Or it had. For about ten minutes. At that point, Roan’s dick was so fucking hard it hurt. He needed more.
A lot more.
Seventeen
SEG NOTICED THE SUBTLE SHIFT in the air around him. The way Roan went from pliant to hard in an instant. The man was holding back, that was obvious. Seg liked that he could, but yeah, after a solid week of being away from Roan, he was ready to eat him alive.
Somehow—though he wasn’t sure exactly how it happened—their clothes finally disappeared, strewn across the floor around them while they remained on the couch, Roan still atop him. Seg didn’t want to let him go, didn’t want to stop touching, stop kissing. The warmth of his body was a welcoming comfort he hadn’t realized he’d needed until now. It was like he could feel for the first time in his life. Well, it was like that every time he was with Roan really. There was tremendous pressure inside him, a need that continued to gain strength with every passing second.
“Don’t move,” Roan groaned.
Seg released him when Roan pulled away, getting to his feet and padding naked down the hall. He returned a second later with a condom and lube, making Seg smile. Glad it’d been Roan who had to temporarily pull the plug. Had it been Seg, he wouldn’t have had the strength to get up.
When Roan was near him again, Seg pulled him down, sliding his hands over Roan’s back, his ass, his thighs. He pulled him closer, never getting as close as he wanted though.
He could feel Roan’s hand working between them. He didn’t pay enough attention but figured Roan was suiting up, ready to get on with the program. Seg was on board with that plan.
When Roan kneed his legs apart, then propped Seg’s left leg over his forearm, he knew what was coming. He pulled back enough to watch as Roan guided his cock to Seg’s tight entrance.
“Not sure how easy I can be this time.” Roan’s admittance sounded more like a warning.
Seg nodded, completely entranced by the sight of Roan guiding himself home.
Several minutes later, while their bodies were pressed together, hands still groping, Roan was finally lodged balls deep inside him. The pain warred with pleasure, merging into something potent, something that ripped at Seg’s resolve. This was too good.
“Okay?” Roan whispered, nipping Seg’s bottom lip.
“Oh, yeah.” He was better than okay.
“Relax for me.”
Seg nodded, trying his best.
Roan lifted Seg’s other leg, propping it on the couch cushion, changing the angle of penetration. Seg was stretched painfully tight, unsure how long he could take Roan not moving inside him. When Roan finally did begin to shift his hips, Seg released the breath he’d been holding, grabbing Roan’s hair and pulling his mouth back down to his.
The slow thrust and retreat sent chills through him until, finally, Seg was overcome with sensation. Pure, brutal ecstasy raced beneath his skin. It fired up every nerve, every molecule, until he was trembling from the overwhelming, mind-numbing intensity.
When Roan fucked him, Seg felt more than the physical aspect of it. He was overcome with emotion, driven by a hard need to be one with this man. It’d been that way since the first time, and Seg knew without a doubt he’d never find that with anyone else.
“Gonna fuck you hard now,” Roan told him, burying his face in Seg’s neck. “But don’t wanna hurt you.”
“You won’t hurt me.” Reaching around, Seg gripped Roan’s ass, jerking him forward, taking him as deep as he could. Roan groaned, then lifted his head, propping his upper body up with his hands beside Seg’s head.
The next few minutes were exquisite torture as Roan pounded him over and over, deeper, faster, harder. Even when they were both coated in a fine sheen of sweat, the man didn’t stop. Seg accepted every punishing thrust, his cock throbbing, untouched between them. No way could he stem his release; it barreled down on him, surprising in its intensity.
“Roan…” He groaned, bucking his hips, his cock jerking as he came hard. So hard it stole his breath.
“Son of a bitch,” Roan yelled, his hips slamming down one last time. “Fuck, yes. Ahhh!”
Roan’s mouth was on his once more. Seg forced his heartbeat to slow, stroking his hands over Roan’s back. “That was quite possibly the hardest I’ve ever come in my life.”
