Until Forever (Women of Prayer)

by Shortridge, Darlene

  Until Forever

  ©2010 by

  Darlene Shortridge

  Published by TreasureLine Publishing

  All rights reserved.

  Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.

  Kindle Edition License Notes

  This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only or provided by the author or publisher, please purchase your own copy out of respect for the author's work.

  The following is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are fictitious or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, to factual events or to businesses is coincidental and unintentional. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views or thoughts of the publisher. The author has represented and warranted full ownership and/or legal right to publish all the materials in this book.

  Cover Design: Linda Boulanger

  http://www.TellTaleBookCovers.weebly.com/

  Interior Layout: Amanda Stephan

  http://www.BooksByAmanda.com

  Published by: TreasureLine Publishing

  http://www.treasurelinepublishing.com/index.html

  Also available in Paperback

  Darlene’s Website: http://www.darleneshortridge.com/

  Dedication

  ***

  To Daniel,

  my Until Forever partner,

  friend and love.

  Praise for Until Forever

  “I can categorically state that Until Forever is not normally the type of book I would pick up. That said, I really enjoyed it! Darlene is an extremely gifted and exciting new author. Her story of a family suffering and growing and changing manages to leap beyond the clichés of the genre and stand as an original work. I look forward to more from her in the coming years.”

  —Cliff Graham, Author of Day of War

  “Until Forever, by Darlene Shortridge, is an incredible journey that pulls the reader into a world of emotions that can only be described as absolutely powerful. Often, beauty comes from tragedy, as well as the compelling truth about the power of prayer, the freedom of forgiveness, and the love of God. I urge everyone to read this book because it gives the reader an opportunity to experience the love of God through the heart and soul of a parent, the kind of love that will last Until Forever.”

  —S.B. Newman, Author of The Night Eagles Soared

  “Until Forever delves into the difficult realms of reconciliation, redemption, and forgiveness. Shortridge illustrates a story that is at times poignant and compelling. I found myself vicariously experiencing Jessi and Mark’s tragic loss and desperately wanted them to be fully healed and restored. If you battle with the perception that you are unconditionally loved and forgiven by God, this novel is for you.”

  —Jeral Davis, Author of Tomorrow

  “Until Forever has made me stop and realize that God’s timing is perfect, unlike ours. What happens in our life today defines Gods greatness. The things good and bad are used to bring you closer to him. Great story, very deep!”

  —Kathy Kelly, Assistant Worship Leader

  “Darlene Shortridge is a talented new writer who brings a lot of creativity to the craft. Her compelling cadence drew me from one page to another, and I found it hard to put her book down. Until Forever is one of those captivating books that will inspire you as well as entertain.”

  —Marilyn Jackson, Former Editor, Women’s Speaker, Pastor’s Wife

  “Darlene Shortridge has written a wonderful book. Until Forever is the kind of book that the reader can invest himself into. I found myself wondering how I would react in the same circumstances. Would I hold onto grief in the same way, or would I be able to move on with my life? How would I handle forgiveness? I think it is the mark of a good book when the reader is able to move past the story and make life decisions for himself. Until Forever is a thoughtful book with a great message. The storyline is compelling, and I found the book hard to put down. I recommend that you add Until Forever to your reading list.”

  —Elaine Littau, Author of Nan’s Journey

  Acknowledgments

  There are many people who cross a person’s path through the course of their lifetime. Some of those people have such a profound impact that said person will never be the same. I am blessed to have many, many people who hold that place of honor in my life, too many to mention by name. You already know who you are and how much I appreciate you.

  I would like to recognize a few people for their encouragement, hard work and talent. First off, a giant thank you to all my new friends on facebook and twitter. You guys have been amazing!

  A big thank you to Amanda Stephan…I mean squirrel…for all her hard work, her amazing friendship and…squirrel…her uncompromising example of a faith that sticks! And she is a fabulous formatter to boot!

  I’d like to thank my Sisters’ In Cahoots for their support and for being there when I need a shoulder. You gals are the bomb! Elaine Littau, you have been there for the past two years, answering every question, being a prayer partner and a friend. I could not ask for a dearer friend. Everyone in the Word and Pen Writer’s Group…you have pushed me to be a better writer and examine every word I write. To the ladies from my Bible study at St. Thomas Episcopal Church, your desire to become everything God wants you to be coupled with your amazing support leave me speechless. Your resolve at remaining true to God’s Word, in the midst of turmoil, is an example I will always hold near. You are those friends in our current study; you know the ones I am talking about!

  Deb…you are the sister of my heart. Love you! Jeanna…never forget…compassion and mercy are at the very heart of God. You are an example to us all! Love you! Barb…your heart is simply amazing. I will continue to pray for you, I know you are praying for me. Love you! Ed and Kathy Kelly, Wayne and Marlene Cornwell, John Shortridge, thank you for your belief in this project. Your prayers and support are greatly appreciated!

