A Mother’s Sacrifice

by Kitty Neale

  ‘Oh, I’m sorry, Johnnie. What’s happened?’

  ‘Er … an old aunt has passed away.’

  ‘Oh, dear, were you close?’ Polly asked as she poured cups of tea.

  ‘No, not really.’

  Harry took the cup of tea Polly handed him, but as she gave one to Johnnie, she quickly kissed him. He felt his stomach turn and then, when she sat down next to Johnnie on the sofa, she rested her hand on his thigh. It looked so intimate and, feeling bile rise in his throat, Harry surged to his feet. ‘No! I can’t be doing with this, it ain’t right!’ he bellowed.

  ‘Dad, no … don’t say anything!’

  ‘It’s revolting, that’s what it is, absolutely fucking vile, and I can’t allow it! Either you tell her, right now, or I will!’ he yelled. He could see that his outburst had frightened Polly, and memories flooded back of the times he had seen Glenda looking at him like that.

  Polly must have been made of stronger stuff, though, because she seemed to quickly recover. ‘Tell me what? What’s going on?’ she asked, looking at Johnnie, who refused to meet her gaze.

  Johnnie only hung his head, shaking it, so Harry said, ‘I’m sorry, Polly, but there’s something you need to know. You see –’

  Johnnie interrupted, ‘Dad, no – wait – you can’t do this.’

  ‘I have to. Apart from anything else, what you’re doing is illegal. It’s wrong, and you know it is. It’s got to stop. Now let me get this over with and finish what I was saying.’

  ‘Dad!’

  ‘Shut up, Johnnie. Now then, Polly, the thing is, I was married to your mother, Glenda.’

  Polly screwed her face up quizzically. ‘I don’t understand,’ she said.

  Harry knew he wasn’t very good at explaining things, but he did his best. ‘Me and your mum, we had Johnnie, but she left me when he was a baby. She took off with your father and left Johnnie behind.’

  ‘But … but … I don’t understand.’

  Harry could see from the blank expression on Polly’s face that the penny still hadn’t dropped and knew he would have to spell it out for her. He felt awful telling her like this. It should have come from Johnnie, but not only was his son a pervert, he was spineless too. ‘Look, love, the thing is, Johnnie is your half-brother.’

  For a moment there was no reaction from the girl, just a stunned silence, but as comprehension dawned she suddenly leaped from the sofa. ‘Get out! Get out, the pair of you! Go on, get out, get out, get out!’ she screamed, waving her arms, almost pushing Johnnie and Harry out of the lounge and down the hallway.

  ‘Polly, let me explain,’ Johnnie begged, but his voice was hardly heard over her shrieks.

  ‘I don’t want to hear another word from you – ever! Just go, get out!’

  Harry pulled Johnnie outside, but he stood on the doorstep, still trying to plead with Polly until the door slammed in his face. Johnnie banged repeatedly on it and called out Polly’s name.

  ‘Come on, Johnnie. Leave the girl in peace. You’ve done enough damage,’ Harry bluntly told his son.

  Only then did Johnnie turn to walk away.

  Johnnie hardly listened to his father’s recrimination on the train journey back to London. He hated him for spoiling it all for him and Polly. What they’d had was so special, but his dad had made it seem dirty.

  He knew Polly would never see him again, yet there had been such an attraction between them from the beginning that had he told her the truth, he felt that it might have happened just the same. He had been unable to resist her, and he was sure she had felt the same about him.

  His dad said it was unnatural, but it hadn’t felt unnatural to him. He mused on it all the way to London, his thoughts spiralling, and as the train neared the city, Johnnie came to realise that his dad was probably right. That didn’t stop it hurting, though, and the thought of never seeing Polly again cut him to the core.

  God, he’d been such an idiot. Such a fool. Not only had he lost the best thing that had ever happened to him, he had also blown any chance of having a sister in his life.

  When Johnnie thought of Polly as his sister, he felt like filth and realised what a mess he had made of everything. A horrible, sordid mess.