“Yeah?” Roan’s head was buried in his neck. “I know the feeling. Not sure I can walk.”
“That’s cool. I’m good. Right where you are.”
ROAN WASN’T KIDDING WHEN HE said he didn’t think he could walk. He was completely wiped after that mind-blowing orgasm. Seriously. Maybe they should work themselves up to sex next time Seg was away for any length of time.
The thought of there being a next time relaxed him. Roan had the ability to get into his own head, to make things more difficult than necessary, but that wasn’t the case. He didn’t want that with Seg. Whatever it was, he was content with it. With this.
After a few minutes, Roan finally managed to make his way to the bathroom to clean up. He then went to the kitchen while Seg disappeared to do the same. He pulled a box of brownie mix along with the necessary ingredients and pans to make it out of the cabinet and was setting the oven to preheat when Seg returned.
“What are you doing?”
Roan grinned. “I’m not doin’ anything, but I specifically recall you mentioning you make mean brownies. I want brownies.”
Seg came up behind him, hugging him close to his body. “I’ll make you brownies, but only if I get to lick the remaining batter off your body later.”
“Well, you drive a hard bargain, but okay.” Roan stepped around the small bar and took a seat on a stool, watching Seg work. “So, any news on when your mother’s comin’ down?”
Seg met his eyes. “She gets here Wednesday, the twenty-fifth. She’ll be here until the fourth of February.”
Roan nodded. He wasn’t sure he could go that long without seeing Seg. However, it seemed incredibly selfish to mention that.
“Why the frown? I haven’t made them yet,” Seg stated, nodding toward the bowl of batter.
Forcing a smile, Roan lifted his head. “Not frowning.”
“Scared to meet my mother?”
Okay, now he really was frowning. “You want me to meet your mother?”
“I would, yes.” Seg stared into his eyes, holding his gaze. “Unless you have something against that.”
“No,” Roan blurted. Surprisingly, he really didn’t.
“I’m planning to sit down and talk to her. If all goes well, which I have no reason to believe it won’t, I’d like to introduce her to you and Liam.”
Now it felt as though they were moving a little too fast. Roan fought the urge to panic.
“Settle down,” Seg said, his voice soft. He was standing directly beside Roan, his hand instantly going under his chin, forcing Roan to look up at him. “I’m not asking for more than you can give. If this isn’t the right time, say so.”
Roan swallowed hard but didn’t say anything. He continued to get lost in Seg’s steel-blue eyes, in the warmth he saw there. This man was for real, which was quite possibly what scared him most.
“Tell me,” Seg insisted.
“No, it’s just—” Roan leaned up and kissed Seg, unable to resist. “I’m good. I’d be honored to meet your mother. And if something changes, if you don’t want to introduce us, I understand.”
Seg kissed him back, cupping his face and swiping his thumb down Roan’s cheek. The gentleness in the man’s touch was so different than what he’d expected. Here was this formidable badass hockey player who took hits that most men couldn’t handle, and he was being so sweet.
“Thank you.”
Roan looked up, his confusion obviously showing. “For what?”
“For being at that bar that night, for showing back up out of the blue at the rink, for being on my doorstep when I least expected it, for … for everything.”
“You make it damn near impossible to resist you, you kn
ow that?” Roan chuckled.
“That’s my plan.”
“Yeah, well, it’s working.” Roan had never admitted something quite that truthful in his life. Something that made him feel so vulnerable.
Yet the look on Seg’s face didn’t reflect an ounce of arrogance.
“You about done with those brownies?” Roan asked, changing the subject. “I’m waiting to get on to the brownie batter portion of tonight’s entertainment.”
“Oh, we’ll get there.”
Roan couldn’t wait.
Eighteen
Wednesday, January 25th
SEG WAS AT THE AIRPORT late Wednesday night when his mother’s plane arrived. The minute he saw her coming down the escalator toward him, his spirits lifted. The woman would never cease to amaze him. Although he knew it’d been a long day for her, she was still smiling, greeting him with a hug and a kiss before he grabbed her suitcases and walked her to the Range Rover.
