Finding Faith (Love's Compass Book 4)

by Melanie D. Snitker

  They obeyed, but laughter followed Grams to the door. Serenity craned her neck to see her admit their guest into the house. Peter offered Grams his arm and she took it, something Serenity found especially sweet.

  Grams motioned around the room. “Everyone, this is Peter Quintin.”

  Peter nodded at each person as she introduced them. His hair was white and closely cropped. His blue eyes were friendly and open. He stood straight and offered them a smile. “It’s good to meet you all. Rose has told me a lot about you. I appreciate your welcoming an old stranger in to celebrate this beautiful woman’s birthday. I hear these family meals are a bit famous around here.”

  Serenity enjoyed watching Grams as she patted his arm.

  Laurie elbowed Serenity. “I have to admit, they’re a cute couple,” she said, barely above a whisper.

  “I know!” Serenity smiled. “Grams seems happy.”

  “She really does.”

  Both women observed as Grams retrieved some cold water for Peter and set it just right on the coffee table. They didn’t miss how he gave her a wink and reached for her hand when she moved to sit next to him.

  Serenity sighed. When she spotted Lexi throwing a concerned look her way, she straightened her spine and made sure the smile she was wearing earlier was back in place.

  Apparently it wasn’t quick enough. A few moments later, Lexi cupped her elbow and pulled her to stand, directing her outside to the back porch.

  They barely made it through the door before Lexi began. “Spill it, Serenity. You’ve been telling everyone you’re fine since you got here, but we know you way too well.” She stood with her hands on her hips. “Mom’s starting to worry.”

  Serenity bit back a groan. She hadn’t told any of her family members about her short-lived relationship with Aaron and at this point hoped to avoid it completely. Obviously her original plans weren’t going to hold up.

  She motioned for Lexi to take a seat and then claimed one of the deck chairs for herself.

  Lexi pinned Serenity with her best big sister stare. “What’s going on?”

  Serenity took a deep breath to organize her thoughts and began to relate how she met Aaron and everything that had happened since then.

  Aside from the occasional “Wow” or “Oh, no!” Lexi stayed silent until Serenity finished her story.

  “I had no idea you moved and took up a role in a soap opera.”

  Serenity let the back of her head bounce off the chair backing behind her. “Seriously? And you wonder why I didn’t say anything to you guys. I should have refused to spill my guts to you.”

  “We love you. You know that, right?”

  “Yeah, I do.” Serenity closed her eyes. “I’m starting to wonder if I should’ve stayed in Kitner.”

  “Serenity?”

  “What?”

  “Suck it up, Buttercup.”

  Serenity chuckled. “You channeling Grams now?”

  Lexi laughed. “Maybe. Is it working?”

  It was no secret among her family members that Serenity tended to internalize everything until she was ready to explode. “A little.” She paused. “A man was finally interested in me for who I am and it falls apart.” The story of her life, it seemed. “Remind me of this moment the next time I’m coaxed into opening up my heart. It’s not worth it.”

  “One of these times it will be.”

  Serenity wanted to believe that.

  Lexi stared at her hard, making Serenity uncomfortable. “What?”

  “Are you in love with him?”

  Serenity blinked at her as she tried to digest her sister’s words. “Impossible.” She crossed her arms.

  Lexi raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

  Was she serious? “Maybe because I’ve known him for all of six weeks. Or maybe because, with everything else stacked against us, it’s obviously not meant to be.”

  “If your job wasn’t on the line, would you go for it?” Serenity must not have answered fast enough because Lexi kicked the bottom of her shoe. “Well, would you?”

  Out of nowhere, tears sprang to Serenity’s eyes. If she didn’t have to worry about her job, you bet she would. She nodded. “I’d look around for another job, except that’s not the problem. It’s because I’m Gideon’s mom. I’d have to find another school for him, and I’m not going to do that. I can already tell Hope is the right place for him. And I’d never ask Aaron to leave. Working at Hope is his career and he loves the kids. They depend on him. Where does that leave us?”

