Made for Marriage

by Helen Lacey

  “Hi. The kids are out the back,” Evie said, elbow deep in a large bowl of dough. “Poor Dad,” she said with a laugh.

  When M.J. trounced into the room moments later, Noah felt the full scrutiny of three sets of curious female eyes.

  “Is that a hickey on your neck?” M.J. asked with straight-faced innocence.

  Noah’s hand instinctively went to his throat.

  “Gotcha,” M.J. laughed.

  “You should never have been taught how to speak,” he said quietly, removing his hand and trying not to look self-conscious.

  “So, are there wedding bells in the air?” M.J. asked with a big grin.

  He scowled. “Watch yourself, kid.”

  “We have it on good authority.”

  Noah looked at M.J. and then his mother and Evie.

  “Jamie said something this morning,” Evie explained. “He’s quite excited about the idea.”

  Noah remembered the conversation he’d had in the truck with the kids. He turned to his mother. “Thanks for watching them.”

  “How’s Maddy?” Evie asked, still digging into dough.

  “Broken arm.”

  “She’s lucky Callie was there,” Evie said. “Lily called and told us what happened.”

  He nodded. “Quite the hotline you girls have going.”

  “Well you never tell us anything,” M.J. complained.

  Nor did he intend to. “With good reason,” he quipped. “Thanks again,” he said to his mother, Barbara, who patted his shoulder affectionately.

  It took ten minutes to finish saying goodbye and load the kids in the truck. Noah collected Lily on the way home, declining Angela’s offer for coffee. When he got home he called Callie, amused by his own eagerness. She answered her cell on the seventh ring and he wondered if she’d considered not picking up. She sounded friendly enough and they talked for a while. She told him she had a new student that afternoon and would have to take a rain check on his idea for the beach.

  Noah didn’t push the idea. He ended the call with an invitation to his parents’ home for the coming Saturday. But instinct told him something was wrong.

  Callie knew Noah felt her pull back. And she knew she was acting like a first-rate coward. One mention of his kids and she’d panicked. It wasn’t remotely rational. But since when was fear ever rational?

  The kids were part of him. His blood. His life.

  If she wanted Noah—and she did—then she had to learn how to deal with the reality of his children. She had to love them with her whole heart.

  And without really understanding why, her heart simply didn’t feel big enough for all that love. It was something she needed to talk to him about. He was smart. If he hadn’t figured it out already, he would soon enough. He’d sensed something was wrong, and Callie knew if they had any chance of a future together they needed complete honesty between them.

  But she put it off.

  On Saturday night they were going to his parents’ home for an anniversary party.

  She waited on the porch for him to collect her while counting bugs brave enough to aim flight at the mosquito zapper hung from the ceiling. She was nervous about meeting his family. Foolish, she supposed. She already knew Evie, and M.J. and Cameron and she suspected his parents were good people—they would have to be to have raised such a son.

  He arrived on time and her stomach did a silly roll when he got out of the truck. He looked great in dark cargo pants and a polo shirt. Her heart crunched up. The kids were in the backseat, she noticed, minus Lily, and she wondered if that was why he didn’t kiss her.

  “You look beautiful,” he said as she got into his vehicle.

  Callie smiled and looked in the back, and the three younger children greeted her with a chorus of hellos. They were clearly excited to see her. Shame licked along her spine. They were great kids. And they genuinely cared for her.

  I just have to let myself love them without guilt. Without feeling like I’m letting go of Ryan.

  Because that was what she was afraid of. Losing Ryan. Forgetting Ryan. Replacing Ryan.

  “Where’s Lily?” she asked, pushing the idea aside for the moment. She’d concentrate on the present and enjoy the moment. There was time for thoughts later.

  “With Evie,” he replied. “They’re meeting us there.”

  He drove into Crystal Point and pulled up outside a large, two-story home one street back from The Parade in a quiet cul-de-sac. The gardens were immaculate; the home looked like it was made for a large family. A couple of cars were parked in the driveway and he pulled up off the curb.

