I remembered the last time I had seen him. It was just little over a year ago. He was starting kindergarten and was nervous for that whole first month. I tried the best I could, but just looking at his face reminded me of his father. I couldn’t bear the thought of him. The time I became pregnant kept repeating in my mind. I lived on the streets the whole nine months before I came back to my mother. Once I had Drake, I couldn’t handle it on the streets with my son alone. I was desperate to come back home.
I had so many dark periods in my previous life that I started to forget who I was. After all that had happened, I wasn’t going to let Drake have a life like mine. I was never able to fit into the “real” world. Back then, all the so-called friends I had were users and abusers.
Delmara said if I saved Sarah I would be rewarded in some way or another. Benjamin said he was rewarded with new physical attributes every year. I wondered if it was a different kind of reward for saving a life. Would I be able to see my son again?
Chapter Eight
I woke up around five in the morning, like usual, and got ready for work. The night before had been traumatic for me, seeing Jesse take care of Sarah like that. Was he still in love with her? That kiss on the forehead did look like it was in a loving way, but in a more caring manner than anything. Why did Sarah want to kill herself so bad? I mean Jesse was still in her life, but not as her boyfriend. There had to be something more to it. I still couldn’t understand why.
I stepped into the shower, again washing the sand and soot off me. I thought of Benjamin. What was he up to? I hadn’t heard from him and had no other way of contacting him other than to try to see if he was at his lair—if that was even his lair. I still couldn’t make out how old the markings were. The dying fire had looked like it was sparked up only hours before.
I washed my body, turned the shower off and toweled myself dry. I heard the phone and answered it on the first ring.
“Thinking of me again?” a low voice gave out.
“Who is this?”
“You couldn’t have possibly forgotten about me, have you?”
Through the phone I felt a tingling feeling fluttering inside my chest. It was as if a pillow fight had gone on inside me. My palms began to sweat as did my upper lip, yet I felt that familiar sensation, and then I knew.
“Benjamin!”
“None other!”
“How did you know my number?”
“Dear girl, haven’t you learned yet? I am adorned with gifted talent,” he said, sounding amused.
His laughter echoed through me like I was holding a shell up to my ear.
“What do you want?” I said in a curt tone. Even though I was slightly intrigued to hear his voice, I still didn’t trust him, but there was something about him I was undeniably attracted to. He was the same as I. He could see right through me, all without having to say a word.
“What do I want? You were the one that came to me, so what do you want?”
He was tricky with his wording. It always seemed like a riddle when we spoke. Everything was a game to him, and the very words spoken amused him.
“I smelled you a mile away when I came back to my cozy little home. Did you like, by the way?”
“I don’t have time for this.”
“Oh, you’ll make the time. You want your questions answered, don’t you?”
“Okay…what do you want from me? What’s the catch?” I gripped the phone firmly in my hand and paced around the room in just a towel wrapped around my wet body. I could hear my heart beat faster.
“Not so fast, my sweet. You will know when it is time.”
There was a sudden silence over the phone.
“Benjamin? Are you still there?”
The conversation was over; either he’d hung up, or the line went dead.
I arrived at Lucky’s twenty minutes after I was supposed to start. Jan was running back and forth filling in for my tardiness. I could see the look of disappointment in her face.
“Charlene, I need to speak with you when you get settled in,” she said as the door swung closed behind her.
I took my coat off and punched in. I started to feel nauseous again as if something was about to happen—another vision maybe? As I took a deep breath, I tried to calm my thoughts. The hairs on my back of my neck were standing up and so were the hairs on my arms. The room felt static, as if something wasn’t right.
I saw Jan walk into her office and followed a few minutes later.
“Would you mind telling me why you were running late? If this becomes a habit, maybe different hours are in order. Do I need to put you on the late shift?”
“No…umm…I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.” I stumbled over my words as I spoke. I couldn’t be on the night shift; that would ruin everything.
“You said that before. Look, you know the other girls are just itching to get on the morning shift. I have girls that have worked here longer than you and are still working nights.”
“I know, and I’m really sorry. I’ve been caught up with my writing lately. I get carried away sometimes and don’t realize the time.” I was sweating it out because it was sort of a lie. She knew I liked to write poetry and even had work published, but that wasn’t truly the reason why I was running late. I wondered what kind of repercussions I would endure having to lie to her.
“Listen, if you need to talk about it, I’m here for you, Charlene. You’re a sweet girl—don’t say much―but I like you, and the customers like you too. I will give you another chance, but note this as a verbal warning. The next time might be your last.”
After talking to Jan, the nausea seemed to go away on its own. I thought I would have another vision right in the office when talking to her.
I ran to the bathroom to freshen up. I could feel the beads of sweat running down my forehead. Thank God my sweat was clear otherwise I would be in big trouble. I patted my face with cold water and took a peek in the mirror. Nothing seemed unusual, with the exception of my eyes. They had changed color a little, and a yellow tinge had formed around my pupils, swelling in with the green. I passed it off since no one seemed to notice.
