The Agent's Surrender

by Kimberly Van Meter

  “Do you think at some point he realized he was in over his head?”

  “Definitely. And Miko was never one to ask for help. He was always the one lending a hand. When it came to accepting help for himself, forget about it.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know. I could guess it probably had something to do with the way we were raised. Our dad was a bit of a prick—certainly not a contender for Father of the Year. Some of those lessons stuck with us like dog crap on our shoe. I guess Miko thought he would look weak if he admitted he was in over his head. Maybe he heard our dad’s voice berating him for being pathetic.”

  She fought the urge to grasp Holden’s hand in a show of solidarity. Instead, she folded her hands in her lap in a deliberate motion but confessed, “I know what it’s like to live with an overbearing father.” She was surprised the words fell from her mouth so easily. Nobody talked badly about The Major. He was highly respected, highly decorated—the kind of man that you wanted walking the line at Guantanamo Bay but not necessarily the man you wanted helping with your homework. “My dad used to say that sweat and tears were just weakness leaving the body. But while sweat was allowed, tears were not. It was a tough way to grow up.”

  “I’d heard stories about your father. When he was on active duty, he had the ability to make or break careers. Based on what I know of him, he doesn’t seem the kind of man who read his kids bedtime stories.”

  She laughed derisively. “Au contraire. My father loved reading World War II historical documents to us. He said it was good for the mind to learn from the mistakes of the past. My father was a big fan of military strategy.”

  “Historical documents...sounds kind of dry. That would put me right to sleep.”

  “Oh, you weren’t allowed to sleep. Are you kidding? If The Major saw you nodding off, you had to do twenty push-ups.”

  “Damn, that’s rough.” He cast her a sideways glance. “Let me guess, you fell asleep fairly often....”

  She frowned. “Why? Because I’m a girl? Why would you say that?”

  He chuckled at her defensiveness. “Calm down, she-cat. I was just saying you’re in pretty good shape and have been since I’ve known you, so you must’ve been accustomed to doing push-ups fairly regularly.”

  She blushed. Why did she have to jump to the wrong conclusion? Had he just given her a compliment? Yep. And she’d overreacted. “Sorry. I’m a little sensitive about certain things. It’s hard growing up the only girl surrounded by military men.”

  “What happened to your mom?”

  “She left when I was eleven. I guess she got tired of being a military wife.”

  “That’s rough. Do you see her at all?”

  She barked a disgusted laugh. “I don’t tend to chase after people who leave me behind. It was her loss and her choice.”

  “True, but I could hazard a guess that your dad’s not an easy man to live with. You never had the chance to ask her why she left?”

  Jane pinned him with a hard look. “I don’t care why. She’s a quitter, and I don’t have time to figure out why she bailed. And frankly, I don’t need her in my life. I’m a grown woman and past the point of needing a mother to guide me through life.”

  Holden dropped it, clearly sensing they were skirting a sensitive issue. Jane took a deep breath, hating she couldn’t talk about her mother without getting snippy. Once, she’d seen a therapist to see if she could work out her issues. The first visit had ended badly when the therapist had suggested Jane reconnect with her mother as part of the healing process. Like that was going to happen. “Listen, I didn’t mean to snap at you. I just get hot under the collar when people keep suggesting I talk to my mother. She’s the one who left, not me. As far as I’m concerned, she made her bed, and she can lie in it all by her lonesome.”

  “So you don’t know if she remarried?”

  “Actually, I do know that she remarried. Not that I care. It’s her life. She’s welcome to it. How did we get stuck on the subject of my mother? I thought we were talking about Miko.”

  Holden spread his fingers in a conciliatory manner. “Just trying to get to know my partner. And so far I know that she does not like talking about her mother.”

  Jane smiled. “Very astute. Your investigative skills are top-notch. Now, back to Miko. You say that justice was an important theme in his life. Maybe Miko was working undercover, trying to get enough evidence to take down I.D.”

  “That would make more sense than my brother just shooting himself because of a guilty conscience. I can also see him taking his own life if he thought it would protect mine. Maybe someone threatened my life and Miko did what he had to do to protect me.”

