Hidden Sins

by Bolton, Karice

  “Oh, umm. I’m not sure what my schedule is, but—”

  “No pressure. If you’re free, just let me know.” She smiled and took a sip of water, her eyes analyzing me. “Don’t take this the wrong way…”

  I started laughing. “I’ll try not to.”

  “But I don’t see you working at Buttons either.”

  My heart started pounding. I needed that job, but if she was able to sniff out my fear and apprehension this easily, how was I going to fake my way through it with the members or whatever they were called?

  I shrugged and grinned. “Only time will tell, I guess.”

  “Now, do you know what you’re going to wear?” she asked.

  I shrugged. I’d been wracking my brain trying to figure it out. “I was thinking like an oversized button-down shirt?”

  “That would be different.” She nodded.

  “Like different bad?” I asked, grinning.

  “No. Just different. But I think a lot of guys are into that whole boyfriend shirt thing. So maybe you’ll start a new trend at the club.”

  “Well, I guess I’ll find out.”

  “Baby steps, huh?” Her smile knowing.

  I nodded. “More like infant crawls.” I took the last bite of ginger beef that was on my plate and tamped down the worry about tomorrow.

  I walked to the sink and rinsed my plate off before placing it in the dishwasher. Mia was right behind me and did the same.

  “Ready to tour Fort Knox?” she laughed. “I would’ve mentioned it when I was interviewing you, but I didn’t want to scare you off.”

  I laughed and followed her down the stairs to the first floor where she proceeded to show me every tip and trick for securing the premises. By the time we reached the third floor, I knew the only person who would secure a house like this was someone who had a very important reason to do so.

  “Did something happen to make your brother so…” my voice trailed off.

  We were standing in the hallway, and she was about to show me her bedroom and her studio. She glanced behind her and then her gaze focused on me before she crossed her arms and nodded slowly.

  “Yeah. There’s a reason,” she confirmed, but didn’t say anything more.

  That was when I wondered how many of us were running from something? And would there ever be something worth running to?

  Luke

  I pulled into the parking lot of Buttons and found a spot. It was twenty minutes to closing, but I had to find out if she was there. I looked in the mirror and smoothed my hair back. I had no idea what I planned on saying if she was, but I just wanted to know if she was inside, if she was safe.

  That was bullshit. I wanted to see her again. I stepped out of the Tesla and closed the door before walking over to the entrance. The bouncer at the door gave me a quick nod of recognition as he opened the door for me. The club was packed with men, drinking and chatting up the servers. I glanced up and saw Liv, one of the more friendly waitresses, swinging above. This was not a place for Hannah.

  “Never would’ve guessed you’d be here,” Sean’s voice called out over the pulsing beat of the music. “Making your semi-annual trek into Buttons, huh? You usually warn me.” Sean punched my shoulder with his free hand as he took a swig of his beer with the other.

  “Looks just like I remember,” I said, my gaze scanning the crowd. “New hire on tonight?”

  “Barbie? No. She’s coming on tomorrow.”

  Hearing Sean refer to Hannah as Barbie irked me. It didn’t help to see the expressions on the faces around the club as the men watched their servers. It made my anger rise again and push out all of the logical reasons why Buttons would be a good fit for Hannah, for someone in hiding.

  “Do you really think it’s a good idea to break the formula by adding a blond. You’ve got something going on here that people respond to. Why mess with success?”

  “There’s something special about her. Something innocent. I swear she alone could double the initiation fee.”

  “Really.” I folded my arms and attempted to push down the anger, only to have it rise.

  He was right. There was something very innocent about Hannah, which was why this place made absolutely no sense for her to work.

  “The theme tonight?” I asked, ignoring Sean’s gaze.

  “What’s up? You look like you’re ready to pulverize anyone who gets too close to you…”

  “The theme?” I asked again.

  “Wonderland. But seriously, dude. What’s going on? Is it Jessica?”

  Oh, yeah. I was supposed to be heartbroken. At least it was a handy excuse.

  I nodded. “Called things off with her.”

  “No shit? I never saw that coming.” Sean whistled lowly. “Are you sure about that? It’s not often you find a woman who thinks like a man. She seemed like a good fit. No strings attached.”

  I laughed and squeezed Sean’s shoulder. “There are always strings attached, especially with women. Hers just hadn’t reared its ugly head yet. Needed to cut it off before it did.” I pointed at Sean’s beer. “How about I have one of those. We’ve only got a few minutes before last call, anyhow.”

  Sean nodded as we walked up to the bar and I got my own drink.

  “Look who decided to show up.” I heard Liv’s voice crawl up my spine as I spun around to greet her. She must have just climbed down from the swing. She was dressed in a short, black slip and wore a bunny tail attached to the hem, I assumed to match the Wonderland theme, but she was no white rabbit. It was hard not to start laughing so I glanced over at the bartender as she slid on the stool next to me. I really didn’t get this club. “What brought you in?” she asked, her eyes curious.

  Liv glanced at Sean before her eyes landed back on mine.

  “Thought I should show up every once in a while, especially when Sean decides to throw out his brunettes-only rule.”

  “I always thought it was a dumb rule in the first place,” Liv said, touching Sean’s chin. She’d always had a thing for Sean, but neither of them ever acted on it for obvious reasons. “She’s gorgeous. I’m actually the one who brought her in.”

  “Was it easy to convince her?” I asked, clenching my fists as I waited for the answer.

  “Not at all. I could tell she wasn’t from around here since she was so oblivious. But she seemed enticed by the money. I mean, who wouldn’t be. But still... I was surprised that she showed up tonight. She was really worried that this place was too good to be true,” Liv laughed, and I took a sip of the beer. “But I promised her there wasn’t anything compromising going on. That you guys take care of us.”

