No Mercy

by McCormick, Jenna

  Dizzy from the blood-recirculating process, Gia couldn’t absorb what her mother was telling her. “So you believed me?”

  “Not right away. When you first left I was sure it was a fit of pique. You were a drama queen and I figured you were upset I didn’t toss him out. I thought you were trying to manipulate me. He even told me you were. And I wanted to believe him. He was there and I was all alone. You don’t know what it’s like to be so alone.”

  “Save it,” Gia muttered. She’d heard this song before and didn’t want the pitiful tune stuck in her head.

  Her mother took her hand and squeezed. “But then you didn’t come back. And I knew it wasn’t some kind of power struggle, because you hadn’t contacted me, didn’t make any demands. I’m sorry, baby. Sorry I was so selfish and stupid and blind. Sorry you got hurt because I missed your father so much that I brought that monster into our lives.”

  Something inside Gia’s chest loosened. This was new, her mother taking responsibility for her own actions, apologizing for not believing her. She opened her mouth but didn’t know what to say. It’s okay would be a lie, I forgive you a little too much, too soon. But she needed to say something. Because after witnessing what it was like for Zan to have a real demon as a parent she had room in her heart for the woman who had given birth to her.

  Clearing her throat. “I’ve missed you, Mom.”

  “Oh, baby, I’ve missed you so much.” Something wet fell on her cheek, and for a moment she feared one of the recirculating tubes had ruptured. But then her mother sniffled and she realized those were tears.

  Completely worn out, Gia drifted back to sleep. When she woke the next time her vision had cleared and the tubes had been removed. Her mother was nowhere in sight, but Duffy sat beside her. A worried frown marred his handsome face and his focus was far off, but he smiled when he noticed her eyes on him.

  “Where is he?” she croaked.

  “Getting poked and prodded by the Illustra people. They’re doing some tests afore he takes them to the Infinity Pool.”

  Her heart sank. “He’s really gonna go through with it?”

  “He ain’t got a choice, Gia. Cap’n gave him his word, and if he don’t fulfill his contract they’ll rescind the pardons for you, Gen, and Rhys. He’s doing it to make sure you’re safe.”

  “Duffy, I almost died fighting one immortal tyrant. What’s going to happen when we create three more? We already know what kind of people they are. They hire assassins and enslaved a whole race. Illustra is dangerous.”

  “Trust him, Gia, Cap’n knows what he’s about.”

  “Like how he fooled you,” she snapped, then instantly regretted her words when Duffy winced.

  “He told you about that? My dream?” Duffy didn’t seem upset that she knew, merely startled.

  “It wasn’t a dream, Duffy, it was a holo program Zan bought to fool you. To keep you hanging on hoping for your happily ever after with him.”

  Duffy nodded slowly. “Wouldn’t be the first time the Cap’n’s gone out of his way to trick me.”

  “Doesn’t that bother you, being manipulated by someone you care about?”

  “It’s not manipulation if you let it happen. Zan knows what I want, but he can’t give it to me.”

  Gia shook her head. “I don’t accept that. You two could be together. He trusts you more than anyone.”

  Duffy’s eyes narrowed. “Why are you pushing me on him all of a sudden? I thought you and he were all set.”

  Lightheaded, Gia shut her eyes.

  “Don’t think you’re gonna get away from me so easily. Just ’cause you’re recovering doesn’t mean you get to back down. What’s going on, Gia?”

  Blowing out a breath she said, “He only wants me by default. A fluke of technology and bam, we’re stuck together forever. He keeps running away and I keep chasing after him. I don’t want to live that way, always so . . . so needy. It’s pathetic.”

  “You don’t know the Cap’n well if you think he’d let anything tie him to someone he doesn’t want to be tied to.”

  Opening her eyes she looked up into his face. “Maybe if I wasn’t in the way, you two would have a shot.”

  “Forgive me for saying so, but we had plenty of chances, starting before you were born. If it didn’t happen then, it’s not gonna happen now.”

  “But he’s different now,” Gia argued. “He’s ready.”

