The Light of Day

by Lynne Norris

Tom pulled the chair out at their table for Emma and waited for her to sit. The restaurant walls were decorated with old-style black and white photos of New York City. Emma found antiques tucked away in nooks and crannies everywhere she looked.

  “You look rested,” Tom said as he handed a menu across to Emma.

  “Thanks.”

  “Have you eaten here before?” Tom glanced over his menu at Emma.

  “No. I haven’t been here before. Have you?”

  Tom nodded. “If you’re interested, they have an excellent antipasti platter we can start with.”

  “That sounds decadent.” Emma perused the menu, torn between a Cuban pork sandwich on ciabatta bread or the pan roasted salmon. “How’s your family doing?”

  “They’re doing fine. The boys have been at a sleep away camp in North Carolina. They come home in two weeks. Cheryl took a part-time job at their school. They don’t know their mom is going to be working there yet, but it’ll help to ease the transition while I get this new venture off the ground.”

  Their waiter, a tall, thin young man with deep brown eyes arrived at their table. After a brief discussion about drinks and appetizers he suggested a cabernet sauvignon, which went nicely with the antipasti platter. Emma settled on the Cuban pork sandwich and the waiter left with their order.

  Tom leaned closer and said, “I’ll get right to the point. I have a friend who works in real estate. He has some contacts and they’re looking for a place to be able to park their money in between jobs for some short-term gains. They have plenty of cash and want to move it. They’re not happy with the service they’re getting at the brokerage where they are now. If they leave, they have other players who’ll come with them. I’ve convinced them to sit tight for another couple of quarters in cash. You and I both know ‘the time to buy is when there’s blood in the streets’ and I’ve told them we’re not there yet.”

  Emma could imagine how many people were doing the same thing after seeing this bear market savage their portfolios.

  “I see a brokerage with at least fifteen associates to start.” Tom sat back and regarded Emma. “I’m offering you a job, Emma.”

  For a split second, Emma wished Tom had simply sent this in an email. Then they could have bantered back and forth about the details before having a face to face like this. “First off, thank you for considering me.” She toyed with her fork while she considered what to say next. “I have to say I’m a little shocked by the offer.”

  “I can understand why. Who would have thought an opportunity like this would present itself so soon after we...”

  Tom didn’t finish the sentence and Emma thought that saying the words might be as painful for him as they were for her to say. “I don’t know what I expected to happen in the three months since we got laid off. I certainly haven’t done anything as spectacular as you. I started volunteering in a soup kitchen.”

  “I think that’s a really wonderful thing to do. It must help you feel connected to the community,” Tom said.

  “In some ways, yes, but in others no. There’s a segment of the community you would never even know exists except for the soup kitchen. They’re the unseen. I’m sure they all have their stories and families, but who really sees them as they go through their life. I don’t know.” Emma watched as Tom’s eyes looked past her and she sensed his discomfort talking about the homeless. “Other than that, I’ve been spending time with a friend of mine whose family owns a farm.”

  “Ah, hence the opportunity to watch a calf being born. I was wondering about that. Do you have any pictures?”

  “I do.” Emma pulled out her phone and brought up the pictures on her screen.

  Tom peered at the images and nodded. “Scrawny looking thing.” He sat back and regarded Emma briefly. “Maybe you have a future in cattle futures and you just don’t know it yet.”

  The comment caught Emma off guard. She wasn’t sure if he was being sincere or not. “This offer came out of the blue.”

  Tom sat back as the waiter arrived and opened the bottle of wine. He sampled the vintage and nodded his approval. After the waiter left he continued, “I wasn’t expecting it either. I was talking to my buddy and the conversation went sideways and ended up with him setting up a meeting with his real estate partners.”

  The antipasti platter arrived and it was as decadent as Emma imagined. A glass of wine later, Emma said, “I need specifics.”

  “Fire away.” Tom glanced up as the waiter arrived with their lunches.

  “Who else are you thinking of bringing on? Where are you setting up shop? Who else besides the real estate guys will be the clients?”

  “Mark and Sam are both in,” Tom said.

  “Meaning?”

  “They’ve accepted my offer.”

  The waiter came and refilled their wine glasses. When he left, Emma said, “Okay, Mark was two doors down from you on the left.”

  “The man is a true competitor. He races in two triathlons a year,” Tom enthused.

  “I remember him. Nice guy. Knew his regulatory stuff.”

  “Sam was in the emerging markets ETF group,” Tom offered.

  “Samantha Ailes. I didn’t know her well but she had a good reputation from what I heard. Who else?”

  “Nobody else is firm yet. Pretty much in the stage you’re at.”

  Emma chose to believe him. “Where are you planning on setting up shop?”

  “There’s an office space three blocks from here. It doesn’t have the fancy views we had. It’s clean and it’s safe. The rent is at a discount because of the recession and the guy is willing to work with us.”

  “Who else besides these real estate guys do you have to bring on as clients?”

  “Sam and Mark are working their client lists. Since the firm closed it’s doors there’s not a non-compete that we’re held to. I’d ask you to do the same. What do you think?” Tom spread his hands and sat back in his chair waiting for Emma’s answer.