  Linda Boulanger from Treasureline Books & Publishing…thanks for taking me on! The cover rocks! You outdid yourself!

  Alvin Shortridge…aka Dad…aka Elvis…thank you for teaching me to dream!

  Jeremiah, there is no better son anywhere! True story!

  Jonna, the past year has been the hardest year of your young life. God does not make mistakes. You are an amazing young woman/girl and He has a great plan for your life! The writer in you is coming out…I can tell! I love you with all my heart!

  Danny, I cannot imagine traveling on this journey that God has set before us with anyone but you. You are everything I am not. You balance me. You complete me. The past ten years with you have been the best years of my life. I love you more and more each day. Thank you for everything you are!

  I serve an amazing God. He gives me the desires of my heart. He has allowed me to walk in my calling and write for Him. Everything I do, I do for the Glory of Him who has called me. It is a privilege to be your daughter. Thank you!

  Foreword

  My husband and I served as pastors for approximately thirty years. Of all the people we worked with, met, and led during those years, some people seem to stand out. Darlene is
one of those people.

  She was and is created by God to be a communicator. She comes from at least three generations of anointed professional quality communicators, both in music and the Word of God. We have had the privilege, and sometimes-great challenge, of walking with her family members.

  Even though Until Forever is a work of fiction, the characters could easily be real people, in real circumstances, experiencing real tragedy. Just like real life, they have the opportunity to find answers to their questions and obtain victory. Many of the experiences the characters go through parallel Darlene’s walk through life—times she has had to endure, walk through, cry through, fight through, and come out the other side of much wiser with a deeper faith, restored joy, and a fresh love of people and the Lord.

  You are going to see yourself in this writing, as I did, and who knows what new insight you will gain or what the Lord might whisper to you as you walk with the characters through this journey entitled Until Forever.

  —Linda K. Johnson, retired pastor’s wife

  Chapter 1

  Jessi Jensen watched as her husband rubbed her son’s hair, and grinned.

  “We’ll be fine. Don’t worry so much. Go on. I’ll even have supper ready for you when you get home.”

  Jessi couldn’t help but show apprehension. After all, Mark had just spent six months in rehab. He hadn’t taken a drink in over six months, and he was Ethan’s dad, but could she trust him? She had learned the hard way a long time ago that trust was a word she could not use in the same sentence with her husband’s name.

  Mark walked over and smiled at his wife. “Honey, I’m done with all that stuff. I love you. I love Ethan. There’s nothing I would do to risk your love or jeopardize our lives together. Please believe me. We’ll be okay. I promise.”

  Jessi bent down to give her son a hug and kiss. They rubbed noses, and Ethan giggled. “Mommy, you always do that.”

  “What does it mean, Ethan?” Jessi asked, her eyes shining with the threat of tears. Her love for her child overwhelmed her. She’d never had anything in her life that meant so much to her. Not Blackie, the lab her parents had finally permitted her to have when she was six, nor Miranda, her favorite doll that she took to bed with her each night as a child. Nothing she could have ever imagined or experienced could have prepared her for the love she would pour out for this child.

  Ethan looked up with an expression you wouldn’t expect from a four-year-old. “It means that I love you and you love me until forever, Mama. Just like Jesus. Right, Mama?”

  “Yes, sweetheart. Until forever I will love you. Always remember that, Ethan—until forever.” Jessi rose from her place next to her son and managed a half smile for her husband. “Take care of him, Mark. I’ll see you around four thirty.”

  She grabbed her school bag and headed out to a cold car with a feeling of dread. If only she had faith like Aunt Merry and her little Ethan, then maybe this wouldn’t be so difficult. She closed her eyes for a brief second and tried to pray. Nothing. It would never change. God didn’t help losers like her, and he certainly didn’t have time to listen to her whining.

  She could see why God loved Aunt Merry and Ethan. Of all the people in the world, these were the two she loved the most. Who wouldn’t love them? They were the kind of people who inspired others just by watching them. They didn’t have to speak a word. The love within them said it all. One look into their eyes, and a person experienced a sense of peace. Aunt Merry had her wisdom and unconditional love, and Ethan with his wide-eyed wonder and innocence. The sound of pelting ice pulled her out of her reverie.

  Great! Freezing rain again, she thought. I’ll have to call Mark and tell him if he’s going out to be careful. I am so sick of these Oklahoma winters.

  She slowly pulled out of the driveway and headed to Roosevelt Elementary School, where she taught a classroom full of third graders. Her mind quickly shifted to the task at hand: making it to school in one piece. Why school hadn’t already been called off, she couldn’t fathom. “Nothing to do now but keep on going,” she muttered to herself. “Tomorrow the sun will be out, and it’ll be sixty. Crazy January weather. A couple more miles and I am home free, at least until school is out.”

