When I'm Gone

by Katilyn S

  “Good job Michael,” somebody called out.

  “It’s about time,” another one teased.

  I saw Andrew snickering in the corner and I snatched him by the wrist. I pulled him over to me and stared hard at him.

  “What is this?” I asked. He chuckled for another minute before speaking.

  “I might have told a few people that you found your soulmate,” he managed between snickers. I gasped.

  “You did what?” I yelled. Andrew started laughin again and patted me on the shoulder. “Why?”

  “It’s all fun and games,” he said. I continued to glare at him until he stopped laughing. He stared at me with a peculiar expression. “What’s wrong?”

  “I have a feeling something is going to happen today,” I explained. I told him about the dream I had had that morning. He listened silently, nodding at some places. When I finally finished, he just smiled.

  “I am pretty sure that you are just freaking out,” he told me. I shook my head.

  “No. I am not,” I fumed. “I have never had a dream like that before.”

  Andrew watched me carefully.

  “Never,” I added for emphasis. He chuckled and slapped me on the back.

  “Yes, you are,” he stated and walked out of the room. Grumbling under my breath, I followed him into the kitchen. There, I was greeted by more applause and a few whistles. Seth sauntered up to me and stuck out his hand.

  “Congats man. I’m so happy for you,” he exclaimed. I returned the gesture and we shook hands.

  “Thanks, bro,” I replied.

  “You think she’s the one?” he asked, trying to make small talk. I grinned a tight smile and shrugged my shoulders.

  “I don’t know, Seth,” I admitted. “I think so, but I know Claire. And it will take her a while to realize it too. So, we will have to wait and see.”

  “Well, at least she loves you,” he commented. I nodded and smiled for real.

  “Yeah,” I agreed. “That makes things a whole lot easier.”

  I grabbed a plate from the kitchen and made myself an omelet. I sat down to eat and thought about the day ahead. The guys were bustling around, but I tuned them out.

  Is there really going to be ‘the big one’ today? I asked myself. Andrew thinks I’m crazy, but I know I’m not. I just know it.

  I was interrupted in my thoughts when Andrew sat down beside me, his plate filled with eggs, toast and bacon. I smiled at him and took my last bite.

  “What happened last night?” I asked. He frowned, sighing towards his plate.

  “We had a lot of false alarms. Kids were messing with us. We went back to the same spot three times, before calling the police to stop the calls,” he moaned. “There was a fire in a grocery store a little after midnight. No lasting damage, if you don’t count the whole fruits and vegetable section is demolished.”

  “You finished the report?” I wondered aloud.

  “Not yet,” he said. “I have a few more things to write down.”

  For every call, we had to write a report. We went through them all later, checking things over, handing them to the chief.

  “Chief Parsons here yet?” I asked Andrew. He shook his head and shrugged.

  “Not yet. He called and said he would be a little late,” Andrew stated. I nodded thoughtfully and took my dishes to the sink. I rinsed them off and stuck them on the drying rack. As a fire fighter, you never had time to fully wash the dishes. You never knew when you were going to eat.

  “Hey guys,” a guy called out from the front door.

  “Speak of the devil and he may appear,” Andrew uttered under his breath. I smothered my laughter and rolled my eyes at him.

  Chief Trey Parsons walked into the kitchen and smiled at all of us. He was a large man in his late forties. He had thinning hair on the top of his head and today, he was sporting a five o’clock shadow. He was wearing a pair of khakis and a dark green polo.

  I caught his attention and he waved at me. I waved back and smiled. He neared and I heard Andrew cough behind me.

  “Suck up,” he coughed again and I kicked him under the table. I grunted and a smiled at my victory.

  “How you doing, Herring?” Chief Parsons asked, shaking my hand. I nodded.

  “Just fine, sir,” I answered. “And you?”

  “Great. Just great. You ready to fight some fires?” he teased. I laughed weakly at his cheesy joke.

  “You know it,” I said. He slapped me on the back and went over to Andrew. He nodded strictly at him.

  “King,” he muttered.

