Killer Beach Reads

by Gemma Halliday Publishing

  "Your husband is the one who ruined my event?" Donna asked, the anger bubbling in her voice.

  "Well he didn't ruin it," she said. "If you would've just let things go as planned, then we'd never be in this situation in the first place."

  "But where is your husband? Why isn't he—" Donna started.

  "He's in the other room keeping Toddy quiet," she said. At Donna's aghast face, she rolled her eyes. "Not like that. He's playing with him in the basement. I can tell you that information, since we won't be here long. I'm gonna knock you down and tie you up like I did this cop, and you'll just forget we were here."

  "No," Donna said. "This is wrong. If you need help—if your husband is forcing you into doing this, we can help. It's not your fault."

  "It's my freaking plan," Tina said angrily. "Don't give my hubby all the credit for crying out loud. Me and Tim always wanted to get married, but he was too lazy to save up the money for a wedding ring."

  "How does zapping an FBI agent solve the problem?" I asked, glancing nervously at Lance. He stirred slightly, and I was reassured that he was still alive and breathing. I wanted to help the man, but at the moment, it was more important to keep Tina distracted and talking. She was so proud of her plan, it was easy to let her carry on while I tried to signal Donna.

  "That's just an aftereffect," she said. "Because of you girls, he was gonna start poking around again into our new business."

  "How does this help with your wedding ring?" Donna asked.

  "How thick are you girls?" she asked, crossing her arms over her tube top. "It's all about the diamonds. A relay called The Running Ring."

  "The men with handkerchiefs," I said. "The diamonds shoved into my hand."

  "Yes, exactly," she said. "When Timmy and I decided we wanted to get married, I told him to get his butt in gear and find a job. But he found something better. A buddy of his mentioned this group that calls themselves The Running Ring. Some organization that's responsible for getting diamonds from one party to another; a fence, you might call them. In exchange for doing the dirty work, the runners take a cut of the diamonds." Tina shook her hair before continuing. "Tim's buddy did a few other races and was hoping to get into this one. Said the payout was supposed to be good. Turns out, the guy wasn't fast enough or something and didn't get selected for this one. But he did tell us enough to figure out what was happening."

  "So you're saying this is happening at other races, too?" I asked. Tina looked like she was getting less excited explaining everything, and I couldn't let the momentum slow.

  "Yeah," Tina said. "But you have to be selected to participate. It's not like you can just sign up to join the business. Chad here was selected. He was supposed to be the third leg of the relay, but that didn't work out."

  "Why didn't it work out?" I asked, glancing at the unconscious figure we'd first seen in the foyer.

  "Because we couldn't have him showing up to the event and running the race," Tina said, walking around and glancing at him. "We gave Chad the same poison—a large dose of lobelia tincture—like we gave that old bartender. I slipped it to Mr. Olsen the other day when I stopped by for a drink; that one was simple, except he's was a tough cookie."

  "What about Chad?" I asked.

  Tina shook her head again, as if trying to poison someone was a giant pain in her rear end. "We couldn't take the chance with Chad that he'd show up and try to run the thing, so I gave him the same thing. Chad orders dinner—burrito and a coke—from the same place every day. You know something? Just watching someone for a day or two makes poisoning them mighty easy."

  "So what'd you do?" I prompted, not wanting her to get bored with us and start twitching that trigger finger.

  "What do you think?" She shook her head as if I was a moron. "I just bought the meal about the same time Chad normally would, except I hand delivered it before the actual delivery man. Chad didn't even flinch when I told him I was the new delivery girl. Then I put in a quick cancellation for the real order and…bada bing, bada bang."

  "Mr. Olsen was extremely sick, and I'm guessing so was Chad," Donna said. "You could've killed them."

  I thought by now that Donna had caught onto my plan to keep Tina babbling on; the woman seemed proud of her plan, and it was clear she had no problem gloating. The longer she talked, the more time we had to size up our options. Lance hadn't moved a whole lot, but he'd been Tasered, bound and gagged, so I figured that was reasonable.

