He laughed. That was his mother for you. “Of course.”
“But you’re really doing okay?”
“I am,” he assured her. “Let me look into flights, and I’ll let you know.”
“Okay, honey. Like I said, whenever you want me there, I’m there.”
“Thanks, Ma. I love you.”
“Love you, too, Seggy. I need to find my other jersey. The home jersey,” she said, but Seg knew she was talking to herself. “I can’t wear this one to a home game. Hmm.”
“Ma, I’m going to let you go now.”
“All right, Seggy. Love you. Talk to you soon.”
Seg hung up the phone and pulled up his text message app.
WHEN CAM AND GANNON LEFT, Roan bathed Liam, got him dressed for bed, then offered him a little bit of the infant cereal the doctor recommended they try out. The kid was a healthy eater, that was for sure. However, Roan decided they’d do the bath after dinner in the future since his boy was also a messy eater.
Once he’d cleaned Liam up for a second time, Roan changed him, then put him in his bed. The boy would probably sleep for several hours. He usually did after spending any amount of time with Cam. The guy spent so much time entertaining Liam it was a wonder how neither of them fell asleep where they sat.
Since the day Cam had found out about Liam, and Roan had come out to the rest of his friends, everyone seemed infatuated with the little boy. Not that Roan could blame them. Liam was the cutest kid ever. He liked that Liam would get to grow up with so much love around him. Between Cam and Gannon, Dare and Noah, Hudson and Teague, and Milly and AJ, the kid was set.
Roan’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out, glancing at the screen.
The smile on his face was instant and automatic.
Hockey boy: Love the pic. Thank you for that.
Roan had entered Seg’s name initially but changed it to hockey boy for one reason only. To protect Seg. Although he didn’t want to live his life hiding, Roan would do what he needed in order to keep Seg’s career safe. If the man decided to come out publicly, it would be his choice, not because Roan fucked anything up for him.
Roan: I wish I could say Liam watched the whole game.
Hockey boy: The bigger question is, did you watch?
Roan: Of course. Not an easy feat when my friends kept eyeing me every time you came on the screen.
Hockey boy: I take it they’ve figured us out.
Roan: They won’t say anything.
Hockey boy: I’m actually smiling, Roan. I’m not worried. It’s not the people close to you that I’m worried about.
Roan: I get it.
Hockey boy: Do you?
Roan: Yeah. I do.
Hockey boy: I’ve invited my mother to come to Texas. I want to tell her in person. I think it’s time to let her know the truth. She knows me too well. She knows something’s different.
Even now, a grown man with a child, Roan could admit to a certain insecurity when it came to trusting that people wouldn’t react badly. He’d learned long ago that just because someone claimed to love you didn’t necessarily ring true when it came to certain things.
Roan couldn’t deny the fear that trembled beneath his skin. He remembered coming out to his parents. The way his mother blew a gasket, the way his father sat there, staring at him like he couldn’t have possibly heard him correctly. Although his mother hated him after that and his father acted indifferent, Roan didn’t regret telling them. As a teenager, it had been a weight on his shoulders that threatened to tear him down. He couldn’t imagine having lived his entire life in the dark.
Roan: How do you think she’ll take it?
Hockey boy: To tell you the truth, I don’t know. But my mother’s love has always been unconditional. That’s why I want to give her the respect she deserves and tell her before she hears it from someone else.
Roan: Someone else? You’ve told others?
Hockey boy: No. But I’m scared I won’t hide it well. I don’t want to hide you, Roan. Not from anyone. If it gets out, that’s on me. I think I’m going to talk to Phoenix. Get his perspective.
Roan: The owner? The one who’s bisexual?
Hockey boy: Yeah. He’s not in a position to pass judgment. Doesn’t mean he’ll think it’s a good idea.
Roan: I get it.
He did get it. Roan understood the sports world. He knew there were a few professional athletes who had come out of the closet. Since he never heard much after the fact, he didn’t know if that was because they’d disappeared or if they’d managed to go about their normal lives because people were willing to overlook it. Not everyone, of course. Roan wasn’t naïve. Although he lived in a fairly sheltered world where being out was okay—his friends were all out—Roan knew it wasn’t that easy for everyone.