  The moment she walked into their home, Barbara and Bill Preston greeted her with smiles and a warm welcome. Barbara hugged her son closely and Callie didn’t miss the gentle way she ruffled his hair and smiled at him, like they had a lovely secret between them. The twins and Jamie clearly adored their grandparents and were rustled away with their grandfather to play a game of Wii bowling before the guests began to arrive.

  “The girls are in the kitchen,” Barbara said. “Join us after you’ve shown Callie the house.”

  Callie followed when Noah led her upstairs.

  “So,” she said, standing in the middle of a room at the top of the stairway. “This was your bedroom when you were growing up?”

  He smiled. “Yep.”

  It appeared to be as typical a teenage boy’s room as you’d get. Blue quilt and accessories, shelves filled with trophies, faded posters of rock bands on the walls. She took a closer look at the trophies—some for sports, some for academics.

  “So you were a jock?” she asked, picking up a medal awarded for a code of football she’d vaguely heard of. She fingered another one granted for rowing. “Looks like you were good at it.” She placed the medal down. “How old were you when you moved out?”

  “Eighteen,” he said. “I moved to Brisbane to study engineering.”

  “Is that where you met your wife?”

  He took a step toward her. “Ex-wife,” he corrected. “And no. I always knew I’d take the business over from my father, but I wanted to experience life a bit before I came back to Crystal Point.” He picked an old volleyball off the floor and tossed it onto the narrow bed. “I finished my degree in three years, then took off. I backpacked in Europe for about a year, until my money ran out. Then I worked at a pub in London trying to save enough for my fare back home, which is where I met Margaret. She was there on a dancing scholarship. We hooked up and I stayed for another year or so. But I always intended to come back.” He shrugged. “A couple of months after I got home she called to say she was pregnant.”

  “And then you married her?” She hoped he didn’t hear the tinge of jealousy in her tone.

  He reached for her. “Let’s not talk about that, okay?” His arms tightened around her. “I’d much rather kiss you.”

  And he did. So thoroughly Callie thought she might pass out.

  When they returned downstairs the kitchen was a hive of activity. Mary-Jayne was there decorating a cheesecake, and Evie was wrapping potatoes in aluminum foil.

  Both sisters’ eyes popped wide when they saw them, but to their credit they didn’t say anything. Lily was there, glaring at Callie with confused eyes. The teenager headed to the living room and mumbled something about how it was “typical” and no one cared what she wanted.

  “Should I go and talk with her?” Callie asked.

  Noah shook his head. “She’ll be fine.”

  “He’s right,” Evie said. “She’s just reacting. Lily doesn’t know how she’s feeling.”

  “All teenagers are obnoxious,” Mary-Jayne announced. “Remember how I was?”

  Noah smiled. “Was?”

  Everyone laughed and Callie was struck by the deep
affection they shared for one another. It made her miss her own family.

  Within half an hour the celebration had taken itself outside. The outdoor entertainment area was huge and had been transformed with a long buffet table and chairs for those inclined to sit. Music filtered through strategically placed speakers. People started arriving, including Cameron Jakowski and Fiona, who were both well acquainted with the Prestons. He shook Noah’s hand, kissed Barbara on the cheek while stealing a piece of cheese off a plate and teased M.J. about her Don’t Blame Me…I Voted For The Other Guy apron.

  Fiona gave Callie an unexpected hug. “I’m glad you’re here,” she whispered. She grabbed Callie’s arm and pulled her aside. “So you’re really dating now?” Fiona asked in a ludicrously excited voice.

  Dating? They were lovers—did that count as dating? “We’re…something.”

  She looked across the deck to where Noah stood with Cameron—and also the most beautiful woman Callie had ever seen, decked out in what was clearly a high-end designer dress of deep red and incredible four-inch heels. “Who’s that?” she asked.

