Marrying the Cowboy
Page 13
“Exactly. We’re friends.”
“Lots of couples start out as friends.”
“We’re not a couple. We’re... I don’t really know what we are now.”
“And you’re avoiding him. That’s why you didn’t know he was injured.”
Elissa nodded. “I kept hoping it was just an infatuation and would go away. But it’s not. If anything, it’s growing stronger.” She dropped her face into her hands for a moment before looking at her friends again. “What am I going to do? I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”
“After you kissed, how did he act?”
“That’s when he got the call about the fight and had to leave. But he seemed fine.” At least she hoped so.
“Then go with it, see what happens. You never know, true love could have been right under your nose the entire time.”
“Or maybe I should just act as if nothing happened. I mean, he’ll likely be leaving Blue Falls soon anyway. He applied to the state police academy again, and he doesn’t have anything preventing him from going this time.”
“Then you need to make your move before it’s too late.”
“I don’t know.” Elissa shifted her attention to Skyler, who’d been unusually silent on the topic. “What do you think?”
Skyler didn’t answer immediately, which made Elissa’s stomach clench.
“Skyler?”
“I want you to be happy, but I’m not sure this is the right thing to do.”
“What?” India’s surprise was evident in her tone.
“I’m not trying to be mean, but I’m afraid Pete will get hurt. He’s a good guy and has lost too much already.”
“Elissa would never hurt Pete. You know that.”
Skyler glanced at India. “Not intentionally.” She shifted her gaze back to Elissa. “But you like to flit from guy to guy, and there’s nothing wrong with that when there’s no danger of hurting someone. But think about how Pete is. He’s a commitment kind of guy. If you’re not ready to commit to him wholeheartedly, I don’t think you should string him along.”
Elissa didn’t know whether to be sad or angry, but both emotions twisted up inside her. At the same time, she knew Skyler was right. When had she ever stuck with one guy for more than a couple of weeks? She couldn’t even explain why she was the way she was, not when her parents had a loving marriage and she’d given up the traveling life for a more stable, settled one. Was it her way of still holding on to a little of the carefree existence she’d known the first fifteen years of her life? Had she just not found the right person to make her change her ways?
Could Pete be that person? Was it possible that India was right and true love had been right under her nose the entire time? Did she love Pete? Of course she did, but was it romantic love? She had no idea how she could distinguish between the love she’d always felt for her friend and what might be more than that.
“Don’t listen to Skyler,” India said. “Listen to your heart.”
“No, she’s right. Pete deserves to have someone special.”
“You’re special.”
Elissa shoved her chair back. “I can’t deal with this right now. I have too much else to deal with.” She stood. “See you at the party.”
She heard India call her name as she walked away, but she didn’t stop or acknowledge it. She had to get out of the building before the echo of Skyler’s words caused her to dissolve into tears.
* * *
PETE PAUSED HALFWAY down the corridor to Skyler’s office at the Wildflower Inn. He didn’t know why he was hesitant to ask about renting the apartment she’d vacated. After all, Elissa’s avoidance of him for the past couple of days told him loud and clear that his kissing her had been the mistake he’d feared. Damn it, why had he listened to his desire instead of what little common sense he possessed?
He stared at the door that led to Skyler’s former apartment. What better day than his birthday to gift himself with his own space again? He could come and go as he liked without worrying about Verona’s matchmaking or making Elissa uncomfortable. Or torturing himself by being so near Elissa, knowing that he’d screwed everything up.
With renewed determination, he walked the rest of the way to Skyler’s office and knocked on the open door.
Skyler looked up from her desk and seemed startled to see him. “Pete. What are you doing here?”
He hadn’t considered that Elissa might have told India and Skyler about the kiss, but now he had to wonder. Deciding it didn’t matter, he gestured behind him. “I was hoping I could rent your old apartment if it’s not already spoken for.”
“Oh. Well, no. Something wrong at Verona’s?”
Hell, she definitely knew about the kiss. He clamped down on the need to ask her what Elissa had said. “No, but I’ve imposed enough.”
Skyler looked as if she was holding back some questions of her own. “I’ve still got a lot of my stuff in there, so I’d need some time to get it out.”
“That’s no problem.”
“It’ll have to wait until after the weekend. Logan and I are getting married Saturday out at the ranch. We’d love for you to be there.”
He smiled for what felt like the first time in days. “Congratulations.” He was truly happy for her, same as he was when India and Liam tied the knot. But another part of him felt hollow, particularly today.
That empty feeling weighed him down all day during his shift. It might seem silly but he missed the fact that he wasn’t going to have a birthday cake made by his mom. Even when she’d been ill that last year of her life, she’d rallied long enough to bake him a cake and write “I love you, Petey” on the top. She hadn’t called him that since he was a little boy, and something about that moment, her slipping into the past in even the simplest way, had made him realize she wasn’t going to win the fight this time. He was going to lose her, be left totally alone.
He didn’t make a habit of feeling sorry for himself, but every once in a while it snuck up on him.
