Soul Surrender (The Soul Mark Series Book 3)

by Cara E Holt

  “You summoned the fabled Tuatha hound.” Lucifer states as he arrives at my side and looks down at the beast. “Failinis if my memory serves me correctly.” He observes me like I am some prized puzzle. “You are full of surprises my little Dae.” He looks over at my other hand and frowns. “Where did the sword go?”

  I shrug in response. I had no clue how I managed to summon it again. “I think it comes when I need it and then disappears again. I haven’t figured it out yet.”

  Lucifer nods. I can see his dark mind working overtime as he observes me. Always plotting. “It looks like the darkness in you is strong. You are even feeding like a real demon now.”

  I shudder, a feeling of horror washing over me. “Feeding?”

  He nods smirking. “You fed on the energy from that demon.” He leans in, looking me right in the eyes. “It feels good doesn’t it? To feed. That euphoric feeling, that rush. Your father used to love it.”

  My stomach drops and I feel nauseous. Is that what that was? Had I just fed like a demon again?

  I place my hand over Kols on my shoulder. “Can we go?”

  Lucifer gestures with his hand for us to leave. “Until tomorrow Ebony.” His voice is laced with promise and cunning and I close my eyes to shut him out as Kol takes my hand and whisks us out of there.

  When I feel the air change around us and I know without opening my eyes that we are back at his home, I throw myself into his chest and bury my head in the crook of his arm. He wraps his big tattooed arms around me and hugs me.

  “I’m proud of you.” He tells me and that brings a snigger from me.

  “Proud? I almost killed a demon back there and apparently I fed off of her. There was nothing about that to be proud of.”

  Kol pulls back and looks down at me. “Look at me Ebony.” Reluctantly I meet his gaze. “You didn’t kill her though, you pulled back. You took control.”

  I groan and rest my forehead on his chest. “I hate myself. I can’t believe I fed.”

  Kol takes my hand in his and leads me over to the kitchen. I sit myself down at the island and hold my head in my hands, reeling from all that has just happened. I see black in my vision and turn to see Failinis prowls into the room and drops himself down on the rug before the fire and close his eyes. It looks like my new pet is here to stay.

  “What if my dark side takes over Kol? What if next time I can’t control it?” I chew on my lip as I voice my deepest fears.

  Kol places a drink in front of me and rest his arms on the counter-top. “I know you flower. You are strong and you will always do what is right. Your human upbringing will keep you grounded. “

  I sigh and lower my head to the counter. I wish I had the same faith that he has in me. “I need to go home tomorrow. I need to tell the others about the sword. They are looking for it.”

  Kol nods as he takes a drink. “I’ll ask him.”

  I am surprised by his complete willingness. I had thought he would say a straight out no. “Okay good.”

  CHAPTER NINE.

  I nervously chew on my lip. I was finally here. So why wasn’t I charging in there to see him?

  “Are we staying out here all day flower?” His voice holds a tone of amusement in it.

  “No.” I frown. “I’m just you know.., preparing myself.”

  “Huh-uh.” He offers in reply and then he stalks off in front of me towards the house.

  “What are you doing?” I hiss as I chase after him.

  “It’s called knocking on the door.” He tells me with a smirk as he bangs loudly three times on the door.

  Cursing him under my breath I dart up the steps to stand beside him. I hold my breath when I hear footsteps and then the door swings open.

  My sister stands before me. She is barefoot and in jeans and a casual white sweater. Her hair is pulled into a messy bun on the top of her head. She stares for moment in shock, first at Kol and then at me.

  “Hi.” I say nervously with a wave. I see her eyes take in Kol again. “It’s okay, he doesn’t bite I promise.”

  Before I can say another word my sister grabs me and envelopes me in a tight hug. “I’ve missed you so much.”

  I smile into her hair. “I’ve missed you too sister.” I pull back from her, my smile dropping. “Is he home?”

  She gives me a sad look and nods and stepping back holds the door open for us to enter. I take a deep breath and pull my big girl pants up. Time to face the music.

