“Just some stuff that’s been on my mind. Could you meet me at the Coffee Stop?”
“Sure. What time?”
“How about in half an hour?”
“I’ll be there,” he promised. “It’ll be good to see you again, Michelle. I’ve missed you.”
“Okay, well, I’ll see you there.”
Michelle’s hand was visibly shaking as she hung up the phone. What is the matter with me? I’ve got to get a grip before I see him. She looked over at the coffee table and saw her Bible lying open. She picked it up and read the verse she had highlighted earlier that morning in the book of Joshua.
“Have I not commanded you, be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord, your God, will be with you wherever you go.”
She closed her eyes and prayed. Please help me, Lord. I know I need to do this. In the quiet moment following her prayer, she felt her nervousness melt and a thought entered her mind that seemed to be God’s answer. I will help you, Michelle. I will go before you.
She soaked in the words and rested back into the soft cushions of the couch. Thank you, Lord.
Trevor looked particularly handsome as he sauntered into the Coffee Stop. Michelle noticed a couple of the young waitresses whisper to each other, checking him out from a distance.
“Hey there,” he said with his disarming smile as he slid into the seat across from her. “You look great.”
Michelle could feel the color rushing into her cheeks. Stop it, she silently chided herself. “Hi, Trevor. Thanks for coming to meet me.”
“My pleasure.” He winked at her as one of the waitresses approached their table. “What are you having? It’s my treat.”
“Just coffee,” she replied.
“Coffee sounds great. Me, too.” The waitress nodded and took off. “So what’s up?” he asked nonchalantly.
“I’m not quite sure how to say this, but...”
“We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” he said jokingly.
“Well, actually, yes.”
“Okay...so what does that mean?”
“It means we’ve got to cool our ‘friendship’.”
“And why is that? Steve getting a little jealous?” His voice had an edge to it.
“This wasn’t Steve’s idea. It was mine.” She stared down into the steaming coffee in her cup.
“What are you afraid of, Michelle?”
“Who says I’m afraid?” she replied, feeling her defenses rising.
“I think I know fear when I see it,” he said, taking a sip of coffee and studying her face.
This just unnerved Michelle more. “Stop staring at me.”
“I’m not staring at you. I’m just wondering what’s really behind this.”
“Trevor, you know that I’m married.” She suddenly felt her confidence rising. The verse from Joshua replayed quickly in her mind.
“And, so?”
“And so we’ve got to take a breather from our relationship. It’s too close.”
“Too close for who?”
“For me.”
“Okay, Michelle. I respect your space. Just let me know when you get over this hurdle and feel more secure about it.”
“If that ever happens, I’ll let you know.”
He nodded, but she noticed he suddenly looked vulnerable, like someone who had fears of his own. “You’ll be busy finishing up your master’s program and getting your internship completed for your license. You won’t miss having me around,” she offered.
“You’re wrong there, Michelle. I value our friendship and all your input.”
She didn’t know what to say.
“Well, I guess you said what you wanted to tell me.” He rose and picked up the bill.
“I’m sorry if I hurt you, Trevor. I just can’t compromise my marriage.”
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.” He gave her a sad, puppy dog smile and walked away.
She stared into her coffee cup, praying she was doing the right thing. What if God wanted her to be friends with him, to help him learn about her new faith?
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
As Michelle walked back into her house after her meeting with Trevor, her cell phone started ringing. She dug through her purse and flipped it open.
“Hello?”
“Mrs. Baron?”
“Yes.”
“This is Rhonda at Dr. Foster’s office.”
“Oh, hi.” She kicked off her shoes and sat down on the edge of the couch.
“I discussed your questions about infertility testing with the doctor, and she’d like to meet with you and your husband to go over the information. When would you be available to come in together?”
Michelle asked the nurse to hold on as she went to the kitchen to get Steve’s day-planner. She was able to set up an appointment for the following week.
As soon as the nurse hung up, Michelle dialed Steve’s number at work. “The doctor’s office just called,” she told him excitedly.
“Okay. When are you going in?”
“She wants to see both of us together. I set up an appointment for next week.”
“Can we talk about this tonight?”
“I guess. Why?”
“I just think we are rushing all this.”
“Oh,” she replied, a little disappointed.
“We’ll talk tonight, babe. I’ve gotta run. I’ve got a deposition in 15 minutes.”
Hanging up the phone, she sunk down into the chair and rested her head in her hands.
That night, Steve opened up to Michelle about all he was feeling. “We’re not trusting God with this, babe. We need to just relax and wait on His timing. I’m swamped at work right now; you’re just getting going with school again and trying to keep in touch with your mom. We’ve got time to think about a baby. If it happens, great. But I don’t see any reason to start a bunch of expensive medical tests already.”
Michelle looked down at her hands on her lap. She could feel tears beginning to fill her eyes. She forced them down into a hidden place in her heart. A place she could only share with God.
Steve squeezed her hand. “Can we just give this a little more time?”
She kept her head down but nodded.
“If nothing’s happened by summer, we can talk about it again.”
