A Catered Christmas

by Isis Crawford

  They’d finish the dinner off with a buche de noel, assorted cookies, and two flavors of homemade ice cream—coconut and peppermint patty—served with a bittersweet chocolate sauce on the side. It was the meal they’d been having for as long as Libby could remember, and even though every year she and Bernie talked about changing it, they never did. After all, why mess around with perfection?

  “I hear Eric Royal is taking a job somewhere in the Virgin Islands, working for a hotel,” Bernie said as she dipped her spoon into her bowl of soup.

  “Really?” her dad said.

  Bernie nodded. “He said he wanted to get out of the business after this. Doesn’t have the stomach for it anymore.”

  “I can’t understand why,” Libby observed.

  Her dad took a bite of his roll. “Guess he doesn’t like blood sports.”

  “Guess not,” Bernie said. “Of course, he’s going to have to come back to testify in Estes’ trial if Estes’ lawyer wants him to.”

  Sean dabbed the sides of his mouth with his napkin. “I don’t think there’s going to be a trial.”

  Libby put her spoon down. “Why do you say that, Dad?”

  “Because Clyde told me they’re going to try to get Estes off on an insanity plea.”

  Bernie snorted. “Good luck.”

  “I don’t know,” Libby said as she finished the last of her soup. “Anyone who kills someone just to increase the ratings of his television show is insane in my book.”

  “Maybe in your book, but not in the industry people I know out in L.A. They would think that what he did was perfectly justified. Maybe even admirable.”

  “You’re exaggerating,” Libby told her.

  “Maybe by a little,” Bernie admitted. “But not by much.”

  Libby put her spoon down. “I don’t get it. If that was the case, why not kill Hortense on the show? Wouldn’t that have been more effective?”

  “Maybe too effective,” Bernie reflected. “Maybe he was afraid that if he did that, he’d lose his sponsors or get the FCC down on him for too much violence.”

  Libby watched her dad shake his head. “Ironic, isn’t it. Here he’s working so hard to get the murders publicized and here’s Bree trying so hard to hush them up. And all he wanted to do was get a buzz going for the show.”

  Libby took a bite of her roll. “So that’s why he kept on saying the show was cursed, but the only thing doing the cursing was him.” She shook her head, remembering what Estes had said about wanting to hire an exorcist.

  “Exactly,” Bernie said. She put her spoon down. “It always amazes me that people like to watch bad things happen.”

  “It wouldn’t amaze you if you were on the force. Ever try directing traffic around an accident? Unfortunately for Estes,” Sean observed, “he didn’t realize the extent of Bree’s influence, and he sure as hell didn’t realize that his plans and her plans were at cross purposes and that in a situation like that—”

  Libby finished the sentence for him. “Bree always wins.”

  Her dad nodded. “He never dreamed that she had the ability to get the chief of police to hush up Hortense’s death. So he decided to try again with Pearl.”

  “Well, Bree’s performance was pretty impressive in that regard,” Bernie said.

  Libby grunted. The less she thought about Bree Nottingham, the happier she felt. She changed the subject.

  “Poor Pearl,” she said. “Why pick her?”

  Her dad pushed his plate away and sat back. “Probably because she was the easiest one to get to. Estes knew that she had OCD. Everyone did. He knew that if he rearranged the lights slightly, Pearl would have to go over and fix them. And she did. She had to. She had no choice.”

  “But why did he come after you, Dad?”

  “Yes, Dad,” her sister repeated.

  Sean rubbed his forehead with his fingers. “Because he thought I knew something, which I obviously didn’t. By that time he was crazy. Here he was trying to create this situation and he kept on being stymied, and that made him do more and more coke, which was making him more and more paranoid; and on top of that, here you two were sniffing around, asking questions, and getting everyone all riled up. Then, in a final blow, I came along and asked Eric Royal that question about how the show was doing, and he freaked. Somehow Estes got it into his head that I was on to him, which wasn’t true, but by that time he was too far in his own world to come on back to the real one. I tell you one thing …”

  “What, Dad?”

  “I will never look at another spray can of that white Christmas snow in the same way ever again.”

  “And I will never go on another TV show as long as I live,” Libby said.

  “But we won,” Bernie pointed out.

  “And it so wasn’t worth it,” Libby said.

