The Cowboy's Family

by Minton, Brenda

  He hadn’t expected her today. For the last week she’d been packing, loading boxes and getting the church staff ready to take over her many jobs. They didn’t have a new pastor, not yet. Wyatt and a few other men had prayed about the decision. For now they’d take turns preaching, just until they could find the right man.

  The dog left his side and ran to hers, tail wagging. Rachel reached to pet the animal. It followed her back to him. He glanced toward the house. Violet was inside with the girls. She’d been interviewing housekeepers. So far he and the girls hadn’t liked any of the candidates.

  “I didn’t expect to see you today.”

  She shrugged one shoulder and didn’t look directly at him. Her brown hair blew around her face and her expression seemed a little lost to him.

  “I hadn’t expected to stop. I missed the girls and wanted to give them something I bought in Tulsa.”

  “They’ve missed you, too.” He almost included himself, but he wasn’t going there.

  What did he miss? Her pancakes, coffee that didn’t taste bitter, or music blasting as she cleaned?

  “Do you mind if I go in and see them?”

  “No, go ahead. I have to load some calves that we’ve sold.” The reason he’d backed the trailer up to the corral. The bawling calves were huddled in the far corner of the corral.

  “I could help you.”

  “I can get it.” He tried not to move like someone who needed help. She laughed at his attempt.

  “Let me help. I’ll miss this.” The faraway look returned. “We’re moving into a neighborhood where our view is of the neighbor’s back door.”

  “I’ve lived in those neighborhoods. It works for a lot of people. I guess it’s a good thing we’re all different.”

  “Yeah. So I can help?”

  He pointed her to the gate. “I’ll head them this way. You make sure they don’t squeeze through there.”

  She nodded and headed for the spot he pointed to. She wasn’t country at all, just wanted to be. That was okay with him. He enjoyed watching her standing there in her denim shorts, a T-shirt and sandals. Not exactly a picture of a cowgirl, but he didn’t really know what a cowgirl was supposed to look like. He’d seen a few in his time that looked like anything but.

  The calves moved away from him. His dog circled, keeping them together and moving toward the trailer. One angus steer tried to break from the group, the dog brought him back, nipping quick at the steer’s hooves.

  Ahead of him, Rachel stood next to the gate, her hand shading her eyes as the sun hit. He didn’t smile, couldn’t. He was picturing her in that house surrounded by neighbors.

  The calves ran through the opening into the back of the trailer. He swung the trailer door, swinging the latch in place. The calves moved to the back of the trailer.

  Wyatt slid through the gate. Rachel moved out of his way.

  “You don’t have to go.”

  Her eyes widened and she stared, waiting. He didn’t know what to say other than what he’d said. He lifted a hand and rested it on the side of the trailer.

  “I kind of do have to go. I don’t have a home here. My parents are moving.”

  “Rachel, the girls don’t want any other nanny. They already miss you and you’re not gone.”

  “Of course, I know they’ll miss me. I’ll miss them, too. But I feel like I need to be close to my parents. If my mom gets sick, I need to be there.”

  “It isn’t that far. What is it, just under two hours to their new church?”

  “Something like that. But if she’s sick, she needs daily help, not a visit.”

  “Right, you’re right.” He let it go because he did understand her loyalty to her parents. He got it.

  “I’m going to go see the girls. I want them to know that I’ll visit.”

  He smiled and tipped his hat. “Yeah, visits are good. I have to get these steers on down the road.”

  She turned and walked away. He watched her walk through the back door of his house and then he climbed in the truck and cranked the engine. He eased forward, watching in the rearview mirror as the corral gate swung shut. The trailer shifted as the cattle shifted.

  In the house Rachel was telling his girls goodbye. Why did he have the sudden urge to hit something? It combined with a pretty nasty urge to turn the truck and stock trailer around.

  And do what? Beg Rachel to stay? What would he tell her? He could tell her that his girls were happier with her in their lives. He was happier.

