Shooting Blindly in the Dark

by Nicole Jackson

  “She too damn clingy. I just met the girl, and she calls all day every day,” he revealed.

  I nodded. “You need yo space, huh?”

  “Ya feel me.” He licked his lips, as he deviously chuckled. “I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking. I should’ve hollered at her fine ass friend. She seems like more my speed.”

  I laughed hysterically. That nigga was truly a muthafucka. There was no shame in his game, but I liked that, though. He was out in the open with his shit, which you had to respect. Any girl dealing with him knew exactly what they were getting.

  “Her friend is that bad?” I asked curiously.

  “Hell yeah,” he nodded, before actually scrolling through his phone, and showing me a picture. Indeed, the red head’s friend was bad. His slick ass had taken a photo of the two friends standing side by side, and I’m sure the light skinned red head thought that he was capturing the picture because she was in it. All the while he just wanted the pic of the friend.

  “What’s her friend’s name?” I questioned.

  He grinned. “Aaron.”

  “Yo ass aint no good,” I tittered.

  “Hey,” he shrugged. “Never claimed that I was.”

  “It couldn’t be me,” I waved my head.

  “That’s what you say now,” he stroked my lips with his index finger.

  I honestly found myself getting all wrapped into Keyon and his cocky swagger, so when he asked me to chill a little longer back at his crib I was all for it. So, eagerly I headed to my car, and then I heard somebody shout, “Black Reign!”

  I glanced to me left, and noticed Trace calling my name. Pretending that I didn’t hear him, I hopped into my car.

  “Black Reign!” he jogged over to me, as Keyon pulled off, and I did the same. I didn’t have time to see what that nigga wanted. All those niggas had shown me who they ultimately rode for. Fuck him and Kaydoa.

  Kaydoa

  “Alright, good looking out, my nigga,” I ended the call.

  I’d just hung up the phone wit Trace. He was telling me how he’d spotted Jasmine at a small club on the south side. She pulled off before he could stop her, and he felt like she was following some nigga she’d been sitting in the car with. He hit me up, because he knew that I’d been combing the streets all day looking for her.

  Mentally, I was fucked up, and about to go crazy. I’d been thinking about all the shit I’d said to her. Honestly, I was hurting, and didn’t know how to deal wit it. Nobody had ever talked to me about loving a woman. I didn’t know that the shit could run this deep, and it would hurt this badly. Me finding out that she’d fucked my daddy did something to me. Yeah, I knew all about the shit she used to do, and I’d never passed judgement. There were several girls back in the hood just like Jasmine, so she’d done nothing out of the ordinary. But to know that my daddy had gotten a piece of the pussy that made me lose all common sense, shattered my ego.

  Still, I loved the fuck out of Jasmine, and that’s why I’d been so mad. It was like all that shit my mama had said was true. No matter what she did I was down wit her, and it had me questioning myself, and my judgement. But deep down, I knew that there was something seriously flawed wit my way of thinking. Yeah, Jasmine had done some wild ass shit, but I knew her heart. I knew it. And that’s why it fucked me up to see what I’d driven her to do. That shit Dookey Baby recorded was so not Jasmine, and only some deep seeded shit would push her to those lengths. I was convinced of that, and I needed to get her out of those streets. I had to.

  I’d paid Dookey Lookey’s broke ass a hundred dollars to tell me where his sister stayed, and then I paid her ass a visit. Knocking on her door, she took a few minutes before she answered.

  “Yeah?” she opened the door.

  “Say, main, where Jasmine at?” I cut straight to the chase. I was trying to keep my composure, cause I really wanted to slap the fuck out of her ass for putting that shit on Facebook. But judging from the way her face wall all bruised up, somebody had already beaten me to the punch. Literally.

  “I don’t know where that crazy hoe at,” she snarled. “She better hope them laws don’t catch her, because I’m finna press charges on her, and that bitch that was with her.”

  “So, yall had a fight?” I held back my laughter.

  “Yeah. Them weak hoes had to jump me,” she claimed. “They was mad because I put their stupid asses all over Facebook. It aint my fault them dumb hoes was high out of their minds. Black Reign’s mind is gone. She had me go to one of your spots, and buy some water for her, and that girl. That bitch out there bad,” she reported, dry snitching, infuriating me. I couldn’t believe that any nigga hustling wit me would be dumb enough to sell my baby mama wet.

