Hate to Love You

by Jennifer Sucevic

  All of the tension that had previously drained from my body is back in full force. Brody’s father is an imposing man. He’s just as tall and broad as his son. Although his hair is dark where Brody’s is golden.

  Where Brody has a playfulness about him, this man does not. He’s all business. He spears his food with his fork, chewing methodically. When our eyes meet across the table, I quickly lower mine to my plate. The manner in which he watches me is assessing.

  I’m not sure what to think of him. And I have no idea what he thinks of me. Although, if I had to take a stab, I’d guess that he doesn’t think much. It’s not anything specific. Just a vibe I’m getting.

  One that could be wrong.

  “Brody tells us that you’ll be finishing up at Whitmore in the spring,” John says.

  Grateful for the lifeline he’s throwing me, I latch onto it with both hands. “Yes, I’ll be graduating with a degree in personal finance. I’m trying to decide if I should apply to graduate school right away or take a few years off and work.”

  It’s gruffly that he says, “Getting real-life experience is always beneficial. You can learn all the theory you want in the classroom, but when it comes down to it, you have to know how to apply everything you’ve learned in the real world. As someone who has a staff of over forty, I would never hire someone who doesn’t have at least some experience.”

  I nod. “That’s what my mom says as well. She thinks I should work for a while and then apply to grad school.”

  “I know it’s still early, but have you started searching for jobs? Do you have any idea what you’re looking for?”

  “Last summer, I interned with a personal finance company. They’ve offered to hire me once I graduate.”

  He nods. “Getting your foot in the door is oftentimes the hardest part. Did you work in the area?”

  With every question he volleys at me, my nerves continue to escalate. “Yes, I was lucky enough to find something local through school, and I lived at home for the summer. I’m still planning to put my application in at other companies, but it’s nice knowing I already have something I can count on if nothing else pans out. And what’s nice about the company I interned with is that they have offices all over the country, so I can stay here or transfer somewhere else.”

  Everything turns silent again as John spears a piece of cantaloupe with his fork and lifts it to his mouth. His eyes stay focused on me to the point of discomfort. I have to squelch the urge to squirm on my chair. I get the feeling that he doesn’t want me with his son.

  “Much like Brody, it sounds like you have everything mapped out for yourself.” Releasing me from his penetrating stare, his gaze shifts to his son. And just like that, I’m dismissed. “We need to set up another weekend trip to Milwaukee and take a closer look at housing options for next year. I thought we could check out a few more condos near the lakefront. I’ll forward the listings Dana sent over.” He pulls his phone out and glances at the calendar that pops up. “It needs to happen soon. There won’t be time once the season gets underway.”

  Brody nods, working his way through his loaded-down plate of food. It still amazes me how much he can pack away. “Once I get back to the house, I’ll look at my school and hockey schedules and get back to you.”

  John glances at him and adds, “I want to have something on the books by the end of the week.” His tone doesn’t brook any arguments.

  Nerves hum along my skin, but Brody seems unfazed by it. “Okay.” I get the feeling that it’s John’s way or the highway.

  Amber regales the table with stories about Haley and what a little devil she’s turning out to be as she slams headfirst into the terrible twos. Brody slips his hand around mine under the table. When I sneak a peek at him, he winks and smiles. I don’t know why that simple gesture is able to dissolve the building tension in me, but it does.

  I jump as a loud wail pierces the quietness of the sunroom.

  “It appears that our little ray of sunshine has woken from her nap.” Amber rises smoothly from her chair and glances at me. “If you’re finished eating, Natalie, you’re welcome to join me upstairs. Hailey likes to play in her room for about ten or fifteen minutes before coming downstairs.”

  “Thank you, I’d like that.” I try to keep the relief from my voice. I don’t want to offend Brody’s dad, but I’m grateful for the chance to escape his intimidating presence. Even though he hasn’t necessarily been staring, I feel like he’s been watching us closely. Brody holding my hand beneath the table has not evaded his notice.

