She Left Me Breathless

by Trin Denise

  “M-o-m,” Alyssa said, dragging out the word.

  “What did Christy’s mom say?”

  “She said it was okay with her if it was okay with you. Please? I’ll clean my room for the next two weeks.”

  Caitlyn laughed. “Lyssa, you already clean your room. It’s cleaner than mine.”

  Alyssa put her index finger over her mouth. “Shhh,” she said to Caitlyn in a conspiratorial tone.

  “Okay,” Caitlyn whispered back.

  Rachel cleared her throat. She placed her hands on her hips. “In case you two have forgotten, I’m standing right here and I can hear everything you’re saying,” she said, looking back and forth at her two daughters.

  “Oh yeah,” Alyssa grinned at her mom. “Does that mean I can go?”

  “Yes, you can go,” Rachel said. “Now go get your overnight bag because I know you’ve packed it already.”

  “Yes,” Alyssa said, making a fist pump in the air as she ran out of the kitchen.

  “Mom, I have something important that I need to talk to you about and I think you may want to sit down for this,” Caitlyn said, taking Rachel by the hand. “Don’t worry, it’s not that bad, or at least I don’t think it is,” she quickly added when she saw the worried look on Rachel’s face.

  “Okay,” Rachel said slowly as she sat down at the table.

  Caitlyn pulled out a chair and slid it over next to Rachel’s chair. She took her mom’s hand in hers. She cleared her throat. “I’m just going to say this. I’m a lesbian,” she said and then waited for her mom’s reaction.

  Rachel looked at her in stunned silence. Several long seconds went by without her saying anything.

  “Mom, please say something,” Caitlyn said.

  “Um ... I’m sorry, baby. I’m just a little shocked, that’s all,” Rachel said.

  “Do you hate me?” Caitlyn asked, a worried look on her face.

  Rachel cupped Caitlyn’s face with her hands. “Oh, sweetheart. I could never hate you.”

  “You kinda look a little pale right now,” Caitlyn laughed.

  “It’s just ... I mean ... are you sure?” Rachel asked, her words jumbled as her mind tried to wrap around what Caitlyn was telling her.

  Caitlyn smiled. “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”

  “Come here,” Rachel said, pulling Caitlyn into her arms. “I love you, Caitlyn, and I just want you to be happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you and Alyssa both.”

  Caitlyn leaned back so she could look at Rachel. “I have another confession to make,” she said a little reluctantly.

  Rachel leaned back in her chair. “Don’t tell me you’ve decided to run off and join the circus,” Rachel laughed.

  “Jesus Christ woman, can a man get a damn drink in this house?” Edward yelled from the other room.

  Caitlyn rolled her eyes. “How about getting it yourself,” she mumbled under her breath.

  “It’s okay,” Rachel said, her eyebrows furrowing into a frown. “I’ll get it for him. Would you mind running Alyssa over to Christy’s?”

  “I don’t think I should leave. Why don’t you come with us?” Caitlyn asked, concern etched on her face.

  “I’ll be all right, baby,” Rachel said, reassuringly. With any luck, he’ll drink enough and pass out, she thought to herself.

  “I won’t be long and when I get back, I’d like to finish our conversation,” Caitlyn said, looking at her mom. She turned toward the doorway leading into the family room, her brows still creased into a frown. “Come on Mini-me,” she yelled. “I’m getting old standing here.”

  “You’re too funny,” Rachel laughed. She opened the cabinet and grabbed a tall glass off the shelf.

  “Are you sure, you’ll be okay?” Caitlyn asked again. She didn’t want to leave her mom alone with Edward, especially after he had been drinking heavily and lately, that seemed to be from the time he got up until the time he went to bed or passed out, whichever came first.

  Rachel smiled. “Yes, baby, I am,” she said just as Alyssa came into the kitchen carrying her overnight bag.

  “Bye, Mom. I love you,” Alyssa said, wrapping her arms around Rachel’s waist.

  “I love you, too, sweetheart,” Rachel said and kissed the top of Alyssa’s head.