  Chapter 32

  Katy’s court case came up at last. It was mid-August and she had been on remand for four months, but now she would find out what her future would be. Either she would soon be a free woman or she’d be facing many years locked up in prison. She had such conflicting emotions: part of her was excited and hopeful about the prospect of going home, but another, larger part was dreading the trial and the thought of imprisonment. At least the charge had been reduced from murder to voluntary manslaughter. She desperately hoped her defence of provocation would be believed and the judge and jury would be sympathetic and return a verdict of not guilty. They would be the best words she would ever hear.

  Katy was relieved when the officer removed her handcuffs. They were so uncomfortable and hurt her wrists, but it meant it was nearly time to leave the holding cell to be taken up to the court. Her heart was thumping in her chest as she was led up the small staircase to the courtroom. She could see that the viewing gallery above had already filled with lawyers, jurors and press.

  The room was ornately decorated with lots of gilt and highly varnished dark wood. She was placed at a table with an officer overseeing her, and two assistants from her lawyer’s office. She was very impressed with her barrister, who was wearing one of those funny white wigs and a dark gown. His opponent, though dressed the same, looked somehow more intimidating and Katy suddenly realised that spending her future locked up was a very real possibility.

  She looked behind her and saw a few familiar faces in the upper seating area. Her mum was there, waving profusely, alongside Ross, who looked as unhappy as ever, and Toby was there too. It gave her a warm feeling inside to see she had support in the room and she hoped that it wouldn’t be long before she could give her mum the biggest cuddle ever.

  ‘All rise,’ the court usher announced as a very stern-looking judge entered the court. Katy stood up but felt quite faint and rested her fingers on the table to steady herself. Fear gripped her and she did her best to fight back tears.

  The formalities were read aloud and then one person after another took it in turns to take the stand and swear the oath of promising to tell the truth. Soon she was feeling bruised and dazed as the prosecution attempted to slur her reputation, suggesting that she was a ‘good-time girl’ who drank profusely and was reckless, even intimating that she was a loose woman of questionable morals and standards. It didn’t bode well either when the landlord of the pub commented on how drunk she had been on the night in question and said she’d been seen openly flirting with several men.

  Katy felt sick inside, but then some very reliable character witnesses were called, including her boss, who fought hard to convince the jury that she was an honest, hard-working young woman who on occasion would innocently enjoy herself but had never shown any signs of violence. Also in her favour, the arresting officer openly apologised to her and spoke about the Purvis brothers with nothing but contempt.

  The court adjourned for lunch and Katy was taken back down to the holding cell, where she sat, still dazed, but knowing that the key part of the trial was to come. She would be called to give evidence and of course Polly would take the stand.

  Kate offered up a silent prayer to a God she wasn’t sure existed, but if He did she needed all the help she could get. Please Lord, she prayed inwardly, please, I’ve never asked you for anything before, but if you’re there, and if you can hear me, I just want to go home. You know I never meant to kill him, so please let them find me innocent.

  The thought of returning to the prison and being on B Wing with the most violent women in society absolutely petrified Katy and she wasn’t sure if she could survive in that sort of environment. Once again she turned her thoughts to God. If she was found guilty and sent back to prison, she decided there and then that she
would be meeting her Maker a long time before she was due to.

  There was absolute silence as Polly entered the courtroom and took the stand. The first thing Toby noticed was that her bleached blonde hair had been toned down and was now light brown, and she wasn’t wearing heavy make-up around her eyes – eyes that now looked like a rabbit’s caught in headlights. Polly was very different from the last time he’d seen her. She looked so fresh and pretty, and he wished he could take her away from all this. He knew that the horror of reliving what had happened would be very difficult for her, especially so publicly in a crowded courtroom.

  Toby’s heart went out to her as the judge ordered her to speak up when she placed her hand on the Bible, swearing to tell the truth. She was like a nervous little mouse whom he could just about hear.