  Lexi leaned forward. “You’re the glass is half-empty kind of person. You weren’t like that before Jay.”

  Serenity sat up straight, her eyes narrowing. “Don’t start with that.”

  “You’re such a compassionate, intelligent woman. You’re an amazing mom. I don’t understand why you can’t see that in yourself. You spend your life waiting for the other shoe to drop.” Lexi reached over and put a hand on Serenity’s arm. “If there’s one thing I’ve always wished for you, it’s that you’d have a little faith in yourself. It’s still my hope.”

  Tears fell then and Serenity pushed down her frustration. She was sick and tired of crying. Part of her wanted to tell Lexi to mind her own business. But a piece of the armor around her heart broke away — a shield she hadn’t even realized was in place.

  “I’m not sure I know how to be any other way.” She sniffed and used her sleeve to wipe away the wetness on her cheeks.

  Lexi put an arm around Serenity’s shoulder and hugged her. “It’s never too late to change. I’ll be praying for you.” She got up and went back inside.

  Alone, Serenity took the time to compose herself. The last thing she wanted to do was to go back inside and make Grams worry about her.

  Lexi’s words kept replaying themselves in her mind. What if she was right? When had she become a glass-half-empty kind of person? She didn’t want to be like that. She wanted to be the type that could find a silver lining in everything.

  “God, the way I think is as much of a habit as anything else. Please remind me as I go through my day to look at the bright side of things.”

  Her mind went to Aaron and their situation. Where was the silver lining in that? Grams’ voice came to mind. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

  Seriously? How cliché was that?

  Except, when she realized she was reacting simply to the thought of him, she wondered if it might be true. Was he feeling the same way?

  Chapter Eighteen

  Serenity went into work Monday and wavered between longing to see Aaron again and dreading the thought of having to feign disinterest in front of everyone else.

  From the moment he walked into the breakroom at lunch, the air nearly sparked with the energy they shared. How was she supposed to go back to being just friends when she wanted to feel his hand around hers?

  Once they were seated and eating, he gave her a smile. “I see you left a part of you behind.”

  It took her a minute before she reached up and touched her hair with a chuckle. “Yes, I felt like it was about time. It’s definitely taking some getting used to.”

  His eyes held hers. “It’s beautiful.”

  “Thank you.” Serenity’s face warmed.

  “Did you have a good time in Kitner?”

  She welcomed the change in topic. “I did. It was nice going back. Grams had a great birthday party and I got to meet her new suitor.”

  “Really? A suitor? Good for Grams.”

  Serenity chuckled. “It’s been a long time since Gramps passed away. I’m glad she has a second chance at happiness like this.”

  “How’d Gideon do with everything? Did it shake him up at all having to come back again?” Aaron jabbed a fork into his re-heated pasta.

  “I was a little worried about that. But he did fine and looked forward to getting back to his room again. He had a great time seeing everyone, though. Especially Tuck.” She withdrew a chip from the bag on the table and tossed it into her mouth. “They’ve always be
en close and Gideon’s really missed him.”

  “They’re lucky to have each other.”

  She gave a nod in what she hoped expressed her appreciation for his comment. Despite how things turned out between her and Aaron, it’d been worth moving there for the chance to meet him. Because even if nothing ever went further than it did right now, she would never forget how he’d made her feel.

  Tears burned in her throat. She tried to blink them — and her thoughts — away but wasn’t fast enough. Aaron must have seen something in her eyes because now he was watching her, concern etched into his features.

  “Serenity?”

  She raised a hand to stop him. “Please, don’t. I’m fine.” Her eyes darted to the door as someone stepped in. She hadn’t realized how nervous she was to have Cynthia see them together until the sense of relief she felt when it wasn’t her.

  She hated this. Every minute of it. Because the one thing she wanted more than anything at that moment was the freedom to accept Aaron’s comforting embrace. She craved the strength and safety that it was sure to surround her with.