  Fiona looked up and her pretty face turned into a grimace. “Princess Grace.”

  “Huh?’

  “Noah’s sister,” she explained. “She’s some hot-shot businesswoman in New York. A real cold fish. You can freeze ice on her—”

  “I get the picture.” Callie smiled. “She’s stunning.”

  Fiona made a face. “Yeah, yeah. Beautiful and about as pleasant as global warming.”

  Callie’s eyes widened. “Would your opinion have anything to do with the fact she’s talking to Cameron right now?”

  Fiona blushed. “No point,” she admitted. “We’re destined to be just friends.”

  Callie sensed the disappointment in her friend’s voice. “There’s someone out there for you.”

  Fiona raised both her brows. “Spoken like a woman who’s fallen in love.”

  Callie froze when she felt a strong arm unexpectedly moved around her waist. She looked at Fiona and her friend’s eyes popped wide open.

  Had he heard Fiona’s teasing?

  She felt his breath in her ear. “Dance with me?”

  She pulled back. “Dance where?”

  “By the pool,” he said.

  Callie looked toward the pool area. Strategically placed candles created a soft, romantic mood and she couldn’t resist joining the few couples already swaying to the music. “Okay.”

  Moments later she was in his arms. His parents were there, she noticed, dancing cheek to cheek and clearly still in love after many years of marriage.

  “What are you thinking?” he asked.

  “That your parents look happy together.”

  Noah smiled. “They make it look easy.”

  She looked at him, conscious of how close they were as he kissed her forehead gently. She could feel his thighs against her own every time they moved and a jolt of need arrowed low in her belly.

  She knew what he read in her eyes, knew he could feel it in the vibration coming off her skin. “Ah, Callie,” he said, so close to her ear his mouth was against the lobe. He kissed the sensitive spot. “I want to take you home and make love to you.”

  “I want that, too,” she breathed.

  “In my bed?” he queried.

  His bed? Somewhere they hadn’t ventured. “I’m not…”

  “Not ready for that?”

  Callie sighed. “I want us to be close, Noah. Really, I do.”

  “As what? Lovers?”

  They were lovers. And she wanted to make love with him again. But she knew that for Noah that wouldn’t be enough. “Yes…for now.”

  “We’re going to have to talk about the future at some—”

  “I know,” she said quickly and pressed closer. But later, she thought cowardly.

  For the moment she wanted to enjoy the dance, the moment, the knowledge that she was safe in his arms. She rested her head against his shoulder.

  “Callie?”

  “Mmm,” she murmured, inhaling the scent of him, the mixtures of some citrusy shampoo and masculine soap.

  “What Fiona said…is it true?”

  So he had heard?

  Callie’s gaze dropped. “I…feel it.”

  “But you can’t say it?” If he was frustrated by her response, he didn’t show it. He rubbed her cheek with his thumb. “One day, maybe?”

  She nodded, her head and heart pounding.

  “One day,” she said on a breath. “I promise.”

  Becoming lovers changed everything. With complete intimacy came vulnerability. Noah was an incredible lover—caring, unselfish and delightfully energetic. But despite all that, Callie felt the wedge growing between them, gaining momentum. It’s of my own making. And she was positive Noah could feel it, too.

  He didn’t say a word. But he was on edge. Like he was waiting, anticipating.

  He’s waiting for me to say something. He’s waiting for me to say “I love you…” or “I can’t be with you…”

  Four days later she still felt it, even as she rolled over, caught up in a tangle of limbs and sighed with a mix of pleasure and utter exhaustion.

  It was light inside her bedroom, despite the thick curtains being drawn. The sun peeked through, teasing her, making her feel just that little bit wicked. Speaking of wicked, she thought, running lazy fingers through the hair on Noah’s chest, which was still rising and falling as he took in deep breaths. He had such a wickedly good body…

  “You know,” he said between breaths. “I really can’t keep taking time off during the day.” He smiled. “Not that this isn’t a great way to spend the afternoon.”

