For You I Will

by Donna Hill

  “You know Crystal. She could do anything at any moment as long as it served her purposes.” Anthony looked up at the sky, watching the sun slowly begin to set beyond the umbrella of trees. He slowly paced across the back deck of the house. He could hear the laughter of Jessie and Crystal float to him from inside the house. “Anyway, man, she plans to stay a few days.”

  “This gets worse by the minute.”

  “I was supposed to have Kai over for dinner tonight but had to cancel. She all but hung up on me. I wanted to explain, but she didn’t give me a chance.”

  “It really does get worse. Hey, you have to talk to Kai at some point and let her know what the deal is.”

  “I know. And I have to find someplace for Crystal to stay. She can stay here tonight because it would break Jessie’s heart if she didn’t. But tomorrow she’s out of here. Any room at the inn?” he asked half jokingly.

  “We are booked solid. I can call around for you and see what’s available in town.”

  “Cool. I’d appreciate that. Consider it a 911 emergency.”

  “I got you. As soon as I hear something I’ll give you a holler.”

  “Thanks, man.”

  “No problem. Try to keep your cool over there.”

  “It ain’t easy.”

  Lincoln chuckled lightly. “Later, man.”

  “Later.”

  Steeling himself, Anthony opened the back door and returned inside.

  Crystal and Kai were snuggled together on the couch watching cartoons. Anyone walking in on this heartwarming picture of maternal bonding would think that Crystal was the perfect mother. He knew that Crystal truly loved Jessie, but she loved herself more. That was the problem—nothing or no one ever came before Crystal’s needs or wants. It was the downfall of their marriage. He understood that much of Crystal’s issues of self-worth were a result of the life she’d lived before they’d met. But he couldn’t fix the past and he couldn’t mend her.

  “Jessie was telling me some wonderful things about this Dr. Kai. I’m looking forward to meeting her tonight and thanking her for taking such good care of Jessie.”

  “Unfortunately, she had to cancel.” He crossed through the open-layout living room into the kitchen.

  “Oh, really? That’s too bad. Maybe another time, then.”

  “Yeah, maybe,” he murmured as he took the steaks that he’d preseasoned out of the refrigerator.

  Crystal hopped up from the couch and came into the kitchen. “Let me help. Where do you keep your pans?”

  Anthony gave her a sidelong look. “Cabinet on the bottom, under the counter.”

  “What do you want to fix with the steaks—baked potatoes?”

  “Sure.”

  Crystal began moving around and working in the kitchen as if she’d taken lessons from Martha Stewart. Within minutes she’d put the steaks in the oven, washed the potatoes and wrapped them in foil and was stir-frying vegetables in the wok.

  Anthony felt as if he was in some kind of bizarre Twilight Zone episode. He was waiting for the real Crystal to turn up at his doorstep and want to know what was going on.

  Dinner was one for the record books. Crystal talked and laughed and kept them engaged with her stories of the patrons that came to the Museum of Natural History where she worked part-time. Several times Anthony had to blink away the veil that had descended over his eyes and had him seeing them as a family—the three of them. His gut knew that this was nothing but show for Crystal. It would take more than a shortened vacation to turn her from the self-absorbed woman that she was into the one she was posing to be.

  After dinner, Anthony cleaned up the kitchen while Crystal gave Jessie her bath and got her ready for bed. All he could think about was explaining all of this craziness to Kai and hoping that she would understand. He wasn’t even sure why it mattered to him so much. He would be leaving in a week. He lived in Manhattan. He was a shoo-in for district attorney and his trips to Sag Harbor would be brief and intermittent. That was not the foundation for a relationship and he really couldn’t expect Kai to settle for something like that. It would be selfish of him to even consider it.

  “Hey, Jessie’s fast asleep,” Crystal said, walking up behind him. “Need some help?”

  “No. I’m fine, thanks.”

  “You barely ate. Are you feeling okay?”

  “Fine.”

  “Got anything stronger than iced tea around here?” She leaned her hip against the counter.

  “There’s wine over in the wine cooler.” He turned on the dishwasher.

  She opened the door to the mini fridge and took out a bottle of pinot grigio and held it up for his approval.

  He shrugged. She went to the overhead cabinets and took out two wine goblets and poured for them then took the glasses into the living room and set them on the coffee table. With a bit of trepidation, Anthony joined her but made a point of taking a seat opposite her in the armchair.

  Crystal reached for her glass and Anthony did as well.

  “To the good times,” Crystal said before taking a sip.

  Anthony didn’t respond. He took a swallow of his wine and put the glass down. “You can sleep in my room. I’ll take the couch. There’s no way you and Jessie can sleep in that twin bed.”

  “I couldn’t do that to you. If it gets too uncomfortable I can take the couch.”

  “What’s this really all about, Crystal?”

  She looked at him with wide-eyed innocence. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean this,” he said and waved his hand around. “This show, this concern, this tone, this being decent.”

  She leaned forward. “It’s not a show. Why can’t you believe that? I’ve had time to really think, Tony. I’ve changed. I’m changing...for you...for us. If you would only give it a try.”

