A Ring for the Pregnant Debutante

by Laura Martin

  ‘After his brother died I told him to travel,’ Sarah said quietly. ‘I saw the fear and the sadness in his eyes and knew he needed something else to focus on, something positive. And I wanted him to have something to remember, something to be proud of, if he did develop the disease.’ She stared out into the distance for a few minutes in silence. ‘But he’s too focused on gaining those new experiences to realise exactly what it is that would make him happy now.’

  Rosa felt tears threaten to spill on to her cheeks.

  ‘He could be so happy being a husband and a father, if he just let himself,’ Sarah said. Taking Rosa’s hand, she patted it softly. ‘I’m sure he’ll come round with time, realise what he would be giving up if he left.’

  Rosa watched as Thomas re-emerged over the brow of the hill, allowing his horse to trot happily back towards them. Maybe he would realise how perfect the life they could have together would be, but she wasn’t sure. He was so determined, so stubborn, that she knew once he’d set his mind to a particular course of action not much could sway him away from it.

  ‘Well whatever happens I am thrilled to have you here with me. And I never expected to be a grandmother. I feel doubly blessed.’

  Rosa cleared her throat, knowing she had to confess the child was not Thomas’s. She couldn’t bear to deceive the kindly older woman any longer.

  ‘I’m not sure how much Thomas has told you about how we met and the circumstances of my being in Italy,’ Rosa began nervously.

  Sarah looked at her with interest. Rosa felt her mouth go dry and stuttered the next few words. The older woman held up a hand to stop her.

  ‘If you are trying to tell me this child is not of Thomas’s blood, I am well aware of that fact,’ Sarah said, squeezing Rosa’s hand. ‘Thomas told me far from everything, but I could fill in the gaps with educated guesses.’

  Holding her breath, Rosa waited for her mother-in-law’s reaction.

  ‘In a way I’m glad,’ Sarah said with a small smile. ‘Thomas would never risk passing on the disease to the next generation of Hunters and I have to respect his decision. But this way he gets an heir without having to spend his life worrying about what future the child might have to endure because of his cursed blood.’

  ‘That’s exactly what Thomas said.’

  ‘And of course I get a grandchild. I do love children.’

  Rosa could tell from the warmth in Sarah’s voice that she would shower this child with love and affection, even though it was not her flesh and blood.

  ‘You two look awfully serious,’ Thomas said as he reined in his horse and swung down from its back.

  ‘We’re discussing you,’ his mother said with a smile.

  ‘Surely I don’t have so many flaws to warrant such concerned expressions.’

  Both Rosa and Sarah remained silent for a few moments and then burst out laughing.

  * * *

  ‘May I deprive you of Rosa’s company for a while?’ Thomas asked his mother, holding his hand out to Rosa and helping her from the bench.

  He loved watching her move, loved seeing the slow, careful way she manoeuvred herself into a standing position, how she had to steady herself for a few seconds to find her balance and the slight waddle to her gait as she walked.

  ‘Of course. You two go and enjoy yourselves.’

  Slowing his pace so Rosa didn’t become overtired, Thomas led her away from the house across the lawn.

  ‘Where are we going?’

  ‘Have a little patience and you will see. It’s somewhere new. Somewhere secret.’

  ‘Thomas, I’ve strolled through all the gardens ten times over this past month. I think I would have noticed somewhere secret.’

  ‘That’s the beauty of a secret place, you can walk past ten times without even noticing it’s there. You need someone to show you the way.’

  ‘I told your mother about the baby,’ Rosa said, her eyes fixed to the ground.

  He knew she felt awkward discussing the child, awkward talking of the baby from another man she was carrying.

  ‘What did she say?’

  ‘She had guessed that you were not...’ Rosa trailed off. Even though the child was not of his blood he would still be its father.

  Thomas stopped abruptly and turned to face Rosa. He saw the worry in her eyes and the little pucker between her eyebrows.

  ‘Rosa, I know this child is not of my flesh and blood, and until it is born I suspect I won’t truly know how I feel about him or her. But I can promise you I will nurture and cherish this baby as if it were my own.’

  He saw the flicker of hope in Rosa’s eyes and knew it was the right thing to say, even if he wasn’t sure it was the truth. If he was completely honest he had mixed feelings about this child that was about to burst into their lives. He wanted to love the little boy or girl Rosa was carrying, and he thought he might do so already, but he just wasn’t sure. Could a man love another man’s child as he would his own? Thomas didn’t know the answer to that and he rather suspected he wouldn’t know until he looked down into the child’s eyes and held the little bundle in his arms.

  Not that Rosa needed to know all of that. She had enough to worry about with the impending arrival, she didn’t need to dwell on whether her husband would love her baby.

  ‘I know it is an impossible situation.’

  ‘I was well aware of your condition and the consequences of that when I married you,’ Thomas said with a smile.

  ‘But then you were planning on bringing me back to England and then bidding me farewell.’

  Thomas felt his whole body stiffen. These last few weeks had been marvellous. He’d been cocooned in happiness, surrounded by love and joy, but he knew it had to come to an end. He thought Rosa had known that, too.