  “Chief Parsons,” Andrew replied. He shook his hand numbly and the chief walked away. I snickered into my hand and Andrew turned his clare on me.

  “Tell me again why he hates you,” I inquired. Andrew said nothing, but continued to glare at me as he cleans up his plate. “Come on. Tell me.”

  “You know why,” he stated. I laughed and stood up with him.

  “Tell me again,” I pleaded. “Please?”

  “I stole his ‘girlfriend’ in twelvth grade,” Andrew mumbled.

  “And who is that girlfriend now?” I sang.

  “My wife,” he shot back. I laughed and slapped him on the back.

  “See? Now, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” I asked.

  “Don’t push your luck, Herring,” he warned and walked out of the room. Still laughing, I followed him to the weight room.

  Chapter 22-September 11, 2001; 6:30 a.m. (Claire)

  “I love Michael,” I sang as I moved about my room. I threw on my leather jacket and sat down on my bed. I pulled my legs up to my chest and tied the laces of my Chucks. I ran a hand through my unruly hair and shrugged. It would have to stay that way for the day.

  I walked out of my room and knocked on Alex’s door. There was a crash and a muffled yelp right after wards.

  “Alex?” I called. “You okay?”

  “Yeah,” came the muffled response. The door swung open and Alex was on his knees rubbing the back of his head.

  “What happened?” I wondered, trying not to laugh.

  “I slipped in my bathroom, after you knocked and hit my head on the floor. It hurt too,” he grumbled. “Thanks a lot, sis.”

  “Sorry, bro,” I apologized and ruffled his hair. He scowled and started to shut the door.

  “Can I finish getting ready?” he asked, a hint of annoyance in his voice.

  “Go ahead,” I told him. He grinned and closed the door. I turned around and noticed a piece of paper by the front door. I skipped over to the door and picked up the paper. I flipped it over in my hand smiling at the sight of my name on the front. I opened it and my smile grew.

  Hey Claire.

  Dinner tonight? See you at seven.

  Love, Michael

  Laughing, I refolded the note and stuck it in my back pocket. I walked into the kitchen where I grabbed an apple from the counter. I bit into thinking about Michael’s note.

  I wonder where he is taking me? I thought, smiling wryly to myself. Or is he going to cook dinner this time? He said that he is a really good cook. Hm.

  I finished my apple and tossed it in the trash. I shuffled around the kitchen for a minute until I realized that I had nothing left to do. I picked up my cell phone from the table and dialed a number I knew by heart.

  “Hello?” A woman picked up the phone, her tone business-like.

  “Mom,” I replied warmly.

  “Hey, Claire,” she exclaimed. “I haven’t heard from you in a while. How is teaching? Didn’t you guys start yesterday?”

  “Yeah,” I answered. “And I love teaching. My students are so sweet and not at all snobby like I thought they would be.”

  “That’s good, honey. How’s Alex?” Her tone was cautious, hoping to not cross a boundary line.

  “He’s good,” I chattered happily. “He has a girlfriend now and they are both in my first period class. I really like her mom. I think you would too.”

  Her voice instantly warmed and she laughe
d. “I’m sure I would.”

  “How are you mom? How is your job going?” I aasked curiously.

  “Great,” she cooed. “I am actually in D.C. right now on a business trip. It is so pretty here. I have already visited the White House.”

  “That’s cool,” I replied. “Did you see the president there?”

  “No,” she laughed at my teasing. “He is down in Florida right now at an elementary school.”

  “Okay,” I said.

  “Did you need something, honey?” she asked, concern masking her voice. I chuckled and shook my head even though she couldn’t see me.

  “No thanks mom,” I said. “I just wanted to hear your voice.”

  “Well, thanks, Claire,” she cooed again. “How are you? I mean, you as a person.”

  “I am really good. There is something you should know though,” I paused.

  “What is it?” Anxiety colored her voice.

  “I kind of, maybe, sort of have a boyfriend. And I sort of love him,” I explained. On the other end on the phone, my mom laughed; loud and mockingly.

