Only for You

by Marquita Valentine

  He nods, his fingers furrowing into my hair as I put my lips around him. He’s hard satin and tastes like me, like us.

  I do everything he likes, everything he’s ever told me, as I take him in my mouth. I lick, suck, and nibble at him. I let him take over, guiding his cock further into my mouth, his hand cupping my neck.

  When he finally lets himself go, I don’t pull away. I stay with him, until the very end. Something I’ve never done before. Something he’s never asked me to do before.

  He helps me to my feet, tugs off his shirt, and pushes it over my head. I adjust it and wrap my arms around him, listening to his heartbeat. After a minute, he scoops me up and heads to his office.

  He lays me down on the couch there, one that he had replaced over a month ago. It’s wide enough for the two of us, and he lies down beside me.

  “I’m sorry,” he says, and I know he’s not speaking of what just happened. Well, not completely.

  “It’s okay.”

  “Ever think all this fighting we’re doing means we don’t belong together?”

  My heart speeds up. “No. I think it’s us trying to figure things out.” But I know it’s not. It’s just us, fighting over stupid stuff, like when we got in an argument at the Piggly Wiggly the other day.

  “I can pay for my own damn groceries, Rae,” he said once we were in his Jeep.

  “But it was my idea for steaks and all the stuff you don’t normally buy. Hence, why I should pay,” I teased.

  “Steaks are only for normal people?” He stomped on the gas and then hit the brakes at the next red light.

  “I only meant—”

  “I know what you meant. I know what you always mean,” he ground out.

  I shook my head. “I don’t even know how to answer that.”

  He doesn’t disagree, but he doesn’t agree with me either. We stay like that, until the DJ announces the New Year. Cole kisses me softly, like he used to do.

  “You’ll be leaving me soon,” he says.

  So I was right and wrong. Maybe he’s just nervous about me being so far away, without him and with my ex. “But I’ll visit on my off days, and you could always come to the venues we’re playing around here.”

  “I can’t just take off work to watch you prance around on stage.”

  Hurt beyond belief, I jerk away from him, sitting up. “I don’t prance around on stage.”

  He scrubs his hand over his face and sits up too. “New Year, old us.” Then he stands, crosses the room, and heads out into the bar.

  I want to cry, but all that happens is a lump forms in my throat. One that I can’t swallow, no matter how hard I try.

  ***

  I’d been dreading this day for months now. I’m worried sick that Cole will do something I think is stupid, like break up with me, with one of those be-free platitudes you see in movies.

  Like if you love something, set it free. Ugh. That’s never made sense to me. I’m already here of my free will.

  For some reason only known to God and Everett, the entire crew is meeting at in The Double Deuce’s parking lot to kick off our tour. And for some reason only known to God and Cole, Cole’s letting him.

  “Play nice with Callie,” Cole says and I roll my eyes.

  “If by play nice, you mean, sleep with one eye open at all times, okay,” I mutter and Cole laughs softly. It’s the first real laugh I’ve heard from him in weeks.

  “I’m not joking. Callie could probably give you a run for your money.”

  Cole leans into me, taking me in his arms. Finally. “I don’t see why she’d want to hurt you. You’ve been hurt enough as it is.”

  Then why are you so bent on hurting me? I want to cry, but I don’t. “I’m competition.”

  “But not for Jaxon,” I quickly add at his dark look. “For songs and, gosh, you should have seen her throw a fit on the set list.”

  “So the two of you are opening for Jaxon?”

  I laugh. “Oh Cole… I’ve never opened for Jaxon Hunter.”

  Confusion fills his eyes. “I thought he’s a bigger name than you.”

  Despite everything running through my mind and hurting my heart, I tilt my head to one side and grin.

  Music has always been one area of my life where I’ve felt like I’m in control, where I felt like I could kick ass even when my entire world was falling down. It’s also the one place where Jaxon and I are equals.

  Venues always billed us alphabetically—not by talent. The two of us together owned the stage, apart the magic just isn’t there.