“Tell me what you did today, Seggy,” his mother prompted as he pulled out of the airport and onto the highway.
“I went shopping,” he informed her.
“Grocery shopping?” She grinned.
“That, too.”
“Really?”
Seg cast a quick look her way. “Of course. You sent me a list, remember?”
His mother giggled. “What else did you shop for?”
Feeling his face heat, Seg remembered the kind woman at the baby store who had helped him locate all the things he was searching for. This thing with Roan was permanent. Maybe they hadn’t quite talked about it completely, but as far as Seg was concerned, Roan and Liam were it for him. Hence the reason he went in search of a car seat, portable crib, and books. Lots of books on all things baby.
Rather than tell his mother that, he grinned. “Just things.” Knowing he had piqued her curiosity, he opted to change the subject. “How about Mexican food?”
“Oh, heavens yes. That sounds perfect right about now.”
She leaned her head back and closed her eyes for a minute and Seg drove.
The drive back into Austin didn’t take long, even after they’d stopped for dinner at a little Tex-Mex place his mother loved to visit when she was in town. Now that they were at his house, Seg’s nerves were beginning to unsettle, and he found himself pacing his kitchen while she put her things away.
When she appeared in the doorway, he forced himself to stop moving.
“Okay,” she said, her tone serious. “Let’s talk. Spit it out, Seggy. I know there’s something on your mind, and you’re not that great at small talk.”
He smiled despite his nerves. The woman knew him too well. And true, he’d probably used up all his small talk during dinner, which admittedly hadn’t been much. They could only talk about the weather for so long.
“Wine?” he offered.
“Does anyone ever say no to wine?”
“I do,” he admitted.
“You don’t count.”
Seg poured her a glass of wine, then led the way to the living room, urging her onto the couch. He fought the urge to pace and forced his ass onto a cushion nearby.
“What is it?” It was clear she wasn’t going to be happy until he told her what had him so worked up.
“I met someone.” That was the easy part of the conversation, he knew.
“I assume it’s serious since you meet a lot of someones yet you never mention them to me.”
“It’s serious.”
She nodded, watching him closely.
Seg took a deep breath. “I’m not sure how to say this because I’m just getting used to it myself.” He wrung his hands in his lap, then lifted his gaze and met hers head on. “I’m gay, Ma.”
Debra Seguine didn’t move a muscle. She didn’t appear shocked or outraged. There was no disgust or disdain etched on her aging face. And yes, he looked. He was searching for any nuance that would give away her initial thoughts. Somehow, she masked her expression perfectly. That or she wasn’t at all surprised. In fact, his mother looked the same as she always did when he told her anything important. She was processing the information, likely coming up with a dozen questions.
“I assume this isn’t something you recently figured out.”
“Not really, no. I’ve had my suspicions.”
“You and me both,” she said, a smile curling the corner of her mouth.
Seg lifted an eyebrow.
“Oh, come on. You’ve dated supermodels, honey. And not one of them has ever managed to truly catch your eye. It’s not a total shocker.”
It was to him. Kind of. “Do you have any questions?”
His mother smiled. “Who’s the lucky man who brought my boy out of the darkness and into the light?”
Funny that her words were actually how he felt. He’d spent his life pretending to be someone he wasn’t, hiding from everyone, including himself. Now that he was out with himself, he felt free. “His name’s Roan.”
She nodded again.
“He’s got a son,” Seg explained. “Liam. He’s four and a half months old. He was Roan’s sister’s son, but she died a couple of months ago. Drug overdose.” He frowned, hating to think of the pain Roan had gone through.
“Tell me about them,” she prompted. “The baby. He’s okay?”
Seg nodded. “Liam’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen, Ma. He’s growing like a weed. Roan said the doctor is impressed with his progress.”
“And Roan? How old is he? Has he ever been married?”
