Bad Boyfriend

by K.A. Mitchell

  “Eli—”

  “I know. I’m something else.” Eli spread the sweater out a little bit. “Just one more service I provide. Tell them I have to go take pictures for something.”

  “A photographic emergency? In the arts community?” Quinn produced a smile without his usual mockery in it.

  “It can get pretty wild.” Eli nodded solemnly, then focused on buttoning his blazer. That smile was freaking lethal, especially to a guy with two Canadian whiskeys, a recent orgasm and Peter-needs-his-ass-kicked adrenaline in his system. No wonder it had Eli’s stomach doing back flips. But as amazing as the smile was, Eli’d had more than enough of dysfunctional fun for one day.

  “I’m so sorry you have to leave,” Claire said, and Eli managed to keep her hug confined to an arm pat. He may have been exaggerating about his sense of smell, but he was pretty sure he and Quinn weren’t exactly exuding freshness. “I’ll call you and we’ll set up a time for the family picture, all right?” she continued, maintaining her grip on his arm. “Be sure to bring a camera that has a timer so you can be in the shot too.”

  “Absolutely.”

  “And don’t forget our shopping date,” Alyssa added.

  “I’m so glad you were a part of this.” Chrissy managed to get her arms around Quinn, though he gamely kept the sweater draped in front. “I know it meant a lot to Peter.”

  Eli barely managed to avoid swallowing his tongue.

  Chrissy let them go with a “We’ll be in touch,” and then they made it safely into the parking lot.

  Quinn settled into the driver’s seat with a long sigh. “Thanks. I think.” He started the car. “Where to?”

  “I was going to suggest your place again. I had the whole Facebook post planned out. My Thirty-Seven-Hour Date.”

  “But now?”

  “My apartment would be good, thanks.”

  “I guess I owe you some kind of explanation.” Quinn stared straight ahead but didn’t put the car in drive.

  “You don’t owe me anything, really. I got fucked. I got fed. I could have skipped the church bit, but other than that it wasn’t a bad date. Believe me. I’ve had worse.”

  “That sounds like an interesting story.” Quinn backed out of the space and headed east out of the parking lot.

  “I don’t kiss and tell.”

  “Except on Facebook?”

  “It was going to be very general, I swear. I never give any incriminating details like tattoos or Daddy kinks.”

  Quinn’s hands tightened on the wheel. “I’d never done that before.”

  Eli hadn’t ever found anyone who gave him as much as he could handle before either, but he wasn’t admitting that. “Really? You’re a natural. I loved it.”

  Silence followed them downtown. As they waited at the light on Broadway in front of Johns Hopkins, Quinn turned to face him.

  “Ten years,” he said without any need for clarification.

  “Fuck.” Eli couldn’t picture that length of time. Being with anyone, living anywhere, having the same job. Ten years. To have something that felt that solid and then— “Damn.”

  Quinn shrugged and took a left on Fayette. “What’s funny is that I’m a lot happier now.”

  Eli wasn’t. The weight of it seemed to press him into the seat. He wanted to get out and jog the rest of the way. There wasn’t any parking, for which Eli was grateful, but there wasn’t any traffic eager to move Quinn along when he double parked in front of the apartment.

  “So I owe you one,” Quinn said.

  Owed him—oh. Their agreement. But Eli was thinking about ten years of a family where you suddenly didn’t belong anymore. How did Quinn stand it, being around them because what, they felt sorry for him?

  “No problem, like I said.”

  Quinn’s half smile looked hesitant this time. “Eli, I want to see you again.”

  “You’re sweet.”

  Quinn’s eyebrows shot up. “Sweet?”

  “And hot. And fucking awesome in bed. But that whole thing—it’s kind of more complicated than I’m comfortable with.”

  “Welcome to life, kid.”

  “And thanks for ending this on a patronizing note, Daddy.” Eli shoved open his door.

  “Wait.” Quinn crooked a finger in Eli’s belt loop, but instead of copping a feel, which would have done a lot to fix his last stupid remark, he fished Eli’s phone out of his pocket. He fiddled with it for a couple of seconds before handing it back. “Now you’ve got my number if you change your mind.” He unhooked his seat belt.