  “But why would someone threaten your life? You haven’t had anything to do with Tessara Pharm, right?”

  “No, but someone might’ve known Miko well enough to know that he’d do anything for me. Pulling strings with that kind of leverage would’ve been easy.”

  Jane let the information sink in for a minute. In her mind, she saw two brothers, linked by blood and soul. She wished she had that kind of connection with another human being. Growing up, her brothers had been protective, but they’d been too consumed with following in The Major’s footsteps, both in career and mindset, to truly let her into their circle. Somehow, as a woman, she’d always been made to feel second best when it came to the men in her family. Had her mother felt that way, too? “You’re lucky to have someone who loved you that much,” she murmured, the sentiment slipping out before she could stop it. She caught Holden’s questioning gaze and she shook her head. Leave it. “Forget I said that. I’m just tired.”

  To his credit, Holden didn’t pry, although she saw the questions behind his eyes, and when she decided she’d try for that nap after all, he let her. Her last thought before falling into a fitful sleep was that if she wasn’t careful, she’d end up seeing Holden as more than just another uniform...and that wouldn’t do at all.

  Chapter 9

  Holden and Jane arrived at Nathan and Jaci’s place around 10:00 p.m., and though Holden was sore from sitting in a plane for eight hours and it was really 1:00 a.m. in D.C., he was happy to see Nathan again after so much time. Technically, Nathan had been Miko’s buddy, but Holden also considered Nathan his friend. He caught Nathan in a manly hug and clapped him on the back in a solid greeting, “Hey, ugly! The last time I saw you, you were leading us into certain death. Good times. Everything good?”

  Nathan grinned. “After surviving multiple attempts on my life, rescuing my brother from a government compound and pretty much kissing away any semblance of a normal life...yeah, life is pretty good.” As his gaze flicked to Jane, he said, “And you must be the investigating agent, Jane Fallon. I’d like to say it’s a pleasure, but the circumstances suck.”

  “No offense taken,” Jane said. “I wish we were meeting socially rather than officially. You seem like a decent guy.”

  “Don’t let my rugged good looks fool you—I’m as bad as they come,” Nathan said with a completely straight face, but Holden wasn’t so restrained, and guffawed. Nathan turned to punch Holden in the arm. “Hey! Stop ruining my street cred. I’ve got a reputation to uphold.”

  “I didn’t know you had a flair for fiction,” Holden said. “Maybe you missed your calling.” He gestured to the house. “Are we going to freeze our asses off outside or go inside for a beer?”

  “Depends. Are you housebroken?” Nathan asked. “The last time I invited you over for a beer, you pissed in my plant.”

  Holden looked to Jane, who wore a faintly bemused expression. “Nathan loves to tell that story, but he fails to share that we were both drunk off our asses that night, and how was I supposed to tell a giant potted plant from the latrine? It was years ago in another country, I might add.”

  “You peed in a plant?”

  “He killed it, too,” Nathan supplied with mock seriousness. “You know, Holden, you might consider drinking more water. Your piss was so concentrated it came
out as a solid.”

  “Shut up,” Holden said, and pushed the joker as he laughed.

  “All right, come on in. Jaci thought you guys would be hungry, so she kept the spaghetti warm.”

  “Home-cooked meal,” Holden said, grinning from ear to ear. “Now, that’s some hospitality.”

  “You’d better wait until you taste the spaghetti before you start throwing out thank-yous,” Nathan warned in a conspiratorial whisper. “Jaci is on this gluten-free kick. The noodles are a bit chewy.”

  “Can’t be any worse than an MRE,” Jane said, smiling.

  “You would think, huh?” Nathan countered as they walked inside, but the moment they entered the living room, his smiled widened with pure love at the sight of Jaci. Holden felt a pang of envy for what his friend had. Jaci had changed Nathan—in a good way—and it was something to see in action. Holden loved the ladies, but the idea of being tied down permanently caused sweat to break out on his forehead.