“Never married,” Seg told her. “And he’s great. He’s thirty-four, owns a marina with three of his friends.”
“A marina? Like boats?”
“Yes. Boats. Coincidentally, the team went there about a year ago.”
“Is that where you met him?”
Seg felt the blush creep up his face. “No.”
This time her smile lit up her entire face. “Oh, Seggy. I’m so happy for you.”
“Really? You’re not freaked out? Disappointed?”
Her eyebrows darted downward. “Not once in your life have I ever been disappointed in you. Why would I be now? We’re talking about love here, Colton. Not winning or losing a hockey game. You’re a smart man, always have been. I don’t think you’ve ever done anything lightly, and I know that if you’re having this conversation with me, this is real for you. I love you. You. Not the image of you I want to project, not a fictitious version of what someone believes a son should be. From the moment you came screaming into this world, you have been my heart. And I’m truly happy for you.”
His mother always knew just what to say to set his world right again.
Seg swallowed hard. “Thank you. That means … a lot. And I love you, too.”
“Now for the harder question.” Her smile slipped away. “Are you planning to come out publicly?” She held up her hand to stop him. “Now, wait before you answer that. I want you to know that I don’t feel strongly one way or the other. I’m simply asking. So I can support you regardless. But you and I both know that not everyone is supportive. However, I know that Mr. Pierce is married to a man and a woman.” She waved her hand. “In theory or whatever.”
“He is. And I’m planning to talk to him. Right now, I’m taking this slowly. Roan knows how I feel. Knows that I can’t come out right now. Maybe not ever.”
Seg continued to watch her.
“But Ma, I don’t want to hide him. That’s my problem, I think. I don’t want to hide what this is. I’ve never felt anything like this before. He’ll think it’s too soon, but Ma, I want to ask the man to marry me. I want to spend my life with him. And no, we haven’t been seeing each other for long. Not like this. I’ve known him for a year and a half and I think … I think I fell for him the very first day I met him. Yes, even as I say it, I know it sounds ridiculous.”
“No, it doesn’t, Seggy. Who puts a time limit on love? Who ever said that you have to be with someone for a week, a year, a decade before you know that person’s it for you?
I knew your father for a month when I realized I wanted to spend my life with him. I was sixteen years old, Seggy. The timing isn’t important.” She placed her hand over her heart and tapped her fingers against her chest. “This is.”
The relief he felt was staggering. She understood him. Then again, Seg had known that she would. His mother had always been his rock.
“So, when do I get to meet Roan and Liam?”
Of all the questions she could’ve asked, Seg should’ve known that would be the most important one. For her, at least.
“WHY ARE YOU PACING THE floor? Sit down, for chrissakes,” Cam grumbled as Roan made another pass through the dining room. “Your daddy’s gonna make me crazy, Liam.”
Roan stopped mid-stride, watching Cam as he gently bounced Liam on his knee, smiling down at the boy. Roan had come over to Cam and Gannon’s in an effort to keep his mind off the fact that Seg’s mother was coming into town tonight. It hadn’t helped in the least.
“Where’s your man at tonight?” Gannon asked, making his way back to the kitchen.
“He’s not my man,” Roan argued without thinking.
“I’d beg to differ,” Cam stated, his intent to argue evident in his tone. “I’ve never seen you quite this neurotic. I can only assume that’s because he’s your guy.”
Roan knew there was no point in disputing Cam’s accusation. They’d figure it out soon enough. No way could Roan keep up the charade that things weren’t serious with him and Seg. But shit, it was still hard to believe that things were serious. Hell, he hadn’t known Seg all that long, so how was it even possible that serious was something he thought about?
“His mother’s coming into town tonight,” he explained, wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans.
Cam’s eyes widened. “Oh, shit.”
“Yeah. My sentiment exactly.”
“Lemme guess,” Gannon said. “She doesn’t know he’s gay either.”
Roan shook his head. “She might now. He was going to tell her.”
Harmless (Pier 70 Book 4) Page 16