  I give Brody a small smile and follow Amber out of the sunroom. I don’t realize just how stifling the room has grown until I leave it behind.

  “We’ll be back in about fifteen minutes,” Amber says.

  “Take your time,” is John’s response.

  When I glance over my shoulder, I catch Brody’s eyes and blow him a little kiss. He grins as I turn the corner.

  I’m happy that he brought me here, but I’ll be equally glad when we leave.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Brody

  As Amber and Natalie climb the staircase to the second floor, Dad clears his throat and says, “She’s a lovely girl.”

  Something sours in my gut, and I almost laugh. “But?”

  Because there is most definitely a but coming.

  He sighs and sets his fork on his plate. “Buuut,” he says, drawing out the word. “You have enough going on without getting wrapped up in a girl. This is your last season before moving to the pros. Your focus needs to be on hockey and school, not getting into the pants of some pretty girl.”

  Maybe I was naïve, but I’d hoped that once Dad met Natalie, he would understand that she’s not some puck bunny I spent Saturday night with. Natalie is different. She’s smart, gorgeous, amazing. She has her shit together. And for some odd reason, she wants me.

  Unfortunately, I now see I made a mistake. Dad isn’t interested in getting to know the girl I’m falling for.

  He’s concerned she’ll get in the way.

  Annoyed with the way he’s starting out this conversation, I say, “Natalie isn’t a distraction. If anything, she’s helping me with the classes I’m having trouble with.” I shift on my chair and quietly admit, “I told her about the dyslexia. She’s making copies of the notes she takes in class—”

  “Your professors already do that, don’t they?” He doesn’t look impressed.

  “Yeah, but hers are more detailed. She’s made notecards for me to study from and has researched other methods that can help me.”

  Does he have the slightest fucking clue what that means to me?

  I don’t make a habit of discussing my learning issues with anyone. I hide it like a dirty little secret. Natalie is the first person I’ve been completely open with. Not even Sawyer, Luke, or Cooper know, and they’re my closest friends.

  He disregards my words, shrugging them off. “You can hire tutors for that. Hell, you can even fuck them if you want.” His voice hardens. “What you don’t do is get emotionally attached to them.” He shakes his head like I’m a child who refuses to see reason. “Now isn’t the time. There’s too much at stake to risk fucking it up.”

  I crush the paper napkin in my hand until it’s nothing more than a tight ball.

  Dad and I rarely butt heads. After Mom died and before Amber came into the picture, it was just the two of us. His life revolved around me. I realize that he has my best interests at heart, but still…I want him to give Natalie a fair shot. I want him to see just how good she is for me.

  I sit back on my chair. “Look, I didn’t plan for this to happen, but it did. Natalie is important to me. I won’t let her go. I can handle everything, it won’t be a problem.”

  Changing tactics, he says, “I spoke with Lang the other day.”

  Aw, hell. I know what’s coming. My father has always been two steps ahead of me.

  When I remain silent, he continues. “You got into a fight at practice with Reed Collins?�
��

  I lock my jaw. “Yep.”

  He angles his head. Anger brews in his eyes. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but that’s the same guy you punched at a party about a month ago, right?”

  I slump on my chair. Since he already seems to be privy to everything, there’s no point in trying to cover it up. “Yeah, that’s him.”

  “Why?”

  I arch a brow. “Why did I punch him?”

  Dad leans forward, resting his elbows on the table. “What I’d like to know is if Natalie had any bearing on your decision to punch him.”

  Fuck.

  I shrug. “Does it matter? Reed is an asshole. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to hit him.”

  “But you didn’t, did you?” He stabs a finger at me. “You were able to contain it and channel the energy elsewhere.”

  I grit my teeth.

  “I think we both know the reason behind it matters. And my guess is that you hitting him has everything to do with that girl.”