  Inwardly, Emma cringed wondering what was wrong with her. She should be salivating at the opportunity, but his presentation seemed to be falling flat around her.

  Emma sipped her wine and set the glass down on the white linen tablecloth. “Clearly, the, ‘buy and hold,’ model is broken. The risk is too much for the average investor to bear.”

  “I think we both agree that the factors that led to this crash are still very much in play—unsustainable debt, declining production and supply of natural resources and central banks who want to stimulate the economy back to sustainable growth.”

  “I agree on all counts. What’s your plan to protect your clients’ assets?” Emma asked.

  “Our goal is to minimize risks while we preserve or increase the buying power of our clients’ assets. We’ll diversify among equities, precious metals, commodities, currencies, fixed income and cash.”

  “You’ll actively manage the accounts.”

  “Of course.”

  “You’ll focus on what the market is telling us now using statistical trading bands, relative strength and momentum indicators.”

  “Yes!” He slapped his hands down on the table jarring the silverware and the customers at the next table. “See, this is why I want you on board. I need you to be on the team.”

  Emma felt the swell of pride inside at her expertise and skills being needed and not just as an employee, but a full partner. Still something held back her enthusiasm. “I need some time to consider what we’ve talked about so far. Do you have a package in mind?”

  “I’ve worked on some preliminary numbers. I can email the details to you tomorrow. I only ask that you don’t share the information with anyone else. I’d prefer not to have people comparing notes if you get what I mean.”

  “Not a problem,” Emma agreed.

  BY THE TIME they were done with lunch Emma was relieved to be back on the road out of the city. This time she hit rush hour traffic and the route back took twice as long as the commute into the city.

  Emma was exhauste
d by the time she got back to cottage. She took a cool shower and changed into sweat pants and a t-shirt. She had a bottle of sauvignon blanc in the refrigerator. She uncorked the bottle, poured herself a glass and walked out onto the porch to watch the sunset.

  Part of her wanted to call Grace. Yet there was another part of her that was terrified of what Grace shared with her before she left.

  What would she say to her anyway? The interview went well? She didn’t have any of the details about the job offer and telling Grace what she was leaning towards would only hurt her.

  Emma didn’t contact Grace. It wasn’t that she didn’t intend to talk to Grace at all. She couldn’t bring herself to talk to her tonight. She felt guilty thinking that Grace would probably worry. Maybe making Grace mad at her would make the impending separation easier.

  Why? Why, why, why did Grace have to tell me she fell in love?

  She knew it was true. Emma saw the softness in her eyes when Grace looked at her the day before she left for New York. Worse was what Emma felt when Grace told her what it felt like being in love. Emma hadn’t come looking for love, but it had found her.

  The more Emma thought about her sister’s question the more she questioned whether no harm, no foul was something she was even capable of doing. They had fun together and even had good sex. Well, better than good, it was great. Could she actually walk away from how she felt and go back to New York hoping to regain some sense of what she lost?

  Chapter Seventeen

  THE FOLLOWING DAY Tom’s email came as promised. In it were all the details for her package if she were to join the brokerage. She stared at the email for several minutes then closed the laptop. Questions swirled in her mind. Was he only offering a salary to a select few and everyone else was working off of commissions until he grew the brokerage? That didn’t even seem feasible. Her mind went back to the day they stood at the elevator and talked in worried voices about the immediate future and how uncertain everything was.

  How Tom’s wife vacillated wildly between selling their house and trying desperately to hang onto what was normal for the kids. Had he refinanced his home and taken money out to start this new venture? He had brass ones if that’s what he had done, but Emma couldn’t imagine Tom risking his family’s home for a new business with no guaranteed outcome.

  Emma hunted through her list of contacts. She found Samantha Ailes’ email and composed a note to her. She read it through several times made adjustments and deleted one sentence altogether. Satisfied she said what she intended to Emma hit the send button and closed her laptop.

  Now all she could do was wait for a reply.

  Emma glanced out at the sky. Clouds mixed with blue sky but she didn’t think it was going to rain. She grabbed a hoodie, locked up the house and started walking around the lake.

  If the offer was legitimate there seemed no reason not to accept it. She could put off returning to work for a few weeks more. What would she do with herself if she wasn’t working? The cottage was a nice diversion from the reality of what she’d run from. A broken relationship and job loss; together they nearly destroyed her spirit.

  Now that all the work was done in the cottage she felt pressure to make a decision. Maybe returning to her old life was a simple decision away. She could rent the cottage and get back to work. She missed the interaction she had with her colleagues. If nothing else work was its own community. Not that she was close to the people she worked with in the past, but they could carry on pleasant conversations throughout the course of their day.

  Emma walked with a purposeful stride. A determination she hadn’t felt in weeks seemed to rise from within. She felt closer to a decision as she rounded the lake and headed back to the cottage. Her thighs burned and she relished the feeling. It reminded her of the day she was out in the fields relocating the chicken tractor with Grace.

  The mere thought of Grace brought an ache in Emma’s heart so intense she hugged herself as her breath caught in her throat. When the cottage came into view Emma stopped and blinked to clear her eyes of tears.