  “And they knew it was for her?” I wanted to know.

  “They saw her car, and knew she was outside.”

  I nodded. “Alright,” I began to walk off, before I thought about it. “And oh, from this point on you better not step foot in the hood. You better keep your snake ass out here, and let me find out you called the laws on Jasmine. I’ma make sure that it’s a bullet in your head, bitch. You got me?”

  She nodded wit fear in her eyes.

  “And I mean that shit. I put that on my daughter. Yo ass will be one dead hoe.”

  “I…I…I hear you,” she stuttered.

  “You better remember, bitch,” I growled, before heading back to my car. I was fuming as I headed toward the club Trace had just old me about.

  Needing a distraction from my thoughts, I increased the volume on my stereo. Just so happened they was playing this fuckin’ song, bringing back old memories. “I’m not your superwoman. I’m not the kind of girl that you can let down, and think that everything’s okay. Boy, I am only human…”

  Fucked up timing was a understatement. Images of Jasmine’s smile invaded my mind. And then I thought about all the times I’d seen her cry. Sadly, most of the times I was the cause of the tears. I was realizing that I hadn’t always been the best nigga to her. So, I had to make this shit right. I had to.

  Black Reign

  “Damn,” I grumbled, as I sat up on a couch. Taking a long stretch, I glanced around the room. I was still in Keyon’s huge ass living room.

  I smiled to myself, as I thought about the night before. Keyon was cooler than a fan, and we’d stayed up all night…talking. He told me all about how he’d grinded hard for years, and was just beginning to let his hair down. He hated backwards hustling, amongst several other things. And by the time we were done talking, I swore he was the male version of me.

  But what I loved about kickin’ it with Keyon the most was his laid back demeanor. I guess he’d gotten so much pussy in his lifetime that he wasn’t pressed to hit it. I was able to fully enjoy him without the pressures of sex. Not that I was a prude or anything, but fucking was the last thing I’d needed the night before.

  I had been in need of a moment of clarity, and that night I’d gotten that. Although, I didn’t share it with Keyon I had several unresolved issues, and I’d been getting high to forget about it all. Not only was the whole Kaydoa situation stressing me out, but I hadn’t seen Kaylah in a while, and I possibly had a warrant out for my arrest. I had skipped reporting to my parole officer, because the last visit I’d had dirty UA. And she’d threatened to violate me if I came up dirty again, therefore when it was time to report again I just didn’t show up. Them bitches were just gonna have to catch me, because there was no way that I was turning myself in. Still, I needed to get myself together so that I could be the parent my child deserves, regardless of what’s going on between me and her daddy.

  “You up, huh?” Keyon entered the room, breaking into my thoughts. He was shirtless, wearing Polo boxers with Nike basketball shorts. His chiseled chest was absolutely mouthwatering.

  “Yeah,” I sighed. “I need to go, cause I gotta wash my ass.”

  He grinned. “Baby, it’s five bathrooms in here. So, you can handle that right here. And there’s extra tooth brushes
in them too.”

  “Whatever,” I playfully rolled my eyes, figuring that was his way of telling me that he wasn’t ready for me to go, yet. “Well, give me a t-shirt or something for when I get out of the tub.”

  He nodded. “Alright. Come on, let me show you where the bathroom at.”

  Easing off the couch, I stood up, and followed him upstairs. Instead of taking me to one of the multiple guest baths he had, he takes me to his humongous bedroom, and then leads me into the master bathroom.

  “A’ight,” I nodded. “Appreciate ya, my nig,” I dapped him, teasing his ass. “Dismiss yourself.”

  He cheesed, “Oh, I can’t get a little peep?”

  I pursed my lips. “Nigga, please. Good-bye,” I pushed him out of the bathroom, and closed the door behind him.

  Nixing his ass off, I undressed, and stepped into his all glass stand up shower. For over a hour I stayed under the punishing water, letting my thoughts consume me. It was aggravating that I couldn’t stop thinking about Kaydoa. He continued to call all through the night, but I refused to answer. I figured that he’d seen the video Dookey Baby had posted on her page, and was calling to tell me that I’d never see Kaylah again. I wasn’t in the right state of mind to hear that from him, so I decided not to talk to him. In fact, my whole family had been calling me, and I wouldn’t answer for any of them.