  Driving slow did have its advantages, Jessi reminded herself. Lately she was in too much of a hurry to take the time to look at the stately old homes that surrounded her school. Someday she would love to live in a house like one of these—two-story, brick homes with white shutters and brick sidewalks leading up to big front doors with brass knockers; front porches, with porch swings, that spanned the entire front of the house. Some of the homes still had Christmas decorations up. Big, fresh green wreaths with red bows hanging from second-story balconies and candles lit in every window. Even brightly colored lanterns with little tea lights graced the steps to a few of the homes.

  One night she had taken Ethan on a Christmas-light drive, and she purposely drove through this neighborhood. She had fallen in love with the lanterns and the candles, all the decorations, really. Something about a candle in a window made a place feel inviting, like you could go in and sit by a fire with a mug of hot chocolate and a good book. The tree would be brightly lit with gifts underneath and a train track running completely around it. Antique glass ornaments of all shapes and sizes would hang from each limb, and an angel would grace the top, watching over her keep. She could still picture the look on Ethan’s face as he took it all in. He was in awe over everything. Ethan had his favorites too: the snowmen with eyes of coal and carrot noses, Santas and reindeer on rooftops, and oh, the lights—bright white lights, blue ones, or all the multi-colored sets. He couldn’t get enough of them. Some flickered, and some raced along. Faster and faster, just like his race cars at home. He even rounded out the scene with his own sound effects—zoom, zoom. What surprised her most was when he wanted to stop the car and get out for a nativity scene. “Mom, please,” he’d pleaded, and she’d never been able to deny those eyes when he really put his all into it. They stopped for a little while, and she watched as he went from life-sized camel to cow to lamb. He would stand at each piece for a minute or two. Finally, he ended up at the manger. When he knelt down on his knees and bowed his head, tears formed in her eyes. Normally, she took his faith with a grain of salt, knowing he was a four-year-old boy who was greatly influenced by his great-aunt Merry, who watched him while Jessi was working. This time she did not know why she let this simple act of obedience to a God she refused to serve bother her.

  On occasion when Jessi would let herself drift, she liked to think about what others had and what she was lacking. On occasion she became quite maudlin, and she forgot exactly what she had to be thankful for. It usually happened when something in her life was considerably stressful. She would find herself wandering, daydreaming about living in someone else’s life or the “once upon a time” dreams she had had and how far away she was from seeing them become a reality.

  Maybe this time Mark would be able to stay dry and hold down a job. Her own salary was steady, but it wouldn’t allow her to live in a neighborhood like this one or eventually get that great play set Ethan had wanted for Christmas. Money was always just a little too tight. Expectations were always a little too high, and too many times reality was a bit too much of a letdown. She’d done her best for Ethan with Christmas this year. She found him a great refurbished two-wheeler in the perfect colors: blue and red. It had tassels hanging from the handlebars and a horn that he just loved honking. But she wanted to do more. She’d loved their little house when they first bought it. She knew it would be a first home, and she was okay with that. They would fix it up little by little, and as their family grew, they would move into something bigger and start the process again and again until they were in their dream house. Where did all those dreams go?

  I guess the ice is giving everyone a hard time this morning, she thought as she pulled into an empty parking lot. The only other car was Principal Davies’. She half skated across the parking lot as she made
her way to the school building. The sound of silence that greeted her as she walked in the door was altogether unnatural for a school. At the very least she should have heard teachers chatting among themselves, chalk clicking upon chalkboards in preparation for a day of learning, and the sound of a typewriter emanating from the office as Julie, the school secretary, typed memos from her perch behind the counter. Nothing but silence.

  “Hello, is anyone here?” Jessi yelled out, knowing full well that Dr. Davies was somewhere in the building.

  Not only was his car in the parking lot, but the doors were unlocked. At least the teachers’ entrance was.

  “Jessi? Is that you?” Dr. Davies rounded the corner, probably coming from the copy room. “Didn’t you receive my message? I left a message on your voicemail that school had been cancelled for today. This ice storm is going to be a killer.”

  Jessi groaned and glanced outside. She had forgotten to charge her cell phone. Her windshield looked like one of those glass block showers. Everything was out of focus. Heading straight home now would definitely be a problem. At the very least, the roads wouldn’t be drivable until the rain stopped. She wasn’t sure if the city even owned salt or sand spreaders, let alone was able to pay someone enough to risk their lives trying to save someone else’s. Probably not.

  The words “Looks like I’ll be getting caught up on some of my grading today,” managed to escape from her lips, when all she really wanted to do was get back in her car and head home. She resigned herself to her day, even though her heart screamed for a second chance. If only she had checked the messages before she and Mark had their semi-argument she would be at home right now having breakfast with her son. If only. Her life thus far had been a series of “if onlys.” If only Mom and Dad had loved each other enough to stay together. If only I had listened to the voices in my past telling me that Mark was nothing but trouble. No, that’s not right. Then I wouldn’t have Ethan, and I would do anything for Ethan…even marry Mark again.