Arousal

by Simone Sowood

  “It’s perfect. I couldn’t think of a better place to settle down in.”

  Collin put his arm around me and swung me around in the huge wood paneled entrance hall.

  “Stop it,” I said, laughing.

  He tugged my hand and we walked deeper into his new house. Only three streets away from Abbie’s house, it was a supersized house like all the other mansions in the exclusive gated community.

  It proved Collin really did intend to settle down for good once and for all. Not that I’d ever doubted him, not after Hawaii.

  “Hold on, I want to show you the best bit.”

  “What’s that?”

  “You’ll see, patience.”

  I followed him into the dining room, my heart stopped when I stepped through the door. Candles flickered on the table in the otherwise dark room. We’d already eaten dinner at Dish, but Collin insisted we didn’t have dessert. Now I knew why. Set side by side, two plates held an assortment of my favorite desserts. Chocolate dipped strawberries, chocolate mousse, lemon meringue pie and mini cherry cheesecakes.

  Collin’s mouth lit up in the biggest smile I’d seen on him since before Blake took Harlan. Something was up. Open mouthed, my heart pounded in my ears while I waited for him to speak.

  “I thought we’d have dessert here,” he said, pulling me into him.

  “It looks delicious.”

  He turned me to face him, the light flickering across his face. “Baby, I thought I’d do this after dessert, but I can’t wait any longer.” Collin smoothed my hair away from my face and took my hands in his. Our eyes locked. “I need you in my life, I want this to be your house as much as mine. Move in with me. Marry me.”

  I flung my arms around him, blinking back the tears in my eyes and swallowing the lump to speak. “Oh god yes, a million times yes.”

  Our mouths met in a crushing kiss as we pulled at each other’s clothes. We forgot all about dessert. We scrambled down the hall, leaving a trail of clothing. When we reached the grand staircase, Collin swept me off the floor and carried me up the steps in his arms. He laid me on the bed, and made such sweet love to me that I cried when I orgasmed.

  Afterwards, I lay in his arms in the black leather bed. Collin lifted his arm off me and jumped out of bed.

  “What’s going on? Where are you going?”

  “I forgot something, wait here.” He said as he jogged through the bedroom door.

  I lie there, imagining our wedding. We could have it in my hometown in Maine. An outdoor wedding next fall, right when the trees glowed in reds and oranges. Or here in Chicago, in a hotel. Maybe the Four Seasons since we have a connection to it. Neither seemed right; I decided I’d have to consider more.

  Collin rushed through the door, not stopping until he’d flopped back on the bed. He flicked on the crystal bedside lamp.

  “I meant to give you this in the dining room, but you distracted me,” he said with a wide, perfect smile that creased around his piercing eyes.

  My hand shook as I took the little box.

  “It’s different. If you don’t like it we can change it.”

  I flicked my eyes from the box up to Collin and back to the box. Whatever type of ring he’d chosen was what I’d want. The fact that it was from him mattered more than the actual type and style. I opened the box.

  At first I didn’t understand, I’d never seen anything like it before. The huge solitaire in a platinum setting was gorgeous, but what was it?

  “It’s a yellow diamond, I chose it to match your eyes. But if you’d prefer a traditional diamond, we can change it.”

  “No, I love it. It’s beautiful. And so thoughtful.” The box dropped out of my hand, landing on the bed as I’d hugged him.

  Collin picked up the box and took out the ring. I offered him my left hand, and he slid the perfectly sized ring onto my finger.

  “Let’s see,” he said, lifting my hand to my face. “Not quite as beautiful as your eyes, but close.”

  “I love you.”

  He brought his head close to mine and cupped my cheek. Our lips connected in a closed mouth kiss. And another before our lips parted and we sleepily kissed.

  Exhausted from a long day at work, followed by an incredible evening full of surprises, we snuggled together. My eyes shut and I drifted.

  “Shit,” I said bolting up.

  “What?”

  “I can’t stay here, I need to go to the home to get my pills.”

  Collin remained silent, his breathing heavy. In the filtered light from outside, I could see him looking up at me. He tugged on my arm, pulling me back down to the bed.

  I leaned into him, our chests pressed together, and he put his lips close to my ear and in a low voice said, “What do you think about not taking them anymore?”

  “What do you mean?” I asked, thought I’m sure I knew.

  “You know what I mean. Stop taking them, not use anything. I know what you want most, and I want to give that to you. It’s what I want too.”

  My eyes welled with tears. I swallowed and asked, “How did you know?”

  “Your mom told me.”

  Why am I not surprised? But for once, her meddling brought me to this conversation right now. My breath quickened as the situation sank in. “If you’re sure.”

  “More sure than I’ve ever been of anything.”

  “I love you,” I said kissing him.