  Honestly, I didn’t know what I was about to do. Like Jazel, I’d been crashing on Dookey Baby’s couch. At that point I didn’t want to be around any of my family members, so staying at a hotel, until I decided what I was gonna do was pretty much my only option. Of course, I could afford it, but that was clearly wasting money. So, I was gonna have to make some serious choices in the very near future.

  Thinking about all that life drama was giving me a damn headache, and I needed a real distraction. So, I eased out of the shower, dripping water all over the floor. Being that I was unfamiliar with the house, I had no clue as to where Keyon kept his towels. Therefore, I cracked the bathroom’s door open, and shouted, “Keyon, where ya towels at?”

  I stood there for a few seconds, and he didn’t bother to respond. “Keyon,” I stepped into the bedroom. He was nowhere to be found, so I ventured into the hall where he was standing with a sneaky grin on his face. “Nigga, you know you heard me.”

  He licked those sexy lips. “Can you blame me, though?”

  I glanced down at my naked wet body, and then glanced back up at him. “You like what you see?”

  “Hell, yeah,” he nodded.

  Placing my hands on my hips, I asked, “Well, what you gon do about it?”

  “Shit,” he drawled, before savagely attacking me. With little effort he picked me up, as I wrapped my legs around his waist. Dropping both his boxers and shorts to the floor, his long, thick, black dick sprung up. Feeling a little X-rated I grabbed him, and guided him inside of me.

  Leaning my body against the wall, he dug in deep. It felt like a eternity since I’d had a big dick inside of me, and I was going crazy. Working my hips, I hopped up and down his length. He moved with me, helping me bounce.

  My legs were wrapped tightly around him, as he sucked my neck roughly. “Umm,” I moaned.

  “Damn, this pussy good,” he growled, as he pummeled into my gushy.

  “Uh shit!” my mouth fell open, as our bodies clapped loudly. He going deep, causing my toes to curl. The punishment was brutal, but I was told if there was no pain; no gain. “Damn, nigga. Yo Black fine ass fucking the shit out of this pussy!”

  “I can’t help it,” he huffed. “Uh, I’m about to bust!”

  “Shit!” I hopped up and down, while I tongued him down.

  “Uhhh,” I grunted on my tongue, as he busted inside of me.

  “Umm,” I moaned, as I felt my clit pulsating, while his dick jerked.

  “Damn,” he breathed, as he slowly slid out of me, before placing me back on my feet. Without warning, he shoved me against the wall, and palmed my kitty. “I don’t know where you came from, but I aint letting this good pussy go no time soon. Real talk.”

  Chapter 28

  Kaydoa

  “Really, Kaydoa!” Farrah greeted me at the front door.

  Ignoring her, I stamped to our room. I was exhausted, and just wanted to go to bed.

  “Do you see what time it is?” she badgered, as she followed me around the room.

  I shrugged, as I stripped out of my clothes.

  “Do you hear me talking to you?!” she belted.

  I turned to glare at her. “Lower your voice. My daughter is sleeping.”

  “Okay, so, now you concerned about your daughter?” she growled. “You been in and out for three weeks straight. You barely say boo to me or her, and now you worried about me waking her up? I’m the only muthafucka around here waking up with her, feeding her, bathing her, taking her to daycare. And for what…for her daddy to be running around, chasing after her trashy ass mammy?!”

  Before I could think, I’d lost it, slamming her body into the nearest wall. “Bitch, you better watch ya fuckin’ mouth! Let me hear you say some shit like that again,” I shook her. “You hear me!”

  Her face turned crimson red, as tears slid down her face. Wit trembling lips, she uttered, “The same shit. Just a different day. Only she can make you turn on me in the blink of an eye. Why is that, Kaydoa?” she blubbered. “I try my best to be good to you. But it’s never enough. Whhhyyyy?”

  I backed up, releasing her. I felt bad, for losing it like that. Farrah just always seemed to have the worst timing. She was carrying on, worrying about what time I walked through the door, when Jasmine was out there in those streets. There was no telling what was happening to her, and Farrah was running me down about a damn relationship.

