by Lexi Blake
“Tell me how you got into the lifestyle. Here, I think this one is yours,” he offered and what was probably a straw hit her nose.
She reached up and brought the straw to her lips. Pineappley perfection coated her tongue. “Yum, piña colada.”
“I’m glad I got that right. Luckily your drink is cold and mine is room temperature, as a good bourbon should be.” His hand caressed her leg as she took control of the drink. “Now tell me how you got into the lifestyle.”
It was the question that started many a conversation between Dom and sub. “I was nineteen and I got invited to a play party by this guy on campus and I went.”
He was quiet for a moment. “A boyfriend?”
“Nah, a guy in my chemistry class. I kind of knew him. He turned out to be a super jerk, but I met a whole bunch of people.”
“You know that was dangerous, right?”
Thank god it was dark and he couldn’t see how fast she rolled her eyes. “Yes. I know this now. At the time it felt like an adventure. Kind of like this. Luckily I haven’t been murdered yet, and if you knew my history you would think that’s a miracle.”
He stiffened and for a moment, she worried she’d said something wrong. “Well, I’m glad you’re okay. There are dangerous people out there. A sub has to be careful. A Dom has to be careful. I’m hoping you don’t go to random play parties anymore.”
“Big Tag would kick my ass,” she admitted. “I don’t need to explore that way anymore. Sanctum is safe, but I know all the Doms. I haven’t made a strong connection beyond friendship with any of them. The last time I had a regular Dom was years and years ago. Now I just play but it almost never gets serious.” Meaning sexual. God, it had been forever since she’d had sex. “There was a guy a while back who I thought might be interested, but it didn’t work out.”
“Really? Why didn’t it work out?”
Because Jared Johns had been a douchebag idiot who hadn’t stuck around to fight it out with her and then when she thought they might get it all together…well, she couldn’t blame him for that. “Our timing was always bad. When I wanted something serious, he wasn’t ready. When he did, I wasn’t.”
“Why weren’t you ready? I mean, if you were before, what happened to make you not ready?”
A little spit had happened. “People change. I changed. So how about you? How did you decide to become a big, bad Dom?”
“I didn’t have a lot of discipline growing up,” he admitted. “Not that I was a bad kid, but I was the kind of kid who skated by on charm, if you know what I mean. When the world went bad, it hit me hard. I ended up in the lifestyle because someone I admired had taught himself discipline through it. There were times in my life when I wasn’t in control of anything, and I learned that if I could master myself enough to take care of someone else, that could sometimes be the thing I needed to hold myself together.”
So he was super strong, charming, and willing to make himself vulnerable. Too many Doms came in with “I was born to dominate, baby. I can’t give up control.” What they really meant was that they were selfish assholes. It was why she loved Sanctum. Big Tag tended to weed them out pretty quick. “Rough childhood?”
“Not at all. That was the point. I had a lovely childhood, though it wasn’t a wealthy one. We were poor. My father wasn’t around, but my older brother was. My mom…I still miss my mother.”
“I do, too.” The darkness allowed her to do what she wouldn’t in the light. It let her allow the tears that pierced her eyes to drop onto her cheeks. “I miss her every day. My dad, too. I was a late in life baby for them. I think they’d given up on the idea. Then oops, here I come when they were both in their forties. Sometimes I think I became a nurse because I knew I would have to take care of them. And I wasn’t supposed to talk about specifics. I’m sorry.”
“I think those rules are going to be very hard to follow,” he replied. “Telling me you’re a nurse isn’t something I’m going to spank you for. I find it fascinating. I haven’t had a permanent partner.”
“Never?” That was surprising. He seemed so comfortable with the lifestyle.
“No. I’m afraid my career took up a lot of my time. I belong to a club on the West Coast. I have several subs I play with on a regular basis, but I travel a lot for business and it didn’t come together for me. I’m looking to slow down a bit, move into another phase of my career.”