  I walk into the living room and stop in my tracks when I see him. He is facing away from me, stood before the fireplace with his hand on the wall above it, looking down at the flames. My heart hammers in my chest at the sight of him. My mate. My reason for breathing. I know he can sense me, like I can him and he hasn’t turned around.

  “Lorcen.” I say softly, my voice thick with emotion.

  I see his shoulders tense in response to my voice. “You left.”

  I step further into the room but feel unable to approach him just yet. “I had no choice.”

  This brings a snigger from him and I wince. Still giving me his back he responds. “There was always a choice.” His voice is cold and tense. “You chose the easy option.”

  I look at him in disbelief and then storm over so I am right behind him. “Turn around and look at me! Please.”

  Slowly and somewhat reluctantly he turns and his angry green eyes meet mine and fuck, if it isn’t the best sight in the world. Night after night I have dreamed of those green eyes. Different emotions wash over his face as he looks at me, anger, hurt and relief. Then his gaze lifts over my shoulder and his eyes turn cold again.

  “You brought HIM into our home?”

  Sighing, I reach out to touch him and then I snatch my hand back when I remember the terms of being able to come here. I cannot touch him.

  “You could have stayed.” His voice is pained. “We could have fought this together. You took the easy option.”

  My jaw tightens. Okay, enough was enough. “You know what. Fuck you!” My eyes brim with unshed tears. “Leaving you was the hardest thing I have ever done. You know what though? I’d do it again in a heartbeat.” My eyes search his for some hope of understanding. “I would do anything to keep you safe, alive. Walking out of this house, away from you tore my fucking heart out Lorcen.”

  A tear escapes and runs down my face and his fierce gaze softens. He reaches out to wipe it away and I quickly take a step back before his fingers touch my face. He looks at me hurt. “Is my touch not welcome?”

  I shake my head, another tear falling. “God no. It’s not that. I’m not allowed any physical contact with you. Those were Lucifer’s terms to me coming here.”

  Lorcens jaw ticks and his fists clench at his side. He runs a frustrated hand through his dark locks. “I hate this.”

  I nod. “I hate it too.” I look at him longingly. “I want to throw myself in your arms and kiss the shit out of you and I can’t and it’s killing me. Don’t ever tell me this was easy for me again. Loving you is easy. Walking away from you that night, being apart from you. It kills me.”

  “Fuck Ebs, I’m sorry.” His eyes are awash with regret. He reaches out to touch me and then stops when he remembers he cannot touch me. He looks at me and gives me a sad smile. “I know why you did it. I would have done the same thing for you. I’d give up everything to keep you safe. I love you so much.”

  I grin at him through my tears. There are the words I wanted to hear. “I love you too.”

  He gives me his trademark dimple-inducing smile. “You cut your hair.”

  I nod and self-consciously tuck a strand behind my ear. “Yeah. That was kind of an impulsive decision.”

  He gives me a lopsided smile. “It looks good.” He looks me over then as if looking for signs that I am hurt or something. “Are you okay? I mean, how is it?”

  I shrug and lie. “It’s fine. I’m fine. I’m surviving.”

  My reply is met with his frown. “Alana felt you in pain the other night.”

>   I try to school my reaction. “Ah right, of course. Yeah, it was nothing. I’m honestly fine.”

  He takes a step closer to me so we are just an inch from touching. I close my eyes and breathe in his scent.

  “Your eyes are really red.”

  I nod and open mine to find him searching mine. “They are red all the time now. I think it’s being in the underworld, it brings out my demon side.”

  He nods and we stand there for a few seconds just drinking each other in. I memorise every detail of his perfect face.

  “How is everyone?”

  He bobs his head from side-to-side in response. “Mixed. Scott hasn’t taken it so well. Your sister here is spending every waking hour with Blaine searching for the sword.”

  “Ah shit. The sword. That’s what I need to tell you.” I pause and hold up a finger. “Actually it may better to show you.” I take a step back from him and hold my hands out palm up and close my eyes. A second later I feel the cold steel against my palms.