  He stared at her for a moment then looked away. “There are extra towels in the linen closet next to the bathroom.” He stood, took his glass of wine and walked out back.

  * * *

  Kai had just returned from a run with Jasper. The cool evening air had done her good and the run had her blood warm and circulating again. She was actually feeling better than she had earlier, and was thankful that she went when she did. The sky had clouded over and the scent of rain hung in the air.

  She quickly washed her hands and took a bottle of water from the fridge, downing half of it in four long gulps. She filled Jasper’s water bowl with the remainder, then headed off to take a long, hot shower.

  Wrapped in her terry robe and feeling totally refreshed after her shower, she decided to order dinner from the Italian restaurant that she and Tiffany liked so much and see what movie she could find on cable.

  The restaurant promised delivery within an hour and she was thrilled to find The Best Man and The Best Man Holiday coming on back to back. She grabbed her throw from the back of the couch, covered up and settled in.

  The Best Man movie was up to the part when Taye Diggs comes to the studio and sees Nia Long for the first time in a while when Kai heard the delivery car pull up. She stuck her feet in her slippers, took her wallet from her purse and went to the door just as the bell rang.

  She pulled the door open. The rain had already begun. “Wow, that was really quick.” She took the bag from the deliveryman, who ducked under the overhang of her doorway while she signed the credit card receipt. She took a ten-dollar bill from her wallet and handed it over. “Thanks for coming out in this weather.”

  “No problem. Thank you. Good night.” He pulled the hood of his jacket up over his head and dashed back to his car.

  “Night.” She pushed the door closed and took the bag into the kitchen. She got a plate and spooned half of the veal cutlet parmesan onto the plate, sealed the container with the rest of it and added a good helping of the Caesar salad before
returning to the movie.

  Before she could take her first bite, the doorbell rang again. She looked on the table and realized that she had the restaurant’s copy of the credit card receipt. She grabbed it up and went to the door.

  She pulled the door open. “Sorry...”

  “I know I should have called first, but I didn’t think you would pick up.” Anthony wiped the rain out of his face.

  Her stomach twirled. She leaned her weight on her left leg and casually stared at him. “Why would you think that?” She folded her arms and watched the rain wash over him.

  He hunched his shoulders to keep the rain from running down his back. Kai enjoyed watching his discomfort.

  “Because of the last-minute cancellation. I wanted to explain, but you didn’t give me a chance.”

  The sound of distant thunder rumbled in the distance.

  Kai pushed out a breath. “What is there to explain? Something apparently came up.”

  “More of a someone rather than a something. My ex-wife Crystal showed up—unannounced and uninvited,” he quickly added.

  So that was who she saw. “Really.”

  “Yes.”

  A streak of lightning flashed, casting him in silhouette against the night. A perfect frame for a photo.

  She cleared her throat. “I ordered dinner. It’s getting cold.”

  He lowered his gaze and nodded. “I’ll let you get back to it.”

  “There’s plenty...if you want to come in.”

  He glanced up at the pouring rain, then smiled down at her. “Sure.”

  Chapter 17

  Anthony hung up his wet jacket and took off his shoes. Kai got him a towel to dry off, then went to fix his plate. She reheated both hers and his and they settled down in the living room. The movie was almost over.

  For a time they ate in silence, both working hard at pretending to watch the movie. When the credits rolled they both spoke at once.

  “You first,” Anthony conceded.

  “I’m glad you told me about...your ex.”

  He angled his body toward her. “I don’t have anything to hide.”

  “I was there yesterday.”

  “There?”

  “I was at your house yesterday. I wanted to surprise you with a housewarming gift.”

  “I...don’t understand.”

  She explained to him what she’d come to his house to do and then what she saw.

  Anthony squeezed his eyes and slowly shook his head, imagining what must have run through Kai’s head. He reached out to her. “I am so sorry.” He took her hand and brought it to his lips. “Trust me, it’s nothing like that at all.”

  “Maybe you need to tell me what it is like.”

  He heaved a deep sigh and pressed back against the cushion of the couch. “I met Crystal about ten years ago...”

  Anthony didn’t leave anything out when he told Kai about his marriage, what it was and what it had become. He talked about how they’d grown apart and why. He even told her that there had been times when he doubted the paternity of his daughter. “Even if I wasn’t Jessie’s natural father, I wouldn’t care. I love that little girl from the pit of my soul.”

  “I know you do,” she said gently. “I can tell just by the way you look at her.”

  “I tried to make it work. I know that a lot of Crystal’s self-centeredness all stems from how she was raised—or wasn’t.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Crystal has no idea who or where her natural mother or her father is. She was given up at birth. Teen parents, she was told. She was adopted by a young, wealthy white couple when she was six months old. They gave her everything—the best food, clothes, toys, schools, trips, and then the couple had a child of their own when Crystal was nine. Nothing was ever the same after that. Her adopted parents doted on their new daughter, and Crystal... Anyway she started acting out, got kicked out of school, got involved in stealing and then her parents did the unthinkable. When Crystal was fourteen, they put her in foster care.”

  “Oh, my goodness. How awful.”