She nodded again, swallowing her frustration and fears.
“You okay?” he asked, turning her face toward his.
“I guess.”
“We will have a baby, Michelle. I promise.”
“Okay.” She kissed him lightly on the cheek and walked out of the room.
Michelle spent the next morning in prayer, pouring her heart out to God and pleading with Him for a baby. She knew Steve was right. They had plenty of time. But she had such a strong yearning. It was more powerful than any desire she’d had in the past. Surely God would answer a fervent prayer like hers.
By 11:00 she was already starting to get hungry. She knew she should just get a quick bite and work on her homework, but she really wanted to hang out with a friend. Picking up the phone, she decided to call Monica.
“Hey, girlfriend,” Monica exclaimed when she heard Michelle’s voice on the other end. “I was wondering if you lost my number or something.”
“I’m sorry. I know I haven’t called for a while. It’s just been really hectic around here with the holidays and everything.” She paused then added, “Hey, thanks again for all the cat sitting.”
“No problem. Want to go to yoga with me today?”
Michelle’s mind flashed back to a picture of Bev, the instructor, reading the tarot cards for her before her father’s suicide attempt. The death card had fallen in the center of the spread. She cringed at the memory. “I’m kind of out of the yoga thing, now.”
“Yeah. It’s been a long time since you went.”
“Anyway,” Michelle continued, “I was hoping maybe we could do something together, just the two of us — like have an early lun
ch.”
“That sounds fun. Where do you want to meet?”
“Why don’t you come over here? I have some stuff to make tacos.”
“Can I bring anything?”
“Just your usual friendly self,” she said warmly.
The two of them had a great time catching up on all the news in each other’s lives, and Michelle was really glad she had decided to call Monica. Max pranced around as if he enjoyed having both his ‘mothers’ together in one room.
“He really loves you,” Michelle said with a smile.
“That’s ‘cause I spoil him.” Monica scooped the cat into her arms and cradled him like a baby while she scratched under his chin.
“I can see that.”
“He’s such a cutie,” Monica crooned as she gave Max an Eskimo kiss.
“Speaking of babies...”
Monica looked up instantly. “You’re pregnant!”
“Well, no. But we’re trying.”
“That is so exciting, Michelle. I keep talking to Tony about maybe starting a family, too. He always worries about the money since construction work is so unpredictable. Wouldn’t it be cool if we both had kids at the same time?”
She wasn’t sure if she should tell Monica about the infertility specialist. It seemed so personal. Instead, she told her about her plans for the nursery.
“Noah’s ark? How cute is that?” Monica said enthusiastically. “It goes right along with your interest in learning about the Bible and everything.” The way she said it sounded as if this was a phase in her life.
“I guess you could say that,” Michelle replied. “I really hope my kids will feel the same way – about reading the Bible, I mean.”
“Oh, yeah. Me, too. I want my kids to explore everything,” Monica said agreeably, completely missing the thrust of Michelle’s comment.
Rather than getting into a heavy philosophical discussion, she asked, “Want to go up and see what I’ve got for the nursery so far?”
Monica eagerly agreed. She loved the little lamp and the rocking chair. Michelle showed her the catalog she got from the store with all the baby furniture and decorations.
“This room is going to be adorable, Michelle. I want to be the first to know when you find out you’re pregnant, after Steve, of course.”
Michelle smiled but made no promises, knowing she would want to tell her mom and Kristin right after Steve. A little flutter of fear grabbed her heart for a moment. What if she never did get pregnant?
Icy rain fell as Michelle pulled out of the college parking lot a week later. With only three weeks until the end of class, she was afraid it would be impossible to share her faith with Dr. Chambers. It frustrated her because she felt nudged to do so, not only by her grandfather’s suggestion, but also whenever she prayed for her professor.
Each class session she hoped for a moment alone with him before leaving. And each time, it seemed like students surrounded him with questions about their term papers or the final.
I wonder if Kelly would have any ideas, she thought as she carefully maneuvered her car through the limited visibility. Maybe I’ll drop by and surprise her.
As she pulled up in front of Kelly and Ben’s house, she saw the light on in the front room. Kelly often had a fire in the fireplace on days like this, and Michelle was looking forward to visiting with her friend and possibly sharing a hot cup of tea or coffee.
“Michelle. What a great surprise,” Kelly exclaimed as she opened the front door and hugged her sweater to repel the cold air. “Come in — quick!”
Michelle shut her umbrella, and shaking the water out of it, hurried inside.
“Whew! It’s freezing out there,” Kelly said, helping her out of her dripping raincoat. “I’ll hang this out in the garage for a while. Why don’t you go sit by the fire?”
“Thanks.” Michelle slipped her shoes off and headed for its blazing warmth. She rubbed her cold hands together then stretched them out toward the flames.
“Have a seat,” Kelly suggested, and gestured toward the rocking chair flanking the hearth. You can put your feet up and get warm. I’ll go heat up the coffee.”