  “If he’s different it’s ’cause he changed for you. Forgive me for saying as much, but I’m not content with anyone’s sloppy seconds. I’ve waited long enough for a life partner who wants me for me, not because their first choice turned them down. I can wait a little longer.”

  The smile fell off of Zan’s face as he picked up the thread of conversation in the hospital room. Was Gia really trying to pass him off to Duffy? So he was good enough to screw but commitment was not in the cards? And Duffy apparently didn’t want him anymore either.

  How the mighty had fallen.

  His pride stung as he listened to them deciding his fate. After all they’d been through, all he’d been willing to sacrifice for her, Gia was just gonna quit on him?

  To hell with that.

  Rounding the corner he moved into the room. The guilty flush on Duffy’s face told him that his first knew he’d heard everything. Gia looked small and frail in the hospital bed, and his temper cooled as he stared into her jade-green eyes, swimming with unshed tears. His heart softened because he knew she had to be in serious pain, either physical or emotional, before she cried.

  “Give us a minute, Duff, and close the door behind you,” Zan said, not looking at him.

  Zan waited for the hiss as the privacy screen engaged. Only a member of the medical staff could override it now.

  He studied her pallor. “You look better than you did last night. Have a little more color. How’re you feeling?”

  She shrugged, looked away. “I’ve been better.”

  Pulling up the chair Duffy had just vacated, he sat beside her bed. “So you’re done with me? After all we’ve meant to each other, all that fighting, you can just walk away from me?”

  She gnawed on her lip, and he waited for a response.

  “Gia . . .”

  She huffed out a breath. “I’m scared, okay?”

  “Of me?”

  Nodding, she turned to face him. “Yeah.”

  “I’d never hurt you.”

  “Not intentionally maybe. But look how you’ve treated Duffy all this time. I know you love him, yet he’s been hurt over and over because you couldn’t be honest with him. I don’t want to live that way, Zan.”

  He hated seeing her like this, so reluctant with the fight all but gone out of her. “Angel, listen to me. Duffy and I had a moment in time. He clung to it without any encouragement from me. I may be attracted to him, but that’s all it is.”

  Gia shook her head. “You two have history together. You can’t just write that off like it doesn’t mean anything.”

  Zan leaned in closer. “You know what I think? That you’re using Duffy as an excuse. The only one putting him in between us is you. I wouldn’t lie to you about this, and I overheard Duffy telling you the way it is. I know you’re scared, Gia, but I thought after everything you would have a little more faith in me.”

  She didn’t say anything, and he saw all of her emotions telegraphed on her expressive face. The anxiety, the guilt, and the shadow of hope.

  Pressing his advantage he leaned in and brushed her lips with his. “Neither of us was looking for anything more than a one-night stand. But angel, I’m not sorry I got to know you. You challenge me, stand up to me, and force me to look at all sides of the situation. I’m better with you than I ever thought I could be. Gia, you take my breath away.”

  She opened her mouth but the door slid open and a nurse bustled in. “Visiting hours are over.”

  He shot the nurse a quelling glance. “We’re in the middle of a discussion.”

  Her nose raised up into the air,
clearly not intimidated. “You can finish it tomorrow. She needs her rest.”

  “It’s all right, Zan. I’m not going anywhere.”

  He rose and bent over her, laying a kiss on her forehead. “We’re not done yet, angel. As soon as the doctors discharge you I’m taking you back to my ship. I have some passengers in a hell of a hurry to get going.”

  Her expression closed up. “Good night, then.”

  Sighing, Zan left the room. Duffy was waiting for him in the visitor’s area, and they fell into step together. Neither of them spoke as they exited the military compound and moved to the docking port where the living ship waited

  “I can’t lose her, Duff. It almost killed me when I realized she’d been poisoned.”

  Duffy nodded. “I know. I ain’t ever seen you so frantic.”

  “It was like that almost the whole time on Hosta. Her in danger, me unable to do anything to save her. Most of the time she wouldn’t let me. I kept remembering what happened to Isabella. It was sheer hell.”