  Tina shrugged. "We didn't try to kill 'em. Anyway, I sent Timmy over here to zap Chad as a double whammy. Make extra sure he wasn't running anywhere."

  "But why take out Chad in the first place?" I asked. "If your plan was to steal the diamonds, couldn't you have stolen them straight from Chad? After all, you already knew he was involved and would have the diamonds at some point."

  "No," Tina said. "That's the whole point. The Ring selects fast runners who need cash. There ain't no way Timmy nor I could've caught up with a sprinting Chad. We needed someone more like…well, like you."

  "Are you calling me slow?" I asked.

  "Basically," Tina said. "No offense."

  "I don't appreciate that," I said. "That's—"

  "That's something we'll talk about later," Donna said. "So you poisoned both Chad and Mr. Olsen? How did you know Mr. Olsen's habits?"

  "He was a chatty old man," Tina said. "All it took was a few visits to the bar this week, and I had his schedule memorized to a tee."

  "He's never chatty to me," I said.

  "Probably because you're a troublemaker, and I'm an upstanding citizen," Tina said.

  I crossed my arms.

  "At least I'm a better actor," she said. "I liked the dude, it's just that I needed him out of the way in order to steal the diamonds. Timmy had to find a way to be close to the runners without causing suspicion. Then I got the brilliant idea that he could carry a real gun instead of one of them fake ones. Nobody even noticed."

  "Then you poisoned Chad, which forced him to call in sick to the race last night," I said. "Donna then gave the bib to me, and since the runners don't go by any identification except bib numbers and handkerchiefs, they wouldn't realize I wasn't the right person. I'm guessing the runners don't know each other. A way to keep things anonymous."

  "And I bet all the other runners registered with fake names, too," Donna said. "When you think about it, it's quite clever. Small town races like these don't have time to verify names or addresses. We're just happy that people show up."

  "Only thing that went wrong was that you were a little too fast," Tina said. "Timmy tried to nab the diamonds from you during the race, but apparently you just sprinted right on by him." I beamed at the compliment, despite the fact that Tina still held the power in the form of a Taser. "The nature reserve. He tried to grab me then."

  "Yeah, and apparently you were so fast you ran right past the fourth leg and confused the shit out of him. But in the event that something goes wrong during the race, the other members of the Ring just bug out," Tina said. "Which is what the last leg did. It's failproof, don't you see? There's no information on the runners except a false name and a bib entry."

  I glanced at Donna, everything suddenly coming together. Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I'd been part of a sophisticated method of transferring diamonds from one owner to the next, and I hadn't even known about it.

  "Who was on the receiving end for the diamonds?" I asked suddenly. "I bet they're not happy about them disappearing."

  "No kidding," Tina said. "But it's not like they could've called the cops and asked what happened to their stolen diamonds now, is it?"

  Donna shrugged. "How'd you know I'd give the bib to Misty? What if it went to an even faster guy?"

  "Did my research," Tina said calmly. "I had a solid guess you'd give it to one of your kids or the friend you had staying in town. You don't seem like the type to waste a bib entry, and if you handed it off last minute the chances of you handing it to a trained runner in race-shape were
small. Chad and the other runners were hand selected as elite participants. Pretty much anyone would be easier to catch than them. The organizers make their selections carefully."

  "I'm a trained athlete," I said. I didn't mention trained in the art of burlesque. Maybe I didn't run marathons, but it was hard work dancing day in and day out.

  "Whatever. Too late. We've got the diamonds, and now, I gotta get rid of you guys because me and Timmy are gonna get married. We have enough diamonds for a whole wedding, let alone a ring. Probably go to Vegas. I always did wanna get married by Elvis."

  "Not fair," I mumbled. "He didn't even have to run. Plus, you guys will get caught."

  "I don't think so," she said. "I got ways. You didn't catch me, did you? And I was right under your nose."

  "Well, technically we did catch you," I said. "Seeing as how we're all standing here."

  "Well, we won't be for long," she said. "I'm gonna zap you two, and as soon as you're out, we'll be on our way. You don't know either of our real names, so there's no need to kill you. But if you start coming after us or remembering all the details of the story, then I might have to change my mind."

