“Take the days off. You need them and deserve them.”
“About that,” she tried to laugh. “I appreciate the days off but you can’t ban me from coming in and visiting a friend.”
“I’m banning you for two days, no questions. Go home and get some rest, you’re going to need it. I promise that we will look after him for you.”
“But …” she started.
“Remember, Miss Davies that this is a small hospital, small base and as far as we are concerned, you and Lieutenant Mackenzie are just friends.”
“Certainly Dr Hunter, thank you Dr Hunter.”
Xanthe closed her eyes and tried to hide her relief, and joy. She honestly thought that Mack could handle not getting full use of his legs back, as long as he could feel like a man.
Mack
Trapped in this fucking body in this uncomfortable, prison of a bed, Mack had enough. He’d pushed the table away in anger, and now without Xanthe hovering at his side, the glass of water he was wanting more desperately by the minute was out of reach.
He hated being helpless.
He resented his unit for being able to walk in, still sweaty from their last set of drills and have the fucking nerve to complain about being pushed too hard.
They had no idea what it was like to push their bodies hard. Trying for hours to have the strength and balance just to sit up on his own. Pull himself into position and hold it long enough for the orderlies to change the sheets. Thinking that he just achieved the impossible by lifting his ass off the bed. Not even his legs, those others still had to move for him.
Mack reached for the hated buzzer. He had taught himself to cook before high school and had been basically independent ever since. With parents more focused on travel and their own careers, he’d forged their signatures on school notes, used their credit cards for groceries, even applied to Defence and got accepted into the Army without them realizing. Now this bloody buzzer was his life line to food, drink, even getting dressed.
If only he could use the buzzer to relieve his hard on.
Fuck!
He was hard. Incredibly so. In all his years, Mack had never been so glad to feel his stiffening erection. Reaching down, yes, it wasn’t up to its normal full glory, but it was there and strong enough to satisfy most women.
Xanthe.
Was it a coincidence that she had been gone for two days and doing nothing other than imagining her body he suddenly got his manhood back? The new son of a bitch who had come in to set his exercises had ramped things up, not realizing that his body couldn’t do everything on demand. Not like it used to.
Still, he didn’t give up and Xanthe was gone and he was improving with her memory as his inspiration.
“Hey, gorgeous,” most of the girls dropped by at the beginning of their shifts, even the ones in the office. A year or so ago, Charli and him could have had something special, until she caught him in the back of a bar room with his tongue down some random’s throat and his cock in her hands. Since then, theirs had been flirting, light fucking when bored. But not since he’d met Xanthe and certainly not since his bloody accident.
Still, he looked forward to her smile and even now she made sure he felt that it was specially for him.
“Hey, yourself. New lipstick?” Most men didn’t understand that women needed them to notice the little things.
Charli instinctively licked her lips at the complement and his cock responded, twitching under the sheet.
“Looks like you’ve got something new to play with!” She carefully placed her hands next to his legs to balance over and give him a friends-only kiss on the cheek. “Who are you saving it for?”
He wanted to know how far it would work, could it hold out long enough to still satisfy a woman? What would he do without his legs working, able to wrap around a woman’s hips, pinning their bodies together. A quick fuck with Charli wouldn’t mean anything, but would at least prove he could still man up to Xanthe.
“What are you offering?” He couldn’t believe he just said it, but Charli didn’t back away.
“I could close the door to your new suite and give you some of my special kisses,” her hand crept closer. He’d never gone this long without sex, anything with anyone would do …
Except her eyes were blue and her hair the wrong shade of dark.
She smelled of vanilla not lavender.
She was Charli not Xanthe.
“I can’t,” a simple statement.
“We’ll never know until we try,” he held the sheet tightly to his chest as she tried to pull it away.
“No, I can’t. Not with you.”
“Are you really going to give up a sure thing, right here and now!” Charli mocked him. “It’s me, we used to have fun and I know exactly how you like it.”
“Charli, we used to have a lot of fun, it’s really not you, it’s me. I don’t know if I’ll ever get out of this fucking bed or ride a motorbike again. I don’t even know if I’ll still have a job. But I do want to be able to look Xanthe in the eye and tell her that she is the only woman I’ve ever been faithful to.”
“You thought about it, are you sure you don’t want me to change your mind.” Her grip relaxed but her eyes still invited the question.
“Char, you have no idea how much your offer meant, but how about you focus your attention back over to your precious Dr Hunter. I’ve seen the way he looks at you, and the way you look at him when you think no one’s watching.”
“Alan?” When Charli blushed, Mack knew he was right.
“Alan, is it? Not Dr Hunter? Go for it Char, you deserve to be happy especially after the way I treated you.”
“He knows about us, we’ve had dinner a couple of times and I needed to tell him.” Almost embarrassed, “Sorry about before, it’s almost like I want to stuff things up with Alan and I know he’d never forgive me if you and I got together again.”
Mack shrugged, “Don’t worry about it, neither of us are good at this relationship thing but for some crazy reason we’ve got people who want to love us. I won’t screw it up if you don’t?”