Was he looking to retire? “I wouldn’t mind slowing down and seeing something of the world. I think that’s what I’ll do next. I want to take some time off from work and travel. Both of my parents are gone so I don’t have anyone to take care of.”
His hand stroked across her thighs. “Traveling is a good thing. I’ve seen a whole lot of the world, but I admit I didn’t take it into my soul the way I should have. When I was younger all I could see was my own ambition. Now when I travel I like to take my time, get to understand where I am in the world. Hand me your drink. I think we’re ready for the first course.”
She managed to get the piña colada back in his hand and relaxed. Sir was a comfortable seat despite the muscles. He was comfortable to be around period. His easy manner coupled with the fact that he knew how to play made it all more possible that this would be the weekend she needed.
If only she could stop thinking about the one who’d gotten away. When Sir had talked about his childhood, she’d wondered about Jared’s. She’d known he’d grown up rough, not without love, but with a million financial insecurities she didn’t understand. His world had seemed precarious.
And it had been precarious, as his friend had proven. She could still remember how the police had come in and pulled him from her arms. Their first kiss. Their only kiss.
“Are you ready?” Sir asked.
She had to be because she couldn’t go back. She couldn’t be the Sarah Jared needed, and that meant moving on. Even if only for the weekend. “I am.”
She breathed in the scent of what he offered her. Strawberries and cream. She loved them.
It had to be enough for now.
* * * *
“Seriously, you already spanked your sub?” JT seemed more relaxed after two hours of conversation with the woman chosen for him.
Jared glanced around the locker room. Most of the Doms had simply moved to the party going on in the largest of the dungeon spaces. He could hear the thud of music playing through the club. He’d been told there was a nice buffet since all they’d had were finger foods during the initial meeting, and there was supposed to be a couple of interesting teaching scenes.
He wouldn’t be going to any of it. He couldn’t risk it. No one was wearing masks tonight. They weren’t supposed to mingle with the potential submissives, but there was no doubt Sarah would have questions if she saw him. Forceful questions she would likely yell at the top of her lungs.
“Princess turns out to be a sweet brat who deserved to get her backside blistered, and I meant that in a good way because she liked it.” He hated hearing her talk about how she didn’t have a Dom even though he was happy about it, too. It made him realize how much he’d hurt them both by walking away. His guilt had sent him running, but it had done more than that. It had left her lonely. His guilt had hurt them both.
He wanted to walk out there and see her. She looked gorgeous in fet wear, her breasts pushed up and on display. He’d felt the boning of her corset and had wanted so badly to know the color she was wearing and how it showed off her skin. Well, what he’d wanted to do was drag her mouth to his and kiss her until she couldn’t think straight, and then get her on her back under him.
Instead he’d fed her and talked to her. He’d reveled in how funny she was, how much he adored the sound of her voice.
JT grinned and leaned against the lockers. “Mine likes to be called Sweetie. She seems nice. Maybe this wasn’t a bad idea after all.”
It was nice to hang out with a person who seemed to have no idea who he was.
Or maybe he was overestimating his own ce
lebrity. It had been a while since Dart aired, since he’d had a decent role in a movie. He had a couple of projects he had supporting roles in coming out next year, but mostly now he seemed to be known for being a serial killer’s best friend. Or the guy who got away with it all.
Of course it also could be that Big Tag had told everyone to pretend like they didn’t know him.
He dragged his T-shirt over his head. “You liked Sweetie?”
“She seemed nice. I don’t know how well it’s going to work out in the long run, but hey, I’ll give it a weekend,” JT admitted. “I take it you liked Princess pretty well.”
He was crazy in love with Princess, but he couldn’t tell anyone. “She’s pretty much exactly my type.”
“How can you know that if you didn’t see her?”
“She sat in my lap. I got a good feel for her. She’s got a great body and thick, long hair.” And the most beautiful eyes. He didn’t need to see them to remember those. He could still see her staring at him as he’d turned and walked away. He could still see the hurt stamped on her face and the stubborn will there. He’d known in that moment that she would move on.
Except she hadn’t.