  Eli supposed a kiss wouldn’t be a bad ending either, but Quinn didn’t kiss him. He twisted Eli’s lapel around a fist and dragged Eli close enough to growl in his ear. “Because I always keep my promises.”

  Eli peeled off his clothes and crammed them in the top of his laundry bag. Not that he had enough money to do laundry. Or to write the check for his share of the rent that Marcy was going to be in his face about though it was only the tenth and it technically wouldn’t be late until the fifteenth.

  “But it’s due on the first,” she’d whine again, like she had been since she moved in. Which wouldn’t be a problem except blah-blah-blah dropping ad revenues and if Nate could keep any photographer on staff he’d keep Eli. But when most of the staff writers got cut, so did Eli, and now he was down to getting paid per assignment.

  And none of that would suck nearly as much if the hottest sex of Eli’s life hadn’t just happened with a completely unavailable, hung-up-on-his-asshole-ex, wrapped-up-in-family-drama, gorgeous, sexy, not-at-all-an-arrogant-dick man.

  He flopped onto his mattress. If Casey hadn’t moved down to nowhere North Carolina, they’d sit on the couch and analyze Quinn until Eli either erased his number or figured out a way to get the awesome sex without the complications.

  Someone came in the front door and down the hall into the kitchen. Marcy. Whenever she came home she dropped off her stash of stolen creamers and artificial sweeteners, lemon, ketchup and Tabasco packets and whatever else she’d stuffed in her purse. Then she’d sigh and open the fridge, sigh and close it, reopen it like the contents had changed and then close it. She was always on a diet. Eli was tempted to eat an entire carton of ice cream in front of her every night since he never gained a pound, but he’d puke before it sank into her thick skull.

  He had to get the hell out. Everything else was too complicated to deal with, but since Nate and Kellan had moved into an apartment with a laundry room in the basement, and it was almost Nate’s fault Eli didn’t have any money, now at least he had a plan.

  Eli caught sight of Nate dragging his scooter through the front door of the building and jogged the last quarter of a block. The weight of his laundry duffle and the two sodas he’d brought as a bribe made the last ten steps a hell of an effort, especially when Nate looked up and glared.

  “Now you’re stalking me at my house? I told you we don’t need you until next weekend.”

  “I’m only interested in your amenities right now.” Eli turned enough so Nate could see the bag.

  A window overhead opened. “C’mon up, Eli.” Kellan’s deep voice floated down.

  As Eli stepped into the hall, he said, “There isn’t anything, though? No assignments? Something else I can do? Filing? Cleaning?”

  Nate’s face tightened. Someone who didn’t know him would think he was mad, but Eli wasn’t fooled. Slinging an arm around Eli’s shoulders, Nate muttered, “I’d do anything if I could, you know. I hate this.”

  A lot of Nate’s rougher edges had rubbed off after a year of living with Kellan’s smile. But Eli was all sweaty from his run so he ducked out of the hug. “I know.”

  Nate took the laundry bag from Eli’s shoulder and started for the basement. “At least tell me you brought your own detergent?”

  Eli held out his hands. “It was heavy.”

  “You’re lucky Kellan likes you.” Nate shoved the bag back at Eli and took the grocery bag.

  “Oh, Kellan likes me.”r />
  “He only likes you because you bring him soda.” Nate thudded up the stairs, and Eli lugged his laundry down into the musty-smelling cement basement.

  After his clothes were folded and stuffed back into the bag, Eli offered to make dinner as a thank-you. Nate replaced the large skillet Eli had unearthed from the cabinet.

  “No thanks. We were planning on…” Nate’s gaze flicked over Eli’s shoulder in Kellan’s direction, “…ordering in,” he finished with a sigh and an eye roll.

  Eli didn’t care. He was having a crisis. Kellan and Nate could fuck or whatever else they’d been planning another time.

  Kellan had his phone out before Nate could finish exhaling. “Pizza, all veggie, coming up.”

  “Pizza?” Nate’s brows shot up.

  “After last night, you know I deserve better than bean scum.” Kellan had a sexy voice, deep with a ripple of laughter in it, but it couldn’t make Eli shiver like Quinn’s did.