  Rachel waited for the girls to leave and then filled the glass three-fourths of the way full with whiskey, topping it off with a small amount of Coke. “Hopefully, this will do the trick,” she said to herself as she picked up the glass and headed toward the family room.

  Chapter 10

  Christmas and New Years day had come and gone and things at Welsh had returned to normal. Jackie’s investigation continued along at a snail’s pace and they had yet to discover the identity of the account owner embezzling the funds from Welsh. Sydney liked to think of herself as a patient person but even she had her limit and she had long since reached it. She wanted answers and results and she wanted them now.

  She and Rachel had not spoken or seen each other since Christmas Eve. Over the past few weeks, Sydney had thought long and hard about the way she had handled things. She knew she was out of line and that she owed Rachel an apology.

  She took her cup of coffee and walked over to the bay window that looked out into the backyard. She smiled as she watched a Northern Harrier bathing in the heated birdbath next to the flower garden.

  Her thoughts turned to Rachel. She knew Rachel would be in the design room because she had been in her room when she heard Rachel’s car. She had watched through her bedroom window as Rachel parked. The unexpected racing of her heart and the sudden dryness in her mouth had caught her off-guard and her first instinct had been to go to her but something had held her back. She wasn’t sure if it was embarrassment for her behavior weeks earlier or if was more out of fear.

  She took a sip of coffee. “You’re only fooling yourself, kiddo,” she said aloud, shaking her head. “I think my little plan may be back-firing on me.”

  Rachel stared at the computer screen with a blank look on her face. She had been looking at the dining room photo for the last fifteen minutes but for some reason she couldn’t get her mind to engage on the work that needed to be completed.

  She hated to admit it but she had been disappointed that Sydney wasn’t home when she had arrived earlier. The more she tried to focus on the design changes, the more her mind wandered and the more her thoughts repeatedly turned to Sydney.

  Over the last two weeks, everywhere she looked she saw Sydney’s beautiful smiling face. She had reminisced about the love they had once shared. The thoughts had left her happy, yet sad at the same time. She had dared to let herself dream about the life she and Sydney could have had together.

  Although she had been furious with Sydney the last time they had spoken, what she felt now was gratitude. Everything Sydney had said had been the truth and it took Sydney’s anger to make her wake up and realize that for the last twenty-five years, no make that thirty-seven years, she had lived her life for everyone else.

  After her trip to the church on Christmas Eve, she had left feeling better than she had ever felt in her life. It was as if a terrible burden had been lifted from her shoulders.

  “Snap out of it girl,” she said aloud, picking up the four printouts that Sydney had selected. She thought it was ironic that the ones Sydney had chosen had also been her picks out of all the samples.

  She opened up her daily planner and made notations next to the company names that she would be using to order the fabric.

  “Good morning,” Sydney said from the doorway, her voice startling Rachel. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to sneak up on you.”

  “It’s okay,” Rachel smiled and leaned back in the chair.

  Sydney suddenly felt a little awkward, unsure of herself even. She shifted nervously from one foot to the other.

  Rachel looked at her with amusement. “You have to use the bathroom?” she laughed, her right eyebrow rising upward.

  “Uh ... no, um ... I
’ve been doing a lot of thinking over the past few weeks,” Sydney said.

  “Yeah, me, too,” Rachel said, running her hands through her hair. The sexy gesture caused Sydney’s throat to tighten. She had hoped that the time away from Rachel would lessen the desire that was steadily building inside of her with each passing day. She couldn’t have been more wrong. If anything, she wanted Rachel more than she had ever wanted anything in her life and that scared her.

  “Hello?” Rachel said, waving her hand in the air.

  Sydney shook her head as if that would erase all thoughts and feelings that threatened to overtake her. “I’m sorry, what did you say?” she asked, her face flushing slightly with embarrassment.

  “I asked you what you’ve been thinking about,” Rachel grinned.

  “I owe you an apology, Rache,” Sydney said, clasping her fingers together in front of her.

  Rachel pushed her chair back away from the table and stood up. She slowly walked over to Sydney. She pulled Sydney’s hands apart and took both of them in hers. She laughed at the shocked expression on Sydney’s face when she brought them to her mouth and gently kissed, first one palm and then the other.