  The defence were brilliant and Toby almost clapped and cheered when they had finished questioning Polly, but he was dreading the next part, knowing that the prosecution would rip her apart. But Toby realised that he needn’t have worried. Polly was doing so well. She held herself together and told the court clearly and articulately exactly what had happened without faltering, even when the prosecution attempted to trip her up with their clever questions. She remained calm, even though Toby felt she was being bullied – the way the prosecution behaved, you would think Polly was on trial, instead of a lovely young woman who had been brutally raped. Toby studied the jurors’ faces and was sure he could see that most of them looked sympathetic to her.

  Polly looked relieved when after nearly an hour of gruelling questioning she was finally able to leave the stand. Toby excused himself past the other onlookers and went through to the corridors to look for her. He found her sitting on a bench wiping her eyes.

  ‘Hello, Polly,’ he said.

  ‘Oh, hello, Toby. I’m sorry you found me bawling my eyes out, but I found that tougher than I thought it was going to be. I just hope I said all the right things to help Katy.’

  ‘You did brilliantly. I don’t think I would have been quite so calm and collected if it had been me up there. I think it’s going well and I can’t believe they’ll send Katy down.’

  ‘But what if they do?’

  ‘They won’t. No jury could possibly find Katy guilty, not after all they’ve heard, and remember Katy is to take the stand soon too.’

  ‘I’m not allowed to be in there, so will you go back and let me know how it’s all going, please?’

  ‘There’s no need. Jackie will keep us updated and in the meantime, after that experience, I think you need a strong coffee. Come on, let’s get some fresh air. There’s a café close by.’

  Toby was keen to know if Polly was still dating but didn’t quite have the courage to ask. If she was still seeing someone then he’d have to accept that, but if she wasn’t he didn’t intend to let her go so easily this time.

  Jackie spotted Polly and Toby walking along the marbled corridor and ran towards them as fast as her large frame would allow.

  ‘She’s been acquitted! She’s free! She’s coming home!’

  Polly and Toby stopped dead in their tracks and looked open-mouthed at Jackie, who was crying tears of relief.

  ‘Did you hear what I said? Katy is free!’ Jackie squealed again.

  ‘Yes, we heard you – and it’s wonderful.’

  ‘When Katy took the stand, the prosecution were hard on her, but her barrister was brilliant in her defence. He was so insistent that Katy was only trying to defend you, Polly, and that it was an accidental death. The jury went to deliberate and they were back in under half an hour. They found her not guilty and the judge said she’s free to go. She’s just talking to her solicitor and signing a few papers and then she’ll be here.’

  Polly threw her arms around Jackie. ‘Thank God it’s over, Jackie. I can’t believe it – Katy’s free.’

  It was a deeply emotional moment for both women and tears of joy were flowing freely. Toby gave Ross a quick hug before enthusiastically shaking his hand. ‘Nice one, your sister’s coming home and about time too.’

  Security guards gathered at the entrance of the courthouse and the press were there too, but Jackie ignored their shouts. She wouldn’t talk to them. All she wanted was to hold her daughter in her arms and take her home to where she belonged.

  ‘Here she is,’ Toby announced as Katy walked towards them with a huge smile on her face.

  ‘Come here, darling,’ said Jackie as she reached for Katy, ‘let’s get you home and put this whole affair behind us. Well done, love, I knew you could do it.’

  ‘Yes, home,’ Katy said. ‘That sounds good to me. I hope you’re coming too, Polly?’

  ‘Yes. I didn’t think the trial would be over this quickly so I arranged with your mum to stay over.’

  ‘Come on, let’s get out of here before those reporters start hounding us,’ Jackie said, and together they all made a dash for it.

  Polly was glad to be back with her best friend and she loved being amidst the family atmosphere even though Ross was being his usual sulky self. It helped her to push thoughts of Johnnie to one side, but she knew as soon as she went to bed and closed her eyes, what had happened would all come flooding back.

  Katy was pleased to be home, but a little subdued. After what she’d been through it wasn’t surprising, but Jackie seemed determined to cheer her daughter up. Despite the hot weather, she cooked them a meal and brought out a bottle of Blue Nun wine, saying as they sat down to eat, ‘We’re having a drink to celebrate.’

  Polly found she liked the taste of the white wine, and when the bottle was emptied she was surprised when Jackie got out another one.

