Stop Dragon My Heart Around

by Susanna Scott

  “When I was a kid, a bunch of us got a pack and tried it. That was way before the tribe built the Smoke and Firework Store on the interstate.”

  “Did the Chief know?”

  “He found us, and he made me smoke the entire pack in a closet.” Tee felt ill at the memory of the smell. “It was a good lesson, I never touched them again. If one of my players blows smoke in my face, it still makes me gag.”

  “What made you think about that?”

  “Back then nearly everyone on the rez smoked. You don’t see so many people smoking now, and you never hear fireworks going off.”

  “You’re thinking about what I said earlier.” Leo nodded as if he could follow her train of thought. “That maybe a resort on the reservation wouldn’t be such a bad thing. If a smoke and fireworks stand didn’t increase use, maybe a casino wouldn’t increase gambling?”

  “Yeah.” She looked him square in the eyes. “You’re right. The reservation needs a sustainable source of income. When I talked to the principal, she wasn’t even sure that they had the electrical grid to support additional computers I wanted to buy. She was talking about having to turn off the air conditioners to run them.”

  “I’m betting the air conditioners win that battle.”

  “Exactly.”

  “Are you going to suggest building the resort to the Chief? He’s pretty determined that nothing should change.”

  “I know.” Sadness filled her. “I know he loves me and respects me, I even know he’s proud of me. But he’s always insisted I stay out of the tribal stuff.”

  “Maybe that’s why you’ve felt like you don’t belong, because he has protected you too much. Never gave you a chance to participate.” Leo shifted and gently unwound their ankles.

  “Yeah,” she said. “All this time, I’ve thought I was making my own way, but I let the Chief dictate my role in the tribe. I need to talk to him.”

  “I agree,” Leo said. “You want to leave now?”

  “You don’t mind?” It surprised her that he was willing to leave so much unsettled between them. “It’ll be the end of…you know—us. The dragon thing. I just can’t.” Tears filled her eyes. She never wanted to see the dragon beast again. “I love you, but I just can’t.”

  Leo brushed his finger over her bottom lip, and a pained look tensed the muscles around his beautiful green eyes. “It’s not the end, it’s just the beginning, but I understand that you need some time to process. It’s a lot to take in.”

  She shook her head. “I’m not going to change my mind on this.”

  “Listen to me.” He rested his hand under his chin. “It’s not the end.”

  She looked away. Although the tent was shaded from the mid-afternoon sun by the cliff, the air seemed to grow sluggish and too warm around them.

  “I do love you,” she said. “The human you.”

  Leo kicked the sleeping bag to the side of the tent. “Why do I sense a big but coming?”

  “But…you said I could help you save your dragon form. But why would you want to? If it goes away, then you can be normal. We could just belong to each other, like normal people.” She squeezed his arm, sensing his hurt.

  “You need to understand what you’re asking,” he said. “Losing my dragon would be like suddenly you weren’t Paiute anymore.”

  Tee considered his words, not understanding them at all. “To me, you would be free.”

  “Yes, but to me I would be dead. Imagine how hard it would be for you to suddenly become a totally different person, as if you weren’t Native American.”

  “It doesn’t seem the same to me at all.”

  “My dragon is a part of me. If I lost my dragon form, it would be like a part of me died.” Leo scooted to the exit of the tent and then looked back at her. “I had already decided I would give up my form for you, before I knew you were my mate. If that’s the only way we can be together, I’ll do it. You need to understand though that there will come a time when I won’t want to live in this world anymore, even with you.”

  Tee shook her head, rejecting the assertion. Surely, it wasn’t true. Surely once he changed into a human, he would see that he was fine. Fine with her. “That’s crazy talk.”

  Leo straightened. “I need to get out of here.” He grabbed his jeans and exited without another word.

  For a moment, Tee stayed in the stuffy confines of the tent. Doubt filled her. What if the dragon part of him really was so deeply a part of him that he would die? Could she live with herself for demanding that of him? She dressed and followed him.