  “Claire, how can you sort of have a boyfriend and how can you sort of love him?” she managed. I surpressed a groan and smiled into the phone.

  “I mean, I do love him. And yes, he is my boyfriend. We have been dating for a few days now,” I said.

  “A few days?” she exclaimed. I cringed at her shrill voice. I hoped she wasn’t in a public place.

  “Well it is actually a little more complicated than you think,” I told her.

  “Okay,” she sighed.

  “Trust me?” I asked. She laughed again and I grinned.

  “Always,” she replied.

  “Good,” I said. Suddenly, Alex’s door opened and he walked out, glancing at me. He scrunched up his nose and shot a questioning look at me. I waved it off.

  “Well, honey, I have to get going. I am going to the Pentagon today,” she blurted.

  “Okay. Well, I have to go too. School starts in about an hour,” I answered. “I’ll call you later, okay, mom?”

  “Okay honey. I love you!” she shouted.

  “Love you too,” I whispered as the line went dead. I slipped the phone into my back pocket and turned to Alex.

  “Mom?” he guessed. I nodded and he shrugged. “I couldn’t talk to her?”

  “She had to go. She had business at the Pentagon in a little while,” I explained. Alex dropped his gaze and shrugged again.

  “Oh, okay,” he mumbled and walked off. I followed him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

  “She does love you, Alex,” I whispered. He shrugged out of my touch, but didn’t face me.

  “Oh, I’m sure,” he shot back, sarcastically. I trapped him in a hug and he struggled to get free.

  “She does,” I replied. “She asked about you.”

  “She did?” He turned to me, his eyes lighting up. I nodded, smiling at him.

  “Yep. I told her about Hope and how you were. She seemed relieved to hear that you were okay.”

  After saying that, Alex smiled slightly and tugged on my arm.

  “Come on, sis-” he stopped. “I mean, Ms. Barnes. We have to get to school.”

  “I’m coming. I’m coming,” I muttered and followed after him. I grabbed my purse adn walked out of the apartment, a nagging feeling tugging at the back of my mind.

  ----------------------------------------------

  “Go see your girlfriend,” I told Alex as we walked through the courtyard. He glanced at me and smiled slightly.

  “What are you talking about?” he asked, laughing nervously. I shoved him, causing him to stumble to the side.

  “You made me come out here twenty minutes earlier than I need to be here and you say that you aren’t going to see Hope?”

  “Um...,” he hesitated trying to think of an answer. I laughed.

  “That’s what I thought,” I teased. “Now, go.”

  “Thanks Claire,” he called over his shoulder as he ran off. I could see Hope on the other side of the courtyard, waiting for him. He ran up and hugged her, visibly laughing. They bent towards each other, kissing quickly. Alex grabbed her hand and they walked off into the building.

  Smiling to myself, I kept walking towards my classroom. I stopped by Lauren’s room, admiring the sign I had painted. I had given it to her yesterday afternoon and her reaction was not surprising at all.

  I walked up to Lauren’s room, hesitating before knocking on the door.

  “Come in,” Lauren shouted and I opened the door. She was on top of mini stage, fixing the curtains hanging on the sides. I cleared my throat, startling her. She turned towards me and a smile lit up her face.

  “Hey,” I called out and waved the canvas in the air. Her smile could probably be seen from the courtyard.

  “You finished it,” she exclaimed and jumped off the stage. Her hair was pulled into an unruly ponytail and she was wearing a pair of black pants with a cute red ruffled top. Her red flats echoed across the floor and bounced off the high walls.

  “Just a few minutes ago,” I confessed and held it out to her. She took it a turned it around. She gasped, before clutching it to her chest. Tears welled up in her eyes and she smiled softly.

  “This is the best thing anyone has ever made for me,” she murmured. “Thank you.”

  She walked over and hung it up on her door, facing us. The dark red director’s chair stood out against the white background along with the black masks. Her name was written in loopy cursive in the top righthand corner. Right underneath her name were the words “Theater Class”.