As I exited the bathroom, I started waiting on my tables. The first table I went to had a man sitting alone in one of the booths near the window. He had his head buried in the menu.
I walked up to his table and said, “Hello, I’m Charlene. I’ll be your server today. Can I get you some coffee?”
After he lowered his menu away from his face, I felt a surge of energy. It was as if someone had turned on a powerful light source within me.
“Charlene?” he asked. He was in his fifties with salt-and-pepper hair. His face looked oddly familiar, like I had seen him somewhere before. I tried to rack my brain as to where, but I couldn’t think of it.
“Can I help you?” I asked him.
“All these years and you don’t remember?”
Suddenly it hit me, and a rush of memories flooded my mind. I remembered walking through the dead leaves on a brisk fall day, holding hands with a man similar to him, yet much younger, then it dawned on me; I knew this man.
“Dad?”
Chapter Nine
I was free-falling through a tunnel of water. I could feel myself descending as if I was in an elevator going down, yet my body was in mid-air, floating still. Once I reached the ground, the whirling water dropped like rain and surrounded my feet. I waded through two feet of water, grazing my hands against the black stone walls. Was I in a cave of some sort? Had I been taken back into Benjamin’s lair?
Confused and scared, my heart beat like a racehorse pounding against the dirt-road track. Some kind of sticky dew glistened against my skin, and there was a light. As the light grew stronger, the water started to bubble around my legs as if I was standing in a Jacuzzi.
“Charlene, I must warn you.” It was Delmara’s voice, but the light was so magnificently bright, I could not see her. I felt a force surrounding me—a gentle wind pulling me in.
“Se
ek and you will find that heartache awaits you,” she said as the water continued to bubble. I could feel it rising. “Stay on course, or you will endure a deeper hell.”
I couldn’t understand what she meant by that. One minute I was at work and the next I was in some kind of other realm, a realm that seemed somewhat familiar to me, yet I was overwhelmed with loss.
Everything went blank.
“Charlene?” I heard someone say. “Charlene, please. Come back to us.”
As I opened my eyes I could see people standing around me as I lay there on the floor. The smells from the kitchen were making me sick.
“God, are you okay?” Jan asked in a worried tone while a few of the other girls on staff just stared.
“Umm…yeah, I think so. What happened?” I asked as my father helped pick me up.
My father, I reminded myself again. Dear God, how could this be?
“You fainted,” he said. “I’m sorry to have startled you so badly.”
“Do you want me to call an ambulance?” Jan asked.
“No!” I shouted. I didn’t want them taking my blood. It wasn’t until after I got out of the hospital that my body started to take on a different form, but since then the only doctor’s visits had been to the psychiatrist. “I mean, no, I’m okay now.”
“Are you sure?” Jan asked.
“Yeah, I’m sure. I just need a minute.”
“That’s a good idea, why don’t you sit down?” my father said.
“I’ll leave you two alone then. Let me know if you need anything,” Jan said as she started to walk away. Everyone else seemed to follow suit. The show was over.
After everyone left and returned back to work, things settled down.
I sat there in the booth, my father across from me. He slid his hands over to reach for mine, yet I instantly reacted, drawing them back into my lap.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“I know it’s been a long time.” He paused. “However, I’ve been searching for you for years.”
“How did you find me?”
I still couldn’t believe I was looking at my father for the first time in over twenty years. I thought something would happen, like he would blow up or something, but Delmara did only say I was never to see my mother and son again. She didn’t say anything about my father.
“Well, at first I made some phone calls, traveled the country a few times on some leads, but nothing panned out, then through the wonderful world of the web, I found you.”
“Yeah…but how? I mean, there are billions of people out there. How did you find me through all that?”
“I stumbled across one of your poems in a magazine. Here, I tore it out and kept it all these months.”
He reached in his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. Inside the money flap was my poem folded up. He took it out and handed it to me to read:
Visiting Hours at the Psych Ward
I wonder if she realizes where she is
while the syringe smacks a blackberry bruise
on her skin. Looking at the red second hand
as if casting a spell on time, her eyes become
the clock; the ones you’d see in a classroom.
She fidgets a little under her restraints, crinkling
the sanitary sheets of paper into balls of snow.
I wonder what she is thinking as she mumbles
a bubble of words below her tongue. She
must have had a bullet-sharp thought
and needed to blow her mind apart
as she has blunt trauma to the head.
Her hair bleeds of crimson trees all blanketing
the bed like scarlet branches in autumn.
I wonder what she sees; white walls cracked
with chips of black underneath, like the scales
of a dragon. The ice-cube trays on the ceiling
melt the room with a cooling effect, causing
us to have fog emanate from our breath.
I wonder if she feels my flaming thoughts
as I surround her in my broken skin.
I remembered writing that poem right after I got out of the hospital. I had visions early on of becoming something else. Underneath the poem was a small bio.
