When a Gargoyle Pretends to be Santa Claus (Gargoyles Book 4)

by E A Price

  His face had large, square features, topped with black hair buzzed in a short fashion that wouldn’t be out of place in the military – though the swirling patterns on the side of his head would probably be frowned on. For everything else about him, his eyes were stark, pale blue and frankly, quite lovely.

  “I, ah…”

  Daphne gave her a worried look, and though the situation was incredibly surreal, she knew she could not panic – she had to keep it together for her baby. Get Daphne out the way and then she would figure out what to do.

  “It’s fine, I’ve had worse hangovers,” she joked lamely.

  His eyebrows furrowed before a light seemed to go off. “Ah, due to the human custom of imbibing alcoholic drinks.”

  “Uh, yeah. Oh, baby, it’s really late, you should get to bed.”

  The male’s eyebrows shot up his head in surprise. No wonder. While she was talking to Daphne, she couldn’t take his eyes off him. Didn’t dare, but there was also something else. She considered that she wasn’t actually as scared of him as she should be. She awoke to find a strange male… thing, in her house in the middle of the night, talking to her daughter and yet her main focus was how lovely his eyes were. Perhaps she had been working too many hours – it was starting to get to her.

  “I guess,” said Daphne reluctantly. “But I want to stay up with Santa.”

  “You must be a good girl,” rumbled the male.

  That got her attention. “Okay, Santa,” she chirruped.

  Joely rolled her eyes. Where was this guy for the last thousand plus bed times?

  Daphne gave her a perfunctory hug, though the real squeezer went to the male. Joely sucked in a breath, wanting to stop her, but she just waited for it to be over. Part of her felt there was no way he would hurt her, but whether that was misplaced or not, she really had no idea.

  “Will you come back tomorrow, Santa?” asked Daphne.

  Strangely, the male seemed pleased by both the hug and the question. But his expression dimmed when he looked at Joely.

  “Santa is very busy this time of year,” he said vaguely, but Daphne swallowed it up with a sage expression on her little face. She said her goodnights and they listened as she made her way to bed.

  Joely narrowed her eyes at him, feeling the rage inside rising. “Who the fuck are you?” she hissed.

  “I am Brom.” He shuffled backward on his knees – very wise, he was getting out of the kick zone.

  “What are you doing in my house?”

  He hesitated slightly. “Daffy invited me in.”

  “She thinks you’re Santa!” Could this be any more bizarre?

  “I am not Santa.”

  “No shit!”

  Joely rubbed her eyes to make sure she really was seeing him, and he wasn’t just some random hallucination. He was very detailed if he was. His huge chest had layers of muscles upon muscles that she had no idea existed. She had to admit she didn’t hate them.

  What a strange being he was. Mostly, he was similar to a human. Though his hands and feet were much larger, ending in claws they were more like an animal’s. Not to mention, the horns, wings, and tail. He was wearing nothing but a cloth to cover his modesty. Well, she said cloth, but it was more like a bed sheet. It had to be big to cover him. A naughty part of her wondered what he kept under there.

  “Why does my child think you are Santa?” she asked crisply, trying to dispel her curiosity about his man parts.

  “I believe my cape is somewhat… Santa-ish.”

  Her eyes flickered to the garment draped over her armchair. Yep, that would do it. Wear that, and Daphne would definitely believe – she loved Santa that much.

  Joely chewed her cheek for a moment before launching herself at him. The surprise on his face was almost comical. She gripped at his horns, squeezed his cheeks, tugged on his wings and gave his tail a pull.

  “Woman!” he exhaled, grappling with her, though being careful not to hurt her she noticed. “Desist, immediately!”

  For a moment she had the idea that he might have been in a costume, but no, his bits, and pieces were definitely real, not to mention the realness of his hard body under hers. Wrestling with him was the equivalent of pouring lighter fluid on her kindling libido. She was also surprised by how soft his skin felt; it was not like human skin, but more like buttery leather.

  Blowing her hair out of her eyes, she slumped to the floor to find him breathing a little heavier and glaring at her.