The question was what had she meant about their timing always being off? He knew she’d been talking about him when she’d mentioned a man who might have been her Dom. He hadn’t been ready then. She wasn’t ready now. The longing had been plain in her voice. Why wasn’t she ready? Because she couldn’t forgive him?
“I didn’t think about that,” JT mused. “I should have gotten her in my lap. I’ll be honest, I was just happy not to fall. The darkness stuff was a little intimidating, but it also forced me to talk to her. All in all, not a terrible night.”
“There you are.” Michael rounded the corner. He had his hands on his hips and stared at his brother. “I’ve been looking for you. I thought we were meeting up after.”
JT shrugged negligently. “I don’t remember saying that. I was just hanging with my friend here. Jared, you’ve met my brother, right? I apologize that he didn’t say hello before. He was far too busy lecturing me.”
Michael frowned and it was obvious he hadn’t expected his brother to make friends. “I was only trying to make sure you understood the rules. Come on. There’s barbecue. Sean Taggart catered this thing. It’s really good. Almost better than Dad’s, but don’t tell him I said that.”
“Our dad’s an oil man. Sean’s a chef. He would understand.” JT gave Jared a wave. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow at the game.”
Where he would come face to face with Sarah for the first time. Tonight didn’t count since he couldn’t see her face and she hadn’t known it was him. “See you there.”
Maybe he would take off his shirt. He could find a reason. She liked him without his shirt on. She would sit and watch him work out like he was putting on a show for her. He could play that angle.
But tonight, he would go back to his room at Kai’s place alone. It was a penance of sorts.
“You’re not coming to the party?” Kai seemed to have followed Michael into the locker room.
Sometimes a little jealousy was a good thing. Not that he was going to rub his brother’s nose in it, but it looked like being friendly with JT had gotten both of their brothers to seek them out. All JT had needed was a little brother to show him how to grab attention. He was a master at it.
If only he could get Sarah’s…
“I think going to the party would be a bad idea,” he admitted. “Too many questions. I think she would want to know what I’m doing here and then I would have to lie to her more than I already am.”
“You could walk out there and tell her you were the Dom she spent the evening with.” Kai sat on the bench.
“I think that’s a great way to get her to kick me to the curb.” He wasn’t sure he would get another chance with her. “I need to be patient.”
Kai rolled his eyes. “We have different definitions of that word. It’s only three days. There’s not a lot of patience with that. So do you think she’s going to pick you tomorrow? That’s the deal. You two spend time together tonight and then tomorrow we’re having a big harem party. Apparently Charlotte has a costume and she’s been dying to show it off. That couple has crazy kinks, and that’s saying something coming from me. I heard her talk about the shoe fairy and how she gets caught by the fairy king and is forced to do all kinds of nasty sex stuff or give up her Louboutins. Who thinks that kind of thing up?”
He could. He would love to role-play with his gorgeous pinup girl. He would buy a treasure trove of costumes for her. But role-playing wasn’t his brother’s thing, and Charlotte wasn’t being entirely historically accurate. “I don’t think concubines got to decide who they danced for.”
Kai chuckled. “Worried, are you?”
He sighed and sat down beside his brother. “A little. We got along great tonight.”
“Well, she does like a spanking. I think everyone was a bit shocked the new guy went right there. Of course they had no idea you know exactly what Sarah likes and how hard she likes it. You’ve played with her before, even if it was brief. So it went well this time? She looked happy when I left her with Kori a couple of minutes ago. She was smiling, and she hasn’t done a lot of that lately.”
He wanted to be the reason she smiled every minute of the day. “We talked mostly. And touched, but nothing sexual. She needs affection. She likes to be petted. I almost wish we were having a pet night.”
He would turn her into his sweet kitten, stroking her and lavishing her with affection.
“Yeah, I don’t think that’s up Charlotte’s alley, but she and Big Tag will have a blast leading the ceremony tomorrow night. You’re sure she won’t see through the mask?”