  “It was no big deal,” I said. She shook her head and rolled her eyes at me. “Really-

  “Yes it was. Thank you, again,” she interjected. She wrapped her arms around me and enveloped me in a hug. I cautiously hugged her back and felt a tear slip down my cheek.

  “Hey Claire,” Lauren shouted and knocked me out of my day dream. I peeked through the door. She was on her stage again, this time setting up a cluster of chairs. I waved at her and smiled.

  “Hey Lauren,” I called back. “Ready for the second day?”

  “Bring them on!” She rolled her eyes and stuck out her tongue. “I can take them.”

  “I’m sure you can,” I shot back. I waved bye to her and walked away.

  Once I got to my room, I stowed my purse in my desk and started to pull out the artwork from my first class from yesterday. I set them on the desk admiring them once again. Then, I pulled out my own canvas and set it on my easel. I gathered my black and red charcoal, setting them beside my canvas along with my other necessary tools.

  Before I started, I pulled out my cell phone, pressing a number on speed dial. I waited until I heard the beep and left a quick message ending with an “I love you”.

  I decided to start working on a drawing of the Twin Towers for my mom. I started out by sketching two large rectangles on the canvas. A few minutes later, I was lost in my own little world of art.

  Chapter 23-September 11, 2001; 8:40 a.m. (Michael)

  “Fifteen more, Herring. Fifteen more,” Andrew yelled into my ear. I grunted, pushing the dumbbell above my face. Beads of sweat formed on my forehead, running down my face.

  “He can’t do it,” Seth called out. I stole a quick look at him. He stood a few feet away with his arms crossed over his chest. He had a smirk on his face, and his eyes showed victory. I let it down and pushed it up again.

  “He might,” Andrew said thoughtfully. I did another rep, my face turning red from exertion.

  “He will never beat my record,” Seth replied with more force. For another three reps, everyone was silent, watching me push the 225 pound dumbbell up and down.

  “127 is a hard record to beat,” someone shouted from the back. There were murmurs of agreement as I pushed it up again. For a few more reps it was silent; only the sound of my harsh breathing was audible.

  Suddenly, a large plane flew overhead. It surprised me because there were warnings about flying
next to the Twin Towers. You had to be a certain height and distance away from them. Every guy in the station paused and looked up at the ceiling.

  “That’s way too low,” Andrew murumured. A loud, but muffled explosion cut the silence around us and I set the dumbbell down.

  “Yes! I won! I beat Michael Herring!” Seth exclaimed. Andrew hit him on the back of the head while following me.

  “Shut up, rookie,” he said over his shoulder and continued to follow behind me. I pushed out of the station door and and froze when I got outside. Everybody crowded around me and looked up into the sky.

  “Oh, God no. It-it can’t be. There is no way,” I whispered in agony.

  The top half of one of the Twin Towers had a gaping hole in it. Smoke billowed out from it along with brilliant orange, red and yellow flames. People on the sidewalk were frozen, all of them pointing up at the sky.

  All of New York City seemed to be holding its breath. It was like the disaster was too hard to believe that it was real. Cars swerved off the road, people getting out and holding each other. Pedestrians watched as more smoke flew through the air. Across the street, I watched silently as two ladies hugged each other and cried.

  In an instant everybody sprung back to life and the sound was defeaning. People were screaming and crying, running away from the buildings. The group of fire fighters around me were stunned into silence as people manuvered around us.

  “A plane......a-a plane flew into the North Tower,” a man screamed beside us. He looked over at us and then ran away. He didn’t even notice that all of his papers were flying out of his laptop bag.

  What are we going to do? I wondered. That fire is too big.

  I could faintly hear smaller muffled explosions as the upper floors caught on fire. The smoke was polluting the air by now; the sky was turning pitch black. I could feel the panic start to set in.

  I didn’t know how we were supposed to put out a fire that massive. That high off the ground. Even with all of the fire departments in New York City, we still weren’t going to be able to put it out.

  Another thought hit me. The plane was probably a passenger plane. that meands that innocent people died. They had no idea what was going to happen to them that morning. I swallowed loudly and looked around.