  “Look, man, come here,” I pulled her into my arms. “I’m sorry for pushing you like that. Okay?”

  She nodded.

  “I just need for you to understand, Farrah. Jasmine is Kaylah’s mama. I know you love her just like she’s yours, but Kaylah loves her too. And I can’t walk in this house as a man, and tell my baby when she asks for her mama that I don’t know where she’s at. So, as fucked up as it makes you feel I can’t stop looking for her.”

  She sniffled. “But Kaydoa, I’m not convinced that you’re looking for her just on Kaylah’s behalf. You care yourself. And that’s what bothers me the most.”

  I pulled away from her. “I mean, what do you want me to say? She is the mother of my child. I never denied having love for her, Farrah. What…you want me to lie to you? We both know how I feel about her. But for right now…I’m wit you. And that’s about as much as I can give you.”

  Her chest heaved up and down, as her nostrils flared. “So, I’m just supposed to accept that?”

  I waved my head. “Only you can decide that. You know that I care about you. And I appreciate all that you do for me and Kaylah, but if you feel that this is too much for you, I will understand.”

  Wiping her tears, she sat on the edge of the bed. I stood, waiting for her to speak. I was thinking that we’d finally reached the end of the road. This was simply more than she could take. But then she waved her head. “I’m just not ready to let go. I love you too much, so I’m going to ride this out with you. Show you that I’m the better woman, and that me and you are meant to be.”

  Honestly, I was a bit stunned. No matter what I did, she loved me unconditionally. And if for no other reason, that was why I continued to deal wit her.

  Black Reign

  “You like this shit, huh?”

  Gripping the steering wheel of his Maserati, I glanced his way. “These streets can’t hold me, boy!”

  Keyon smiled, as I accelerated down the freeway, whipping through traffic. I had always wanted to drive some exotic shit, and I was definitely capitalizing on the opportunity.

  For damn near a month, I’d been kicking it with Keyon. Every day was exciting with him, and he definitely helped me escape my problems. But being with him wasn’t really a realit
y. He was a certified playboy with women all over. Sometimes he’d leave for a day or two straight, but I never questioned him. I was actually surprised that he trusted me in his house alone, and appreciated the hospitality. I knew that he was fucking other broads, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t trying to make him my man. He was just a stress reliever for however long the ride lasted.

  Keyon loved to live life, and ball-out. So, being around him was a guaranteed good time. He had the bomb dick, and always came strong, so I had no complaints. Meeting him had done me some good. I was getting my head straight, and getting high less. Keyon actually didn’t know that I’d smoked sherms while dealing with him, because I’d wait until he was gone to one of his freaks’ houses. Aside from that, I was gathering the strength to eventually face my family.

  Kaydoa was still calling non-stop, and word had gotten back to me that he’d shown up to Keyon’s club the same night I’d met Keyon. Keyon had briefly asked my why was my BD searching for me, and I just told him that he was tripping. He didn’t press for more answers, and I was glad. But as time went on, he seemed to want to know more and more about my relationship with Kaydoa. Still, I would tell him bits and pieces, because I hated going down memory lane. It all just reminded me of what I could never have again.

  “Say, pull up on the Boulevard,” Keyon urged, referring to the infamous MLK Blvd. It was Sunday, and I was sure that there was a block party in full effect. That made me a little nervous. Although, Kaydoa was a Fifth Ward nigga, he hung everywhere. So, it was nothing for him and the Green Team to swang through MLK, and show off their slabs.

  “Okay,” I agreed, while crossing my fingers. I was praying that we didn’t see Kaydoa, with his ignorant ass.

  As I pulled onto MLK, I noticed how everybody had come to show out. “Keyon!” a groups of bitches shouted, as we cruised by.

  He chunked up the deuces, with his extra-cool ass. I couldn’t help but slickly admire him. Keyon was the nigga, and he handled it all in such a suave way. Kind of how Kaydoa did. Now see…that was my damn problem. I couldn’t even enjoy Keyon, and all his splendidness, because of Kaydoa. I was beginning to believe the nigga had hoodoo on me. Because no one person should have this sort of hold on another human being.