  Aaron didn’t seem remotely convinced but he maintained his seat and didn’t try to ask her anything else. His eyes never strayed far from her face, though. He cleared his throat. “Did I hear you and Gideon are coming to the basketball game tomorrow night?”

  “We’re planning on it if all goes well in the afternoon. I’m not sure how late we’ll stay, though.”

  He smiled at her. “It’s not usually too late. You’re sure to get a laugh or two at my expense.”

  “I doubt it. Letty assures me you’re quite good.”

  “I still intend on getting you onto that court at some point.” He winked at her.

  “Yeah, don’t hold your breath on that one.”

  They compared stories of playing basketball in the past until their lunch hour was up. Conversation flowed easily and it was almost as if they’d gone back to normal again. Almost.

  As they were about to part ways, Aaron’s expression was so intense it made her hands shake and her heart jump. He reached over, gave her arm a brief squeeze, and leaned close to her ear. “Don’t give up on us yet, Serenity.”

  His words settled on her heart. What exactly did they mean? She pondered every possible way she could interpret them until she was ready to go insane.

  ~

  Tuesday morning was unusually busy. Serenity was sorting through some paperwork on the desk when a shadow moved to block some of what she was reading. She looked up, completely shocked at the person grinning down at her.

  “Tuck? What are you doing here?”

  She stood and rushed around the desk to give him a hug. He lifted her briefly in his arms before setting her back down again. “I had a case that brought me to the area. I thought I’d come by and take my favorite little sister to lunch.”

  “Are you kidding? That sounds perfect! I go to lunch at one — another hour and a half. You’re welcome to stick around or come back. Whatever works better for you.”

  Maggie spoke from her chair at the other end of the desk. “Is this the infamous brother you’ve been telling me about?”

  Serenity blinked. “Of course! I’m sorry. Tuck, this is my co-worker and friend, Maggie. Maggie, this is my big brother, Tuck.”

  The two shook hands. Serenity gave Tuck a great deal of credit for not reacting to the woman’s bright green fingernails or the matching eyeshadow and hair highlights. Then again, she knew he saw a whole lot more in his line of work.

  “It’s good to meet you, Maggie.”

  “You as well.” Maggie turned her attention to Serenity. “We can trade lunch hours for today if you want to.”

  Tuck held up a hand. “The extra time will be good. I have a couple of things I want to do quickly before one. But I do appreciate your kind offer.” He turned back to Serenity. “Does that work for you?”

  “Yes. I have a few things I need to finish up here. And I need to let someone know I won’t be there for lunch today.”

  “Aaron?”

  Serenity’s eyes widened for a moment before narrowing. “Lexi spoke with you.” He shrugged. “Fantastic. And yes.” She shot him a glare she hoped made it clear she didn’t want to talk about it right now.

  “Then I’ll excuse myself and I’ll be back to pick you up right at one.”

  She gave him another hug and watched as he left the room. Before she got caught up in her paperwork again, she sent Aaron a quick text. She didn’t know if he’d bring Mexican food in today like he had in the past, but she sure didn’t want him to do that when she wasn’t going to be there.

  “He seems nice.” Maggie was grinning. “I saw the wedding ring. Too bad. Do you have any other brothers?”

  Serenity chuckled. “Nope, just the one. Which is probably a good thing, because I doubt I could have handled two.”

  ~

  Aaron had rounded the corner just in time to see some tall man engulf Serenity in a hug. From the joy on her face and the sparkle in her eyes, she clearly didn’t object. The whole scene filled him with unease as jealousy twisted in his gut.

  The last thing he wanted to do was watch the two of them interact so he headed back to his office. Who was the guy and what was he doing here? He didn’t think he’d seen anyone come visit her at work before. She hadn’t been in town long, where did she meet him? He didn’t recognize the guy from church.

  Less than ten minutes later, Aaron’s phone chimed with a text. He was pretty certain who it was from.