  “I’m the one who owes you the apology, Sydney. What you said to me was the truth. Every single word you spoke was dead-on.”

  Sydney felt a lump rise in her throat. She shook her head back and forth adamantly. “No, Rache, I was so out of line and I had no right to be that rude to you and I’m so sorry.” Sydney looked down at the floor. She was afraid that if she looked at Rachel, she would lose it and make an even bigger fool of herself.

  “Sydney, please look at me,” Rachel said softly. When Sydney made no move to comply, Rachel gently touched her cheek. She used her hand to force Sydney to meet her gaze. What she saw in Sydney’s eyes made her heart skip a beat. It wasn’t anger, lust or desire, what she saw were years of hurt and anguish but most of all she saw love. She knew what it was because she was sure that Sydney could see the same thing when she looked in her eyes. She felt her heart ache as a lone tear fell from Sydney’s eye and ran down her cheek. She smiled as she used her thumb to wipe it off.

  “For so many years, I have denied who I was as a person. I lived my life according to how everyone else thought I should live and because of that, I missed out on you and what could have been but more importantly, I missed out on what it meant to truly be in love and to have that love returned ten-fold.”

  Sydney took a deep breath. Her mind was racing in so many directions that she felt dizzy. She had waited so many years to hear these words from Rachel. “I don’t understand.”

  “I was so angry at you when I left here. I was angry because you were right about everything,” Rachel said, caressing Sydney’s cheek with her thumb.

  “But ... but what changed your mind? What happened?” Sydney asked. Her mind was still having a hard time digesting what Rachel was saying to her. She wanted to believe her but her mind warned her to be careful.

  Rachel laughed. “I went to church.”

  Sydney’s eyebrows rose in surprise. “Did you have a spiritual awakening or something?”

  “More like a ‘Come to Jesus’ meeting,” Rachel chuckled.

  Sydney grinned at her. “Well, that must have been some kind of a meeting.”

  “It was ... very eye opening,” Rachel said, nodding her head.

  “What does it have to do with us, though?” Sydney asked.

  “I’m not really sure but I do know this,” Rachel said as she cupped Sydney’s face with both of her hands. Before Sydney could say anything, Rachel pulled Sydney’s face toward her and then their lips met with the sweetest abandon.

  The soft sensation coming from Rachel’s lips, rocked Sydney to the core. She felt the tip of Rachel’s tongue push forward and was helpless to do anything but allow her entry. She groaned as she gently caressed and sucked and massaged Rachel’s tongue with her own. She felt her knees weaken as her hands moved up and down Rachel’s sides as if they had a mind of their own.

  Rachel’s deep intake of breath was almost her undoing as her hands found their way beneath Rachel’s t-shirt, sliding over silky soft skin as they searched for their desired goal, covering her breasts. She squeezed gently, her thumbs making circular motions over Rachel’s nipples. She moaned into Rachel’s mouth as she felt them grow harder with each stroke.

  Sydney shivered when Rachel’s fingers and hands did a tap dance across her stomach. “You’re killing me,” Sydney groaned as Rachel traced kisses up and down the side of her neck. The tingling sensation ran from the tip of Sydney’s head all the way down to her groin. She felt the wetness gather between her legs when Rachel ran her tongue along the outside edge of her ear.

  “Do you have any idea how bad I want you right now?” Sydney growled as her lips made their way back to Rachel’s mouth.

  “Probably as much as I want you to want me right now,” Rachel whispered. She slowly traced the outline of Sydney’s lips with the tip of her tongue.

  The clearing of a throat caused both women to jump apart as if they had been burnt by fire. Rachel felt her cheeks redden as she jerked her shirt down.

  “Sorry to interrupt,” Edna chuckled, “but there is a delivery man out front. He says you ordered some car parts and he says he won’t leave until you’ve had a chance to inspect them.”

  “Thanks, Edna,” Sydney said as she tucked her shirt back into her pants.

  “Don’t mention it,” Edna laughed as she turned and walked away.

  Sydney turned to Rachel, pulled her into her arms, and cupped her face with her hand. “You’re still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on,” she said and then kissed Rachel softly on the lips. She looked at her one last time and then left the room.