  After that, what then? He would have her in their home as a housekeeper and nanny. She would cook for them, clean their house and hug the girls. He’d still have to deal with moving on.

  Last night he’d pulled out photo albums. He’d glanced through pictures of Wendy in college. They were young and in love. Crazy in love.

  He rode bulls and roped steers. She spent weekends working at a homeless shelter. They’d picked youth ministry together. After college they’d gotten married.

  The pictures stayed happy for a few years, until after Molly’s birth. That was when the story of their lives changed. He’d looked at those pictures and tried to figure out what he could have done.

  But he couldn’t change things. He couldn’t undo them now. What he had was a future with his two little girls and memories of their mother. Someday he’d share the good memories.

  None of that fixed the situation right now. Rachel was going to leave and Violet was hiring a new housekeeper. She’d talked about a lady named Thelda Matheson. He hoped she wore joint cream.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Rachel stood in the green-and-purple bedroom staring out a window without a view and knowing this was all wrong. She was in the wrong place, in the wrong life. It felt like wearing someone else’s shoes.

  Her parents were drinking coffee in the new kitchen, sitting in front of patio doors at a table they’d had for years. Same table, same parents, different kitchen. Same life. Their life.

  She joined them at that table. They looked up, not asking questions. She got up to pour herself a cup of coffee and then she joined them again.

  “You’re right, this isn’t my place anymore.”

  “What does that mean?” Her mom put her cup down and glanced at Rachel’s dad. The two seemed to always know everything she was about to tell them.

  When she had been sixteen and rebellious, nothing ever seemed to surprise them. They always seemed to know what trouble she’d gotten herself into.

  “I left my ministry.” Rachel wiped at tears that were rolling down her cheeks. “I left my home.”

  “Dawson?” Her dad smiled, as if he’d planned it himself.

  “Yes, Dawson. The teen girls. My Sunday school class. Molly and Kat. I left it all because I thought you needed me here. But God called you to make this move, not me. It’s just that I’m stubborn or afraid, I’m not sure which.”

  “And you thought I needed you.” Gloria patted her hand. “Honey, I will always need you, but I’m really okay.”

  “I know you are. Maybe I wasn’t. Maybe I’ve needed you.”

  “I think we just got into the bad habit of letting you take care of us.” Her mom smiled. “What do you plan on doing?”

  “I think I’m going to call Etta and see if I can still take her up on the offer to stay at her house. I’ll call the church and ask if I can keep working with the kids.”

  “It feels good, doesn’t it?” Her dad grinned big.

  “Yeah, it kind of does feel good. This is right, Dad.”

  “I think I tried to tell you that the other day. Time to fly, Rachel. Go find your future.”

  She carried her still-full cup to the sink. “I think I’m going to start packing.”

  The one thing she wouldn’t do was make this move about Wyatt. He’d hired a new housekeeper. The girls needed to get settled with the person he’d found. Rachel needed to make sure she was where God wanted her, not jump back into what felt comfortable and easy.

  She needed to wait becau
se she didn’t want a broken heart her first day back in her new life.

  Wyatt drove past the parsonage a few days after Rachel’s last visit. It was empty. He let out a sigh and kept on going. She was gone and Mrs. Matheson had taken her place. He didn’t like the lady. No reason, he just didn’t like her. He didn’t like her sensible shoes or the smell of eucalyptus that hovered over her as she moved through the house.

  Kat and Molly weren’t crazy about her either.

  He pulled up the drive and parked inside the garage. Violet was still at the house. She assured him she would be leaving in the morning. They’d be fine without her.

  Of course they would. He walked out of the garage and across the yard to the barn. The stallion he’d bought from the Fosters whinnied from the small corral at the side of the barn. Wyatt walked up to the fence and the big bay, his dark red coat gleaming, trotted up for a treat. Wyatt pulled an apple snack out of his pocket and the horse sucked it up, barely grazing his hands.