  “Yeah,” he said, looking off into the distance. “It is.” He exhaled slowly. “I guess there was a part of me that thought I could fix her, right the wrongs of the past. I did everything I could. But the betrayals and the lying were more than I was willing to deal with. I had to realize that Crystal was not a case that I could solve. I had to let her go.”

  Kai studied her entwined fingers on her lap. “Do you still love her?”

  Anthony was thoughtful for a moment. “I thought I did even after we broke up and the divorce was finalized. But it wasn’t love and, God help me, it may have never been love—at least not the kind to build a life together on. I was on a rescue mission of the beautiful damsel in distress. It fed my ego—her need. But I slowly and eventually realized that’s not my role. And it wasn’t fair to me, to her and certainly not to Jessie. What I need is a partner, an equal. That’s never what I had with Crystal.”

  Kai’s gaze moved slowly over his face, taking in the look of regret, sincerity and hope that played in his eyes. She believed him. She did. But where did that leave the two of them?

  “Thank you for telling me that.”

  “I want to be honest with you. I started to tell you the other night—when we were together.” His brows drew together. “Listen, I have no idea how or if this can work between us. All I do know is that I want to give it a shot. It won’t be easy. I want to try. I want to see you, spend time with you and let you get to know me. Then...we can see where it goes.”

  Kai ran her tongue across her bottom lip, then gently tugged it between her teeth.

  “If you want to...” He reached out and covered her hands with his. “I want you to want to.” He grinned.

  Her eyes crinkled at the corners as a smile lifted her lips. “I think...I want to.”

  Anthony moved toward her. His fingers threaded through her hair and eased her toward him.

  When his lips touched hers and that spark hit her in the center of her being, it was better than the first time. She gave in to the kiss, let him possess her mouth, taste her, tease her, and she gave him the same and more in return.

  The rain pounded against the windows while the thunder rolled through the clouds. There was a loud boom followed by an incredible flash of light and then everything went dark.

  They laughed against each other’s mouths.

  “The backup should kick on in a minute,” Kai said as she placed tiny kisses along his jaw.

  “How much can we get done in the dark?” he asked, his voice growing thick. He teased her earlobe.

  She cupped his face in her hands. “I know my way around a hard body in the dark. I can do plenty.”

  He leaned her back on the couch. “Is that right?” He kissed her neck and felt her tremble. “And I have a little experience with hugging the curves.” He peeled open her robe.

  Kai hissed in air through her teeth. His mouth was hot on her bare flesh. He loosened the belt on her robe and pulled it fully open.

  “God, you’re beautiful,” he murmured before lowering his head to feast on the delicacy of her exposed breasts. “I want to do everything to you at once,” he ground out and took the hard bud of her nipple between his teeth.

  Kai moaned and arched her back. She locked her fingers behind his head and drew him closer. The pleasure that he was putting on her body should be illegal. She wound her way beneath him until she could feel the hard thickness of him pressing between her thighs. He groaned when she rotated her pelvis and draped one of her legs across the back of his thighs.

  “It’s like that, huh?” He nibbled her bottom lip, licked the top one and hooked his arm beneath her knee and drew her leg up along the length of his back.

  “Hmm,” she hu
mmed deep in her throat.

  Anthony stroked the satin of her hip. He wanted to holler from the delight that touching her brought him. Kai was so much of what he longed for, that person to fill the hole in his soul, the woman that would make him want to come home at night. He was getting way ahead of himself. He couldn’t help it. There was something about Kai Randall that made him want to think beyond tomorrow. But her eager body brought him right back to the here and now.

  Like two horny teenagers, they made hard, crazy love right there on that couch with the rain slashing and the thunder and lightning beating up the heavens. Their sighs and moans and shouts of pleasure blended in with the cacophony of the night. And when Kai felt the telltale ripple that began at the bottom of her feet, shimmied up the back of her thighs, around to the pit of her stomach and flashed through her limbs, she thrust her hips up at Anthony and then did that thing that made him crazy with her inner walls and it was all over but the shouting.

  Eventually they picked themselves up, filled two glasses of wine and wandered into Kai’s bedroom.

  Kai propped herself up on her elbow while her eyes moved slowly across Anthony’s face, which seemed to glow with an inner light. “I’m glad you came and that we talked...”

  “So am I.” He ran a finger along her cheek. “I’m not sure how often I’m going to be able to get down here...”

  She put a finger across his lips to silence him. “We’ll figure something out.”

  “Would you ever consider coming back to New York?”

  “Oh, no.” She slowly shook her head. “I put that life behind me for good. I don’t mind visiting, but I know I could never live there again.” She saw the flicker of disappointment in his eyes and lowered her gaze.

  He breathed heavily. “I can respect that.” He kissed her lightly. “We’ll figure it out.”

  Kai flopped back on the pillow and stared up at the ceiling. “Maybe you should call your house and make sure everything is all right.”

  He’d been so absorbed with Kai and reconnecting that he’d put thoughts of Crystal in the back of his head. “Trust me, if things weren’t all right, she would have been calling my cell phone until it disintegrated. Jessie was fast asleep when I left.” Yet for a brief instant a pang of guilt jabbed him in the gut. What if something had gone wrong? No. He had a generator at the house. They had power. It was only a storm. They were fine.