  “Maybe you’re right,” Bernie agreed.

  Libby put her hand over her heart. “You’re agreeing with me about something. I think I’m going to faint.”

  Bernie leaned over and hugged her. “You know I love you.”

  “I love you too,” Libby said. Then she went over and hugged her dad.

  “You just have to promise me one thing,” her dad said.

  “What’s that?” Libby asked.

  “No more fruitcake.”

  The following are some favorite holiday recipes from some of the best cooks I know. Enjoy!

  Recipes from Deb Hutchison

  Aunt May’s Rum Balls

  3 boxes Nabisco Vanilla Wafers

  1 cup sifted powdered sugar

  2 T cocoa

  2 T white corn syrup

  1 cup finely chopped pecans

  5–6 T dark rum

  Roll wafers very fine (or use a processor). Sift sugar and cocoa together. Mix dry ingredients together. Add rum and corn syrup and work a little at a time till it makes a firm ball. Roll into little balls (1 inch), then roll in powdered sugar. Ripen 3–4 days to 1 week.

  The kids love them!

  Date Pin Wheels

  1 cup granulated sugar

  1 cup brown sugar

  1 cup shortening (butter or margarine)

  3 eggs

  4 cups sifted flour

  1 tsp baking soda

  ݣtsp salt

  1 tsp vanilla

  ݣcup water

  ݣcup sugar

  1 box dates (pitted, cut fine)

  Cream sugars and shortening. Add eggs, beat well. Add flour, soda, salt that have been sifted together. Add vanilla. Set aside. Chill. Can stay in frig overnight if wrapped tightly in wax paper.

  Cook to a paste the ݣcup water, ݣcup sugar, and the cut dates. Cool.

  Cut dough in half. Refrigerate unused portion. Roll remaining dough into rectangle. Spread date mixture on dough and roll up. Slice about ݙinch thick. Bake on greased sheet for 10 minutes at 350 degrees. Repeat with second section.

  Cajun Seafood Stew

  16 oz shrimp

  ݙ cup flour, ݙcup oil = roux

  1 thinly sliced green pepper

  1 thinly sliced medium onion

  2 stalks chopped celery

  2 cloves diced garlic

  1ݣcups water

  1 can of tomatoes (1 lb)

  ݯtsp salt

  ݣtsp red pepper

  ݙtsp black pepper

  1–2 tbs file powder

  Make roux with flour and oil. Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly for 10 minutes or until golden brown. Add veggies. Cook 3–5 minutes. Stir in water, tomatoes, salt, and red and black pepper. Bring to boil. Add shrimp. Return to boil, reduce heat, and cook shrimp until pink (3 minutes). Stir in file powder right before serving. Serves six.

  Bob Hutchison’s Barbecued Ribs

  This recipe comes from the Costello Family Cookbook.

  Dry Rub Memphis Style

  12 parts paprika

  4 parts seasoned salt

  4 parts black pepper

  4 parts garlic powder

  2 parts cayenne pepper

 
2 parts oregano

  2 parts dry mustard

  1 part chili powder

  Stir this up and then store in glass jar. We use 1 tbs to equal 1 part. Rub this into your pork ribs and grill.

  How to cook ribs:

  Use baby back pork ribs (don’t pull membrane). Coat ribs with dry rub, amount by preference. Cook in covered barbecue kettle with indirect heat (325 degrees or 50 coals) over drip pan for one hour. Enjoy!

  Susan Hawks’ Christmas Desserts

  Buche de Noel

  Cake:

  6 egg yolks

  ݣcup powdered sugar, sifted

  1 tsp vanilla

  6 tbs cocoa sifted

  ⅛sp salt

  6 egg whites

  Filling:

  1 pint whipping cream

  superfine sugar to taste

  Rum, Grand Marnier, or other flavored liqueur to taste

  Preheat oven to 325 degrees.

  Line jelly-roll pan with parchment, extending several inches over ends. Oil well. Beat yolks until light. Add sugar gradually and beat until very creamy. Blend in vanilla, then cocoa and salt. Beat egg whites until stiff but not dry. Fold into cocoa mixture. Spread in prepared pan and bake until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, about 25 minutes.