  "Is that a threat?" Donna asked.

  "Of course it's a threat," Tina said, shifting uncomfortably.

  "Hang on a second," Donna said, raising her eyebrow. "You choose fake names, and you went with Tina, Timmy, and Toddy?"

  I watched Donna edge towards the kitchen sink. I knew she was trying to keep Tina talking, but the woman's eyes flashed up before Donna could get anywhere.

  "They got a nice ring to 'em," she said, glancing down at Lance, who groaned. The agent's eyes were shut. There was no way we were getting to his gun. We weren't even getting a knife from the kitchen drawer. Donna and I were stuck.

  "Now let us take our winnings and leave," she said, raising the Taser.

  "I don't think so," said another voice.

  Donna and I glanced at one another. I hadn't noticed the figure creeping up behind Donna, and it took me by as much surprise as it did our captor.

  Chad—or whatever his name was—towered behind Tina. He had a ruddy complexion and the lean build of a runner combined with intimidating height. Tina's mouth opened, but no sound came out. Taking advantage of her shock was a simple matter for Chad, and he reached right over her shoulder and snatched the Taser away.

  "The cops are already out front," he said. "You left my phone in my pocket, so I called while all of you were in the kitchen. I suggest you don't run. And if you start to call out to—"

  "Timmy!" Tina shrieked. Half the word left her mouth before she collapsed to the ground, twitching and screaming, before Chad let up on the Taser. Tina lay in a heap next to Lance, who hardly dared wiggle, even though Tina was in no shape to do much of anything. Chad held the Taser in his hand, as if surprised it had worked when he pulled the trigger.

  "Tina, what's wron—" Timmy, the starter, pushed through the door of the secret room that Tina had talked about, and thankfully Chad didn't waste any time zapping the former starter, who yelled bloody murder as he collapsed.

  A giggle of laughter erupted from the other room, and Donna and I made eye contact with one another. She rushed towards the open door and returned a moment later with little Toddy scooped in her arms, a cute little boy with dark curly hair. He was busy crashing little Hot Wheels trucks into one another while Donna held him close.

  Meanwhile, I rushed towards Lance and untied him, removing the sock from his mouth. Together, Lance and I bound Tina with the rope before Lance snapped handcuffs on Timmy.

  "Thanks for the car clue, Sherlock," I said, directing my comment at Toddy. I stood up and joined Donna, tickling the little boy's foot and glancing at his Hot Wheels. I looked up at Chad. "And thank you for helping us out. What is your role in this?"

  Chad looked sheepish. "They promised it was legal, I swear. Oh, and the cops aren't here yet. I lied. Someone should call them."

  "Who promised it was legal? I asked. "What was legal?"

  "I got a slip delivered under my door a few weeks ago asking if I wanted to participate in a relay. I thought it was a scam at first because they offered to pay me a thousand bucks to carry a little package for half a mile. It's not like I'm wallowing in money around here," he said, gesturing towards the sparse house. "So I signed up."

  "This is your house?" I asked.

  "My name isn't Chad like you thought, it's Harry, but I do live here. This isn't a fake address—the house is registered to me—you can check. I only wrote Chad on my form because the lady I talked to—the one whose number was on the registration form—told me to use a fake name."

  "And you weren't suspicious when some lady asked you to sign up for a 5K under a fake name and carry a small baggie of something between two runners?" I asked, hearing the disbelieving tone in my own voice.

  "Well jeez, when you put it like that," Harry said, heavy on the sarcasm. Rolling his eyes, he shrugged. "Of course I thought it was sketchy. But the lady who called told me it was a no-strings-attached plan. Nobody had ever gotten in trouble, and as long as I didn't open the package, I hadn't done anything wrong."

  "So you were just supposed to run the race, get a package from one man, and give it to another. Then they'd pay you a grand?" I asked.

  Harry nodded. "I needed the money—I promise—just don't arrest me. The mortgage is cheap here, but I've been laid off for a year."

  "You don't have to justify it to me," I said. "I'm just trying to figure out what happened."