  Outside the desert was quiet. The hottest part of the day had driven all the creatures to ground. Leo had pulled on his jeans, and stood bare-chested at the edge of the cliff.

  “I’m sorry,” she said when she was beside him. “I wish I felt differently.”

  He turned to her. Pain and raw emotion etched his beautiful face. She’d never seen him so serious. Her heart clenched. The doubt from before had her ready to backtrack, but then she saw a vision of the monster in the desert in her mind’s eye, and she knew again, no way could she live with it. Ever.

  “Okay.” He stroked her face. “If that’s what it will take, I’ll forsake my dragon for you. I love you that much.”

  She touched his hand. Her eyes sheened with moisture. “I love you too.”

  Leo pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her. “I need for you to understand, though. My dragon form is not a curse, it’s an amazing gift.” He met her eyes.

  Tee nodded and stepped back. She still didn’t really believe him, but she was trying to meet him halfway and understood it would cost him to give up his beast. She crossed her arms over her chest. “Is there anything else I need to know about my side of this thing?”

  Leo paused. “Your magical skills might increase.”

  “Magic?” Astonishment filled her. “Like our tribal medicine? Our connection with the earth and healing?”

  “No. Your magic is empathy. I’m certain of it. Humans who are matched with dragons seem to have subtle skills. Like Lucy, Alec’s mate. She has an ability with gems. She knows what they are and where they’ve come from.”

  “Alec’s a dragon too?”

  Leo nodded.

  Shock coursed through her. “Who else?” At his hesitation, she stepped back. “Who else, Leo? Tell me.”

  “It’s not for me to say.”

  “The hell it isn’t. I deserve to know.”

  Leo reached across the gulf and stroked her hair. “I would never let any of them harm you.”

  “Who?”

  Leo sighed. “Most of the casino employees have dragon forms. We’ve a sanctuary at the top of the casino.”

  “The dragons live in the casino?” Tee’s eyes widened and alarm coursed through her. “My God, it’s like the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Dragons right under everyone’s noses.”

  “Not quite.”

  “You’re right.” Her voice rose. “It’s worse.”

  “Let’s keep it simple for right now.” Leo reached for her but she stepped away. “I want you, you want me. I love you, you love me.”

  “Sorry. Not so simple,” Tee gave the words a biting edge. “What about this thing on my back, my mark? How am I going to explain this to everyone?”

  “You could cover it with makeup like Mei does.”

  “Mei’s a dragon, too, and Darius?”

  “Yes.”

  “Jane too?” Tee started to shake, panic making her head buzz.

  “Tee, relax.”

  “Relax?” Tee asked. “My friends didn’t tell me they’re dragons! We’ve lived together for years, how could I not notice?”

  He shrugged. “It’s your choice. I can’t make you do anything you don’t want to. I’ve told you I’ll abandon my dragon for you. What else do you want?”

  “If I decide I want to, un-match with you. Is that possible?”

  Leo’s eyes narrowed to green slits. “Yes, you could do that, but we’ll always have an awarenes
s of each other.”

  “So we can’t break up. It’s forever and ever, already.”

  “We can, but you and I’ll always be connected at a cellular level. I’ll always know if you’re scared or hurt.”

  “And if I have a car wreck, how am I supposed to explain a dragon showing up to my accountant husband?”

  “An accountant husband? I just told you I love you. You told me you love me. There’ll be no accountant husband. There’ll be only me.” He grabbed her arms. “Say it. Only me.”

  “Only you.”

  Leo pulled her into his embrace. Tee let the sensation of her smaller body tucking into his soothe her.

  An owl hooted across the canyon, “Hoo-hoo hoooooo hoo-hoo.”

  “An owl!” Tee glanced sharply over Leo’s shoulder at the large bird coasting above them. She watched his gliding path across the sky. “On my God. An owl. During the day.” New alarm brought all her senses rapidly awake. “We have to go.” She walked across the plateau to see the direction the owl flew.