  “What the heck are you? I mean I’ve heard of babies being born with extra toes and tails and stuff like that but you… you are something else.”

  “I am not human.”

  “Alien?” Holy Christmas – an alien had landed in her backyard!

  “No,” he grumbled. “I am a gargoyle.”

  “What? You mean, one of those funky looking statues.”

  “No!” he exclaimed, thoroughly affronted. “Well, yes, but we are not funky looking.”

  Joely arched an eyebrow, and he growled at her.

  “Humans are the ones who are funky looking,” he groused under his breath, and Joely stuck out her tongue, earning her another growl.

  “We? So there is more than just you?”

  Brom groaned. “I am not supposed to tell anyone; it is a secret.”

  “Really? Because it barely took anything to get it out of you. So how many of you are there?”

  “That I certainly will not tell you.”

  “I guess you are not the brains behind the group.”

  Brom looked at her sourly before puffing out his already impressive chest; his muscles tensed causing some very unnerving flutterings in her nether regions.

  “I am a warrior.”

  “I would have guessed comic relief.”

  Brom bared his fangs, and she repressed a giggle.

  “So, why exactly are you pretending to be Santa?”

  Brom sighed, and his massive shoulders slumped slightly. “She saw me the other night, and I needed to ensure that she would not tell anyone about me.”

  Joely looked at him in disbelief. “So you thought coming here and pretending to be Santa was the way to deal with this?”

  “When you say it in that argumentative, disagreeable voice, it sounds like a poorly thought out plan of action.”

  “What kind of voice would it take for it to be a well thought out plan of action?” she asked sweetly.

  Brom grunted. “I knew you were trouble from the moment I saw you parading yourself around town.”

  “Trouble? Wait, what do you mean, parading myself around?”

  “Parading yourself with your curvaceous body, bountiful rear and tight clothing – enticing males to their doom like a siren of old.”

  Joely’s mouth dropped open. “Bountiful rear? Have you been staring at my ass?”

  His cheeks seemed to darken as if he were embarrassed. “It is indeed hard to look anywhere else given how much it quivers when you walk.”

  “Are you saying I have a fat ass?!” Just when she thought things couldn’t get any crazier!

  “No, indeed it is… fine.” His wings fluttered, and he looked away from her.

  Even crazier was how happy the fact that he had been watching her ass made her. She really needed to get more sleep. She needed to go to bed; maybe she should ask Brom to join her. Maybe she should get her hands on those delicious muscles. Maybe lick her way up his chest. Maybe she should find out what he was hiding under that bed sheet…

  Heat spread over her cheeks. What. The. Hell!

  Joely scrambled to her feet. “You should go,” she mumbled almost breathlessly. Go before she lost her last marble.

  Brom stood up slowly, and if she thought he was imposing sitting, he was downright huge at full height. There was barely room to breathe between them.

  She stilled as he pressed one of his clawed fingers against her head. “Again, I am sorry that you were injured. I have…” The dark spots on his cheeks returned. “I have enjoyed meeting you and speak
ing to your daughter, but you cannot speak of my existence to anyone else.”

  Honestly, the thought hadn’t even occurred to her. Who would she tell that wouldn’t think she was nuts?

  “I can assure you, I mean you and your child no harm, but for now our existence must remain a secret.”

  “I… I won’t tell anyone of your existence.”

  “Thank you,” he purred and removed his hand.

  His eyes traveled up and down her body, and she forced herself to remain still. She wanted to tremble under his gaze. Hell, part of her wanted to fling herself at him and beg for him to take her.

  Sweat beaded on her forehead as she fought the urge. Brom sniffed the air and frowned at her. Oh right, great, now he thought she smelled like a sweaty pig – terrific.

  He picked up his Santa-ish cape and carefully maneuvered his huge body out of her small house into the garden.

  She hugged her arms around her body as she watched him in the doorway. He turned back to give her what she was imagining was a smoldering look before he flexed his magnificent thighs and launched into the air, his wings flapping thunderously.

