a chance to invite you. You should give me your phone number so I know how to reach you.”

  “I will. And I’d love to come on Sunday. After we’re finished eating, let’s go for a walk around the pond,” he suggested.

  “Okay.”

  Veronica talked about her garden and then baking while they finished their sandwiches and pretzels. As he listened to her, he kept thinking about Seth. He wondered if Seth had enjoyed Veronica’s smile as much as he did. Had Seth loved how adorable she looked when she was embarrassed? Did Seth ever get the chance to see her covered in dirt after working in the garden? Had Seth ever brought her to this same pond for an impromptu picnic?

  You need to tell her the truth.

  The voice that had warned him so many times before resounded in the back of his mind. It was time. He couldn’t wait any longer. He was already deeply attached to Veronica, and he needed to be upfront and honest with her. Veronica deserved his honesty.

  “Are you ready for pie?” she asked.

  “Ya, I’m always ready for your pie. Mamm will understand if we don’t eat the cookies she gave me.”

  She cut each of them a piece, and they both started eating.

  “You were right about the weather this week,” she commented. “It hasn’t rained yet.”

  He brushed his napkin across his mouth. “That was more a comment about how I feel lately rather than about the weather.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked.

  “Lately I’ve been in such a gut mood that I wouldn’t care if it rained.” Jason forked another bite of pie into his mouth.

  Veronica smiled as she pushed her fork through her piece. “I know what you mean.”

  He felt elated as he finished eating.

  “Do you still want to go for a walk?” Veronica asked.

  “Yes, I do.” Jason packed up the food and stowed the basket and quilt in the buggy. “Are you ready?”

  “Ya.” Veronica brushed her hands down her apron.

  “You look perfect,” he told her.

  She gave him a shy smile. “Danki.”

  “Let’s enjoy this schee day.” He held out his hand, and she hesitated for a short moment. But then she took it, and they walked side by side around the pond. He enjoyed the warm, soft feel of her small hand in his. The day couldn’t be any more perfect.

  “Remember how I told you I dreamed about Seth a lot?” she asked, looking out over the pond.

  Jason’s shoulders tensed at the sound of his friend’s name. “Ya, I do.”

  “I used to dream I was trying to save him or I was cemented in one spot while he was falling. I’d wake up sobbing and feeling guilty for not being able to save his life. Those nightmares have stopped.” Veronica smiled up at him. “I think it’s because of you.”

  Guilt squeezed at his chest. “I need to tell you something.”

  “What?” Her eyes sparkled with curiosity in the afternoon sun.

  “I know how you feel.”

  “What do you mean?” She searched his eyes.

  He had to tell her. But what would she think of him after she knew the truth? Would she ever trust him again? He studied her. He couldn’t stand th
e thought of losing her, not after their friendship had progressed this far.

  Her expression crumpled. “Is something wrong?”

  “No.” He spotted purple asters growing next to a nearby tree. He picked four of them and handed them to her. “You’ve taken away my nightmares too.”

  Veronica held the flowers gingerly, as if they were made of glass, and smelled them. “They are so schee. Danki.”

  Why was he such a coward? She deserved to know the truth. He opened his mouth to tell her.

  Veronica looked up at him again. “I’ve had a wonderful time this afternoon, but I need to get back and help with the chores.” “I understand,” Jason said. “I’ve kept you away long enough.”

  VERONICA HELD ON TO THE FLOWERS AS THEY WALKED back to the buggy together. She climbed into the passenger side and smiled over at Jason as he took the reins. Jason kept his eyes on the road, and his expression remained pensive. Was something bothering him?

  But then he reached over and squeezed her hand. “Danki for letting me steal you away this afternoon.”

  “Danki for rescuing me from my chores.” Veronica looked out the window and breathed in the warm, fresh air. “I can’t believe next week will be September. The summer went by quickly.”

  “Ya, it did,” he agreed.

  Veronica smelled the beautiful purple flowers and closed her eyes. The afternoon had been perfect. Her heart was bursting with . . . love?

  Was she falling in love with Jason?

  The question gripped her heart. Was it too soon to feel this way? Should they know each other longer before feeling this deep connection? Could he possibly love her too? He’d told her the weather always seemed sunny to him now. Did he say that as a way of telling her he loved her?

  Veronica stole a quick glance at Jason and found him staring at the road in front of them. She longed to ask him how he felt about her, but her intuition told her he felt the same way. After all, he’d brought her gifts, and he even left work early today to see her. Of course he loved her.