  But I say none of this to Cole, unsure of how he’d take it or if he’d even understand it. Maybe I’m worried he’d equate it with love, lust, or something like that. “We’re equally billed. Callie is our opening act.”

  “Even after—”

  “Especially after. I’m bigger news than he is,” I say wryly.

  He makes a face. “You might need to sleep with both eyes open, then.”

  I burst out laughing and then kiss him. He kisses me back, hunger in his touch. His hand cups the back of my head and his arm presses me against him.

  “I need more time,” he says. “Damn, I want you.”

  “I’m too sore.” I blush when he pulls back to look at me. Last night, we’d made love so many times and in so many positions that I can barely walk. He had been equal parts brutal and tender. Frantic and slow, angry and sweet… it made my head whirl.

  He’d made me come so many times that I lost count, and this morning, not even a couple of hours ago, he’d started right where he’d left off.

  “Widen those thighs, baby,” he’d said as I rolled over and sleepily hugged him. “I need to be deep.”

  Automatically I did and he slid inside of me, moving in hard thrusts that woke me up in a hurry. My body had been shamelessly wet and ready for him. I ached everywhere, yet I wanted more and I didn’t want it to end.

  “Cole, Cole, Cole,” I had chanted, and then he had kissed me.

  And he didn’t stop until I had to scream his name.

  But apparently, that wasn’t what Cole had been thinking about at all. “You didn’t let me finish, darlin’.”

  My blush grew hotter. “Sorry.”

  “I want you to know how much I love you.”

  Smiling as the embarrassment rolls from my body, I say, “I love you too.”

  “And I also want you to know that I understand if this is what you really want to do, for a really long time.” His gaze skitters away, focusing on something behind me.

  “Why can’t I have both?”

  “Because one will eventually become more important than the other.”

  “Time to leave,” someone says before I can respond to his statement. Doesn’t he know that he’s the most important thing to me? I’ve been doing this for so long that it’s not all of me now. It’s still a big part, but it’s not the guy I love.

  “Violet, kiss your boyfriend goodbye and let’s go,” Jaxon shouts at us.

  “Or you can stay here,” Callie chimes in. “We really don’t need you.”

  “Shut up,” Jaxon says.

  Cole and I turn just in time to see Callie flip Jaxon off. They head to separate busses.

  “Wow,” Cole mutters. “True love there.”

  “Yeah, well, I get to ride with the soon-to-be Mrs. Jaxon Hunter the entire way to Texas.”

  “Lucky you.”

  “Cole—”

  “Kiss me good-bye, baby,” Cole dips his head. “Leave me with a good memory.”

  But I wasn’t leaving him, not permanently. I kiss him anyway, tears falling as I do. He gives me a last, lingering look and curses. I start to walk away, but he grabs me and hauls me up in his arms.

  “Damn it, this is harder than I thought it would be.” He lets his forehead fall to mine.

  “It’s worse than what I knew it was going to be,” I whisper.

  “So, take my hand, don’t be afraid. We’ll get through this. Come what may,” he sings softly to
me, and this time I sob.

  I can’t help it. He’s singing his song, the one I wrote for him, to me. This boy who hates country music and who never let it be played in his bar until a few months ago is singing a country song to me. This boy who never sings because it reminds him of the dad who abandoned him is singing to me.

  “Because I still love, and I still want, to be with you,” I sing back, but then my voice breaks and I can’t continue.

  So Cole does it for me, walking with me in his arms to the bus. “Because in this world, you’re only for me, and I’m only for you.”

  He sets me inside, on my feet, and shuts the door. I run to the closest widow, pressing my nose against it, and mouth I love you to him.

  A smile is all I get in return, but for now, it’s enough. I stare at him for as long as I can see him. He stays in the same spot, like he knows I’m watching.

  “God, you’re pathetic,” Callie huffs.

  For the first time in years, I actually agree with her.