  “I love you too.

  I laid back down beside him and closed my eyes, imagining the future with Collin in this house.

  “Daniel.” Collin’s voice woke me the following morning.

  “No fucking way,” he said into the phone as he bolted out of bed.

  I sat up, watching him for a signal. He tossed the phone down on his pillow.

  “What’s going on?” I asked.

  “Blake. He’s decided he doesn’t want Harlan after all. Said it cramps his lifestyle too much.”

  “Oh my god,” I said, jumping out of bed and pulling on my clothes from last night.

  “Yeah, according to Liv he hasn’t even seen him in a week.”

  “Sounds like he’s as good a parent as Raylene.”

  “Guess they were a match made in heaven.”

  “Can you get him back?”

  “Daniel’s already arranging the papers for a full adoption by me. It’ll take months to finalize, but in the meantime Harlan’s going to live here. Liv’s bringing him here, she’s already on her way.”

  “Already? That’s so fast.” I shook my head and closed my eyes, clearing my head. Yesterday morning I went to work single and living in a one bedroom apartment. Today I woke up engaged living in a mansion, and soon living with a baby.

  Collin brushed the back of his hand down my cheek and pulled me close to him.

  “Baby, this is a big thing, I understand if your answer is no.”

  “What? I’m not going anywhere if that’s what you’re thinking.”

  “I love you.” He stroked my hair before pulling back, his dark eyes locking on mine. “How do feel about being a joint adoptive parent?”

  “What? Holy fuck. Are you serious?” It hadn’t even occurred to me. When I fell asleep last night, I’d never in a million years have guessed I’d wake up and become a mother. But I planned to spend the rest of my life with Collin. And I didn’t just want to be Harlan’s stepmother.

  “You don’t have to decide now, think about it.”

  “There’s nothing to think about.“ I looked up at him, my chin trembling. “Harlan needs a mommy.”

  I fell into him, resting my head against his strong chest.

  Five months later…

  “You look stunning,” Abbie said, handing me my bouquet.

  Butterflies flapped like crazy in my tummy and I thought I’d throw up, though I don’t know if they were from nerves or the remains of morning sickness.

  We hadn’t told anyone about the pregnancy yet. We’d only just found out, and six weeks was too soon. I knew I should tell A
bbie, and I felt guilty I hadn’t, but we didn’t want to tempt fate.

  Strands of The Wedding March played by the string quartet ticked my ears and set off the butterflies again.

  “Ready, sweetheart?” My father asked, putting his arm out for me to take.

  I looped my arm through his, taking deep breaths to try and calm myself. Sam walked out first, followed by Marla and Abbie. Each of them wore summery, pale orange bridesmaid dresses. I loved them, and they looked even better with the gentle breeze billowing their skirts.

  Collin had flown Sarah Burton from London to Chicago to design them along with my wedding dress. I loved my dress even more than theirs, a strapless satin and lace dress that suited a beach setting.

  My father started walked, tugging me at first. I gathered myself and stayed with him. The one thing I’ve wanted in life, the thing I’d dreamed about for nearly a decade, was about to become a reality.

  We walked along the beach, from the gate and over the sand, between the rows of white folding chairs. The guests stood; I couldn’t see any faces through a sea of cameras and phones.

  My mother stood in the front row, dabbing her eyes with a Kleenex. As I passed her our eyes met, and I bit my cheeks to hold back my tears. We hadn’t told her about the pregnancy yet either. Although she doted on Harlan, adorable, amazing Harlan, and loved him like he was her blood. As did I.

  Collin and Daniel stood under the canopy that seemed to float in the sky. Daniel held Harlan, who looked delectable in his white shorts and a white silk top.

  My heart skipped when my eyes met Collin’s. He looked exquisite in his tux, his smile the broadest I’d seen since I showed him the results of the pregnancy test. I quickened my pace, wanting nothing more than to get to him.

  “Slow down.” My father held me back, allowing all the guests snapping photos to get a good shot of me.

  I didn’t know who most of them were. I didn’t care either. Collin invited many of the people he had befriended over the years, and they’d flown in from all over the world to attend our wedding. On their own dime. But Collin had insisted he, we, fly all my friends and family from Chicago and Maine and put them up at the Royal Hawaiian.

  We reached the canopy and Collin took my hands. The vows and the service seemed to go on forever, when all I wanted was for Collin to kiss me. At last the service came to a close and he leaned over and kissed me. The guests erupted in cheers as Collin pressed his hand into my back and his mouth deeper into mine.

  He released me, and I said “I love you.”

  “I love you, I’ve only ever loved you.”

  The End

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  Acknowledgments

  A HUGE thank you to my totally fabulous beta reading team, Emma, Sarah & Dawn, for all their suggestions, advice and support.