  His gaze swung to Jane, and his heartbeat kicked up a notch for no good reason. Sure, she was hot—he’d have to be blind to miss her perfectly sculpted body honed by hours of gym time—but Jane wasn’t a good time...in any sense of the word. Before he and Jane had hooked up, he’d always preferred his women pliable and a little dumb. That had all changed after Jane. She made him realize that smart women were more exciting, more challenging and definitely sexier than the vapid types he’d been sharing time with. He’d quickly discovered that Jane was probably smarter than he was, and she’d kept him on his toes with her sharp mind. Even though there was no downtime with her and it was exhausting, Jane was freaking hot as hell and nothing would ever change that fact.

  “Holden, it’s so good to see you,” Jaci said as he folded her into a hug. She was the prettiest redhead he’d ever seen. Nathan certainly had good taste. She pulled away and extended her hand to Jane with a welcoming smile. “And you must be Jane. I’m Jaci. Very nice to meet you.”

  “Likewise. You have a lovely home,” Jane supplied with polite interest. “Thank you for agreeing to let us stay while we’re in town. Your hospitality is much appreciated.”

  “I’d like to say she’s not always this stiff, but I’d be lying. Jane lives and breathes by the regs,” Holden teased, and enjoyed the flush of heat in Jane’s cheeks. He liked ruffling her feathers, which was probably a bad idea, but it was strangely addicting to watch her loosen up. It made him remember what she was like in bed. He suffered a mental groan as he pushed the image out of his head. “I heard there’s spaghetti?” He sniffed the air and rubbed his stomach. “Even in first class, the food isn’t much to write home about.”

  “Oh! I’m so glad you’re hungry,” Jaci said, leading them to the kitchen. “You’ll have to tell me what you think of this new recipe I’m trying. Did you know gluten is like poison to our systems? I’m learning all about what gluten does to the body, and it’s fascinating.”

  “As long as it tastes good, I don’t care what it’s made from.” He flashed a grin at Jane.

  Everyone took a seat at the oak table while Jaci bustled around getting plates ready. Within minutes, they were digging in. At first bite, Holden didn’t notice anything different and tucked into a few more healthy bites, but after a few mouthfuls, he started to notice the texture and chewed more slowly. “Definitely filling,” he said around a hot bite, giving a thumbs-up to Jaci, who beamed before slapping Nathan lightly on the shoulder.

  “See? I told you, it’s only you who notices the difference. If you’d stop being so picky, you’d forget all about the fact the noodles are made from squash.”

  Squash? Holden choked down the last bite. He hated squash. But like Jane said, if he could choke down an MRE, he could eat anything. Holden cleaned his plate and Jane did a serviceable job choking down her portion, too, but he could tell she wasn’t loving it. Jane would never be so rude as to admit she didn’t like it, and Holden had to give her props for being a good sport. He’d have to take her out for some fancy coffee drink tomorrow morning, his treat. All too soon, the conversation turned serious, but he supposed there was no getting around that because it was the whole reason they’d come to California.

  “So tell me what’s really going on,” Nathan said, playing with the wrapper on his beer. “I know you’re not here for social reasons.”

  “I told you I thought Miko was being pushed by someone else. Someone compelled him to end his life, and I aim to find out who.”

  Nathan lost his easy smile. Talking about Miko was hard for them all, but more so for Nathan because he had been there when Miko ate a bullet. “Look, more than anyone I want to believe Miko wasn’t the sniper who took out Tom and all those innocent people, but I just don’t see who else could be pulling the strings to make that happen. Penny is dead. She was the head of the monster—I.D.—and it’s over.”

  “It’s not over,” Holden disagreed with an adamant shake of his head. “Think about it, Nathan. Was Miko the kind of man who killed innocent people? He was Captain America, for crying out loud.”

  “We didn’t know they were innocent,” Nathan said, trying to get Holden to understand. “We thought we were doing a service to our country. We had no idea that Penny was the one calling the shots and running I.D. as her own personal hit squad. It’s not Miko’s fault. We were both duped.”