  GRACE ROSE AND descended the steps walking towards Emma. “Hey.”

  Emma fell into Grace’s arms. “When did you get here?”

  “Not too long ago.” Grace wrapped her arms around Emma and held onto her. “You okay? You looked upset when you came around the corner.”

  Emma nodded holding onto Grace a moment longer than necessary. “I’m fine.”

  Grace leaned back to peer at Emma’s face wondering why she saw pain her eyes. “How’d the interview go?”

  “It went really well...”

  “You don’t sound as enthusiastic as I thought you would.”

  “Let’s go inside.” Emma found Grace’s hand and intertwined their fingers. “Have you eaten?”

  “I ate.”

  “Well, you can help me cook anyway. With the kind of work you do you can use the extra calories.” Emma led Grace up the front steps and into the kitchen.

  Emma gathered two potatoes and a bunch of carrots. “Can you peel the carrots?”

  “Where’s your peeler?”

  Emma pointed to a drawer. “In there.”

  “I wanted to call you last night, but I figured you would be tired from all the driving.” Grace said.

  “I was. The traffic wasn’t bad until I got to Hartford. Getting through ninety-one is a nightmare with all the construction going on.”

  “I can’t remember a time when they haven’t been doing construction there. Don’t keep me in suspense. What did he have to say?”

  Emma filled two pots with water and set them on the stove to boil. She recounted her meeting with Tom while she peeled the potatoes and cut them into smaller pieces.

  “He offered you a job?”

  “Yes. I mean we still have to work the details out.”

  “But you’re thinking about taking it,” Grace offered.

  “If we can come together on the numbers I think it would be irresponsible of me not to take it.”

  “Will you move back to the city?” Grace finished peeling the carrots. She lined them up in a row; picked up the knife Emma used and sliced them quickly on a bias.

  “Thanks.” Emma scraped the carrots into a steamer basket and lowered it into the pot of water. “I could use some wine? How about you?”

  “I’ll have some.”

  Emma retrieved a bottle of Pinot Grigio from the refrigerator. She poured two glasses and handed one to Grace. “I know this is terribly awkward.”

  Grace took a long drink from her glass and set it on the counter. “Why?”

  “We’ve had a wonderful time together. I didn’t expect that there was going to be an offer this soon.”

  “You didn’t answer my question.”

  “What was it?”

  “Will you move back to the city?”

  “I’ll have to. Are you having second thoughts about making this work?”

  “Not second thoughts,” Grace said. “I’m trying to figure out how this will work.”

  “It hasn’t even happened yet. If it does then I’ll guess we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

  “It’s easy to say that now. What happens when you’re in New York and I’m here?”

  Emma started to walk past her, but Grace put a hand on Emma’s arm to stop her.

  “Tell me what happens,” Grace said turning to face Emma.

  “I don’t know what happens!” Emma’s voice was distressed and Grace felt Emma pull away.

  “Emma wait.” Grace turned off the burners on the stove and followed her into the front room. “We see each other a couple weekends a month? How long is that going to work out for either one of us?”

  Emma hugged herself and stared out the window. “You were the one who said we would figure something out.”

  “You are the best part of my life and I don’t want to lose you.”

  “Why are you backing away from this now?”

  “I...I’m not,” Grace insisted. “I’m
standing right here.”

  “I feel it. You are.”

  “I came to you. Would you have come to me and told me what you were thinking?” Grace asked.

  “That’s not fair.” Emma sank down on the couch her shoulders hunched and her head bowed.

  “Fair or not I’m asking it. When we came in just now you said this was awkward and that we’d had a wonderful time. In your mind you’re backing away too.” Grace sat beside her and tilted her head against the back of the couch. Why couldn’t life be simple? Why did things always have to be so damned complicated?

  “WHY DON’T YOU get angry and yell. Tell me I’m a bitch for doing this.” Emma lifted her head and looked at Grace. Emma didn’t need to see Grace’s eyes to know she would see heart-wrenching sadness in them and it killed her to know she was the cause of it.

  “You’re not and I can’t. I’m not angry at you...at the situation, yes. It sucks! Hurts yes. I wish this would work for us, but I have the farm. I can’t just walk away from it.”

  Emma’s eyes brimmed with tears. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

  “It seems letting things go this far has ended up hurting us both. Maybe it’s best if we stop here and don’t go any farther.”

  “Are you saying we should break up? Cut our losses?”

  “You need to figure out what you’re going to do. I guess we were wrong time, wrong place.”

  “How can you be so cut and dry about it? Don’t you care about us?” Emma cried.

  “Of course I care. That’s why I’m telling you to go figure out if this is really what you want. I can’t help you make the decision.” Grace started to stand, but Emma pulled her back. “I should go.”

  “Wait.” Emma ran her fingers through the hair at Grace’s temple.

  Grace sat like a statue with her eyes closed.

  “God, I’m going to miss you.” Emma touched Grace’s chin and turned her head. She brushed her lips against Grace’s. She felt the hesitation before Grace relented and gave herself over to her kiss.

  When they broke apart Emma kept her eyes closed and rested her forehead against Grace’s. “I do love you. Please know that.”