She sank into the rocker and extended her legs, resting her stocking feet on the hearth. Soon they took on a toasty warmth. “Need any help out there?” she called toward the kitchen.
“Nope. I’m on my way,” Kelly replied as she pushed open the kitchen door with her hip and carried the tray of coffee mugs and creamer out to the front room.
“That smells like heaven,” she commented as Kelly placed the tray on the hearth.
“Hawaiian hazelnut. I thought we could use a little slice of the tropics today.” She smiled and handed Michelle a mug. “Creamer?”
“Is it that decadent stuff you gave me last time I was here?”
“One and the same – creamy French vanilla parfait.”
Michelle poured some into her cup, watching the ivory liquid swirl in the dark coffee. “Now I’m really glad I stopped by.”
“Me, too,” Kelly replied with a warm smile. “Don’t you have class today?”
“Yep. Just left there.”
“Oh. For some reason, I thought it was later in the day.”
“We’re supposed to go till 5:00, but we voted to skip the break in the middle of the two-hour block for the rest of the term and finish early. It was Dr. Chambers’ idea.”
“So, I’ll bet you’ll be glad to get out of his class after all you’ve told me about him.”
“Yeah. I sure won’t miss his lectures,” she agreed. “But there’s something I want to do before the end of the semester.”
“What?”
“Well, at Christmas time, my grandfather kind of challenged me to pray for Chambers and to look for an opportunity to share what God has done in my life over the past year. But every time I try to talk to him after class, he’s always surrounded by other students who have questions to ask about stuff.”
“Wow, Michelle. I don’t know if I’d have the nerve to talk to someone like him myself. You’re pretty brave to even try.”
“So, do you think I should just forget it?”
“No. Not at all.”
“Every time I pray about him, I feel like I’m supposed to tell him about my dad. He actually kind of reminds me of how my dad was before all this happened to him,” Michelle explained.
“That sounds like a good opening. You could probably just start by telling him what you just told me – that he reminds you of your dad. That would probably get his attention and make him curious.”
She nodded. “It’s so easy for me to think of what I want to say when I’m at home, but when I get to class, I feel so nervous, like what if I say the wrong thing or something.”
“How about this?” Kelly began. “You could write him a letter while you’re at home and all your thoughts are organized. Then you could give it to him at the end of class one day.”
“That’s a great idea. I could say something about him reminding me of my dad and then hand him the letter.”
“The other good thing about doing it that way is it gives him a chance to read it on his own without having to respond to you. If you talk to him in person, he might try to argue with you or discredit what you’re saying. But if it’s in a letter, there’s no one there for him to argue with. And if you give it to him on the day of the final, he can’t try to corner you after the next class and see if he can dissuade you.”
“You’re brilliant, Kelly,” she said excitedly. “I knew you’d have good advice for me.”
The two girls sipped their coffee and chatted about Kelly’s growing abdomen, their husbands, and the Bible study Ben was hosting for the new fellowship. He’d landed a job as a substitute teacher for the local school district, so he was gone most weekdays teaching a variety of grades and subjects as he worked to support their growing family while trying to launch the new church.
After about an hour, Michelle glanced at her watch. “I’d better get going,” she said.
> “Thanks for stopping by. It gets kinda lonely around here during the day.”
“We’ll have to set something up to get together more often. I’m registering for spring quarter at PNU next week. Then I’ll know my schedule better.”
“Sounds good,” Kelly replied with a smile. “Maybe we can do something with the guys one of these weekends, too.”
“Yeah. Let’s do it.” She agreed, picking up the tray to take it back to the kitchen.
“I’ll get your raincoat,” Kelly said.
As Michelle headed home, she said a little prayer thanking God for her friendship with Kelly and for the idea about how she could share her faith with Dr. Chambers. She’d start to write the letter this week and have it ready to give to him after the final.
Rick Chambers handed out the final and finished his instructions to the class. Then he took his seat and began paging through the term papers he’d just collected. He’d get as much grading done as he could during the two-hour final, and then give the rest of the papers to his T.A. to score.
By the end of the first hour, a few students had turned in their finals and left. That was either a very good sign or a bad sign. He’d seen some students ace the test in an hour. But those were the exception to the rule. Often the ones who finished first were just trying to escape their own realization that they should have studied harder.
He walked around the periphery of the room, stretching his legs and taking a look at the progress of those remaining. Then he sat back down and picked up his red pen.
Ten minutes before the end of class, he made an announcement. “Time’s about up. If you are already finished, look over your answers and then you can bring them up to me. I’ll be collecting everyone’s tests in ten minutes.”
A few students shifted in their chairs and took their tests up to his desk. When the time was up, Rick announced, “This concludes the allotted time for the exam. Please pass your tests forward and then you are dismissed.” He walked along the rows and collected the remaining tests.
As the students filed past him and out the door, he noticed one young lady lingering behind. Michelle Baron. He found her very attractive, but she was so quiet in class that he knew little about her. As the last student exited, she approached his desk.
Through the Tears (Sandy Cove Series Book 2) Page 20