  “What if Miko was working undercover to expose the true head of the beast?” Holden supplied, leaning forward. “Tell me if this sounds odd.... Ulysses Rocha, an executive at Tessara Pharm, came to my boss to inquire about the status of Miko’s case mere days after Chief Harris had given us a soft okay to reopen it on a temporary basis. How the hell did Rocha even know the case had been reopened?”

  “I don’t know,” Nathan admitted, looking troubled. “Did he say anything else?”

  “Just that he was there to protect the shareholders’ interests and suggested the case remain shut for the greater good.”

  “Only someone with something to hide would balk at the case reopening, particularly if they thought they were in the clear.”

  Jaci, who’d unfortunately also been present at the time of Miko’s death, spoke up. “Holden, even if you’re right, what good will come of this? What if the beast you’re so keen on exposing is bigger than you can possibly handle? Maybe Miko realized this and that’s why he took his life.”

  “Maybe, but that’s not who Miko was. He never backed down from a fight. Even when he should’ve.”

  “You didn’t see him that day,” Jaci said gently. “He couldn’t hide the pain in his eyes. He was eaten with guilt. Whatever his role was, he’d reached the end of his rope and checked out.”

  “We found three passports, cash and IDs in a hidden location in his bar,” Jane jumped in, surprising Holden. The firm set of her mouth and tilt of her chin suggested she believed Holden was right. Something shifted inside of him, aligning in a new position. He thanked her silently and Jane gave an imperceptible nod before continuing in a strong, clear voice, “We think there may be a bigger connection to Tessara than previously believed. Why else would a bigwig fly all the way to Washington for a sit-down with our chief if not to send home the message that people are watching?”

  “That’s a good point,” Nathan allowed, a dark scowl forming on his brow. “Damn that place. They ought to burn it to the ground.”

  Knowing Nathan’s animosity toward Tessara was centered on his brother Jake’s situation, Holden asked, “Jake getting better?”

  “Yeah, he’s about eighty percent right now. Kat seems to think he’ll make a full recovery eventually, but it’s hard watching him struggle with his memory. Personally, I question the decision to keep MCX-209 in cold storage when it should’ve been destroyed. That drug is a threat to everyone on this planet.”

  Holden agreed. At Jane’s questioning look, Holden explained quickly, “Jake was given a dose of an experimental drug created in a Tessara lab called MCX-209. It was supposed to cure Alzheimer’s, but instead it wipes out memories. In
earlier trials of the drug, it pretty much reduced the test subject to a drooling mess, or worse, dead with their brains leaking from their ears.” Jane grimaced and Holden continued. “Yeah, pretty nasty stuff. The worst part is Jake’s girlfriend, Dr. Kat Odgers, actually created the drug and was the one forced by a rogue faction within a government branch to administer it to him. So, understandably, no one at this table has fond feelings toward Tessara.”

  The color drained from Jane’s face. “Why wasn’t it destroyed? A drug like that...it’s too dangerous for anyone to have.”

  “Because it’s quite possibly the most innovative weapon ever created to date, and of course, our government felt it necessary to control it.”

  “That doesn’t fill me with confidence.” She shuddered a little. “Sounds like something out of a movie—and not a feel-good movie.”

  “Agreed,” Holden said. “Back to Miko... Listen, Nathan, Jaci, it’s late and we’re tired. Tomorrow we’re going to drop by Tessara and poke around, but in the meantime, I want you guys to search your memories and see if there’s anything else you can remember about that day. Miko was stashing money and IDs for a reason. We just have to find out what it was.”

  They nodded, although both didn’t look happy about the idea of revisiting Miko’s death, not that Holden blamed them. If he’d seen his brother kill himself, he might still be in a padded cell. “Thanks. I appreciate your help.”

  “Anything for Miko,” Nathan said. “I don’t care what they say—he was a good man.”

  Holden blinked back tears for his friend’s solidarity. No more words were needed.

  Time to put a pin in this night. Tomorrow would be here in a blink.

  Chapter 10

  They arrived at Tessara around noon and walked into the smart building with its gleaming glass and stately metal accents.