  Backed into a corner, I snap, “So what if it does? Reed and I have never seen eye to eye, and that’s never going to change.”

  “Maybe not. But you’ve never gotten into a physical altercation with him before she came into your life.”

  I shake my head and repeat stubbornly, “Reed is a douchebag—”

  “That might be true, but he’s your teammate. And you don’t fucking get into it with your teammates, because that shit always bleeds over onto the ice. You’re trying to bring home a National Championship this season. How does the animosity you feel for one another help to achieve that goal?”

  I blow out a measured breath and try to wrangle my feelings under control. “Natalie has nothing to do with Reed Collins.”

  “Lang sees a difference in you. He’s concerned. You’re not looking as sharp as you did last year.”

  Shocked by his words, I fall back on my chair. “There’s no reason to be concerned.”

  “I’m not going to argue about this. Natalie seems like a nice girl, but she needs to go.”

  I stare as his words reverberate in my head.

  “There’ll be plenty of time after you make your move to Milwaukee for relationships, if that’s what you want. You have seven and a half months left at Whitmore and then you’ll be moving on. And from everything she said, so will she. There’s no point in pouring your energies into something that has little chance of working out. Not when those energies could be better served by focusing on your career.”

  Unwilling to listen to another word, I bolt upward. The chair scrapes along the marble, nearly tumbling backward as I do. “I care about Natalie. She’s the first girl who has ever meant something to me. I’m not going to break up with her.”

  Everything about this conversation pisses me off. All I wanted was for Dad to give Natalie a chance and he’s unwilling to do that.

  Well, fuck him.

  Dad rises so we’re eye level. “You need to calm down and think about what I’ve said.” He lowers his voice, trying to sound rational. “I only have your best interests in mind, Brody. I want to see all these years of hard work pay off.” He adds in a softer tone, “Your mother would be so proud of everything you’ve accomplished. It’s important that you finish your last year strong. I want you to be a force to be reckoned with out on the ice. This isn’t the time to let up on the gas.” He reaches out and lays a hand on my shoulder.

  Even though I want to shrug him off, I don’t.

  “Think about what I’ve said. I don’t want to see you make a mistake you’ll end up regretting for the rest of your life.”

  “I won’t.” With that, I walk out of the sunroom. Just as I reach the foyer, I hear Natalie’s voice. My feet grind to a halt as she walks down the staircase. Our eyes catch. She smiles, looking a lot more relaxed than she did when we arrived at the house. I’ll have to text Amber later and thank her for putting Natalie at ease. She has no idea how much I appreciate it.

  I hadn’t realized just how much Natalie’s come to mean to me until Dad told me she needed to go. I’m not breaking up with her. If Coach thinks my game is slipping, that just means I need to work harder. I can handle hockey, school, and a relationship with Natalie.

  Even though I don’t feel like smiling, I force my lips into some semblance of one. “You ready to take off?”

  “Sure.” Natalie’s gaze roves over me. Her eyes sharpen as if she realizes something is wrong. The last thing I want is for her to catch a whiff of the conversation I had with Dad. It would only upset her. And that, I’m not willing to do.

  When I threw the invitation out there for brunch, I knew she was nervous. Her mother is easygoing and laid-back which is the opposite of my father. He has a foreboding presence. He spent years honing that persona on the ice and then in the conference room, using it to his advantage. I don’t think he was rude to Natalie, but I felt her discomfort as if it were my own.

  At this point, I’m sorry I brought her home to meet him.

  It’s not a mistake I’ll make again.

  “Oh, you’re leaving already?” Amber seems genuinely disappointed to see us go. Hailey squirms in her arms.

  As I smile at my little sister, some of my anger dissipates. “Yeah, we both have work to finish up before Monday.”

  When Natalie comes to stand by my side, I slip her hand into mine.

  Our eyes meet and hold, a silent communication passing between us. I’ve never experienced that with anyone else.

  I squeeze her fingers.