  “Oh my!” she breathed.

  She ought to have been scared. Ought to be calling the cops. Ought to be trembling. Well, okay, she was trembling, but not out of fear. Nope, out of something else entirely. What she just witnessed was awe-inspiring, wonderful, pussy dampening…

  Maybe she would just take a quick shower, and then perhaps consider whether she needed therapy or not.

  *

  Grey sneered as Brom made his way to the garden. Dawn approached, and they would have to sleep soon. The gargoyles with human mates were saying their goodbyes for the day. They acted as if they would be separated for a lifetime, rather than a matter of hours.

  For once Brom did not join in with Grey’s sneers. For once, he could understand the wrench of being pulled away from a human. He barely knew Joely. She had spent almost the entirety of their acquaintance hitting or teasing him. Yet, leaving her had been difficult. How strange.

  Even stranger was the hint of arousal he scented from her. It was so sweet, so enticing…

  “What has you so happy? You look as pleased with yourself as if you had battled and prevailed against a dozen human armies,” complained Grey. Never one to allow others actually to be happy.

  “Nothing,” muttered Brom, calculating in his head how quickly he could find his way back to Joely and Daphne.

  *

  The following evening, Luc was struggling to keep up with his little mate’s mood swings. While humans seemed to have an inordinate amount of emotions – twice as many as gargoyles – he did think he had a handle on his little mate’s feelings. In the last few weeks, however, they seemed to be off the chart.

  Kylie burst into tears, and Luc immediately leaped to his feet, searching for the source of her unhappiness.

  “Little one? What is wrong?” he demanded anxiously.

  Kylie pointed at the TV. “It’s just so moving!” she burbled.

  Luc frowned at the screen. “It appears to be an advertisement for foot cream.”

  “Yeah, now that she has the cream she can go on as many hikes with her family as she wants. It’s so touching!”

  Fresh tears poured down her cheeks, and Luc tried his best to comfort her while feeling completely out of his depth. While he adored his human mate, at times she could be baffling. He considered that he should perhaps seek advice from a human male, but that felt too much like showing weakness.

  Kylie gave him a timid, wet smile. “I’m sorry, I just cry at everything at the moment.”

  Luc felt himself on surer footing as his usual, chirpy mate shone through her tears. “You need not apologize for that, little one.”

  “I’m also hungry and horny all the time. I have been ever since I started taking the vitamins the doctor prescribed for me. I really ought to get another appointment after Christmas – I just don’t think these side effects are normal.”

  “Indeed, hungry and horny? I did choose my mate very well.”

  Kylie snorted. “Yeah, congratulate yourself later because I am very hungry.”

  “Then we must remedy that.”

  He pulled her to her feet and led her into the kitchen. She peered into the refrigerator.

  “I need meat,” she muttered. “Huh. Rudolph’s nose! Where has that ham gone?”

  *

  “Holy Cr… Christmas!”

  Joely just managed to catch herself as Brom dropped into her back yard. She flung the back door open, and Brom strode into the house carrying a huge ham – it even looked huge in his meaty arms.

  “What’s this?”

  “I thought you might like to eat it,” he said awkwardly.

  Joely looked at him warily. She had been restless all night and day thinking of him. He was still a stranger, and still strange – she should be cautious, especially for Daphne’s sake. But rather than worrying over whether she should report him to the cops or not, she spent the whole day hoping she would see him again. Yeah, she was really messed up right now.

  Brom seemed to be holding his breath. His stern countenance crackled with hopefulness and uncertainty, and that made her warm to him just a little more.

  “Thank you, we would like it. Ah, Daffy?”

  “Santa!” Her six-year-old rushed into the room, launching at Brom. Joely just managed to save the ham before Daphne hit.

  “Ah, actually Daffy, Santa is going by Brom these days. He brought us a ham, so I guess he’ll be staying to dinner.”

  Daphne nodded as if this was the most normal thing in the world to happen. Ah, to be six. Brom gave Joely a look of amusement, and she turned her back to him, ostensibly to fuss with the ham, but really so he couldn’t see her blush. Under his penetrating gaze was not a good place for her to be.

