Love Over Envy: BWWM Pregnancy Romance Novel

by Jamila Jasper

  But Victoria wasn’t quite brave enough to bail on her parents’ party, so she stuck around for a while longer. Everyone was so fake. Couples that were on the brink of divorce were pretending to be happily in love. Couples who had gone bankrupt in 2009 were dressed to the nines. Everyone there was just fake, fake, fake. Victoria had spent her whole life immersed in this culture, and she absolutely hated it. But then again, in the eyes of her parents, she seemed to hate everything.

  Victoria was trying to drown out all the noise when all of a sudden, she tuned into a conversation that was happening right behind her. Two older white people were whispering about her family. She heard the name Harvey Brooker so she knew that she wasn’t mistaken. Victoria tried to listen in more closely but as soon as she did, she regretted it.

  “Harvey Brooker…Heh. He may have money but he’s just a dumb old nigger,” the man said.

  Victoria felt her stomach turn. She couldn’t be here any longer. She fled as fast as she could to the other side of the house. I’ll just wait out back for a while, she thought to herself. This was absolutely terrible. Victoria had certainly faced her fair share of racism, being a dark-skinned woman in an all-white world, but hearing someone insult her family and call them a racial slur at their very own party was more than what Victoria could handle. Luckily, she had a trusty pack of cigarettes in her pocket. She couldn’t believe that people still thought that way. She couldn’t believe that some people could still be filled with that much hate. Her parents had worked their asses off to get this much money but there were still people who would see them as…Victoria couldn’t even think of the word. Even when singing along to rap music it left a bad taste in her mouth, and this time was no different.

  She sat on the stairs of her back porch and pulled out a single cigarette. As she fondled the cancer stick in her hand, she thought about what Craig told her the night before. She didn’t give a damn if he thought smoking was unladylike, but maybe he had a point…The cigarettes would kill her. All of a sudden, Victoria found herself unable to light the Marlboro she was holding in her hand. She took the cigarette and the rest of the pack out of her pocket and chucked them as far away from her she could throw.

  The cigarette landed a couple feet away from Craig, who was walking in her direction. He looked down to the ground and then back up at Victoria. As she noticed him, she felt her body seizing up. Really? Did she have to run into him now? Not only had she given him a blowjob the night before that she completely regretted, but he was just another white person. Craig was probably just as racist as the stupid, fake people at her parents’ party. She did not want to see him right now.

  Before Craig could open his mouth again, Victoria stopped him.

  “If you think I’m going to blow you again, you’re mistaken,” Victoria said, pouting. She couldn’t figure out why Craig always seemed amused by her anger, but he was yet again.

  “I didn’t think that at all,” Craig replied. Did he always have to have a slick answer for everything?

  “Good. It was a one-time thing and I don’t want you getting any ideas, or worse, telling my parents,” Victoria said. Her tone of voice told Craig that there was something more going on here. Sure, she probably wanted to put her foot down, but Victoria also carried a certain sadness about her that he couldn’t help but notice.

  “I won’t tell anyone a damned thing,” Craig assured her.

  “Good,” Victoria said definitively.

  “Tell me why you’re upset,” Craig demanded. He didn’t want to phrase it as a question and give Victoria any wiggle room to avoid answering.

  Victoria looked at Craig and considered whether or not she should tell him what had just happened and how she was feeling in general about her parents. If he didn’t expect anything from her, what could be the harm in opening up? It wasn’t like he knew anyone in her circle, so there was really no harm in telling him a damn thing. Plus, Victoria thought he was kind of cute. Talking to a cute guy was certainly a better deal than hanging out with a bunch of racist rich people. Craig was at least 6 feet tall. He had a broad, toned upper body with even more toned legs. He was wearing one of those ripped up white tank tops and denim. He looked like a contemporary James Dean. His hair was the color of dark chocolate, and his skin was a deep tan from spending so much time working out in the sun. He was covered in a constant thin layer of sweat, which would have been gross if it didn’t highlight his rippling muscles.

  Victoria couldn’t help but feel that opening up to him wasn’t a bad idea. And it wasn’t just because of his looks. There was something about Craig that she felt drawn to. Was it the fact that talking to him was an act of rebellion in and of itself? Perhaps. But Victoria thought that it was the soft and caring look in his eyes. He was strong and masculine in his physique, but he still had a gentle personality and a soft aura about him.

  “It’s kind of a long story. It’s a bunch of different things, I suppose,” Victoria said, looking down.

  Craig wasn’t going to let her get away that easily. “Want to elaborate?” he probed. Victoria caved in.

  “Well…As you know, my parents are throwing this huge garden party. I was wandering around looking for some of that giant shrimp when I overheard a couple of the guests talking. Not a big deal, you might think, except one of them was talking about my father. I listened in a little more closely and then I heard them calling my father a nigger,” Victoria said.

  Craig certainly hadn’t expected that. He remained quiet in hopes that Victoria would open up a little bit more.

  “You probably never think about this stuff because…You know…But for me, I think about it all the time. No matter what we do, no matter how much money my parents have, we’ll always be niggers to these people,” Victoria finished. She felt tears welling up in her eyes.