“Thanks, Mack. And thanks for knocking me back.” This time the touch on his arm was from a friend.
“Well, I think that after today we both know where we stand,” he laughed at his own joke. “Oh, come on now if I could make my bed, I’d lie in it!”
“You are bad, but yes. For once in our lives, let’s not stuff things up and cross boundaries.”
“No hard feelings? I know I was a prick to you when we were together,” he’d never taken the time to feel guilty before today.
“Like you said, we’ve both moved on and I think if I give him the chance, Alan will make sure I never think of your damn monkey again.”
“Ouch! Is Xanthe coming back today?”
“So far as I’ve heard, is there going to be a sleepover tonight?”
Mack had more than just a sleepover planned, “Can you chuck me over my wallet and phone, I want to make some calls for a special dinner in bed!”
Xanthe didn’t drop in on her way to her office. She hadn’t even scheduled his session for the morning. The relief at rediscovering his cock was replaced by anger at a world where he couldn’t leave the fucking bed, find his woman and drag her to an empty room.
No, it was karma that having spent most of his adult life wanting to be in bed but not alone, that now he was surrounded by people, in a bed with sex on his mind but off the agenda!
Where the hell was she.
Mack ordered flowers and for dinner to be delivered from one of the local restaurants. But by eleven am and with no Xanthe, he cancelled both.
Son of a bitch came in to run the exercises again after lunch. Pushing them both to breaking point before one of the orderlies came in to try and calm him down.
“I don’t need to calm down, I need my body to do what it’s told,” he raged.
“And what precisely is that?” he heard her voice from the doorway. In the only minutes he hadn’t been
looking for her, she arrived.
“Xanthe!”
Her hair was glossy and pulled into a long, sleek ponytail. Her eyes clear and without the dark circles, actually, she was even wearing the lightest touch of makeup with her smile.
The dress, he couldn’t believe she’d be so brazen to wear the nude dress to work. Even with the black jacket fastened by two buttons, he’d recognize the dress and heels anywhere.
His jealousy burned to a slow rage that was impossible to extinguish. Jealous of every able bodied guy in the cafeteria who could offer to open a door or hold out a chair. Of every client who needed her to lean over to show him how to use equipment, while showing off that plunging neckline.
Jealous of the man he used to be who knew exactly what she needed and used to be able to give it to her.
“Mack, have you been giving Dean a rough time or have you been doing what you’re told?”
“I’ve been a perfect angel,” as Dean shook his head.
“Lieutenant Mackenzie is your typical lazy bastard suffering from a severe case of self-pity. He thinks that going through the motions will get him out of the bed he says he hates, but shows no motivation to do the work to get out of it.”
“Dean, can you give us a minute, I want to try some new motivation techniques with the patient.”
“Certainly Miss, I understand we’ll be sharing the exercise routines now?”
“Yes, thanks.”
Dean closed the door behind him and Xanthe pulled the curtain to complete their privacy.
“Who the fuck are you wearing this for?” he blurted out even as she climbed onto the bed, pulled her dress up around her hips to straddled him.
“I think what you meant to say was, ‘wow Xanthe you look great, looks like you got some sleep and made an effort to dress up for someone special today’.”
Draping her hair across his face, she leaned in to kiss him. No slow build warm up starting on the cheek to get them both in the mood. Her mouth was hungry, unbridled passion and he gave it back as hard as he knew she liked it.
“Does that answer your question, or do you want more?” she undid the jacket and he could make out the small ridges of her erect nipples and hoped the small curved ridge was more than his imagination.
“More,” except now he had something new to show her. Xanthe had been careful where she straddled him, but with his new-found upper body strength, he moved her so she could feel his cock even through the sheets.
“Oh, you have been working out.” Still with the sheet between them, she ran her fingers down his chest, over the singlet until she reached the drawstring on the trousers. “This job needs two hands,” he felt everything until she reached his thighs. Then nothing.
Angry, with himself and the world, everything deflated and he roughly pushed her away. “Sorry, sweetheart, all I want is a glass of water.”
“What! Mack, what the hell?” Rolling onto his side, hee couldn’t watch as she climbed down from the bed, straightened her skirt and did up her jacket. The scent of her arousal had filled the room and he needed it and her to leave.
“I don’t need a pity fuck. Go and find a doctor or some new grunt to flash your tits at.”
“Mack!”
“Go, just fuck off and go.”
He heard the slight sniffle of a cry and knew how hard she was fighting to compose herself before leaving the room.
He’d been a prick. A total tool.
For her own good.
After she left, he scratched his legs with a pen that some fool had left behind. Drawing lines until he couldn’t feel the indent. Further than previous days, but not enough to make love to the woman who mattered.
Not the way she deserved.
Xanthe
Charli found her in the toilet, retching.
“Xanthe, are you … well is this good retching?”
“No, no way. I haven’t done anything to get pregnant. No.”
Charli handed her sheets of paper towel for her face. “What happened, I thought Mack was on the improve?”
“Yeah, well he just kicked me out of his room and I’m pretty sure this time he meant it.”