  She fingered one flat nipple. “Mmm…great.”

  “I’ve got a business to run.”

  The nipple pebbled. “Mmm…I know.”

  “My staff will start wondering why I’m leaving every afternoon.”

  She trailed her fingertips downward. “You could tell them it’s a long lunch.”

  He smiled. “Speaking of lunch, we should probably eat something.”

  “Food for energy, hey?” Callie wriggled and rolled toward him. “Am I working you too hard?” she asked, smiling and kissing his rib cage.

  Noah reached for her chin and tilted her face upward. “I’m not one of your horses you have to exercise to keep in shape.”

  Callie pulled herself up and lay on top of him. “No, you’re not. I mean, I do love my horses…” She trailed kisses across his jaw. “But you’re…I mean I’m…” The words got lost.

  Noah cupped her cheek and made her look at him. “Don’t backpedal now.”

  For the past three days they’d spent each afternoon in bed together. Callie couldn’t get enough of him. She couldn’t feel him enough, kiss him enough and love him enough. But she knew it was a fantasy. A fabulous fantasy—but still a fantasy. Being lovers, uninterrupted by the realities of life, wasn’t sustainable.

  They had to talk. About their future. About his children. About Lily.

  About Ryan.

  “Are you free Friday night?” he asked instead. “I thought you could come over and let me cook for you. What do you say?”

  “I have a competition on Saturday,” she replied. “And Fiona’s staying over Friday night so we can get an early start.”

  “Right. What about Saturday night?”

  She moved, shifting off him. “I’ll probably be quite tired. Can I see how I feel after the comp?”

  He sat up and draped the sheet over his legs. “Sure. And Sunday?”

  “Lily’s having a lesson Sunday.”

  Callie averted her eyes, trying not to get distracted by his chest as she slipped out of bed. She f
elt completely comfortable walking naked around the room and liked the way he admired her as she retrieved her clothes from the floor. She looked at the clock on the bedside table. It was three-thirty. “We should get moving. I have a student at four o’clock. And Lily—”

  “Usually comes here Wednesdays,” he said when she hesitated. “Yes, I know.”

  “Well I wouldn’t want her to see you…see us…”

  Noah frowned and pushed back the bedclothes. “She knows about us, Callie. I took you to meet my parents…she also knows I wouldn’t do that unless we were serious.”

  “I just—”

  “At least, I’m serious,” he said, cutting her off. “You—I’m not so sure.”

  Callie inhaled a shaky breath. “Of course I’m serious. I just don’t want to upset Lily.”

  Noah reached for his clothes, which were still on the floor. “Lily will have to get used to it.” He pulled on his briefs and chinos and started adjusting his belt but then stopped. He looked at her. “You know, Callie, Lily is precious to me…but she doesn’t get to decide who I fall in love with.”

  Callie’s blood stilled. Her eyes never left his face. “Can’t we just keep a low profile for a while?” she asked quietly and grabbed an elastic band off the dresser to tie up her hair.

  He shrugged. “I won’t hide our relationship from my kids.”

  Callie took a deep breath. “I’m only asking for a little time.”

  “It sounds like you’re asking me to lie to my children.”

  She didn’t like the accusation and quickly gave him a look that said so. “That’s not what I want. But please just respect my wishes.”

  “As you respect mine?”

  “That’s not fair.”

  Noah pulled his shirt over his shoulders. “Neither is making me feel as though you’re not in this for the long haul.”

  “Because I want to take things slowly?”

  He grabbed his keys from the bedside table. “Slowly? Ripping one another’s clothes off every time we’re together isn’t exactly slow, Callie.” Noah grabbed his shoes and sat on the edge of the bed to put them on. When he was done he stood, turned and faced her. “It’s pretty clear you don’t want to spend time with the kids,” he said quietly.