  “I’m not going to be able to meet you for lunch today. I’m sorry. Looking forward to tomorrow.”

  Aaron didn’t think it was too much of a stretch to assume she was going out with the guy she’d been hugging only minutes ago. Despite the instinct to go and deck the guy, he remained rooted in place.

  That he’d ever assumed he might be the only man she was interested in was absurd. A woman like Serenity — gorgeous, intelligent, and kind — had to have men expressing interest in her everywhere she went. What were the odds she’d choose him, especially with the added complication of their work situation?

  He fought against the wave of defeat that threatened to crash over him.

  ~

  “Did you really have a case in the area?” Serenity asked Tuck. They’d just been seated at a little diner down the street and were checking their menus.

  “I did. Though it wasn’t overly urgent, which gave me some of this extra time I’m taking advantage of.” He motioned to her menu. “Order whatever you want. It’s on me.”

  She smiled, appreciating his thoughtfulness. She didn’t have to peruse the food choices for long. The moment she saw the BLT and fries, she’d made her decision. “And I appreciate it. It’s always good to see you. I miss hanging out with you.”

  “I miss it, too.” He gave his order to the waitress and handed her his menu. Serenity followed suit.

  When the waitress disappeared, Serenity took her napkin and wadded it up before dropping it in her lap.

  “How’s Laurie today?”

  Their waitress came back with their drinks and Tuck thanked her.

  “She was doing great when I left. In fact, her energy level was making me tired.” He laughed. “I’m glad she’s not having as much morning sickness. That was hard to see.”

  Serenity nodded and took a sip of her strawberry lemonade. “I imagine so. I can’t wait until you guys find out if it’s a boy or a girl.”

  They chatted about baby stuff until their lunches were brought to them and then both quieted as they ate a few bites.

  Serenity’s sandwich tasted amazing. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d eaten bacon. Which probably was a crime in some country or another. She nodded at Tuck. “Lexi asked you to check in on me, didn’t she?”

  Tuck frowned at her. “No. I decided to do that on my own.”

  She rolled her eyes. “I’m fine. What all did she tell you?” The moment his expression turned incredulous, she chuckled. “Never min
d.” There were few secrets in the Chandler family. Most of the time it was a good thing. “I’m not a love-crazed teenager. And this is nothing like Jay. I chose to put some distance between Aaron and me. I’ll be fine.”

  “I know you will. But accepting help never hurts.”

  He was right. She swallowed past the catch in her throat. “Thanks,” she managed to say.

  “You’re welcome.” He pointed at her plate. “Eat.”

  She held up hands to stop him in mock seriousness. “Okay, okay.” Her mind went to Aaron, who was likely eating lunch in the breakroom right now. It reminded her of the game later in the evening. “Hey, how long are you going to be in town? I hope your case will be easy to wrap up.” She knew that he often couldn’t talk about an active case and wasn’t expecting any details.

  Tuck shook his head. “It should’ve been pretty painless. I have a couple of leads I needed to check up on, but they’re more like paper trails. I was hoping to get things tied up before now, but everything’s taking longer than I had planned. I may need to stay tonight if I have to go back and speak to someone involved in the case tomorrow.”

  “You know you’re welcome to stay at our house.”

  He ate a forkful of corn. “I appreciate that. I’ll have a better idea later this afternoon. I’ll call and let you know for sure.”

  “I promised a friend at church that Gideon and I would go to a basketball game at the gym there this evening. You’re free to join us if you do end up staying.”

  Tuck smiled. “Sounds like fun.”

  Serenity was supposed to be trying to keep her distance from Aaron. Yet, here she was, counting down the hours until she got to see him tonight. He’d said he intended to get her out on the court. Thinking about it released a whole swarm of butterflies in her stomach. Though at the moment, she wasn’t sure if it was in response to playing basketball for the first time in years, or the possibility of being close to Aaron while she was trying to convince herself they could be just friends.