  Craig didn’t know what else to do, so he pulled her close and gave her a hug.

  Chapter 4

  These rich bastards didn't have a clue, Craig thought. But was it really just limited to the rich? Craig recalled his more humble roots. In rural Massachusetts, they hated black people even more. These white hicks said far worse than the N-word, if you could even conceptualize such a thing. Craig couldn't come down too hard on the wealthy for that when it was a problem with his race as a whole.

  As he released Victoria from his embrace he noticed the scent of her perfume again. Craig felt his cock stiffen in his pants. Uh-oh. He didn't want to give Victoria the wrong impression. While Craig wasn't turned on by Victoria's vulnerability, it did paint her in in a far better light than when he had first met her.

  Craig was starting to feel like Victoria wasn't just a massive brat. Perhaps that entire bitchy act was a veneer to protect the vulnerable girl beneath it all. He liked this Victoria a little bit better, although he did have to admit "bitchy" Victoria was hilarious and gave some damned good head.

  "Do you want to just sit and talk for a bit?" Craig asked her. Sure he had some work to do but he could always finish it up in a bit. Victoria seemed really hurt and he needed to make sure she was okay first.

  "Talking would be nice," Victoria admitted. She couldn't believe she was actually going to have a deep conversation with her gardener. Am I that lonely? Victoria wondered. Victoria was that lonely. Sure, her best friends were great for bitching, venting and gossip, but did they really have any substance? It was odd, but Victoria felt like she could be real with Craig. There was just something about him that inspired her to dig a little deeper. Heck, Victoria had been half-heartedly trying to quit cigarettes, and this was the first time in a while she had turned one down. That in itself was an amazing feat.

  Victoria and Craig sat down on the back steps. Victoria was gazing longingly at her pack of cigarettes lying on the ground. Craig noticed and snapped her out of it. A distraction would take her away from her addiction at least momentarily.

  "So...What is it you want out of life, Miss Brooker?" Craig asked her.

  "I don't know," Victoria answered honestl
y. She wondered if Craig would judge her answer. He probably thinks I'm a vapid idiot, Victoria thought to herself. She was wrong though, Craig actually understood her. He knew he was one of the lucky few who had figured out his path in life early. But no one close to him had seemed to share his luck. Craig was friends with his fair share of wanderers. He didn't expect Victoria to have it all together, especially considering the life she had.

  "You don't have to have everything figured out," Craig tried to comfort her. It didn't work well.

  "I don't feel like I do...My parents have me trapped here. At first I thought I was getting the deal of a lifetime. Everything has always been free. Now I'm 25 with no credit, no money of my own, and I have a degree in art history. I have no skills, and I don't know how to work. Some of my friends are proud of that, but honestly, I only feel ashamed," Victoria confessed.

  She felt like she was going to tear up again. Victoria didn't know how it was happening, but she was confessing all her deep secrets to Craig. These were the fears and insecurities that kept her up at night. Victoria acted tough, and she was bold in some ways: bold enough to give her older white gardener a blowjob. But in other ways she felt stunted. She wasn't bold enough to try to get a job without connections. She wasn't bold enough to move out. She wasn't bold enough to do a damn thing to defy mommy and daddy.

  Craig was starting to learn more about this African American princess than he had ever anticipated. He was starting to understand the "real" Victoria Brooker who had obviously been hiding for a very long time.

  "I understand why you feel trapped. You know Victoria, you seem like a girl filled with doubts and insecurities. I bet you're capable of far more than you can imagine. I can tell...You have that fire in your eyes that tells me you can do great things," Craig said.

  When he was done talking, he locked eyes with Victoria. She was staring at him, her eyes blazed with desire. Really? Craig was becoming privy to a different type of fire...

  Victoria's mind was racing a million miles a minute. Craig's kind words brought her back to the night before when she had given him a blowjob on a whim. Is it still slutty if I know him better now? Victoria thought. Now that she knew Craig a little bit better, Victoria was getting tempted to act on her obvious attraction to him. She couldn't figure out what exactly was drawing her to Craig. His body? His kind words? The way he seemed to draw her out of her shell?

  Whatever it was, Victoria was soon overcome by the powerful desire to suck Craig off again. A little reward for being a good listener...

  As Craig tried to figure out what exactly that impish expression on her face meant, Victoria leaned in and kissed him. Craig shouldn't have been as surprised as he was. She had said no repeats of the day before, but then she had promptly opened up to him in an intimate way. Victoria could be fickle.

  Victoria kissed Craig, pushing her tongue into his mouth. Then she placed her hand on his cock on the outside of his grimy gardening jeans. Craig was wearing his ripped work pants and a muscle tee that stretched taut around his rippling biceps. He looked sexier without the haze of alcohol. Victoria knew that was rare...Most of her pasty prep school and college peers looked far better after six vodka cranberry drinks.

  She got off her step and positioned herself between Craig's legs yet again. Victoria couldn't wait to wow him a second time. She wasn't one of these girls who became less passionate the more she sucked cock. It was Victoria's sole way of expressing intimacy considering she had never made love before.