It covered most of his face. He’d found without being able to see his trademark scruff a lot of people didn’t recognize him. He was planning on shaving before tomorrow night. It would be fine because when he saw Sarah again his scruff would have grown back out. He did not have a problem growing facial hair. He was the guy who needed to shave twice a day. “It’ll be fine. She didn’t recognize my voice. She told me she’s going on some kind of vacation next week.”
Kai shifted, turning toward him. “Yes, it came up suddenly.”
His brother was suspicious. He knew that look well. “You think she’s lying?”
“I don’t know. I only know that she’s suddenly decided to go away to California for three weeks to see friends she’s never talked about before.”
“You think she’s meeting someone?” The thought made him ache. Was there some man in California who had her attention now? Had she stopped talking to him so she could pursue this new man? “She told me she couldn’t do a long-term relationship, but after we talked for a bit, I got her to admit she wasn’t against spending time with a man. She said she needed to take things slow. She did say she wanted to travel.”
“She loves to travel. She and Kori take some awesome girls’ trips, and she’s gone with the two of us on many occasions. It’s why I’m surprised she’s going by herself. Kori’s tried to talk her into waiting a week or two so she could go with her, but she says she needs to go alone. Yes, I’m worried she’s meeting a man. She can be reckless at times.”
“I’ll have a bodyguard follow her. Better yet, let’s figure out exactly where she’s going.”
Kai’s shoulders relaxed. “Thank god. I’ve been worried. You can do it. Kori would kill me if I did it.”
“I’ll talk to Big Tag tomorrow.”
Kai stood and slapped him on the shoulder. “Excellent. I like having moneybags for a brother. And you’re a good shield. I’ll go tell Kori we’re heading home. We can stop for a beer at the sports bar and try to catch the end of the Stars game.”
“I thought you were going to the party.” He’d been ready to spend the evening alone.
“Well, my brother’s here and I should spend some time with him. Make sure he doesn’t get into trouble.”
&
nbsp; He smiled, grabbed his bag, and followed his brother out.
Chapter Six
In which our hero and heroine meet in the light…and Julian Lodge is an asshole…
“You are not playing football.”
Sarah glanced up from where she sat, watching as Case and Mia Taggart started walking close. Heath Taggart was held in his father’s arms, a mop of blond curls around his face. He grinned and waved, utterly ignoring his parents’ arguments.
Case frowned his wife’s way. “It’s flag football.”
“And you got your ass kicked last week,” Mia replied. She stopped and looked down at Sarah. “Sarah, you’re a reasonable woman.”
She nodded. “Which is why I stay out of Taggart family arguments. I agree with everyone and see everyone’s point. Would you like a cookie?”
Mia grinned. “You are a smart woman. Okay, maybe I’m being too overly protective. Case was working at my brother’s company last week. We had a corporate spy who decided to run, and Case chased him and decided to do that thing where the bad guy is running down the stairs and the good guy thinks he’s a superhero and jumps over the railing.”
She winced because she could see how that probably had gone. “What did he break?”
Case rolled his eyes. “I didn’t break anything. I twisted my ankle a little.”
“It was the size of Heath’s head.” Mia sent her husband the look all women sent their men when they were being dumbasses. “I get that the swelling has gone down but it’s not even fully healed yet. Sarah, do you honestly believe this is a friendly game where no one gets hurt and everyone respects the physical limitations of the other players?”
Sarah felt her eyes go wide. “Oh, no. You see it starts out nice and then Big Tag and Julian start trash-talking, and it’s downhill from there. I’ve been to most of these. I remember the year when we had it out at the Barnes-Fleetwood Ranch and someone thought it would be funny to send a bull through the field. Except it was twenty of them. There was the year Jesse joined the company and someone tackled him—accidently, of course—and we had to use a tranquilizer dart on him. We have a tranq gun. Seriously, I’ve been taught how to use it. I am literally here to save lives. Faith Smith makes sure she’s here this weekend every year so we have a doctor on hand. Sorry, Case. That was never going to work. She’s met your brother.”