Hell, it hadn’t been easy for him. There were times he hated himself because of what his mother had done. The fact that she packed her shit and abandoned the family, blaming him solely, had hurt more than he was willing to admit. But that was a lifetime ago, and he’d since come to terms with it.
Mostly.
Roan: I’m here, whatever you need.
Hockey boy: I need you, Roan. That’s what I need.
Roan felt heat swamp him. He wasn’t sure Seg’s statement was a sexual one, but that didn’t stop his body from coming to life. If he allowed himself to think about it, he knew he missed Seg. He wanted to see him, to spend time with him, to watch him hold Liam and smile the way he had the first time. This was new for him. But he wasn’t running from it.
Roan: I’m here. Right where you left me. Waiting for you.
Hockey boy: You’re torturing me and you don’t even know it.
Roan: I assume you mean that in a good way.
Hockey boy: Having your dick rock hard isn’t necessarily a good way to spend the evening when you’ve got a roommate.
Roan: Well, we’ll have to do something about that when you get back.
Hockey boy: You’re going to be the death of me, Roan.
Roan: One hell of a way to go.
Hockey boy: You’re telling me.
Roan stared at his phone, realizing he was still smiling. A long time ago, Cam had told Roan that one day a man was going to come out of the blue and blindside him. Cam had assured him that he wouldn’t know what hit him.
He’d been right.
Sixteen
USUALLY, WHEN SEG GOT BACK home, he didn’t want to go anywhere at all. He enjoyed being at his house, liked the solitude that it afforded him. Today … not so much. The instant his feet were back on Texas soil, there’d been a strange push-pull in his body. He wanted to see Roan. He’d go so far as to say he needed to see him.
Which was the reason he was pulling up to the marina now. When he’d texted Roan to find out what his plans were for the night, Roan had informed him he was working today. Seg had gone home, packed a bag, and hopped back in his Range Rover.
After parking in the lot, Seg climbed out and looked around. He liked this place, had the first time he’d come here back when the team had scheduled an outing. There was a peacefulness that could be found here, one Seg had enjoyed immensely.
Of course, that inner peace was at war with the rioting lust that consumed him, so today was one of those days he couldn’t appreciate it as much. Unlike the last time, he wasn’t here for the scenery.
Granted, the day they’d done the team outing, Seg hadn’t had the chance to talk to Roan, but he’d gotten a glimpse of the man. At the time, he’d thought it was his overactive imagination playing tricks on him. Of course, Roan had been running back then and he’d left the marina. Seg knew now that was because he’d shown up.
He hoped like hell Roan wasn’t going to do any more running anytime soon. The past year and a half had been hell. Wanting something he knew he’d never have again wasn’t easy to deal with. And when he’d run into Roan again at the rink, Seg’s entire world had been turned upside down. He believed everything happened for a
reason, and seeing Roan that day told him that the man was supposed to be in his life.
As for what the future held for them, he didn’t have a clue. But he was more than willing to stick around and find out.
“Hey, man,” Dare greeted when Seg stepped into the small office. “What brings you to the slums?”
The man’s smile was infectious and Seg laughed. “Oh, you know … carrying around the golden hockey stick gets tiring.”
Dare’s grin widened. “Well, take a load off. We can certainly put you to work.”
“Yeah?”
“No, not really,” Dare admitted, leaning his elbows on the counter that separated them. “We’re slow right now. Will be for another couple of months. Good for us though. We’re all getting to take some time off. Which means…”
Dare disappeared, bending down behind the counter.
When he stood up, he was holding Liam in his arms.
Seg smiled so wide he thought his face might split. “There’s the little guy.”
It wasn’t until the words were out of his mouth that he realized how he sounded. Yes, he and Roan had gotten closer recently, but he wasn’t sure whether Roan had let his friends in on that secret or not.