  Immediately turn onto damp towel lined with parchment. Peel paper from cake. Roll cake lengthwise and let cool at room temperature.

  Whip cream with sugar and liqueur to taste until quite stiff. Unroll cooled cake carefully. Spread with whipped cream. Using towel, roll lengthwise, ending with seam on bottom.

  Carefully transfer to a serving plate. Before serving, dust cake with powdered sugar to look like snow. Decorate with meringue marzipan mushrooms, chocolate leaves, or marzipan holly and berries.

  Ginger Snaps

  Mix together:

  ݯc. soft shortening

  1 c. sugar

  Add:

  ݙc. dark molasses

  1 egg

  Sift together:

  2 tsp baking soda

  2 c. flour

  ݣtsp cloves

  ݣtsp ground ginger

  ݣtsp salt

  Add dry ingredients to shortening mixture. Mix until just blended. Chill. Form 1-inch balls and roll in white sugar. Place on baking sheet with 2 inches between each. Bake at 375 degrees for about 8 minutes. Do not overbake—they’re best when they’re soft.

  Recipes from Linda Kleinman

  Holiday Potato Pancakes

  For Six:

  Use 6 peeled Idaho potatoes (one for each person).

  Grate potatoes. Press liquid out. Combine with 1 medium grated onion. Add between ⅓nd ݣcup Matzoh meal, 1 T salt, pepper to taste.

  In a large cast-iron or enamel skillet, add 4 T of canola oil, and heat until extremely hot (almost smoking). Drop by slotted spoonfuls into pan. They should sizzle. Flip when brown.

  Serve immediately with applesauce and sour cream. If you’re doing these in advance, put on a rack and put in warm oven.

  Variation: Make them smaller and serve with caviar and sour cream as an appetizer.

  Holiday Pumpkin Bread

  Sift together:

  3⅓ups flour

  1ݣtsp salt

  2 tsp baking soda

  Add:

  3 cups sugar

  ݣtsp ginger

  1 tbs cinnamon

  1 tbs nutmeg

  Mix well.

  Blend:

  1 cup canola oil

  ⅔up water

  4 whole eggs

  2 cups unseasoned pumpkin puree

  Optional: nuts, raisins, cranberries

  Add above to flour mixture.

  Pour in either three greased 8” by 4” loaf pans with greased wax paper on the bottom or two 9” by 5” loaf pans.

  Bake in 350 degree oven for 1 hour or until done. Cool. Wrap in foil. Let age overnight. Can age for 10 days. Freezes well.

  Sorbets

  Pineapple-Banana Sorbet

  1 ripe pineapple

  2 ripe bananas

  ݙcup apple juice

  Peel and core pineapple. Cut into chunks over a bowl to catch any juice. Put pineapple, pineapple juice, and bananas in a food processor. Process until pureed. Add apple juice, and process again until the mixture is very smooth. Turn into electric ice cream maker and freeze according to the manufacturer’s directions.

  Apricot Sorbet

  1 16 oz. can apricots, drained and pitted

  ݙcup lemon juice

  1 cup water, 1 cup sugar, 2 egg whites

  Puree apricots and lemon juice in processor. Place in bowl. Combine ݯcup sugar and 1 cup water. Boil 5 minutes, add to puree, and chill. Beat egg whites until they form soft peaks, gradually add ݙcup sugar, continue beating until whites form stiff peaks, and fold into puree. Freeze in two ice cube trays. As soon as edges are hard, put into a bowl and beat until smooth. Freeze again. Continue process two or three times. Serve in chocolate shells.

  Strawberry-Rhubarb Sorbet

  Combine 1 cup sugar and 1ݣcups water in deep sauce pan. Bring to a boil. Add ⅛sp powdered ginger, continue boiling for 7 minutes. Add ݣlb rhubarb, trimmed, peeled, and cut into 1-inch pieces. Cover pot and boil for 10 minutes. Add a 12 oz. box of frozen strawberries with sugar syrup that has been defrosted. Remove pot from heat and cool. Put in ice cream maker and follow manufacturer’s directions. Serve plain or with vanilla ice cream.