  The back door banged shut. He turned. It was Violet. She walked toward him, her high heels sinking in the yard that was still soggy from last night’s rain. He wondered if she would ever try to fit into these surroundings. He doubted it.

  “Did you see Rachel before she left?” Violet stood next to him, holding her hand out to the horse but withdrawing it before the horse made contact.

  “No, I didn’t see her. I think they left last night.”

  “Right.” Violet stepped back because the horse stuck his nose out to her.

  “What is it you want to say, Violet?”

  She smiled up at him. “Don’t let her go.”

  “What does that mean? I offered her the job, she turned it down. How can I change that?” He really wanted to walk away from this conversation. “I’ve hired someone. Remember?”

  “Don’t be ridiculous, I’m not talking about hiring her as a housekeeper. I’m talking about what you seem to be ignoring or avoiding. You love her. It’s obvious she loves you. Why in the world are you letting her go?”

  The mother of his wife, pushing him to—what?

  “Violet, this isn’t the conversation I want to have with you.”

  “No, I’m sure it isn’t. But I think I’m the best person to tell you that Wendy would want you to move on. She’d want it to be with someone like Rachel, someone who loves you and your girls. This kind of love doesn’t happen often. For most people it happens once. You’re blessed to have it happen twice. Don’t let this get away.”

  “It’s too soon.” He pushed his hat down on his head, tipping the brim to shade his eyes.

  “Who says?”

  “I say.” He backed away from the fence, from the horse, from Violet. “I say it’s too soon.”

  “You can’t control that. You’re trying to hold on to her memory and the love you shared. I get that. But you can’t say it’s too soon. Not if the right person has entered your life and you’re on the verge of losing her. If you haven’t already lost her.”

  “I have to go for a drive.”

  “Fine, go for a drive. But if I was you, I’d spend time praying about this. I don’t believe in chance, Wyatt Johnson. It was no accident that she was here, in your life and in the lives of your daughters.”

  “Violet, let it go.”

  She drew in her lips and shook her head. “Wyatt, you’re stubborn.”

  He walked away, back to his truck, back to a few minutes alone. As he drove down the drive, he thought back to her words. He remembered telling Rachel that he wasn’t ready.

  He hadn’t planned on ever being ready.

  And Rachel had made a choice. He’d asked her to stay and she’d made the decision to go.

  Because he hadn’t asked her to stay for him. He called himself every kind of fool because he knew he’d asked the wrong question.

  Fly, little bird, fly. Rachel smiled as the wind whipped through her hair. The radio blasted Sara Evans and she sang along to a song about suds being left in the bucket and clothes left hanging on the line.

  Rachel Waters was finally leaving home. After the conversation with her parents a few days ago, she’d taken time to figure out exactly what she wanted. She knew it wasn’t Tulsa. As much as she loved the city, she didn’t want to live there.

  And it had been pretty obvious her parents didn’t need her. It had been more obvious that maybe they were a little relieved to hear that she planned on moving out.

  She’d watched them together, watched her mom and dad taking care of each other, unpacking, planning. She’d watched herself on the outside of their circle, trying to be helpful, trying to take care of them. And all along they could take care of themselves.

  She’d stopped taking risks. A long time ago she’d decided safe was good. Well, today was a new day. Today included giving in a little, maybe even giving in to temptation.

  So on the way out of Tulsa she’d gone through a drive-through for a frozen coffee drink full of calories and a cookie laden down with chocolate chips. Take that, thighs.

  Rachel Waters was done controlling her life. She planned on finding her path, her future, her today. With God in control.

  Today. No more waiting for tomorrow. No more fear of taking risks.

  She had called Etta who’d been overjoyed with the idea of Rachel staying with her for a while, helping on the farm and with her business. Vera had answered the next call and agreed to give her a few lunch shifts during the week.