  Eli leaned against the counter. “Ooo. I want details.”

  “Not a chance.” But Kellan put his arm around Eli’s shoulders and leaned next to him. “Instead, you can tell us about tall, dark and—”

  “Old?” Nate suggested.

  With a deliberate stare at Nate, Eli pushed away from the cabinet. “Gimme old any day because that was absolutely the best sex of my entire existence.” He reached into the fridge for a bottled water and rubbed it over his face and neck. “I get hot just thinking about it.”

  “Ouch. Score.” Kellan’s laugh rumbled through the kitchen.

  Nate folded his arms. “If it was that good, why are you plaguing us with your presence when you could be having the best sex of your entire existence.” His tone didn’t need air quotes. He made his sneer do it for him. “Did you give him a heart attack? Make him run out of his little blue pills?”

  Eli wiped some condensation off the bottle then licked it off his thumb. “Nope. I cut him loose. Great in bed. Way too much baggage.”

  “Besides the stuff under his eyes?”

  Eli made a hissing cat noise that had Nate’s cat Quan Yin whining back. “Step back, Kellan. I think we’re on the verge of a queen out. Jealous, Nate?”

  “Be serious,” Nate scoffed.

  “Sounds kinda jealous to me.” Kellan picked up Yin and cuddled her. She flopped contentedly in the cradle of his arm.

  “You’d be happier if you dated guys closer to your age.”

  “Hey Gray,” Eli said as if he were addressing Nate at the advice column he did for the paper. “Did I ask for your advice?”

  “You’re not going to find some kind of substitute for—”

  “The father who threw my ass out on the street while I was still in high school? God, take a few psych courses in college and you too can be an annoying, know-it-all asshole. Do you think that’s what Kellan is doing? Looking for a substitute father?”

  Eli wondered how Nate could type out his advice if he always had that judgmental, defensive, arms-folded thing going on.

  “Kellan’s different. His father—”

  “Everyone is different.” Eli threw up his hands. “I’m different. Did it ever occur to you that maybe I date older guys because they’re hot? And they usually have their shit together?”

  Nate blinked, but he didn’t answer.

  “The guys my age are fucking infants. Either they just came out, or they’ve had it so easy they have no idea what life is like. They’ve never had to worry about where they’re going to live.” Eli swallowed hard. That was one of the things he’d come over here to stop thinking about.

  Yin jumped up on the kitchen table and sharpened her claws on the paper before sprawling out. Eli ran a hand through her long hair and then rubbed his face in her fur. It made him feel better for a second. He’d like to have a cat, but he had enough trouble keeping a roof over his own head.

  He felt Nate come up behind him but slipped away onto one of the kitchen chairs and kept petting Yin. When he was sure his face was under control, he looked up. “Where’s Kellan?”

  “Probably went to pick up the pizza. He doesn’t like it when things get loud.”

  “And yet he lives with you.”

  “We manage.” Nate’s face twisted in a wry grin.

  Eli rubbed Yin behind her ears until she purred and snugged herself against his arm.

  Nate was one of the most opinionated dicks on the planet, but living with Kellan had done more than smooth his rough edges. It had actually given him some people skills. He let a few more minutes of silence tick by before saying, “Tell me about this guy. I promise to avoid dispensing know-it-all advice for ninety seconds.”

  “That would be some kind of record. I think you’re just trying to pick up sex pointers.”

  “Don’t need any.”

  “He really doesn’t.” Kellan came back in and slid the box onto the table. Yin sniffed it, gave Kellan a disappointed look, jumped down and walked away, fluffy tail curled in disdain. “I want to hear this too.”

  “There’s nothing to tell.” Eli scooped a slice from the box.

  “How did you find out about the baggage, then?” Kellan asked.

  “He took me to meet his family.”

  Nate choked. Kellan whacked his back and said, “Before or after you…” He waved the slice of pizza in his hand.

  It was kind of adorable that Kellan could still get a little shy about gay sex. “Fucked?” Eli finished for him. “After.” He remembered the bathroom. Oh yeah. “And before.”

  Nate took a long drink. “So did he also propose?” he managed to rasp out.