  Duffy considered his words. “If the two of you made it through that, I reckon you can overcome just about anything.”

  Zan wasn’t so sure. “She deserves better than me, and this life I’ve been leading. I ain’t no prize, Duffy. I screwed her best friend, I screwed my best friend, and I only picked her up ’cause of that nifty little piece of technology.”

  Duffy scowled at him. “I’m not sure I get why that made a difference. There’re lots of different ways to prevent conception if that’s what you’re fearful of.”

  Zan shook his head. “Come with me to my chambers. It’s not a discussion I want anyone to overhear.”

  Duffy looked surprised but followed Zan to his room.

  Zan poured them both a glass of Risgale and swirled the blue liquid in his cup. Out the viewport he watched life whizz by on the moon colony. “I’m immortal because of the Infinity Pool. You know that much. What I never told you or anyone else is that as a side effect of that, my seed carries my memories. Gia’s shield failed at a critical moment, and she’s been seeing my memories ever since.”

  Duffy drained his glass and whistled. “Damn, Cap’n, no wonder you’re so intent on keeping her with you. She knows all your secrets.”

  “Maybe at first that was the reason, but now I just want her. How do I make her see that?”

  Duffy snorted. “You’re asking me how to make someone love you back?”

  Zan cringed at the tactlessness of his comment. “Duffy—”

  Setting the glass down Duffy stood up. “Save it.”

  Zan watched his first stride out into the corridor and shook his head. Why was he always hurting the people he cared about most, and more importantly, how could he make it up to them?

  30

  Gia itched for freedom. A week after her release from the hospital and she was stuck aboard the living ship, having mostly recovered from the blood poisoning. She spent hours every day working out in the cargo bay/gym, but even the physical exercise didn’t exhaust her restlessness. Zan had steered clear of her completely. If not for having Gen to talk to, she would have lost her mind.

  “So, how’s the communication translator coming?” Gia asked as she and Gen sat in the empty mess hall. Gen had been hard at work helping the pirates build a two-way communicator to allow them to have an open discussion with their ship.

  “Slow, but I think we’re going to have it figured out by the time we reach the empath home world. I swear I’m doing nothing for a week except lying naked on the beach while Rhys feeds me fruit dipped in chocolate.”

  Rolling her water glass between her palms Gia asked, “So, you’re not going back to Earth, then? Even with the pardon?”

  Gen shrugged. “Honestly, it doesn’t even appeal to me. I have my man and my family. Speaking of which, I heard you and your mom called a truce.”

  “Yeah, we’re supposed to rendezvous on the Mars station next month. If nothing else came from this at least we’re back on speaking terms.”

  “Did nothing else come from this?” Gen raised an eyebrow.

  “Don’t look at me that way. And by the by, I know you slept with him too. Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “It’s kind of a touchy subject. And Rhys was there, so he knows about it.”

  Gia grinned. “So I heard, you naughty minx. It’s always the quiet ones with the biggest skeletons in their closets.”

  Gen swatted at her. “Not like you’re thinking, pervo. It was more like Zan needed someone. I got the impression he was really lonely.”

  Gia thought about the dreams of him at that farmhouse on Earth, the aching void left in the wake of Isabella’s death. Afraid to go home lest his father would kill him, unable to connect on a deeper level with anyone. “He is.”

  The door swished open and the three Illustra executives moved into view.

  Gen cast them a glare. “I can’t believe Zan’s taking them to the Infinity Pool after all they did to Rhys, hiring that assassin to take you out. It’s not right.”

  “I have no idea what he’s thinking.”

  “Gen, we need you on the bridge.” Rhys’s voice chirped through the comm.

  Gen rolled her eyes. “I’m just a hot commodity around here. See you later, okay?”

  Unwilling to stay in a room alone with three people who’d ordered her death Gia headed back to her quarters. Maybe she’d get a workout in followed by a long hot shower.

  Her plans came to a screeching halt when she found Zan sitting on her bed. “Hi,” she said lamely.