“You changed your last name. I wasn’t sure if it was you, but from the poem, in my heart I knew. It reminded me so much of your mother.”
I had to change my last name to protect my mother and son. They believed I was dead, or at least that was what Delmara told me. My father on the other hand had no idea what had happened.
Looking down at the poem again and then glancing back up at him, I asked, “But why? After all these years you come to me now?”
“There wasn’t a day that went by I didn’t think of you and your mother, but she shut me out. After what happened…” he trailed off.
“Wait! This is coming all too fast. I need to get back to work.”
“I’m sorry I came at a bad time. Can we talk again later on today? Tomorrow perhaps?” He looked so desperate. I could see in his eyes how excited he was to finally see me again, but I still felt unsure. Something wasn’t right.
“Can I visit you later on tonight?”
“I can’t.” I paused, remembering I couldn’t lie or something bad would happen. “Can I call you?”
“Yes, please do. Let me give you my number.” I gave him a pen from my apron as he took a napkin out of the holder. He jotted it down and handed it over to me.
“I’ll call you then.”
He got up from the booth, thanked me and headed out the door.
I couldn’t believe it. My father after all these years was looking for me? I thought he wanted nothing to do with me and my mother. All I remember my mother saying was that he found another life for himself, whatever that meant. I never questioned her about it. We lived a dream life—well, until Adam came to ruin everything. The only other time she mentioned him was when Adam cheated on her. I’ll never forget what she said: “Men. They are the father of all evil. You can’t trust a one.”
I looked at the napkin again and noticed it was an outside-area code, one that I wasn’t familiar with. I slipped it into my apron and went back to work. All I kept thinking was how he made me feel. I felt energized around him, more powerful. After my father left that day, it seemed like all energy left me—like I’d been sucked of all my strength. Why did he make me feel this way?
Chapter Ten
I was zapped out, like someone pulled the plug on me. In dire need of sleep, I quickly clocked out when my shift ended and went home.
Once I got to my apartment complex, I raced inside and up the stairwell. Something didn’t seem right. It smelled like damp rain. As I got up to the platform, I noticed my door was ajar.
Slowly, I went inside. Everything was untouched. Scared someone might still be there, I was cautious to move.
“David?” I called out.
My first thought was maybe he had to check something in the apartment, but why wouldn’t he ask me first? Then I thought of a burglar, but nothing was missing. I looked around and noticed the balcony door was wide open as the wind blew the blinds like wind chimes. I wasn’t sure if he was still here or not, so I called the cops.
“9-1-1. What’s your emergency?”
“Someone broke into my home.”
“Have you checked your perimeter?”
“Yes.”
“Please stay outside the building until the police arrive.”
I got off the phone, walked back downstairs and outside to the front and waited for the police to come. The building was empty. David wasn’t there, so I left a message on his phone. I had it listed under “Landlord” in case of an emergency.
The police arrived within minutes.
“Are you Ms. Peters?”
“Yes, my apartment is on the second floor.”
We proceeded inside to my apartment. They looked at everything, took pictures and asked me a series of questions.
“Anything gone?” the police officer asked.
“No.”
“Did you notice anything different once you walked in?” He was writing notes as we spoke.
“Well, there was…” I said, then caught myself about the smell I discovered. How would I explain that? The scent was not detectable to humans. It was only from my own keen sense that I knew.
“There was what?”
I froze. I couldn’t come up with anything, yet I knew I couldn’t lie. God, why have you done this to me? I could never let anyone know I was a demon, yet I couldn’t lie either. This was virtually impossible. Suddenly, I reacted.
“There was a man.” How bad a lie could that be?
“A man? Can you describe him?”
God, I thought, I know how this works. With one lie would come another and soon a created truth. I stopped and thought about what to say next. I kept my answers short.
“No.”
“Where did you first see him?”
“I don’t remember.”
“Well, Ms. Peters, you are not giving us a lot to go on. We will check around the perimeter and let you know if we find anything.”
“Thanks, Officer, I appreciate that.”
They roamed around a little longer, checking in my bedroom and bathroom and in the closets, then left.
It was now late afternoon. I just wanted to sleep, but I couldn’t lay there with my thoughts racing, so I decided to take my mind off everything and went on the computer.
Once I signed on, I saw there was a message from Jesse, so I opened it:
Charlene,
I don’t know what’s going with you lately. We haven’t talked in a while, and I am concerned about you. I guess I scared you away when I said what I said. I really did mean it too. There’s a lot going on with me. I wanted to talk to you about it. Please e-mail me when you can.
Jesse
After I read the note, I thought about him for a while. I felt bad that I peeked on him like that. The stalking thing wasn’t for me. I felt so guilty doing it. It was the first time I had seen him. I didn’t want it to turn out that way, but it had. The urge to see him was so overwhelming I couldn’t resist, but I was kicking myself for doing it. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.
Demon Girl Page 4