  “It wasn’t like that. Exactly. He had a thing he had to go to. And it wasn’t exactly his family.”

  “That’s a lot of not exactly’s. Stick to photography and swear to me you’ll never try writing,” Nate suggested.

  “Stop editing the entire population of earth and let him tell the story,” Kellan said.

  Eli was enjoying this now. He shifted out of direct range and watched Nate take another bite of pizza.

  “He already had plans to go to a baptism. The family is his ex-boyfriend’s, but they’re still close.”

  Nate swallowed the pizza and reached for his soda. “The family or the boyfriend?”

  “The family, mostly, but Quinn stood as the baby’s godfather.” Eli watched Nate drink. “Even though his ex-boyfriend is the baby daddy.”

  X-treme Cream soda launched in a spray across the kitchen.

  There were parts of Nate that would never change. Eli held up a napkin. “God, you’re so fucking easy.”

  Eli didn’t know much besides the bare bones of the Quinn and Peter and Chrissy soap opera, so there wasn’t much detail to give. He hadn’t actually come over here for Nate’s Hey Gray advice, which tended to be snarky and cynical enough to sell papers. As much as he loved Nate, it was Kellan Eli wanted to talk to—without Nate’s acidic remarks burning holes in the conversation.

  As Kellan tossed away the trash and wrapped up the remaining two slices of pizza, Nate pushed away from the table.

  “I’ve got to finish up my column for this week.”

  The Hey, Eli, don’t let the door hit you on the way out came through as clear as if Eli were wearing a Nate translator. Putting on as pathetic a face and as plaintive a voice as he could manage, Eli said, “Can I stay over?” Into the silent glance between his friends he added, “She hates me. I don’t know why.”

  “On the couch,” Nate agreed with a sigh.

  “But you guys have a king, and I swear my hands will stay on top of the covers.”

  “The couch,” Kellan said firmly.

  Nate slung an arm around Eli’s shoulders. “Behave.”

  Eli managed to duck the kiss that followed enough that it landed on his ear. “Yes, former boss.” He couldn’t avoid the light swat on his ass. It only reminded him of where he wasn’t spending the night.

  “Want to watch a movie?” Kellan dropped onto the couch, legs stretched onto the coffee table, rem
ote in his hand.

  Eli hurried to get his head in Kellan’s lap before Yin could steal the spot. “I still can’t believe he let you get a TV, let alone one bigger than an iPad. It must be true love.” Eli settled on his side, legs stretched out, head on Kellan’s thighs.

  Kellan stopped flipping through the on-demand listings, resting a hand on Eli’s head. “And does that bug you?”

  “Huh?”

  “Nate with me, I mean.”

  “No. I told you that when you got together.”

  “Yeah?” Kellan’s fingers stroked through Eli’s hair until Eli wanted to purr like Yin. “Then how come you don’t let him kiss you or hug you like you do me?”

  It didn’t have anything to do with being in love with Nate. Not that Eli really had been. He’d only thought he was. Thought that after they’d fucked, Eli might wear Nate down for some more sex and maybe boyfriend status. But then Eli had seen Nate and Kellan look at each other, that one time, that first night Kellan stayed. Eli knew he’d been totally wrong. That was love. He wasn’t saying he believed in soul mates or whatever, but he’d known right then Nate was completely unavailable. Forever.

  Eli waved his hand, wrist flopping. “But, dahling, I’ve had him. You are something mysterious.”

  “Yeah, right. Is it the job thing? You know, he threw up all night before he went in to tell you.”

  “It’s not the job either.” Warning Yin off Kellan’s lap territory with a glare, Eli sat up so he could make Kellan understand. “I love him—love you both, but not that way. If he thinks I’m pissed at him, I’ll go blow him, okay?”

  “No you won’t.” Kellan yanked Eli’s head back down but kept him carefully on his thighs.

  Kellan let the subject drop. Good thing because Eli wasn’t sure exactly how to answer him. It was different with Kellan. Not that Eli wouldn’t have jumped into bed with him if Kellan had hit on him before he and Nate got together, but since Eli and Kellan hadn’t—wouldn’t ever—cuddling didn’t feel all that different than if Eli were Kellan’s cat.