  ‘Rosa, I want to be here when you give birth,’ Thomas said slowly. ‘And of course for a few weeks afterwards.’

  He watched as she tried to hide the pain as she understood the true meaning of his words. He was still going to leave her, still planning on abandoning her in his country estate whilst he went to travel the world.

  ‘I wish to see you settled with the baby, of course.’

  ‘But then you will leave.’ Rosa’s voice was completely flat and devoid of emotion, but her eyes betrayed the true pain she was feeling.

  ‘That was always the plan,’ Thomas said.

  He’d never deceived her, never lied to her and told her he would stay, but he’d seen the hope blossoming in her as they’d grown closer these last few weeks. Every time he slipped into bed beside her Thomas had known it would make the eventual farewell so much harder, but he just hadn’t been able to keep away.

  ‘I know. You will return to travelling the world and I shall be a companion to your mother.’

  ‘Do you not get on well with my mother?’

  ‘That’s not the point,’ Rosa said, her voice low and overflowing with emotion.

  He went to reach out and touch her arm, but Rosa pulled away.

  ‘I can’t stay here, Rosa.’

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘You know why.’

  ‘Tell me again. Make me understand.’

  ‘Come with me.’ Thomas didn’t try to touch her again and was acutely aware of the space between them as reluctantly she followed him. He led her through the formal gardens and off to one side, out into a wooded area. They walked for about ten minutes in silence before Thomas stopped and motioned to the monument in front of them.

  It was his brother’s grave. Situated in a clearing in the woodland his brother had loved so much as a child, the grave was neat and lovingly tended.

  ‘I wanted to show you this. I come here to talk to my brother sometimes. To ask his advice.’

  Rosa carefully knelt in front of the grave and bent her head for a
few moments. Thomas could see her lips moving, but didn’t recognise the words.

  ‘I understand you lost two people very dear to you,’ Rosa said softly. ‘And I understand you live in fear of one day succumbing to the same disease. What I don’t understand is why you feel you must push everyone away and face this on your own.’

  Thomas stepped forward and placed a hand on the smooth headstone, running his fingers over the inscription.

  ‘I saw the pain my mother had to live through every single day watching my father lose first his physical abilities and then his mental. By the end there wasn’t even a trace of the man she had married left.’

  ‘She must have been devastated by the loss,’ Rosa said. ‘But I know she was glad to be there for your father through those years of decline. To share the good days along with the bad.’

  ‘I don’t ever want to be a burden like that.’

  Rosa stepped towards him and cupped his face in her hands. Thomas felt her soft skin against his rough stubble.

  ‘If you love someone it isn’t a burden. It’s just what you do.’

  Thomas looked into her eyes and saw the raw emotion and felt his throat begin to constrict. He knew she cared for him, had known it ever since they’d travelled across Italy together, but now he could see pure love in her eyes.

  Before he could answer, before he could even begin to formulate a single word, Rosa dropped her hands and turned away. Without looking behind her she walked back through the trees and into the garden and Thomas wondered if he’d lost her for good.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Dear Caroline,

  I must apologise for leaving it so long in between my letters. So much has happened since I last penned you that short note from Venice, letting you know of my pending marriage.

  We are now back in England and have been for some weeks, but much of that time I have been recuperating from a shipwreck on our voyage home. It was terrible, Caroline. I’ve never experienced such fear. Not for myself, as you must understand better than many, but for my child.

  The doctor is as confident as he can be that the baby sustained no injury or damage during my time in the water, but I find myself fretting still. The only thing that can reassure me is feeling my little baby’s determined kicks and somersaults inside me.

  I am now residing at Longcroft Hall, my husband’s family home in Hampshire. At present there is me, my husband and his mother in residence, but I fear that soon Thomas might leave England again and set off on his travels around the world. He is determined to go, even though I know he is happy here with me.

  The situation is perhaps too complicated to go into in a letter, but suffice it to say Thomas thinks he would be protecting me in the long term if he left now. What he does not seem to understand is that my heart will break if he leaves me. Every day I hope he might change his mind, and when I catch him looking at the child growing inside me I can see him waver.

  Is it completely pathetic that I don’t care if it is me he stays for or the baby? As long as he stays close.

  Enough about my woes. I know I am very lucky to have a safe and stable home and a legal father for my child.

  Caroline, I yearn for news of you and your darling son. It will not be long before I give birth myself, but I wish I could see you and confide all of my hopes and fears. You always did have a level head and a way of making everything work out for the best.

  You are most welcome to come and visit here at Longcroft Hall, or once I am recovered from childbirth I could make the trip to you.

  With all my love,

  Rosa

  Rosa waited for the ink to dry and then folded the sheet of paper in half, slipping it into an envelope and penning the address on the front. She wished dearly for her old friend, Caroline always knew what to do in a difficult situation and Rosa wanted someone she could tell about every aspect of her life, good and bad.

  Rosa looked up as the door opened and Thomas strolled inside.

  ‘I’ve received a note,’ he said and, although his voice was light and untroubled, Rosa could see the concern on his face.

  ‘Who from?’

  He cleared his throat. ‘Your father.’

  ‘Papa?’