  “Is an owl bad?” Leo asked.

  “Hoo-hoo hoooooo hoo-hoo,” the bird repeated.

  “He’s flying toward the powwow,” she said.

  Leo took her elbow and eased her back from the cliff’s edge. “Careful.”

  “It’s a bad omen. Something bad is going to happen. We need to get back to the ceremony see if they need help.”

  Leo looked more troubled than she felt.

  “Is there something else you need to tell me before we go back?”

  He shook his head. “Everything will be all right,” he said. “Whatever happens, we’ll deal with it.” He nodded as if he’d cast the vote and the proposal himself. “I’ll strike the tent, you take care of the fire.”

  Tee rushed to their water store and back to the campfire, upended the water container over the glowing embers, and stood back. The top layer hissed and gave way to black coals, but the under layer resisted.

  Leo watched the fire gurgle and hiss, dying. “Dousing a fire always makes my heart sad.” He touched his chest and Tee understood he was trying to share information about his dragon.

  She didn’t want to know anything else about dragons, so she turned away and started packing.

  When she was done, she glanced around. The campsite was clear and all the gear stashed in the back of Leo’s truck. The dead fire smelled of wet, burned wood—a noxious odor that said it was time to leave. The opposite in every way to a crackling, warm, and inviting campfire.

  “You ready?” Leo called.

  Tee walked to the truck’s passenger side and climbed in.

  “When we get to the ceremony, see if you can talk alone with the Chief.”

  “Why?” She took in his serious expression. “Don’t you want to be there? He’ll want to know if you saw the owl too.”

  “I just think you two should go somewhere and talk about things. I’ll take care of the others.”

  Tee furrowed her brow. “You’re keeping something from me,” she said, certain of it.

  Leo didn’t reply, and her unease spread. They rode the rest of the way in intense silence.

  No other vehicles were in the powwow parking area when they pulled in. The whole area was abandoned. No drums beat, and no voices sang. Something was very wrong.

  “Stay behind me.” Leo closed his truck door quietly. He ran across the rocks and Tee scrambled behind him to keep up.

  “Where did they go?” she asked.

  “I don’t know.” Leo reached back and she automatically took his hand. They topped the rise and looked down where the ceremony had been filled with people. The area was entirely vacant—as if no one had ever been there.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Tee knocked on the worn wooden door before stepping into the home of her youth. “Chief,” she called. Her throat was tight, and worry knotted her stomach. Although it was dark outside, the inside lights were off. The place felt as desolate and abandoned as the powwow.

  Behind her, Leo placed a steady hand on her shoulder. “He’s here.” She didn’t bother asking him how he knew. Probably super-duper dragon senses or something.

  Tee flipped the kitchen light on and rushed into the living room. The Chief sat in his favorite, broken-down chair. The one he refused to let her mother get rid of, the one with duct tape on the arms and a plywood board under the cushion. The one he slept on now that her Mom was gone. He said the bed was too cold and lonely.

  “Dad.” Tee kneeled beside her father to look into his eyes. Behind her, Leo closed the door to the garage and followed, flipping on more interior lights.

  The Chief wore his faded jeans and plaid shirt. His hands were splayed flat on his legs as if he’d halted in the motion of rising. His eyes were trance-like, open and unblinking.

  She shook him. Trembling started in her legs and moved upward, lodging in her throat with the thousands of things unsaid between them. She couldn’t lose him too. She needed him. All the petty arguments they’d had about the reservation came back to her.

  They didn’t really matter. Nothing mattered except for him.

  “Dad!” she yelled.

  The Chief turned his head to her and shook it as if returning from a far distant place. “Tallulah.”

  “You scared me.” She grabbed his hands, noting they were warm and dry. “All the lights were off and you were just sitting here so still.” Her voice shook. “What happened at the festival, why was everyone gone?”

  Leo sat on the couch catty-corner to them. He leaned forward, silent but listening. His presence was reassuring. Tee slid an armchair next to the Chief and focused on him, stroking the top of his veiny hand.