  Chapter Eleven

  Jaxon

  Today’s the first stop of our tour and Callie’s late.

  So is my dad.

  Violet’s standing off by herself, mooning over Cole.

  “Predictable,” I mutter, strumming on my guitar.

  We’re playing Dallas tonight, and we’re all sitting on stage, waiting for those two dumbasses to get here.

  An annoying giggle precedes Callie, right before she rushes on stage. Her face is flushed. She sits down beside me.

  “Ready for tonight?”

  I smirk. “I’m always ready.”

  Violet rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest. “Where’s Everett?”

  It’s a damn good question, and a legitimate one, too.

  “The world doesn’t revolve around your schedule, Vi,” Callie snaps.

  “But it does revolve around people who pay good money to watch us perform. And if we’re not up to our absolute best, then word will spread and people will start demanding their money back,” Violet says, not in the least intimidated by my fiancée.

  I clap, and Callie punches me in the shoulder. “You’re supposed to be on my side.”

  “And you’re supposed to be on time.” I raise my brows at her. “Not messing around.”

  She has the grace to flush. “I don’t answer to you.”

  Wrapping my arm around her, I squeeze her tight and say, “Oh but baby girl, you do, because we’re a couple and all that shit.”

  Before Callie can punch me again, and in a more vulnerable place, like my nuts, Everett walks out and all attention turns to him, including Callie’s. A girl with curly brown hair and black glasses follows him. She’s practically running after him, her tits bouncing.

  “Stop looking,” Callie hisses.

  “Make me,” I say pleasantly as I flash the new girl a smile. She doesn’t return it. Oh no. Instead, she turns as pink as the shirt Violet’s wearing.

  I can’t stop staring at the new girl, at the way her hair curls, or the way her clothes fit her. They’re not tight and they’re not baggy. They’re somewhere in between, nothing remarkable.

  In fact, if she hadn’t been trailing after my dad, who we’re all waiting on, I doubt I would have noticed her at all.

  “New tour, new member of our family.” Everett’s voice booms inside the room. Whenever he’s up here talking, he reminds me of the LET’S GET READY TO RUUUUUMBBBBLLLEE guy, except my dad doesn’t need a mic. Ever. “This is Bliss Davenport. She’s an intern from Western College, and will be earning credits for going on tour with us and assisting Anita.”

  Anita is the head of wardrobe. Usually, I eighty-six anything she picks out, because her version of Country is too honky-tonk for me. The only time I ever wear a cowboy hat is when Violet and I sing our duet.

  I’m a country boy, not a cowboy.

  Everett pushes Bliss forward. She turns even pinker. “Say hi, Bliss.”

  I cringe, Callie perks up, and Violet keeps her face expressionless, which means she’s irritated.

  “Hi.” Bliss doesn’t really look at any of us, only in our general direction. She squints behind the lens of her glasses a couple of times and then sighs.

  Looks like I wasn’t making her blush, after all.

  “Loser,” Callie giggles.

  Violet shoots her a murderous glare, and then marches up to Bliss. She takes her by the arm, personally introducing Bliss to everyone.

  Except Callie and me. Not that I can blame her for keeping Bliss away from Callie. Despite the lack of feelings we share, she gets insanely jealous when other females show interest in me.

  Frankly, I find her attitude insulting and annoying. I’d never cheat on the woman I love, which is why I make sure I’m banging other girls as often as my schedule allows since our engagement was announced.

  “Violet,” I yell across the stage. “Bring Bliss over here.”

  “She’s like a cow, with her huge tits,” Callie says, her lip curled in disgust. Not that long ago, Callie looked more like Bliss and less like Violet. Supposedly, she lost weight to look better in photographs and on camera. But I know better than that. She lost weight and bleached out her already light hair because of Everett.

  He likes all of his little stars blond, skinny, and innocent looking. And not just because he thinks that sells either.

  I take another look at the new seamstress for the band. Blond, skinny, and innocent looking is the exact opposite of Bliss.