“Your turn,” Dare said, lifting Liam up so that Seg could take him.
“Gladly,” he stated, reaching to take Liam and turning him so he could look at Liam while Liam’s feet pressed against the countertop. Liam’s little knees buckled, but then he pushed up, bouncing slightly. Seg laughed. “Ready to start skating already, eh?”
Liam’s fist flew out, his hand reaching for Seg’s nose, and he smiled, filling Seg’s heart instantly. God, he could get used to this.
The back door opened with a squeak, and Seg looked up to see Roan coming inside. The man didn’t actually smile—his lips didn’t really move—but Seg noticed his change of expression. He seemed happy to see him. Seg would take that as a win.
“Hey,” Roan greeted, glancing between Seg and Dare. “Didn’t know you were gonna stop by. What time is it?”
“Time for y’all to go do somethin’ fun,” Dare noted. “I’ve got this for another hour.”
“You sure?” Roan glanced at Dare.
Seg watched the two of them, and it wasn’t hard to notice the way Dare urged Roan with his eyes. It was almost laughable how obvious he was being.
“Positive. Now get.” Dare leaned down again. “But take this with you.”
When he stood, he was holding Liam’s car seat. Well, that explained why Liam had been on the floor.
“Don’t have to tell me twice,” Roan said, grabbing the car seat.
Seg continued to stare at Roan. He’d only been away from the man for a week, yet it felt like an eternity. He wasn’t sure why he was this infatuated, but he was. He really was.
“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” Dare called out as they turned for the door.
Seg reached over and took the blanket from the car seat, tossing it over Liam, which made the little boy giggle. The temperatures in Texas weren’t anything like up north, but it was chilly.
“Where to?” Seg asked when they reached Roan’s truck.
He waited while Roan secured the car seat in the back seat. Once that was done, Seg situated Liam in it and watched while Roan fastened the buckles over him.
“Have you eaten yet?” Roan asked.
“No.”
“I can cook dinner. If that’s okay with you.”
“It’s more than okay with me.” Seg had the overwhelming urge to kiss this man, right here in the open, but he managed to hold himself back. He was going to have to pay attention to stuff like that, because when it came to Roan, Seg lost all sense of decorum. It had never been an issue for him before.
“Follow me?”
Seg nodded, then touched Roan’s hand briefly before turning toward his SUV.
SEEING SEG STANDING IN THE marina office, holding Liam in his arms…
Admittedly, Roan had never in his life felt the sort of emotions that had risen inside him the moment his brain processed what was going on. And to think, he’d spent so long running and hiding because he didn’t want to burden anyone, when in reality the people in his life wanted to be there for him.
Of course, he thought about that often. Thought about how he’d pushed everyone away, making assumptions that shouldn’t have been made. Yes, he’d been trying to protect his friends, not wanting them to endure the hell Roan had endured with Cassie. He also wondered whether or not things would be different if he’d been open about what was going on. Would Cassie still be alive? Would Seg be in his life?
As for Seg, it wasn’t like Roan knew that would be the case though. It was merely a godsend, something Roan found himself giddy about.
Giddy.
Wow.
He knew for a fact he’d never used that word to describe himself or how he was feeling. Not ever. Yet he couldn’t deny it now as he pulled into the driveway of his house, Seg’s gleaming black SUV pulling in beside him.
Roan took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. He needed to chill. No way was he going to jump headfirst into something that might get him hurt. Or worse, get Liam hurt. The last thing Roan wanted was to get attached to someone who might not stick around. However, he refused to assume the worst. For the first time in what felt like forever—not counting Liam, of course—Roan had something to look forward to. Someone. He damn sure wasn’t going to project his fears on their relationship.
“One day at a time,” he mumbled to himself as he turned off the engine and climbed out of the truck.
Seg was instantly at the back passenger door, opening it for him. Roan released the car seat from the base and hefted Liam out of the truck. It didn’t surprise him that the little boy had fallen asleep during the short drive home. He’d spent the better part of the day with Dare. That in itself would tire anyone out.