  “Johnny and his young men,” the Chief began. “They campaigned behind my back at the powwow and turned everyone against me. They convinced most of the tribe to give blood samples.”

  “No.” Tee was horrified that they would violate the sacred ceremony. “What are they going to do?”

  “They’ll use the results to vote the elders off the council. They’ll change the tribal rolls. They’ll build their casino.”

  Fear rolled through Tee, but she waited until he looked square at her and seemed ready to listen. “I saw an owl. During the day. He hooted twice.”

  The Chief inhaled sharply and sat forward. “Are you sure?” He looked at Leo for conformation. When Leo nodded, he turned to face her fully his eyes wide. “It’s very bad then.”

  “We tried to warn you at the ceremony, but you were already gone.”

  Leo cleared his throat. “If you want to stop them, there’s still time.”

  “They violated the sacred festival with their greed,” Tee said. “They must be stopped!”

  “Chief,” Leo interjected. “Tee has an idea for a resort on the reservation land. You could counter against a full-blown casino with a better idea.”

  The Chief shook his head.

  “You need to hear her out.” He sounded intractable, and Tee was grateful for his support. “You owe that to her.”

  The Chief met his stare.

  Leo stood, smoothed down his pants. “You two need a moment to talk privately.” He brushed the back of his hand down her arm and gave her a gentle smile. “I’ll be waiting for you outside.” He exited through the kitchen to the garage.

  Alarm tightened the back of Tee’s neck. “What did he mean?”

  Her father had gone pale. The creases around his mouth seemed to droop as if the unmoored weight of something very heavy pulled at them.

  “Is he threatening you?”

  “No, child. Your Golden Dragon is well known to me. He’s a friend, not a threat.”

  “You knew about the dragons?”

  “Since they came to the valley. They needed a place to hunt. Leo approached me with the truth, and I’ve allowed them to hunt on the west side of the reservation.”

  Tee listened to the explanation, unable to believe that everyone it seemed—but her, knew about the dragons.

  “Are you in love
with Leo?” the Chief asked. “He’s a good man. It would please me to have you settled with someone before I go to the sky.”

  “He’s a dragon.”

  “And a man. He would protect you when I’m gone.”

  Tee clenched her hands in her lap. “Don’t talk like that. You aren’t going anywhere.”

  “Your mother calls to me. When I’m waking in the morning, I hear her voice. She waits for me. I’ve seen it. It is beautiful. I’m ready to go.”

  “Please, don’t talk like that.” Panic filled her. “I need you. The tribe needs you.” She put her head in his lap the way she had when she was a child.

  “When I go, you mustn’t be sad. It would please me to see you settled with Leo.”

  “It’s not one or the other.” Her heart cracked.

  “There’s something I must tell you.” He lifted her head off his lap, but looked away from her. “It’s hard for me.”

  “What?” One thousand possibilities filled her mind. Was he sick? Was that what this was about? He’d been so frail lately. Beyond depressed, as if he were shrinking in front of her eyes. Tee tightened her inner resolve, her mind already on doctor appointments and specialists. Maybe James could help.

  “Your mother was pregnant with you before we married.” The Chief’s words broke into her planning, and his tone said it was the worst revelation in the world.

  Relief flooded her. This was the big secret? She squeezed his hand reassuringly. What a lot of fuss over nothing. “That doesn’t matter.” Here she’d anticipated months of hospital trips and the dreaded “C” word. “Don’t worry. There’re probably more babies started that way than between marriage sheets.”

  “I’m not your biological father.” The words were harsh and pain-filled.

  “What?”

  “Your father was a white man, a trucker your mother met in town. He abandoned her when she told him she was pregnant with you.” He put his feet squarely on the floor and squeezed her now numb hands. “I loved your mother. When he left her, I knew the chance would not come again. It didn’t bother me. I knew I could love you both. After a time, she came to love me as I loved her. And I always, always loved you. You were mine from the minute you were born.”