He was about to ask Connor if he wanted to hit the Stein tonight when his phone rang. When he checked the screen, his heart jumped a bit. But Elissa wouldn’t be home this time of day. No, like every other day, she would work at the nursery until well after dark. He didn’t even know what she could be doing out there so much, not until the building was repaired.
Pushing away questions he couldn’t answer, he answered, “Hey, what’s up?”
“Pete, hon. I was wondering if you might come straight home after your shift. I seem to have a plumbing issue I’m not quite strong enough to fix myself.”
Everything else she said faded for a moment as he focused on the word home and how Verona’s house wasn’t his home at all. He didn’t have one. No family, no home and likely no more friendship with Elissa.
He silently cursed himself and refocused on Verona’s problem. “What’s going on?”
“The pipe under the kitchen sink is leaking.”
“You need me to come over there now?”
“No, no need. It’ll wait a few more minutes. I’ve got a bucket under there.”
“Okay, be there in a bit.”
The last fifteen minutes of his shift crawled by. How sad was it that he was actually looking forward to playing plumber? That said a lot about the state of his life right now. Maybe he’d hear from the academy soon, and he could just start over somewhere else besides Blue Falls. Maybe that’s what he needed, a clean break.
When he pulled into the driveway, he wasn’t the least bit surprised to see Elissa wasn’t home. He had to talk to her soon, find out from her own lips whether he was right in his assumption that she didn’t want to get any more involved than that one kiss in the dark when she’d been upset and in need of comfort.
He stepped through the door from the garage expecting to s
ee Verona in the kitchen. Instead, he jumped as a houseful of people yelled, “Surprise!”
He scanned the room as Logan popped a balloon and several people blew noisemakers that reminded him of New Year’s Eve.
Verona stepped forward with a huge smile on her face. “Happy birthday, hon.” She lifted up on her toes and kissed him on the cheek.
“You are one sneaky woman.”
“I might have had a little help.” She winked and nodded toward her left.
He glanced that way and saw Elissa leaning against the chair where Verona usually sat to do her knitting or to read. She gave him a small, tentative smile that lifted his hopes probably more than it should.
Over the next few minutes, he found himself talking to one well-wisher after another. And then Keri Teague brought out the cake. As soon as he looked at it, he laughed. It wasn’t one of her usual beautiful creations. Well, he was sure the cake itself was good, but on the top she’d drawn a cartoon cop with a huge black eye. Underneath were the words her husband had spoken to Pete the night of the bar fight. “Duck next time.”
Pete allowed Keri to serve him a huge piece of cake including the black eye portion of the icing before moving out of the way so others could get slices. He made his way over to stand next to Elissa.
“Skyler was right,” she said. “You do have quite the shiner.”
He lifted his slice of cake. “A fact I don’t think I’m going to live down any time soon.”
She smiled, a real smile this time, and the mere sight of it was the best gift he could have received. Maybe things would be okay between them after all.
“I’m sorry if what I did the other night was wrong,” he said low so no one else could hear him.
Elissa glanced around the room. “It’s fine.”
Fine as in she didn’t hold it against him, or fine as in she wouldn’t mind it happening again? Damn, why were women so hard to read?
“Come on now, birthday boy,” Verona said once everyone had their cake. “You’ve got presents to open.”
“I suddenly feel five years old,” Pete said to Elissa.
“Who knows, maybe there will be a toy train in your presents.”
He smiled at her, glad that their friendship was still intact. He tried not to think about how he wouldn’t mind there being more between them.
As he headed for the chair Verona indicated, he looked at the faces surrounding him. “You all didn’t have to do this.”
“Yeah, we did,” Simon said. “Or Verona was going to find new and interesting ways to make us wish we had.”
Verona swatted Simon on the arm. “Hush, you.”
After some laughter and a bit more teasing, Pete started opening presents. Dishes and a toaster oven were followed by a couple of gift cards from Grater’s ShopMart. He had thought he was done when Elissa handed him a box covered in blue-striped paper.
“Thanks.”
“You don’t even know what it is yet.”
“Well, unless there’s a live lizard in here, I think I’m safe in my thanks.”
As he met her gaze, he thought he saw anticipation there. Curious, he pulled the top off the box. Inside was a photo album covered in old newspaper clippings. His heart ached for a moment at the thought of all the pictures he’d lost. He no longer had a single photo of his parents, and he feared losing the memory of what they looked like.
He opened the album to see what clippings were on the inside cover, but his breath caught as soon as he saw what was inside. There on the first page was an eight-by-ten image of him with his parents when he was about seven. He was holding the trophy he’d won in Little League baseball. A lump forming in his throat, he flipped the pages to see copies of his school photos, candid shots taken at community events, several from his team-roping days, a picture a bunch of them had taken together during their senior prom. His eyes went right to Elissa, wearing that long gold dress with her dark hair piled up on top of her head. She’d looked every bit the beauty queen she’d been.