  “Is that what I think it is?”

  I open my eyes and find Alana leaning over me examining the sword in my hands. I nod.

  “It seems to come to me when I call it. A bit like the Griffindor sword in HP.”

  Alana rolls her eyes. “You and your HP! Obsessed.” In the little time that my sister and I had together, before I vacated for the underworld, she very quickly came to know of my obsession with anything Harry Potter related.

  “Oh and I have a wolf.” I look back to Kol. “Is it a wolf?” He shrugs in response and I turn back to Lorcen and Alana. “I kind of conjured him out of some freaky looking black smoke that came out of my fingers. He’s like huge and has creepy eyes.”

  Lorcen lifts his gaze from the sword and looks at me impressed. “You conjured a wolf?”

  I nod. “Apparently he’s a legendary Tuatha beast. He was a surprise, I can tell you.”

  Alana’s eyes are still on the sword. “I can’t believe we have been searching for it all this time and all you had to do was summon it.

  “I know.” I grimace. “Look I’ll make it disappear and then why don’t we see if you can summon it?”

  I close my eyes and sure enough the sword vanishes. “Okay.” I tell her. I grab her hands and hold them out in front of her palms up. “Now close your eyes and call upon it.”

  Alana screws her eyes up in concentration and we wait. She opens one eye and looks down at her hands and groans. “It didn’t work.”

  I sigh in frustration. “Close your eyes and try again. Maybe you weren’t willing it hard enough.”

  She closes her eyes again and tries again but again no sword appears. She looks down at her hands in disappointment.

  “At least if Alana can’t summon it that at least might mean that Leora can’t either.” Lorcen offers.

  I nod. I hadn’t thought about that. “That’s true. I wonder why it only comes when I call it though?” I look down at my watch remembering I am on limited time. “How long do I have?” I turn my head to ask Kol, who is still standing looking all foreboding in the doorway, arms folded.

  “Five minutes flower.”

  Lorcen tenses beside me when he hears Kol call me flower and I wince.

  “Hey.” Alana says walking over to Kol and wrapping her arm through his. “How about we go out to the yard and give these two some space.” Kol frowns but nods and allows her to guide him outside through the back of the house.

  I turn my gaze back to my mate who is staring daggers at the door where Kol has just vacated. “Hey. Stop frowning at the door and give me a smile. I need to see that smile that I have missed so much.”

  He drops his glare and returns his eyes to me and gives me that smile that turns my thoughts to mush. I groan and tilt my head back towards the ceiling. “Urgh. I want to kiss you so much right now.”

  “Ditto.” He replies, his voice thick with emotion. “When will I see you again?”

  My smile drops and I shrug. “Truthfully I don’t know. When Lucifer is not feeling like being a full-time arse I guess.”

  He nods, his brow furrowed. “Has he laid a finger on you? That demon in our yard.”

  “Kol? No he hasn’t. He’s actually been really good to me. I don’t think I could have got through what I have without his support.”

  Lorcen grimaces. “You can’t trust him, he’s a demon.”

  I laugh. “Hello, I’m part demon too.”

  He gives me a quick smile before his face turns all serious again. “You have a human heart though Ebs. You have been brought up knowing good from bad. He, well he was raised by Lucifer.”

  “I get it.” I tell him nodding. “I get why you are worried but I promise you he hasn’t laid a finger on me. Anyway. Can we not waste time talking about Kol?”

  He sighs and smiles. “Sorry you are right. I have missed you so fucking much.” He puts his hand near to mine so it is almost but not quite touching. “It’s hard to believe just a few months ago you weren’t a part of my life Ebony Wilde.”

  I grin like a big kid when he calls me by his surname. “Still getting used to that one, but I like it.”

  “It’s Christmas next week here in your human realm. You guys like to make a big deal about it huh?”

  I grin. “Oh yeah. Dad goes to town on the Christmas lights.”

  Lorcen chuckles. “I know, they are up. I’m surprised some planes haven’t accidentally landed on your driveway.” His smile drops away again. “They have invited us all over for Christmas dinner.”

  Even though it hurts to know I won’t likely be there with them. I am happy that all the people important to me will be together on the day. “That’s good. I will try Lorcen, but knowing Lucifer for the tosser he is, I doubt he’ll let me home.”

  He nods. “I know.” He grits his teeth. “I swear to you Ebs, I will stop at nothing until I have found a way to get you home.”

  A cough interrupts us and Kol and Alana are stood back in the room. Kol gives me a look that tells me my time is up.

  “I have to go.” I tell Lorcen with a sad smile. I would not cry. I will plaster on my brave face and leave him with a smile. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, I promise.”

  “I love you anam cara.”

  I grin. I love it when he talks in the old fae language to me. “Back at you fairy.” I offer him a playful wink. Alana rushes over and sweeps me into a hug.

  “Be strong.” She whispers into my ear.

  “I will. Look after him for me.”

  She pulls back and with tears in her eyes nods. “You know I will.”

  I turn to Kol. “Okay, let’s head back.” I walk over to Kol and follow him out of the house. I don’t look back as I close the front door behind us. I know if I look back, I will give in and I will run back to him and throw myself in his arms. I had to stay strong. I had to believe that someday soon, I would be back where I belong, by my mate’s side.

  CHAPTER TEN.

  ‘Save the child. The child who can open the gates to start a war to end all wars.’

  I wake up with a jolt and look around me, clutching the sheet at my chest. I rub at my ear where it felt like someone had just whispered those words to me. I still as I feel my stomach roll. I didn’t feel good. I heave and sift myself to the toilet bowl just in time. I vomit until there is nothing left in my stomach. I jump out of my skin when I feel a hand at my neck.

  “You okay?” Kol asks as he holds my hair back away from my face.

  “Urgh. I think so.” I groan. “I hate puke.”

  Kol reaches around me and puts a hand on my forehead. “You don’t feel warm.”

  “Do immortals even get sick?” I grab some toilet paper and wipe my mouth.

  Kol frowns. “Actually no. Iron can weaken Fae and salt can weaken demons but no, we don’t get sick.”

  I stand up and flush the toilet. “I need a drink.”

  Instantly he is at the sink and runs the tap. He hands me a glass of water. “Thanks.”

  He frowns watc
hing me, looking concerned. “Maybe we shouldn’t train today.”

  “I’m fine.” I insist as I take my toothbrush, needing to get rid of the vomit taste in my mouth.

  He leans against the vanity at the side of me. “It’s not like there’s any rush now. Devlon can’t get to the sword and activate the cauldron.”

  I scoff. “Devlon is cunning and smart. Everyone underestimates how smart he is.”

  I walk back into the bedroom and smile when I see Failinis flaked out on the bed, taking up most of it.

  “That mutt shouldn’t be on the bed. He’s getting far too comfy.”

  I raise a brow. “I’ll let you tell him to get down then?”

  He laughs as he walks past me and out through the door to the living room. “Not a chance. I like my head where it is on my shoulders.”

  I chuckle as I walk over to where the beast is spread out on my bed. He opens one red eye and nudges my hand with his nose. “You want a tickle Boy?” To everyone else he may look fierce and deadly but he sure would let me stroke him for hours if he could get away with it. “Come on boy. You know he doesn’t like you on the bed.”

  Failinis gives me a rumble in protest but as soon as I stand he moves off the bed and follows me into the main living space.

  “So what Demonic skills do you plan on teaching me today? I ask him as I pour myself some more water. I think it would be a dry piece of toast for breakfast this morning.

  He sits there with no top on and black joggers. It was hard not to appreciate how good he looked. The demon was sin on legs. He winks at me when he catches my eyes on his chest.

  “I was thinking mind manipulation.”

  “Mind manipulation.” I repeat. I wasn’t sure I wanted to be able to manipulate someone’s mind but I guess if it could work on someone like Devlon then it would be a skill worth having.