  Dad joins us in the entryway. He turns to Natalie, and I stiffen, half-afraid he’ll say something to her himself. That he’ll try to reason with her since I refuse to listen.

  As he extends his hand for her to shake, Natalie steps forward with her own.

  “It was nice meeting you, Natalie,” he says. “We enjoyed getting to know you.”

  “Thank you for inviting me,” she replies.

  “Good luck with your job search. We wish you all the best.”

  “Thank you.”

  When Dad meets my gaze again, he merely gives me a nod. “Let me know what your schedule looks like.”

  “I’ll text you,” I reply stiffly.

  I’m pissed that at twenty-three years of age, he thinks he can tell me to get rid of someone I want in my life. Hopefully, he realizes that it’s not going to happen. Natalie is here to stay. Whether he likes it or not.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Brody

  The next week flies by. I blink and almost miss it. There are tests to study for and assignments to finish typing. I swear I spend as much time hunkered down on the third floor of the library with Natalie as I do busting my ass in the arena. I make sure that when I skate off the ice at the end of each practice, I’m leaving everything I have out there.

  Contrary to what my dad thinks, it’s important for me to finish this year strong. I know exactly what hinges upon it. I haven’t lost sight of my goals and what I need to do to reach them. The only difference is that Natalie now factors into those plans.

  Reed and I haven’t had any further run-ins. I’m not looking to start shit with him, but I’m also not hiding out in a corner hoping to avoid that asshole either. If he needs another beatdown, so he better understands his place in the pecking order, I’d be more than happy to deliver it.

  Fuck that guy.

  I don’t want to waste another brain cell thinking about Reed Collins.

  So, I’ll focus on Natalie instead. I spend as much time with her as I can, but it’s not nearly enough to satisfy the growing need I have for her.

  Without us discussing it, I end up at her place every night. I know she doesn’t want to be at the hockey house. And I can’t blame her for that. Most of the time, I don’t want to be there either. Every night is a party with people passed out on the couch and beer cans strewn about the tables. I’m over it. Cooper and Sawyer have given me some shit about being pussy-whipped, but Luke gets it. Half the time, he’s hauling ass out of Zara’s bedro
om at five in the morning to make practice like I am.

  I wish Dad could understand that Natalie has changed everything for me. We’ve spoken a few times on the phone, and the Milwaukee trip is in the works, but he hasn’t brought up the subject of Natalie again. We’re both avoiding the issue.

  I’m hopeful that if I give it a little time and don’t push matters, he’ll see for himself that I’m not going to fuck everything up because I’m dating someone. That’s the plan. This thing with Natalie has taken me completely by surprise, and now that she’s in my life, I can’t imagine one without her.

  I turn my head and stare at her. Fuck, she’s gorgeous. Like seriously, take-my-breath-away gorgeous. All that long silky hair is fanned out against the ivory pillowcase. Her lips are full and pouty, ripe for kissing. I’m tempted to lean over and nip them.

  Sometimes I can’t believe she wants to be with me. Natalie could have any guy she wants. She’s smart and gorgeous. And that fucking mouth of hers…

  God, but I love that sassy-ass mouth.

  It’s always been a turn-on. Looking back at all the shit we used to give to each other, I think it was all foreplay leading up to this.

  I roll toward her and gently press my lips against hers, wanting to wake her with a kiss. Is that cheesy as hell?

  You bet your ass, it is.

  But I don’t care.

  I’m that guy now, so deal with it.

  I press soft butterfly kisses across her face until her eyelids flutter and she focuses on me. A smile spreads across her face.

  “Morning,” she says. Her voice is all low and husky.

  “Morning,” I whisper in return.

  I playfully snag her bottom lip between my teeth and tug it until she giggles.

  My hands glide across her naked breasts until I’m able to cup their warm weight in my palms. A purring noise rumbles from deep in her throat as she arches her body against the hold I have on her. God, but I love how responsive she is.