“No, that can’t be right,” Charli handed her more paper towel.
“You weren’t there. You don’t know him anymore. I don’t know how much longer I can believe him when he tells me how much he wants me but then ignore him when he pushes me away. This time, well we were … and then he … this time he meant it.”
“Xanthe, come outside and grab a coffee.”
“I don’t have time,” she pulled out her makeup and tried to at least repair her eyes. Stupid eyeliner and mascara were supposed to be waterproof.
“Yes, you do. I need to confess something and you need to hear it.”
Damn, Xanthe had tried to ignore the way Charli looked at Mack before the accident, hoping that even if she was interested, Mack would be true to his word. Was Charli the reason Mack kicked her out of his bed now he had something to give her? Had he already given it to someone else.
“I don’t want to hear it, you’re welcome to him,” a lipstick rolled on the floor and she tried to shove Charli out of the way to leave.
“Xanth, please. Coffee, my shout and then you can slap me or thank me.”
The bitch caught her hand on the way to it’s intended target, “I don’t need a coffee to slap you, I can do it right here and now.”
“But don’t you want to know the details? That way you’ll now exactly how hard I deserve it.”
Xanthe had considered Charli a friend, yes, an ex lover of Mack’s who looked at him in ways Xanthe didn’t want to recognize, but still a friend.
She also knew that the good doctor had suffered his crush for months and thought that Charli had finally come to her senses and was returning the interest. She had nothing to lose having coffee.
“You know that each morning, most of the girls go in and see our favourite patients, especially the long-termers.” If Charli didn’t stop stirring the sugar in her coffee, she’d drill a hole in the bottom of the disposable cup. “This morning, I went in and he already had a boner. I mean, it came as a shock, I walked in and it was just standing up like it owned the bed.”
“I’m sure you had nothing to do with it.”
“Xanth, he was hard before I arrived. I think he’s getting sensation back.”
“I know, we knew that a couple of days ago. Hence, the hair, dress and makeup. I thought today was going to be special but apparently you got there first.” Clutching the coffee in both hands, she sipped the amber liquid wishing she could go home and hide under her own blankets. Still, if she was going to see Charli each day, they needed to clear the air.
“Xanth,” Charli tried to hold her arm. “You know I’ve always had a thing for him, and I tried, I mean I offered to close the door and …”
“I don’t need to hear the rest. I though you were my friend and I thought Mack was … well it doesn’t matter what I thought anymore. Like I said, you’re welcome to each other.”
“He turned me down. Cold. He pushed me away. He was crystal clear that the only woman he wants is you. Xanthe, I hate telling you all this but it’s true. He wants to be able to look you in the eye and truthfully tell you that there has been no one else since he met you.”
“Then why did he send me away, too.”
“Xanthe, he’s scared. Can’t you see that? He’s fighting so hard to be the man he used to be and be worthy of you that he’s gonna keep pushing you away and make you prove that you won’t let him.”
“Why should I believe the way he treated me is any different to the way he treated you? I mean, come on, we both tried and crashed.”
Xanthe studied the scratches on the table, waiting for Charli to answer. Only when she looked up she realized her friend was still that and hurting too.
“Remember when I saw his name on your schedule? I told you that he was worth it?”
Xanthe nodded, she was unlikely to forget exactly how ma
ny of the women had been there and done her boyfriend, before he was her boyfriend.
“Mack may be a great soldier but he is a phenomenal lover. I mean, he can take a woman to the edge and keep her there for days.”
“I don’t need to hear it,” Xanthe finished her coffee and tried to stand except Charli blocked her escape.
“He knows he used to be an amazing lover. Now he has a woman he wants, is willing to be faithful for and he doesn’t know whether he can measure up – for you or to his standards. He’s afraid of disappointing you.”
“But you and him … I mean,” Xanthe couldn’t even say the words.
“Xanth, believe me, he hasn’t wanted me for the longest time. We’re friends and it took him to snap me to my senses today. If I don’t smarten up, the gorgeous Docter Alan Hunter is gonna get over his crush and move onto someone else.”
“Glad you noticed.”
“I noticed something else, too. Even before the accident, the way Mack looked at you, treated you and talked about you was different. He went all in with you and he still wants it. You need to decide whether this is a commitment you’re ready to make because if he trusts you, and relies on you and then if you walk away …”
The longer it took Charli to finish, the more Xanthe wanted to believe her. “I’m telling you that if you walk away, it’ll more than just hurt him and I promise you that every girl who has ever cared about him is gonna track you down and wanna kill you.”
“I’ve never understood how he can still stay friends with exes.”
“Call it the magic of the monkey, a girl can’t stay angry with a man who makes her laugh. Come on, let’s go back inside and tell him to pull his head in.”
Xanthe accepted the hug but it was only when Charli surprised Dr Hunter with a spontaneous flounce into this office and a public kiss before slamming the door shut that she truly believed her.
Reapers Conquer
Xanthe
“Go on, get out of here. I don’t need you and I don’t want you!”
Protect Her (Aussie Military Romance Book 2) Page 7