  Rosa stood a little too quickly, had to hold out her arms to try to catch her balance and then gave up and fell back on to the sofa.

  ‘It seems he arrived in the village yesterday evening and is currently staying in the inn.’

  Rosa felt her heart leap and then sink again immediately.

  ‘And my mother?’ she asked.

  ‘He doesn’t mention her in his note.’

  Rosa had a flashback to the hatred and disgust on her mother’s face when she had sent her on her way to Italy.

  ‘Your father has asked if he may call on us, at our convenience.’

  Hope and doubt mingled in Rosa’s mind. She wanted to see her kind, gentle father so much, but she didn’t think she could stomach the upset of listening to her mother rant and rave. She felt Thomas’s eyes on her, watching her closely.

  ‘I was planning on taking my horse out for a ride this afternoon,’ he said slowly. ‘Perhaps I could travel to the village and see whether he came alone. If he has, then I will extend an invitation to dinner tonight.’

  ‘Thank you,’ Rosa said softly. He always seemed to know exactly what she needed, sometimes even before she knew it herself. Except when it came to his plans to abandon her in England, of course.

  ‘Our child should know at least one more grandparent,’ Thomas said, taking her hand and placing a kiss on her wrist.

  Rosa glanced surreptitiously at his face, wondering if he’d realise what he had just said. Our child. Up until this moment Thomas had always referred to the baby growing inside her as her child. She wondered if it was just a slip of the tongue or if he was coming to think of the baby as theirs.

  Stepping closer, Thomas tilted her face up and kissed her gently on the lips. These last couple of days he’d started being more careful as he touched and kissed her. The caresses were no less in number, but it was as though he was subconsciously aware that soon Rosa would be going through a great ordeal and wanted her to save her strength for that.

  She looped her arms up around his neck and pulled him closer to her, giggling as he brushed against her bump. Hearing him whisper her name as he peppered kisses along her jawbone and down her neck made her shudder with delight and Rosa allowed herself to be swept away by the moment.

  They were both all too aware that soon they would not be able to share the ultimate act of intimacy, but Rosa was keen to persuade Thomas that they could still have a close and physically loving relationship without risking her getting pregnant with his child.

  Running her hands down his body, she grazed her fingers over the toned muscles of his chest and abdomen, smiling as he let out a faint moan as she tucked a finger into his waistband.

  ‘You don’t know what you do to me, Rosa,’ Thomas whispered.

  Deftly she unbuttoned his trousers and sunk to her knees in front of him. She felt his eyes on her, watching with a mixture of disbelief and pleasure as she took him into her mouth. Slowly she began to move backwards and forward, watching his reaction to every flick of her tongue or stroke of her hand. Soon she knew exactly what made him groan in pleasure and what made him clutch at her shoulders in delight.

  Rosa looked up at him, saw him looking lovingly down at her, his eyes a little glazed as he stiffened and climaxed.

  Dropping lower, Rosa watched as Thomas recovered, stroking her hair and cupping her face until he was composed enough to help her to her feet.

  ‘Where on earth did you learn that?’ he asked.

  Rosa blushed. It had been a very awkward but very enlightening conversation with one of the housemaids. A couple of days ago Rosa had decided
she would fight for Thomas. She loved him, that much she knew, and she wasn’t going to let him leave without doing her utmost to persuade him to stay. That included showing him the sort of relationship they could have over the coming years.

  ‘We women discuss these things all the time,’ she said, hiding a smile as he looked momentarily alarmed. It wasn’t often she was able to ruffle her husband and she appreciated her small victory even if it was short lived.

  ‘We men talk, too,’ Thomas said, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

  For a second Rosa didn’t grasp his meaning, but gentle hands guiding her to the armchair were enough to make her eyes widen.

  ‘Men can’t do that to women,’ she said, feeling foolish as soon as the words left her mouth. Patricia the housemaid hadn’t told her anything about this.

  ‘Oh, yes, we can.’

  Deftly Thomas lifted Rosa’s skirts and she felt his hand on her thighs. He caressed the smooth skin for a second before grasping hold of the top of one stocking and rolling it down. Quickly he repeated the movement on the other leg. Even though her dress was still covering most of her upper legs she felt exposed and a thrill of excitement ran through her.

  ‘Anyone could come in.’

  ‘Then they should know better than to disturb a man alone with his wife.’

  Rosa felt any further protestations die on her lips as he kissed one ankle, moving up her leg ever so slowly, making her enjoy every caress.

  Rosa gasped as his lips reached the very top of her thigh and then let out a disappointed sigh as he pulled away and returned to the bottom of her other leg.

  ‘Patience, my dear,’ he said with a wicked grin.

  Trailing his lips up her leg, he paused again at her thighs and for one frustrating second Rosa thought he would pull away again, but then his mouth was on her and Rosa groaned in pleasure.

  Letting her head drop backwards, she closed her eyes as he kissed and caressed her, his touch making her want to scream in delight. Clutching at Thomas’s hair, Rosa felt her hips buck up to meet him again and again until something exploded inside her.

  It was a full two minutes before she felt ready to open her eyes and look up at her husband, who was now standing over her looking very pleased with himself.