  Chapter 11

  Rachel tapped her pencil on the desk. She hadn’t seen or talked to Sydney since ... since their what? She laughed out loud. She didn’t even know what to call what they had done yesterday. She hadn’t planned on kissing Sydney. It just happened in the heat of the moment.

  “Oh my gosh,” she whispered. “You felt her up, that’s what you did.” She felt the color rise in her cheeks at the thought of what she had done. She had no idea on where they stood or where they would go from here.

  All she knew for sure was that she had been unable to get it out of her mind and Sydney had been the last thing she thought about when she went to sleep and she had been the first thing she thought of when she had awoken that morning.

  “I think these two belong to you,” Edna said, poking her head through the doorway.

  “Hey, Mom, what’s up?” Caitlyn asked as she came into the room with Alyssa following behind her.

  Rachel frowned at the sight of her daughters. “What are you two doing here?”

  “Sorry, but I didn’t know what else to do with her,” Caitlyn said, nodding at her little sister. “Christy’s mom called my cell. Seems Christy has some kind of flu bug so I went over and picked her up. I figured Sydney wouldn’t mind if I brought Mini-me over here.”

  “You’re right. Sydney doesn’t mind at all,” Sydney said from the doorway. She walked up to Alyssa and held out her hand. “Hi, Alyssa, I’m Sydney.”

  “Hello, Sydney. I’m pleased to meet you,” Alyssa said in response and shook Sydney’s hand.

  “Well, I guess it’s settled then,” Rachel laughed.

  “I guess so,” Caitlyn chuckled. “I got a lot of work to do so I will talk to you ladies later.”

  “I will touch base with you in a little while,” Sydney said to Caitlyn.

  “Sounds good because I think I may have solved one of our little puzzles concerning a certain exec that we both know,” Caitlyn said with a wink.

  “Now you’ve got my curiosity aroused,” Sydney said.

  “I need to re-check and verify a few things but once I’m done, I’ll buzz you on your cell,” Caitlyn said.

  Sydney smiled at her and said, “Can’t wait.”

  Once Caitlyn wa
s gone, Sydney turned her attention to Alyssa. “So, Alyssa, Caitlyn tells me that she calls you Mini-me. Why is that?” she asked.

  “She says it’s because she and are just alike,” Alyssa answered.

  “Is that true?” Sydney asked.

  “Yeah in most ways, I suppose. Only she likes computers and I like cars.”

  Sydney’s eyebrows rose in surprise. “Well, if you like cars, then you might like me a little bit, too.” She glanced at Rachel and flashed her a broad smile that made Rachel’s heart skip a beat.

  “You like cars?” Alyssa asked excitedly. Sydney’s revelation had obviously pleased her.

  “I love, love, love cars,” Sydney said and then winked at Rachel.

  The small gesture caused Rachel’s breath to catch in her throat. She couldn’t take her eyes off of Sydney as she watched her interact with her youngest daughter.

  “You should see the shelves in my room, shouldn’t she, Mom?” Alyssa asked, looking at her mom for confirmation.

  “Yes, she should, baby. I think Sydney would be impressed by your model collection,” Rachel said and nodded her head for emphasis, much to Alyssa’s delight.

  “You build models?” Sydney asked, her eyebrows rising in surprise.

  “At least two a week,” Alyssa answered proudly.

  Sydney smiled at the young girl who looked so much like her mother. “I’ll tell you what, how about I take you around and show you the rest of the house so your mom can get back to work.”

  “Sweet,” Alyssa said, her face lighting up with the thought. “Is it okay?” she asked, looking at Rachel.

  “Yes, baby, it’s more than okay,” Rachel answered with a smile. She looked at Sydney and silently mouthed a thank you.”

  Sydney grinned at Rachel and then wrapped her arm around Alyssa shoulders. “Do you like video games?” she asked.

  “I love video games,” Alyssa replied.

  “What about Donkey Kong?” Sydney asked.

  “I will kick your butt,” Rachel heard Alyssa tell Sydney as the two of them headed down the hallway. She laughed and shook her head. Alyssa definitely marched to the beat of a different drummer just like her older sister.