“Lemme get him changed, and I’ll get dinner started,” Roan told Seg as he headed toward Liam’s bedroom.
“Or I could do one or the other for you,” Seg suggested, closing the door behind him.
Roan stopped and turned, took several steps back, closing in on the sexy hockey player. He couldn’t help himself. Roan reached for Seg’s head, pulling him down for a quick kiss. Of course, quick didn’t play into the equation once their lips touched. It felt right, being here with Seg and Liam.
“God, I missed you,” Seg whispered, cupping Roan’s head.
Roan’s insides went haywire at those words. He already knew he was in serious trouble when it came to this man.
Knowing Liam couldn’t take care of himself, Roan managed to pull away and headed right for Liam’s room. He changed him quickly, which awakened the sleepy baby. Grinning like a fool, Roan lifted him into his arms. It was Liam’s dinner time, as well, which meant he’d probably be back asleep in the next fifteen minutes. If Seg wanted to spend time with the baby, he would have to do so now.
When Roan returned to the kitchen, Seg was standing there, staring into the refrigerator. He turned and Roan held Liam out to him. The look on the man’s face was pure adoration, and once again, Roan’s heart did a flip in his chest.
“Hey, little guy,” Seg said softly. “You up for some dinner, too?”
Roan got the bottle ready, then handed it over to Seg. While the two of them went into the living room, he got to work, pulling things out of the fridge.
Half an hour later, Seg had put Liam in his bed, and Roan had chicken Alfredo spooned onto plates.
“So, what’s it like being on the road?” Roan probed, curious as to the life of a hockey player.
“It’s not glamorous, that’s for sure,” Seg told him, picking up his fork. “Not when you consider all the gear that has to be taken as well as all of the assistance that’s needed to haul it.”
Roan smiled. “So, not the lifestyle of the rich and famous travel? No jets with leather seats and cocktail bars?”
Seg chewed before responding. “Unfortunately, n
o. Lots of sweaty guys who were tired on the last trip and hadn’t yet caught up on sleep.”
“You mentioned you had a roommate?”
“Yeah.” Seg picked up his water glass. “Cullen Crosby. Nice guy. Quiet. Keeps to himself mostly and doesn’t spend much time in the room.”
“That probably helps.”
Seg grinned. “I sleep like the dead, so I never know when he’s coming or going.”
“Funny, you don’t sleep all that much when I’m with you.”
Seg’s eyes heated. “That’s because I’ve got more important things to do than sleep.”
When they were finished, Seg insisted on cleaning up, which again surprised Roan. He didn’t argue, simply carried their dishes from the table to the sink while Seg rinsed them and stuck them in the dishwasher. Once all the domestic duties were handled, Roan’s nerves began to riot. As though he hadn’t been intimate with this man plenty of times already.
Naturally, he didn’t get a lot of time to dwell on anything, because Seg was right there, invading his personal space, pulling him in close, and crushing their mouths together.
Roan grabbed Seg’s shirt, jerking him closer, giving in to the overwhelming desire that’d been on a slow simmer inside him since he first saw Seg in the marina office. He took them both down to the couch, landing on top of Seg before rolling to the side, keeping one leg over Seg’s thigh. Hands were everywhere, touching, holding, trying to get closer, but still it wasn’t enough.
Finally, needing to take a breath, Roan lifted his head and stared down at the blond man who looked so damn good laid out beneath him. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me, too.” Seg’s hand trailed down Roan’s face.
It was a gentle move that had Roan’s body doing strange things. He liked that Seg was so loving. It wasn’t all about domination. About hard and fast and no holds barred. It was as though Seg could see deep into his soul, knew what Roan needed, the assurance he sought.
He couldn’t resist kissing him again, but this time, Roan reduced the rapid boil to a slow simmer once again, wanting this to last forever. He’d never been the type to make out on the couch, but he was good with this. Sure, he wanted more. He wanted to strip Seg down to nothing but sleek, warm skin and ravish him from head to toe, but this worked, too.
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