  ‘It’s been in the sideboard for ages,’ Jackie explained, ‘and I’d all but forgotten about it.’

  ‘Mum, mind it doesn’t go to your head,’ Katy warned.

  ‘It’s nice to see that you’ve perked up, love, and don’t worry. I know I’m not one for drinking so I’ll only have the one glass.’

  Polly was enjoying the meal and the wine. After several glasses, she could feel it going to her head, and was beginning to feel a bit dizzy when Katy said, ‘I’m glad you’re staying, Polly, but won’t your boyfriend miss you?’

  ‘We … we broke up. It didn’t work out,’ she blurted and then to avoid any more questions she stood up. ‘I feel a bit woozy so I’m just going outside for a bit of air.’

  ‘I’ll come with you,’ Katy offered.

  ‘No, no, you stay there. I won’t be long,’ she insisted, but no sooner had she gone outside than Toby was standing next to her.

  ‘I thought I’d join you. I could do with a bit of air too. I’m sorry to hear that you broke up with your boyfriend. What went wrong?’

  ‘I–I don’t want to talk about it.’

  ‘I hope he didn’t hurt you, Polly.’

  Yes, she thought. Johnnie had hurt her. It disgusted her that she had slept with her own brother, sickened her, and when left alone to brood the need to confide in someone was strong. Maybe the wine had loosened her tongue too because she found herself blurting it all out.

  ‘I don’t know what to say, Polly,’ said Toby, looking shocked.

  ‘I know, it’s revolting and I can’t believe that he did that to me. I’ll never forgive him. Never!’

  ‘He doesn’t deserve forgiveness.’

  ‘I’m still shocked that my mum had a whole other life that I knew nothing about. I might have other relatives, people I know nothing about, even grandparents. When I go home I’m going to see if I can find anything, papers or photographs. If there were any she might have hidden them, probably in the loft, but I’m not looking forward to going up there.’

  ‘If you like, I’ll help you. I could come down one weekend and we could do it together,’ Toby offered.

  Polly wasn’t sure if it was the wine going to her head or the thought of Toby visiting her for the weekend, but she felt strangely lost in his dark eyes. ‘Yes … yes, all right.’

  ‘Next weekend then, it’s a date,’ he
said, but then frowned. ‘On reflection, there might be a bit of a problem with that.’

  ‘Don’t worry then, Toby. I don’t want to put you out,’ she said, slightly disappointed.

  ‘No, it’s not putting me out or anything. To be honest, I’ve had a few problems of my own lately and things are a bit hard. Truth is, I’ve had to shut the business, close the shop down, and as of next week I’ll be officially homeless.’

  ‘Oh, Toby, I’m really sorry to hear that. What happened? I thought with your own business you were doing well.’

  ‘The bloody Purvises – they were blackmailing me for money, more money than I could afford to pay, so I ended up taking out a loan, then another, then I got behind with the payments and my rent. It’s a slippery slope, Polly, and once the debts start, they just spiral out of control. Now I’ve lost everything, only please don’t say anything to Jackie or anyone else, especially tonight.’

  ‘But what will you do? Where will you live?’

  ‘I’m not sure. The only thing I can think of is to move in with my mother and her sister. They live in the north of the country and haven’t much room, so it isn’t ideal. Still, a sofa is better than nothing.’

  ‘I’m sure Jackie would take you in.’

  ‘Yes, I’m sure she would, but until I find my feet I can’t give her any money and I refuse to impose on her.’

  Polly reacted quickly without thinking it through. ‘You could come and stay with me. I’ve got plenty of room and, to be honest, I could do with the company. I’m sure you’ll be able to find work locally, but until you do you can pay your way by doing some things around the house, maintenance, things that need repairing but are beyond me.’

  Toby’s eyes lit up and he immediately accepted her offer, but Polly was already regretting her impulsiveness. She had already had one man staying in her house – one who had broken her heart. She couldn’t take her offer back, but she could lay some ground rules. ‘Toby, there’s one thing, though – something we need to be clear on from the start. We’re just friends, and I don’t want more than that.’