  Bliss gives our new drummer a tentative smile, and I begin to hum the chorus of Elton John’s Tiny Dancer.

  Well, maybe the innocent is there, but the other… well, let’s just say I don’t have to worry about Everett sneaking around with her.

  “Why are you interested in meeting her?” Callie asks, genuinely perplexed.

  I stop humming. “Because I’m not an asshole to the people that work for us.” I stand up, holding out my hand to shake Bliss’.

  “Hi, I’m Jaxon.”

  “Bliss.”

  As soon as we touch, something comes over me. It’s like I can feel her, everywhere. I want this girl, but I can’t have her.

  Mainly, because the girl I’m supposed to want is standing right beside her, wishing she were back in the arms of the guy she really loves.

  But all I see is Bliss Davenport.

  *** *** ***

  Violet

  I like Bliss immediately.

  She’s funny without being cruel, nice without being a doormat, and genuinely interested in getting to know everyone.

  Last night, I didn’t have to sing the duet I was dreading with Jaxon. Everett thought it best to bring out the new and end with the familiar, as he likes to call it, tonight.

  That way, people would clamor for tickets, never knowing who was going to be paired up with Jaxon, their favorite country music bad boy. Even I have to admit that it’s a genius marketing idea.

  I also have to admit that I’m hoping people start asking for Callie and Jaxon rather than Jackson and me, then Everett can kick me off the tour, and I can go back to Forrestville.

  This is my first tour without my family. Before I was a minor and since they were both my managers and my parents, they tried to go on every tour. But as I got older, they got a little too comfortable with my agent taking care of me the times when something came up.

  That’s how I ended up on Jaxon’s couch, losing my virginity. Moral of the story—never leave a horny teenage girl and her boyfriend to their own devices.

  “This is so pretty,” Bliss says, holding out a short, sequined dress that I’m to where for the show tonight in Houston. “It matches the pink in your hair.”

  “God, Vi. When will you wash that shit out and get some extensions?” Callie asks as we sit to wait for hair and makeup. “You… wardrobe girl. Fetch me something to drink, like wine.”

  “Don’t do it, Bliss. She’s not old enough to drink,” I say. “You would get fired for serving a minor.”

  Calli
e rolls her eyes. “What’s the use of people working for us, if they don’t actually, I don’t know—work?”

  Bliss doesn’t say a word, just hangs up our outfits, places the shoes that go with them underneath, and leaves the room.

  “Come find me after the show, Bliss. We’ll get something to eat,” I yell, hoping she heard me. If not, I’ll go find her.

  “You were always a strange one.”

  “And you were always a snob.”

  Callie smirks at me. “Good times, Vi. Good times.”

  As the makeup and hair artists arrive, I text Cole.

  Me: Miss you. Houston is stinking hot.

  Cole: Miss you too. It’s cold here.

  Me: Lots of homework tonight?

  Cole: No.

  Me: ?

  Cole: I’m not taking classes this semester.

  I want to call him right then, and fuss at him for dropping out. He’s working all the time now, barely doing anything other than raising Kelly and hanging out with his boys.

  Cole needs to do something for him, but the last time I tried to bring up the subject, he jumped all down my throat. I don’t want to fight, especially not when we’re a twenty-four hour drive away from each other.

  Me: Okay. Love you.

  Cole: Love you too

  ***

  Two days later, I finally get Cole on the phone. “Guess what!”

  “What?” There’s lots of background noise, and I can barely hear myself think.

  “Can you go outside or something?”

  “Sure.” The noise drops away, or he’s clicked off the television.

  “So, guess what!”

  “You get to come home for a couple of days.”

  “Who told you?”

  “You did, right before you went on tour, you showed me your schedule and told me to mark down the days we would be able to see each other.”

  Determined not to let his less-than-enthusiastic tone get me down, I continue on, “My flight gets in at ten AM. I worked it around your schedule, and Kelly’s too. We can wait for her bus on the front porch, just like we used to.”