He realized in that moment that his new attraction toward her wasn’t new at all. Somewhere deep down, that first crush he’d had on her when they were fifteen hadn’t gone away. But he’d buried it so far down inside himself that he hadn’t consciously realized an ember still existed. Being near her had simply blown enough air on it for it to flicker into a flame. And the kiss, well...enough with the fire analogies.
He paused halfway through the album when he came to a picture of the two of them sitting at her kitchen table putting together that Roman Coliseum diorama they’d had to make for history class. He smiled at the memory of her threatening to smack him upside the head if he didn’t stop staging fights between their clay gladiators that usually ended in one or both losing a limb or even a head.
His heart swelling, Pete looked up and met Elissa’s eyes. He knew how much work it must have taken for her to track down these photos to copy. That she’d done so while going through so much touched him so deeply that he suddenly wished they were alone.
“Thank you. This means a lot to me.” So much more than anything money could buy.
“You’re welcome.”
Over the next several minutes, he got drawn into one conversation after another. If any of the people around him were paying attention, they would notice how often his gaze shifted to wherever Elissa was in the room. Though he appreciated everyone attending the party, he was glad when they began to leave.
India, Skyler and their other halves were the last to depart. There was something different in Skyler’s eyes when she pulled back from giving him a hug, but he couldn’t identify it. He didn’t have a chance to ask, either, since India reached up to give him a kiss on the cheek before ushering Skyler out the door.
After closing the front door behind them, he turned to see Verona exit the kitchen.
She glanced over her shoulder to where Elissa was stuffing the last of the dirty paper plates in the trash. “I don’t know about you two, but I’m beat,” Verona said. “I’m calling it a night.”
Pete crossed the room and pulled the older woman into his arms. “Thank you, for everything.”
Verona patted his back. “You deserved it, sweetie.” She stepped away. “Now I’m taking my old, creaking bones to bed.”
As she headed down the hall, neither he nor Elissa moved until they heard Verona’s door shut. When he finally looked at Elissa, she reminded him of a rabbit poised to bolt away.
“Thank you for the album,” he said, feeling at a loss about how to start a conversation now that their kiss stood between them.
She smiled a little. “You said that already.”
“I mean it. No one’s ever gotten me anything that means more.”
She met his gaze and thankfully didn’t look away. “I knew it’s what I’d want if I were in your situation.”
A long, awkward moment stretched between them before they both started to speak at the same time.
“I better go to bed, too,” she said.
As she moved to follow in Verona’s footsteps, an unexpected but desperate need to keep her from leaving gripped Pete. “Wait.”
She looked back at him, a questioning look in her eyes but nervousness tensing her body.
“Would you like to go for a walk?”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
He took a step toward her. “Why not?”
“You know why.”
“Because we kissed.”
Elissa looked nervously down the hall. “Yeah. I don’t want you getting the wrong idea.”
His chest tightened. “What wrong idea would that be?”
“That it was more than it was. I had a weak moment, nothing more.”
He’d questioned enough people since becoming a cop to know when someone wasn’t telling the
truth. It was even easier with Elissa since he knew her so well. His heart leapt at the fact that right now Elissa was being less than truthful. “I don’t believe you.”
“Pete—”
He closed the rest of the distance between them. “Tell me you didn’t like it. Tell me that truthfully and I’ll never bring it up again.”
When she opened her mouth to speak, a flood of uncertainty seized his body. Could he have been wrong? But she couldn’t say the words, not without lying.
Pete lifted his hand to the side of Elissa’s face, marveling at the softness of her skin. “You’re not the only one who’s been wondering if we made a mistake.”
She looked up at him, a sliver of hurt in her eyes. “So you think it was?”
“I don’t know. I hope not.”
“Because we’re friends?”
He nodded. “I don’t know when it changed, but it did. I can’t stop thinking about you.”
He saw a fear in her eyes he’d never seen before. In that moment, he wanted nothing more than to erase that fear, to guarantee that there was no reason for her to feel it. But how could he do that when he wasn’t sure himself?
Their history flashed through his mind, and it came to him. He’d treat her like always, just with some kissing thrown in. He smiled at the thought. “Since it’s my birthday, you could just say that any kissing was part of my present.”
She lifted an eyebrow at that, a reaction so like the normal Elissa that a bit of his anxiety faded. “That’s a line if I’ve ever heard one.”
He shrugged. “I’m a guy. What can I say?”
She grew serious again. “That if we give in to this, you promise it won’t ruin what we already have. I can’t stand the idea of losing you as a friend because we did something stupid.”
Moving slowly, he took another step closer to her and ran his hand into her hair at the back of her head. His heart beating fast, he leaned toward her. “I promise,” he said just before he captured her lips with his.
Chapter Eleven
Fear bolted through Elissa as Pete’s lips met hers. They were no longer cloaked in darkness, and she couldn’t hide behind the excuse of having had a horrible day full of upsetting news. They couldn’t claim it was a onetime thing.