  Murphy’s Special Sauce

  For use on or with chicken wings. This recipe was stolen from the vaults of the Murphy family castle. First, the ingredients are fairly simple if you use the generic variety. Cayenne pepper–based hot sauce made from hand-picked peppers by our Southern relations (so you know you’re getting the very best). This is carefully simmered for 14 days on a 100-year-old iron wood-burning stove, using only 5-year-old aged cherry wood from North American cherry farms. Then it’s time to add the honey mustard ingredients before properly storing for further use. The honey also comes from further Southern relations who use only killer-bee honey after interviewing each bee to see if he’s up to the task. This, as you know, is quite time-consuming and adds to the cost of production, even in Mexico. The mustard seeds used for the production of the special sauce always came from the same plantation on an uncharted island in the South Pacific that has just been washed away in the wake of the recent tsunami, so everybody will be using a generic substitute before long. Serve warm over hot wings. Sides of blue cheese are acceptable.

  Cupid couldn’t be any busier than caterers Bernadette and Libby Simmons on Valentine’s Day. This year, a fund-raiser is taking up a lot of their time. And though love is in the air, so is murder …

  Bernie and Libby, owners of A Taste of Heaven, have plans to partner up with the Just Chocolate store for a taste-tempting Valentine’s Day fund-raiser featuring pairings of exotic chocolates, food, and wine, as well as a kissing booth, a fashion show, and a bachelor auction. And though Bernie isn’t too happy about her boyfriend volunteering to be auctioned off, she’s got too much on her plate to be jealous: one of the coolers is leaking, they need a new butter supplier, employees have relationship issues, and the mother of a very good client has died.

  Putting their preparations on hold, Bernie and Libby attend the funeral, only to be recruited to help solve a mystery. In an old cemetery-turned-lover’s lane, the body of Ted Gorman has been found in someone else’s grave. The same Ted Gorman who supposedly died in a fiery car crash weeks earlier, leaving his body nearly unrecognizable. But, though Libby and Bernie can easily tell that it’s him, Libby knows there’s something “off” about the body, though she can’t put her finger on it.

  Ted was the owner, with his wife, of Just Chocolate. So now, as Bernie and Libby continue working with the grieving widow, they open up a mixed box of dark financial scandal, sticky family ties, bittersweet passion, and just desserts. And the chocolate-covered clues will lead to someone with blood on their hands …

  Please turn the page for an exci
ting sneak peek at A CATERED VALENTINE’S DAY coming in hardcover in January 2007!

  Chapter 1

  Bernie entered the room ahead of her sister. Drats, she thought as she looked around. There were no empty seats, at least none that she and Libby could get to easily. Plus the minister was already giving his eulogy, which meant they’d missed most of the ceremony. This was not good. Not good at all. Being late to a movie was one thing; being late to a funeral was quite another.

  “I told you we should have left earlier,” Libby hissed in her ear.

  Bernie grunted. She wasn’t taking the blame for this one. She wasn’t the one who had decided they had to go to the funeral at the last minute. And she wasn’t the one who’d decided that wearing her Dolce and Gabbana slacks and a mauve blouse wasn’t “respectful enough,” an archaic concept if she’d ever heard one.

  The lady in the last row was wearing red and the woman right next to her had on a pink jacket for heaven’s sake. It wasn’t her fault her navy suit was hiding underneath her ski stuff or that her navy suede pumps had gotten stuck behind her travel bag. How often did she wear this kind of stuff? Never. That’s how often. At least not since she’d quit her straight job five years ago. More like ten actually.

  Bernie automatically rebuttoned her top suit button so the lace on her cami wouldn’t show. So maybe she had taken a little more time than was strictly necessary putting on her eyeliner and mascara. So maybe she did hate funerals.

  Okay, loathed them. Had ever since Uncle Tom’s coffin slid out of the hearse on the way to the funeral and got hit by a milk truck. She hadn’t had a milk shake since that day and they’d been her favorite food. Bernie repressed a shudder. Uncle Tom all over the highway had not been a pretty sight. Fortunately Aunt Ethel had been too drunk to make much sense of what was gong on.

  Bernie sighed. When she died she wanted to be cremated and have her ashes shot into space. Or sent down in the deepest chasm in the ocean or scattered in the Himalayas. The walk would do Libby good. After all, she kept saying she had to get more exercise. Bernie luxuriated in the thought of Libby trudging up the side of the mountain, bearing her ashes through a blizzard.