  Rachel cruised through Dawson, slow, taking it all in. Home. She smiled, loving that word. The one place she had loved more than any other and now it was her home. Her choice. She had a place to go and a nice savings account. It felt good. It felt better than good.

  It felt pretty close to perfect until she drove past Wyatt’s and saw the girls on the swing. It shouldn’t hurt, that he’d offered her a job. But it did. He wanted her in their lives, but only as the person who cooked meals, gave hugs and went home at the end of every day.

  She wanted more than that.

  The old convictions were still strong, the belief that God would bring the right person into her life. As she got older she wondered if maybe that wasn’t His plan. Not everyone had the same destiny. There was a point in time when a person just accepted what his or her life was and made peace with it.

  Etta’s house was a welcome sight. The big, yellow Victorian glowed in the setting sun. Rachel pulled up the drive and parked. When she walked around the corner of the house, Etta met her on the sidewalk.

  “Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.” Etta grabbed her in a tight hug.

  “It’s only been a few days.”

  “Longest days of my life, wondering if you’d get it right.”

  Rachel laughed and hugged Etta back. “I got it right.”

  Etta slid an arm around Rachel’s waist and they walked up the steps to the porch. “At least partially right.”

  “How much more right do I need to be?”

  Etta turned at the sound of a car coming down the road. No, it was a truck. Rachel’s heart froze in place, refusing to pick up where it left off. She took a deep breath and her heart did the same.

  “Hmm, someone else must be trying to get it right.”

  “No, Etta.” Rachel refused to watch the truck drive on by.

  “Oh, you kids. I tell you what, in the last year, I’ve had it up to my neck with silly young couples who take forever to get it right. It was simpler in my day. The man knew what he wanted and he went after it. The woman knew it was the right thing to do and she stopped running. Happy ever after.”

  Rachel wanted to laugh but she couldn’t. The truck didn’t go on down the road, it pulled into Etta’s drive.

  Etta chuckled a little. “Don’t run, Rachel. I’m going inside and you let yourself get caught.”

  “I have a job. I’m going to work for you. He found someone else to watch the girls.”

  Etta had walked inside. The screen door closed behind her.

  “Oh, honey, you are clueless.
”

  Rachel stood on the porch waiting for Wyatt to get out of the truck and join her. He walked a little easier than he had the previous week. It hadn’t been that long, she reminded herself. But honestly, the last week had felt like a lifetime.

  “So this is where you went to.” He walked up the steps. He took off his hat and held it in front of him, raising one hand and running it through dark hair flattened to his head.

  She’d been right about him, he was heartache and she didn’t need heartache, not even if it came in a package with lean, suntanned cheeks and a smile that nearly became a caress.

  “I came back.” She eased the words out.

  “I know. I’ve been in Tulsa.”

  “What? Why?”

  “To talk to your dad.”

  “Oh.”

  “And to see you.” He stepped closer. His dark eyes held hers captive.

  “Really?” Her heart took a hopeful leap forward but she pulled it back, reined it in. Maybe the new housekeeper hadn’t worked out.

  “Yeah, really.” His smile was sweet, it melted in his eyes and melted her heart. Wasn’t that the same heart she was trying to keep under control?

  For some reason it wasn’t working, that control thing.

  “How are the girls?”

  He reached for her hands. “The girls miss you.”

  “I miss them, too.”

  He tossed his hat on a nearby chair. “I miss you, too.”

  “I see.”

  “No, you don’t. Rachel, I got up this morning and walked around a house that has never felt more empty. I realized what was missing. You.” He teased her with another one of those smiles. “I realized I asked you the wrong question.”

  She didn’t know what to say.

  “You are the thing missing from our lives. From my life. I went to Tulsa because I wanted to see you. I wanted to tell you that I don’t want you in our lives as a housekeeper or a nanny.”

  Her heart wouldn’t let go of hope. It wouldn’t stop its crazy beat inside her chest. She couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe.