Never Kiss a Highlander
Page 9
Selah gave Mairead’s arm a little squeeze. “Robert believes otherwise.”
Then Robert is a fool, Mairead thought to herself. And so am I for believing Hamish was going to be the salvation of not just Foinaven . . . but me.
Mairead shuddered, recalling Ulrick’s last words to her. She had seen the cold look in his eyes when he had said he wanted Foinaven and he wanted her, and nothing would prevent him from either goal.
Mairead might not be able to stop his army and she could not leave, but it was possible to keep Ulrick from using her to secure his position. Despite his threats, she could marry someone—she just needed to choose the right Highlander. He needed to be a man who could not only help defend Foinaven, but one who could protect himself from Ulrick’s vengeance. Before Hamish arrived, she had only one viable option—the Mackays.
Clan Mackay lay on their western border and rumors held that they were ruthless warriors, who protected what was theirs through any means necessary. No one at Foinaven ever met any of the Mackays and most did not want to. Traveling merchants had told too many tales of how hostile they could be to anyone posing a threat to their people or the lands they occupied.
Unfortunately, marrying a stranger belonging to a ruthless clan was fraught with danger, for her husband could turn out to be someone just like Ulrick. He also might not be content to be commander and seek to overthrow Robert. Then she would be responsible for everyone’s downfall, including her own.
She had to change Hamish’s mind and ask for help.
Selah looked up and spied Hamish leaning on the doorframe. Mairead saw Selah’s smile and glanced toward the door. As soon as she saw Hamish, standing there relaxed as if he had been there some time, her temper threatened to explode again. “Why am I surprised? Of course you are here. You probably listened to the entirety of our conversation.”
“Only the last part about you being upset about my not bringing men so that you can find a suitable husband,” Hamish replied with a wink, unable to stop himself.
Mairead’s jaw went slack. “How many ways and times do I need to say this? I do not want a husband!” she shouted.
Selah clucked her tongue. “Remember little Rab,” she whispered.
Mairead took a step toward him. “I do not want a husband,” she reiterated, this time in a harsh whisper. “What I want is for Foinaven and its clansmen to be safe from Ulrick and his schemes to take over.”
Hamish stared down into her hazel eyes and saw that she spoke the truth. “Then you no longer have to worry.”
This time it was Selah who swallowed and looked at him anxiously. “So you agreed to stay and help Robert convince Ulrick that he should find another home?”
He matched her serious tone and replied, “I did.”
Mairead took in a deep breath and exhaled. Her shoulders relaxed and she gave him a dazzling smile. He had not realized it, but this was the first time he had seen her smile. He thought her fiery temper made her tempting, but when she smiled, the world seemed to fade away.
“I assume it’s too late to send word tonight, but I will have the herald ready for you in the morning to send word to Laird McTiernay.”
Hamish crossed his arms and pretended to look puzzled. “Why? I already explained to you that I have no intentions of asking Conor McTiernay for help, and that especially includes any men.”
“But you just said—”
Hamish felt his jaw tense. For a few seconds, sheer terror—not anger—had reflected in her eyes. That kind of fear was deeply personal. Was it concern for her sister and the future of the clan? Or something more?
“I said I would help Robert deal with Ulrick. And I promise that I don’t need the McTiernays to help me with this task.”
Task? Mairead mouthed. “You may be the best swordsman in all of Scotland, but that is going to be of little use when Ulrick returns with a few dozen mercenaries at his side.”
Hamish could not help himself from grinning and rocked back on his heels. “Best swordsman in all of Scotland . . . I like the sound of that.”
Selah chuckled. “If you thought Hamish was arrogant before, he definitely is now, thanks to your flattery.”
Mairead glared at Hamish. “I wasn’t flattering him, I was insulting him.”
Hamish leaned down and whispered in her ear, “To be insulted by the prettiest lass in Scotland is the best flattery I have ever received.”
“I give up,” Mairead replied, and headed toward the door. She paused at the door, glanced at him, and then looked back at her sister. “That is what I was trying to tell you. Hamish and his overconfidence are going to endanger us all.”
Hamish watched her leave, completely intrigued. “She’s feisty.”
Selah narrowed her gaze. “And by the sparkle in your eye, I’m guessing you like feisty.”
Hamish put his hand up to stop her from saying anything more. “I only admit to enjoying a woman who can argue her mind.”
Selah licked her lips and studied him for a minute. “I’m glad that you understand Mairead is family, but right now I’m more concerned about Robert and what you told him. Can you do what you promised . . . um, regarding Ulrick?”
“We have yet to resolve all the details. But Selah, you must know whatever solution I put into place will not stop others in the future, not if Robert continues to lead the way he has been.”
Selah gave him a kiss on the cheek and smiled. “Robert only needs you to handle Ulrick. He has the future firmly in hand.”
An unexpected jolt of jealousy shot through Hamish. For the first time in twelve years he wished he had what Robert did. He longed not for Selah nor the feel of her soft lips on his skin.
He wished for something far more profound—that someone trusted and had the same level of faith in him.
* * *
“Selah,” Hamish said, “it has been a long day and I would like to retire, but was hoping to change rooms.”
Selah blinked at the odd request but quickly recovered. “Of course, there is a room next to Rab’s the servants keep clean for he sometimes uses it to play in. But I warn you, he rises early and can be very loud. Mairead is on the other side of him and mentions it often. You really would be more comfortable on the first floor.”
“Would it be too much of an imposition to ask for the room on the bottom floor?”
Selah remembered Hamish stopping there earlier that evening to peek into the storage space. People may have thought her to be the kindly sort who did not look for ulterior motives in others, but that did not mean she never recognized them. “It would not be an imposition at all, but it is so drafty and we use it primarily for storage. The courtyard is just on the other side of the wall. Even little Rab would offer less noise.”
Hamish shrugged. His reasons for being on the bottom floor would make the sounds from a typical morning courtyard irrelevant. “The noise will not bother me and I noticed it already has a bed.”
Selah remained hesitant. She would not call the simple wooden frame a bed. It certainly was not a comfortable one. “Well, aye, it does, but Hamish, it has not been cleaned for use in some time, and the mattress is made of straw. I am not even sure the room has any wood for a fire.”
Selah widened her eyes and looked at him imploringly. Hamish could see again why he thought her to be so beautiful so many years ago. Her delicate features and serene and kind nature were indeed beautiful, but the pull and the allure she had over him were no longer there. He wondered if it would have dwindled if they had married so long ago. His gut told him to just be glad that Robert and she had fallen in love and were still happy.
“Selah, a soldier considers himself fortunate to rest his head on a straw mattress. Besides, I’ve been sleeping outside for days and last night took shelter in a barn. One more evening in the company of a little dirt will not be an issue.”
Selah pursed her lips together. She was used to persuading people to her point of view, not the other way around. But Hamish would not budge. He just stood a
nd looked pleadingly at her. At last, Selah bit back a smile. “You are not as charming as you believe you are.”
“Ah, but you agree that I am charming.”
“Aye, despite that awful beard of yours. Thankfully, my sister seems to be impervious to your efforts,” Selah said. She then picked up a candle and slid between him and the doorframe to head for the stairwell.
Hamish laughed and turned to follow. “I suspect Mairead is well acquainted with men’s flattery.”
Just before she reached the stairwell, Selah stopped and looked at him. “She is. She has had much practice in recent years in deflecting fanciful comments coming from your kind.”
Hamish said nothing and waited for Selah to continue. He was not surprised that Mairead had suitors. He was surprised to find that he was slightly jealous of the fact.
“Just remember that Mairead is my sister and that makes her part of your family.”
Hamish took the last step and exited the staircase. “I know who she is,” he said.
Mairead was many things, but he did not see her as a sister. But she was Selah’s, ensuring any desire he had for Mairead would remain only that. He was absolutely not going to act on those desires.
“Good,” Selah said, and stopped in front of a closed door. She placed a light hand on his arm. “Do not concern yourself about Mairead. She will come to appreciate your being here despite your lack of company. But you should know that you are at your most charming when you’re not trying not to be. Just be yourself.”
Hamish reached over and picked up her hand to kiss it. “I’ll remember that.”
Selah shook her head and said “I give up” as she opened the heavy door. There were several rooms on the ground floor, but this was the one he had peered into earlier. It was also the only one with a bed and a fireplace. The spaces of the others were smaller and built solely for storage of food, materials, and weapons. “It looks like I was mistaken. There are several large logs stacked near the hearth. It is cold and damp, but at least you will be able to make a fire.” Selah paused and looked at all the dust. “Are you sure you would not like to stay somewhere else, just until tomorrow night?”
Again, Hamish shook his head and stepped into the room. “Selah, this is fine,” he said with a satisfied sigh. “Besides, I think Mairead would prefer the additional distance between us. Now go. I know that you want to check on Robert before you retire.”
It was obvious he was trying to get rid of her and Selah once again felt the stirrings of curiosity. But she refused to yield to the temptation to ask him. Mostly because she knew it would be a waste of time.
“Hamish?” she asked, lighting the candle on a small table near the center of the room.
“Hmm?”
“I . . . just wanted to thank you for coming. I know it was a lot to ask after what happened. I did love you. I never lied about that. I just . . . with Robert . . .”
Hamish looked her directly in the eye, knowing it had taken everything Selah had to bring up the topic. But he was glad she did. For just as his brother needed to hear Hamish felt no animosity toward him, Selah needed the same. “All really is well, Selah. I have learned the difference between love and being in love. And you were right to follow your heart.”
“It’s just in following my heart, I broke yours. I’ve always regretted hurting you. I never wanted that.”
Hamish was tempted to say that what she did to him was far more than break his heart. She took his future and nothing she said now would change that. But then neither would pointing out that painful fact. It was done and one of the main reasons he had returned was to put the past behind them so they could all move on. “That wound was mended long ago. I’m happy for you and Robert, and I want you to be happy for me.” Hamish came forward and took Selah’s delicate hands into his own. “I am more than content with the McTiernays. They respect me as a fighter and the ladies even appreciate my charm,” he said with a wink.
Selah felt something tight within her finally relax. She rose on her tiptoes and kissed him once more on his hairy cheek. “You are more than a fighter, Hamish. You’ve always been so much more. And I am so glad you have finally come home.”
Hamish moved to the door and opened it a little wider, said good night for a final time, and then closed it. Another time he would point out that he was not home and that Foinaven had not been his home for a long time. He was merely a visitor.
Turning around, he walked toward the overly large fireplace and placed the candle on the simple wooden mantel. One poke proved the logs were rotten, but more important, that it had been a long time since the hearth had been used. Hamish quickly removed them, stepped inside, and began to slide his hand along the stones. After a couple minutes, he found a groove around a large stone and followed it. He smiled feeling the thick layer of grime. No one had been here in many years. The room did not require the sizeable hearth, but it seemed no one had ever been curious to find out just why it had one.
This room and its fireplace were one of the first things he and his father had built when they first started renovating the keep. Being new to Foinaven, they were unsure how welcome they would be and created a secret passageway leading from the castle to a tunnel, which ended just outside the village. Hamish wondered if his father had ever told anyone about it. Perhaps it had been forgotten. Hamish hoped one or both possibilities were true, for being able to come and go without anyone knowing was going to be very helpful in keeping much of his plan a secret. Secrecy added complications—just one of which would be trying to explain his absence—but it also added a level of freedom.
Hamish put his shoulder on the deceptive stone and pushed. He felt it shift and then shoved against it once more. It was large but not very thick, making it look far too heavy to move. Feeling the air on the other side, he stepped back into the room, grabbed a torch, and lit it using the candle. He then stepped back inside and examined the passageway to see if it was still clear. It was. Hamish followed it, burning cobwebs along the way until it ended.
Surprisingly, it was not overgrown brush that blocked the way out but a decaying barrel. Hamish nudged it with his knee. As suspected it was empty and easy to maneuver. Stepping out of the tunnel, he was relieved to see that the large boulder marking the exit was still there, but the massive rock was no longer outside of the village boundaries. Now it was definitely within them. Thankfully, the hour was late and no one was about.
Hamish looked around as best he could and decided the situation was not as bad as he first thought. The area around the boulder was being used to dump unwanted and broken items. Most looked like they had been there for a while. It was almost perfect. Carefully Hamish tilted a rotted cart so that it hid the opening without actually blocking it. Being in the shadows gave him easy access in and out, but it also enabled him to stay hidden and wait for the right time to join the village crowds without being seen.
Returning back to his room, he started a fire and sat on the edge of the bed, trying to ignore the stink from the fumes. Deciding it was worth it to be warm, he lay down and let his thoughts drift to all that had happened that day. One person in particular kept coming to mind: Mairead.
For some reason, he could not control his thoughts—or his words—whenever he was around her. After she left the kitchens, he had left as well, deciding to bathe in the river rather than the warm water. He told himself it was because her scented soap had caused the water to smell feminine. But, in truth, he required something far more frigid to get his body back under control.
After washing in the cold waters of River Naver, he had vowed to stop saying anything that would get things heated between them. It was not as if he wanted to flirt with Mairead. He had not flirted with anyone in months. He had been acting on some strange survival instinct. She had made him uneasy, and he had needed her to be just as uncomfortable.
Hamish rubbed his temples and focused on his brother. It had not taken more than a few minutes of conversation to realize Robert was exactly who
he expected him to be—a well-intentioned but weak-willed leader. That discovery changed none of his plans, however. Hamish refused to put in permanent measures that would ensure Robert remained laird. That was his brother’s responsibility. And unless he changed, someday—probably sooner than later—someone would seek and successfully take advantage of Robert and his pacifist style of leadership.
But it would not be Ulrick.
Hamish may have come alone, but despite what Mairead thought, a large army was not what was needed. Ulrick was about to discover just what one man who had lived and fought alongside the McTiernays could do.
* * *
Selah sat down at the small table and unpinned her braided hair from its knot. She began to finger the long braid, unraveling it from its weave, when Robert started coughing. By its thick sound, she knew he was also having trouble breathing. It happened every winter and he always got well, but that did not stop her from worrying.
“You are getting worse.”
Robert drew in deep breaths and grimaced from the pain in his throat. How he hated this time of year. “My throat and chest, aye, are not improving as fast as I would like, but my heart and mind are finally at peace. Yours should be as well, sonuachar.”
“Do you truly believe Hamish will stay?” Selah twisted so that she could look and see if he spoke the truth when he answered.
Robert’s eyes were closed and he was leaning back against the propped-up pillows, but he was also smiling. “Aye, at least for now. I told you he would.”
“It was still a great risk you took to get him here.”
“There was very little risk, sonuachar. I have yet to meet a more honorable or loyal man than my brother. Who else would have stepped aside for us the way Hamish did?”
Selah wiggled out of her gown so that she stood only in her chemise. “I do not think there are many.”
Robert sighed, which resulted in another brief coughing spasm. “Give up everything for the love and happiness of a younger brother? Nay, Selah. Only Hamish. That’s why I knew he would come and why I knew he would help.” He opened his eyes and held her gaze. “And that is why I know my plan will work. I know my brother.”