  Mmm, the ham smelled incredible. She didn’t have to pretend to be interested in it. It was probably the best edible thing that had ever made it into her house. That included the edible panties Chuck got her for her last birthday.

  It was also very fortunate timing. All she had to serve for dinner was baked potatoes and canned corn. That was due to a lack of planning and not going to the store, but also because she knew she couldn’t afford much when she got there.

  “Come and see my dollhouse,” said Daphne, tugging on his huge hand.

  Joely looked round at them, and Brom hesitated, looking at her for permission. She paused, but on seeing both the expectant matching looks she was getting, she nodded.

  “Yes, I would like that,” said Brom.

  Daphne grinned and impatiently pulled at him until he followed her to the living room, tail swishing behind him.

  Joely shook her head in disbelief, still struggling to come to terms with what was happening. Though she couldn’t deny that Daphne hadn’t looked quite so happy in… well, ever. She had never warmed much to Joely’s previous boyfriends, and couldn’t remember her father, but she had liked Chuck eventually. But she certainly didn’t adore him quite this quickly or as much. Kids were so resilient.

  Huh. Thinking of Chuck no longer gave her a pang of sadness. Looks like she was over him. Well… good.

  Now it was time for her to entertain their very strange dinner guest.

  *

  Brom held his audience in thrall as he told them stories of his time back with his old clan. Even talking about his parents and – ugh – Ugga. Daphne looked up at him with shining, wide eyes, while Joely looked on in disbelief.

  In all honesty, he had not intended to stay for dinner. Knowing how little food they owned, he had meant to give them the ham and leave. But when Joely assumed he was staying… he could not possibly disappoint her.

  He did wish to see them and spend time with them, though he was not entirely sure it was a very good idea. Some of his other gargoyle clan mates had managed to mate with humans, but he was not sure how they did it. Oh, he knew how they did it physically – he was no innocent in that department. He
understood their two species were extremely compatible, or at least he would guess so given the moans he heard coming from Kylie’s bedroom. He just wasn’t entirely sure how they had gone about wooing the humans. Female gargoyles didn’t require much wooing. Most matings in his clan were arranged; the rest were instigated by the terrifying females. He thought of Ugga and his manhood wilted. But human females were so delicate and soft and thought that feelings mattered above a male’s ability to hunt and gut a seal. Strange creatures.

  Joely raised an eyebrow at him and gave him a smile. His manhood perked up. “So, you’re over a thousand years old?”

  He had perhaps let his mouth run away from him; thankfully Daphne didn’t seem to grasp most of what he was saying. She only caught on to the pertinent things.

  “He is Santa,” she piped up.

  Joely flashed him a look of irritation. “Right of course. You are, aren’t you?” Her full lips made a disgruntled moue.

  He grinned sheepishly and shoveled some more potatoes into his mouth. “It’s really good,” he said through chews.

  Joely shrugged. “I just baked them – there’s really nothing to them. Hank at the diner’s a great cook. Usually, I bring something home at the end of my shift, but they were slammed and had nothing to spare.”

  Brom narrowed his eyes, and Joely frowned at him as he growled. He rearranged his wings and deposited some more ham on his plate. Yes, Hank. The male who wanted to be Joely’s boyfriend. Another reason he had brought the ham. Didn’t want Hank getting too many ideas.

  Daphne asked for another drink of juice and Joely got it for her, her soft body brushing against his in the small kitchen.

  Her bare arm touched his shoulder, and she gasped, freezing and looking at him in surprise. It wasn’t just him; she felt the tingles too.

  She bit her lip as arousal danced across her face for the longest moment. It was glorious, it was wonderful, it was… ruined as some dragon dung slinger knocked on her door.

  Joely looked up sharply. “I should get that.”

  “Are you expecting anyone?” he asked gruffly. If it was Hank…

  “No.”

  The banging sounded again followed by a wail of, “Joely!”