  “How are you feeling?” Zan stayed where he was.

  “Shipshape.” She didn’t know what to do, where to go, the space seeming a little too small all of a sudden.

  He nodded. “I miss you. I miss you so fucking much it hurts, Gia.”

  “Zan,” she began, but he held up a hand.

  “No, hear me out. I’m here offering to submit my rank to you.”

  What? “Zan, I don’t know what that means.”

  He rose and began tugging off his boots. “It means my body is yours to do with whatever you want. I won’t fight you on anything you want to do to me and will gladly take part in anything you want me to do to you. Forever.”

  His leather vest dropped to the floor, followed by his leather pants. He climbed onto the bed, onto all fours and bowed his head. “I await your pleasure.”

  Though the sight of her magnificent space pirate naked and waiting for her got her juices flowing, Gia felt as though she was missing a deeper significance. “What does this entail, other than your sexual submission?”

  His jaw clenched and golden eyes flashed as he looked over at her. “You get my ship. You’re the captain. And the ruler of Hosta too, although it doesn’t seem as though the people there want a ruler anymore.”

  Her eyes widened in surprise. “Wow.”

  “Also, because I’m submitting to you of my own volition, it means I’m yours for life. I cannot make a move without your express permission.”

  Gia sat down hard on the side of the bed. “Anything else?” she asked faintly.

  “If you accept, I have to stay by your side forever so you can command me. All my possessions are yours, but my welfare is also your responsibility from now until I die.”

  “And there’s the rub. You’re trying to trick me into staying with you.”

  “Give me some credit, angel. If I was trying to trick you I wouldn’t have been upfront with you about the conditions. I want you to bathe in the waters of the Infinity Pool, to become immortal with me, but it’s your choice.” He stroked his knuckles across her cheek. “Always your choice, Gia.”

  All her anxiety evaporated as she looked at the man she loved, saw his utter vulnerability that she knew he wouldn’t show anyone else. He may not have trusted her with his memories, but he trusted her with his future. Eternity was a long time to love someone, but in that instant Gia recognized it might not be long enough for her and Zan.

  “You sure about this? You don’t hav
e to—”

  He cut her off with a soul-searing kiss. “I want to.”

  “I accept your rank along with all the privileges and obligations it entails.”

  Their lips met again and fused, and Gia lost herself in the sweep of his tongue in her mouth, the slide of her hands across his toned flesh, rippling with muscles. She wanted to give him everything, to blow his mind the way he’d done for her until he was lost in pure ecstasy.

  Breaking the kiss Gia moved away, testing him. When Zan didn’t come after her she smiled and reached for her comm unit. “Since I’m in charge I’ve decided I want a substitute to rank you properly.”

  Zan’s mouth fell open. “You don’t mean—”

  Gia winked and placed the call. “Duffy, would you come to my quarters? I need your help with something.”

  “You want me to what?”

  Zan’s face flushed as he looked pleadingly over to where Gia—the sadistic little angel—perched on her desk having just told Duffy what she wanted him to do. He’d thought she’d just use a strap-on on him again. Never in a million years would he have believed she’d ask Duffy to fuck him.

  Duffy’s face was pale as he met Zan’s eyes. “Cap’n—”

  “She’s your captain now,” he ground out. “You can say no.”

  Gia laid a hand on the other man’s arm. “Duffy, if you really don’t want to, you don’t have to. But I thought you might like the chance for some closure. Both of you.”

  Zan’s heart was beating double time, although he couldn’t tell if he feared Duffy would refuse or accept.

  “Tell him, Zan. Tell him you want him,” Gia ordered.

  His mouth went dry and he croaked. “I want you, Duffy.”

  “He’s just saying that because you made him.” Duffy cast him a black look.

  “No, I’m not.” Suddenly Zan was desperate for him to understand. “You’ve always been too good for me, Duff. Too high outta my reach. Your motives were pure and you were always honest. After we were together that time, I felt like I . . . I don’t know, ruined you. Being with you makes me feel bad about me, because in comparison you’re the better man.”