  Victoria didn't take her eyes off Craig as she unzipped his pants and released the monster cock he was packing. In the daylight, and being quite sober, it looked different to Victoria. There was just something about seeing a fat, erect dick in broad daylight that made her feel something primal and nasty. She was practically salivating with desire.

  Victoria began to gingerly lick the tip of Craig's cock. From the instant her tongue made contact with his bulging strawberry cock head, precum oozed out. Victoria lapped it up eagerly. She continued to focus all her attention on lapping around the tip. She knew it would drive him wild and before long he would be bucking and begging for her to swallow the entire length deep down her throat.

  Within a few moments, Victoria's prediction came true. She slobbered over Craig's dickhead until he went wild. First he grabbed onto her hair, careful not to manhandle her braids, and he tried to direct her mouth further down his shaft. Victoria resisted. She placed her hands on his hip flexors and continued to drive him wild. Victoria teased him, taking just a little bit more of his length down her throat, but then she would pull back after a second or two.

  Just when Craig thought he was going to go crazy and his cock was stiffer than a board, Victoria shoved his entire length down her throat. Craig groaned as he felt the tip of his cock slide past her palate and touch her tonsils. Victoria didn't groan or flinch. She held him there and then looked into his eyes. That last lingering look sent a shiver down Craig's spine. He was on edge and about to burst. His skin prickled into goosebumps with the anticipation. Victoria bobbed her head up and down his length, letting his entire dick slide in and out of her mouth. She knew she wouldn't be doing this for very long. Victoria used her hand to massage Craig's balls as she sucked him off.

  That was all it took. Craig grunted as he released in Victoria's mouth a second time. His skin was on fire; his dick twitched two or three more times. Victoria caught every last drop of Craig's seed in her mouth. She swallowed the hot sticky cum without complaint. Craig obviously had a good diet because his semen had the strong flavor of pineapple juice. Once Victoria was done, she returned to her seat next to Craig as he hurried to shove his dick back into his pants. They were in broad daylight, after all.

  Craig wasn't sure he understood exactly why this had happened. Or what had happened. What was going on between him and this girl? She obviously wasn't trying to use him for sex, otherwise she wouldn't keep giving him blowjobs without demanding anything in return. Craig couldn't figure out what was compelling Victoria to get between his knees not once, but twice. He couldn't say that he minded, either...

  Once they had put themselves back together, Craig asked her, "I thought you said this couldn't happen again."

  Victoria glared at him. "It can't happen again and it didn't," she replied.

  Craig was amused by her again. Victoria, on the other hand, was not amused at all. She couldn't figure out what it was about this guy that attracted her so effectively. He was poor, dirty more often than not, and he was white. He was the very last person Victoria's parents would approve of her dating. And their approval meant everything considering they controlled her access to money, something they were more than willing to hold over her head. Craig just roped her in. Maybe it was his body, or maybe it was the fact that he was the only person who had ever listened to her. He wasn't vapid like Rachel or Tiffany. He was a real person who understood there could be more to life than mansions and partying.

  Victoria leaned in and pressed her lips against Craig's. She was so soft and delicate, even if moments before he had his dick shoved down her throat. He loved the way her lips felt against his and how she was bold enough to initiate kiss after kiss. Craig didn't question why. He liked Victoria. Even if he knew this could cost him his job, if she was willing to take that slight risk, so was he.

  Victoria finally pulled away and looked up at Craig again. Their meaningful gaze was interrupted by the sound of heels clicking down the cobblestone path to the back of the house. Victoria would recognize the haunting sound of June Brooker's footsteps anywhere. Craig jumped to his feet but it was too late. June Brooker rounded the corner and stood with arms folded just a few feet away from them. Despite her smile, Victoria knew she was pissed off.

  "Victoria, dear. May I please have a word with you?" Her mother asked. Her icy tone confirmed what Victoria suspected.

  "Yes, Mother," Victoria answered. She didn't say goodbye to Craig. He took the hint and disappeared back to his work. As Craig walked away, Victor
ia stared at him wistfully. She didn't want him to leave quite then; she was enjoying their conversation. But Victoria didn’t want to make things worse with her mother. She couldn’t believe that she was being treated like this at twenty-five years old. It was absolutely ridiculous. Victoria followed her mother as she sauntered through the back door into the house.

  June turned to her daughter and said, “Dear…Victoria…Is there a particular reason you are consorting with our gardener?”

  Victoria hated when her mother put on the fake, snooty voice she used to discipline her.

  “I wasn’t consorting with anyone,” Victoria said. She tried her best to keep her face and tone neutral. She didn’t want to bring out her mother’s more aggressive side by being disrespectful.

  June raised her eyebrow and began her lecture. “Victoria. I saw you consorting with the help. Now I don’t want to get crass here but I think you’ve really pushed my hand. This man is white trash through and through. Bless his heart, Mister Stewart is a great gardener but he is financially troubled. You have no business even speaking with a man like that beyond a simple ‘good morning.’ Your father and I have worked hard to give you everything in life. We transcended the racist south and the racist north to build this fortune. Please don’t squander your youth on impoverished degenerates,” June said.