  Harry glanced down. "Yeah well, I don't really know what happened after that. Last night I came down with a nasty, nasty bug, sometime after my normal meal of a burrito and coke. I thought it was just the typical pre-race jitters. You know how it goes. Sometimes the bowels get a bit nervous before an event. I've done enough of 'em to know. But this was something completely different. I'd lost about ten pounds of water weight last night, and thought I'd have to go to the hospital. That's when I called in sick."

  I nodded, hoping he'd continue but skip over the nitty gritty details of his stomach issues.

  "Then this morning, these two show up here. They knocked me right out as I opened the door. Caught me by surprise, plus I was weak from puking all night. Otherwise they wouldn't have stood a chance," he said, taking a moment to flex his biceps.

  Donna rolled her eyes.

  With a sheepish grin, Chad continued. "After that I guess they just set up shop here, though I don't remember it. I was out cold most of the day, just waking up now when I heard you guys. First time I haven't been puking since last night," he said. Crossing his arms, he peeked at us through guilt-ridden eyes. "I'm not in trouble, am I?"

  "I don't know," I said. "Not for me to decide. But on the positive, I don't think you did anything wrong. Technically."

  "Plus, it's got to give you bonus points that you helped us and an FBI agent out. Without you here, they might have gotten away," Donna pointed out.

  "True," Harry said, his expression brightening.

  "But I'd steer clear of sketchy sign-up forms from now on," Donna said, taking on her scolding tone of voice. "It's not safe."

  Harry gave a salute. "Yes, ma'am. Lesson learned."

  "So the cops aren't actually here?" I asked.

  "No, I'll call them now," he said with a sigh. "It's my house, after all. I suppose I should come clean."

  I gave an encouraging nod, noting that Lance was too busy glaring at Tina and Timmy to say much of anything. But the way he cocked his head towards us, it was clear he was listening to the conversation.

  "Well this guy's a cutie," Donna cooed, tickling Toddy's chin. "I wonder what will happen to him when mom's arrested." She glanced up, then back towards the baby. "Don't worry, buddy, we'll make sure you're taken care of as best we can."

  In response, Toddy zoomed a Hot Wheels car into the wall as fast as possible. He stood up, leaving the cars in a pile of wreckage, one wheel still spinning on top.

  * * *

  "How can yo
u leave after all this excitement?" Donna asked. "Stay and solve mysteries with me!"

  "You have kids to get back to, and I have…" I hesitated. I had a list of things I could say, but none of them were particularly convincing. Instead, I leaned over from the passenger's seat of my best friend's van and squeezed her close to my chest.

  In the end, everything had mostly worked out. Harry had been slapped on the wrist and instructed to steer clear of get-rich-quick schemes, but nobody had the heart to sincerely punish him after he'd saved Donna and me from some electrical jolts at the hand of Tina. The Drotz family had also been taken care of, including the baby. I'd heard that he had an estranged grandmother who was actually quite normal, and she was more than happy to care for Toddy as the babe's parents sorted out their own issues…behind bars.

  The Running Ring itself had turned out to be an organization that extended much higher than our tiny Minnesotan town, and in fact was the reason Lance had been around in the first place. There'd been rumors the Ring would be active at Hot Dog Days, and he'd been sent to investigate. It was safe to say he hadn't been disappointed.

  Though the FBI had a ways to go before they'd be able to locate all the top dogs of the operation, Lance assured me that Donna's and my help had been integral to his investigation, and that he'd gotten plenty of leads he'd be following up on. I suspected that all he'd gotten from Donna and me was a good laugh, but he insisted he'd never have gotten the chance to question Harry, Tina, and Timmy if it weren't for our involvement.

  As a thank you, he'd bought Donna's and my dinner before my flight, saying it was the least he could do. Donna had accidentally programmed my number into his cell phone and made him promise to call. I had cowered in silence, secretly basking in the knowledge of just how far Donna would go to see me happy.

  When we separated from the hug, her pretty eyes were damp and her cute bob a bit ruffled from my slightly aggressive good-bye hug.

  "I'll be back soon," I promised.