  I hated being lumped in with this place.

  “I guess that’s subjective,” I muttered, watching the men slowly begin to exit the club. The waitresses still flirted with them on the way out, leaving them with that false sense of reality.

  “Right, man. Cause you’re above it all?” Sean’s brow arched and Liv started chuckling.

  “One thing I’ve learned since starting here is that no man is above anything. You just haven’t found your kryptonite,” Liv smiled at me and then at Sean, before slipping off the stool.

  “Don’t count on it.”

  “Well, the new hire will be in tomorrow. I’m training her. You should stop by.”

  “He never has before. I doubt he’ll start now,” Sean replied as Liv walked away.

  “There’s always a first,” I muttered, pushing my unfinished beer away for the bartender to deal with. “Listen, it sounds like you’ve got your reasons for hiring her, but—” I stopped myself.

  “Why do I think you’re not telling me something?” Sean asked.

  Now was not the time to get into it.

  “I’m out. I’ll see ya tomorrow.” I shrugged and walked away.

  “Two days in a row? I think this Jessica thing is bothering you more than you’re letting on.” Sean called after me.

  When I got to my car, I saw a new text on my cell from my sister, which wasn’t
unlike her. She was a night owl just like me. She said her inspiration didn’t even start to come until after five in the evening.

  Forgot to mention. I’ve got a new roommate.

  Why did she have such an incessant need to get a roommate? I texted back a quick reply and took off for my house.

  Of course you do. Hope it works out better than the last one. And the one before that.

  Since I was still supposed to be in New England, my schedule was already cleared, and I’d be able to get a lot done surrounding Hannah’s case. I was itching to get more of my people on it.

  Exactly! Hannah’s case. That was how I needed to think about it. She was nothing more than a person who needed help, a new case, and I intended to keep it that way.

  A new text came in from my sister, and I directed the car to read the text aloud. The car promptly obeyed.

  She’s a new hire at Buttons. I think it’s a good fit. Plus, she looks like she could use a friend.

  You’ve got to be shitting me. I turned my car onto the Pacific Coast Highway and continued driving toward my house, fighting the overwhelming urge to turn the car around and show up at my sister’s house. If Hannah was in danger that meant anyone she was around would be in danger, and I wasn’t going to let that happen. I’d lost too much, too early, to let it happen again. My fists gripped the steering wheel as I drove toward home, wondering how I would take care of this latest problem.

  Hannah

  After spending all day worrying about when Donald Jamison would be let out, I finally made myself concentrate on getting ready for my first day on the job. Mia had been in her studio all day, which left me plenty of time to unpack and get situated. Regardless of how long I planned on staying or not staying, I was certain Mia would figure things out pretty quickly if I left all the cardboard boxes locked, loaded, and ready to go. I glanced at the clock, knowing it was time to walk over to the club. What I was experiencing was far beyond first-day jitters, but I couldn’t back out now.

  I had my bag all packed and was ready to go. I locked the front door behind me and felt the warmth of the air cascade over my skin. California weather was amazing. After being locked up with air-conditioning all day, it was nice to be outside with the gentle sea breeze blowing softly. This life, imaginary as it might seem, was something I valued. It gave me hope. It told me what my life could be like someday. As long as I had hope, things would be okay.

  I wandered the sidewalk, noticing the cafes and noting which boutiques would be fun to go to when I had a little cash. Once I reached Buttons, I punched in the code and opened the front door.

  “Hey, Hannah,” the bartender waved. It was the same guy from the day before. I decided I better make friends since he seemed to know my name, yet I knew nothing about him.

  “Hey,” I said, placing my bag on the cherrywood bar. He gave me a quick handshake and smiled.

  “I’m Kevin,” he replied. “If you ever need anything, I’m your guy.”

  I started laughing.

  “That sounded cheesy, didn’t it?” His deep grin showed off the sharpness of his features. He was good-looking with his dark hair and deep-set brown eyes, but meeting Kevin reminded me of my reaction to Luke, and my non-reaction to Kevin, which was similar to the reaction I had toward my fiancé. But at least I wouldn’t have to worry about Luke anymore since I’d left the last place he knew where to find me.

  “It could’ve been worse,” I assured him. “So how long have you been working here?”

  “Two years. There are three other male bartenders, but I’m the best looking.”

  I laughed harder and his gaze steadied on mine. “Another bad one, huh?”

  I shrugged. “They could be fabulous lines for all I know. I’ve been out of the dating world for far too long to know.”

  “Really?” He looked puzzled as he flipped a bar towel over his shoulder. “You’ve got a boyfriend?”

  I shook my head. “No. I was engaged.”

  At least that sounded halfway normal.

  “Oh,” he nodded. “Did you…he…”

  “I broke it off.” I smiled.

  Kevin leaned over the bar and smiled. “Listen, if you have any questions don’t hesitate to ask me or anyone behind the bar. We hear and see everything from our vantage point.” He tapped the beer tap and pulled back and smiled.

  “Thanks. I’ll remember that. Now I guess I better go and get ready for my first shift,” I said.

  “Is that my girl?” Liv hollered from the other side of the room. “Get your butt down here before the doors open.”

  My stomach immediately went into a free fall as I waved and hurried over to Liv. This was it. I’d finally get to see what everything was about inside these walls. I glanced up at the swing and wanted to kick myself.

  Why did I look up?

  “So you got your outfit for tonight?” she asked, pulling me down the hallway.

  “I do.” I didn’t want to tell her what it was for fear of it being vetoed.

  “Well, make it snappy and we’ll get through this. The first night is always the hardest.” She swung open the door and led me to a corner vanity and small closet. “This will be where you can get ready. Although it looks like you’re all already to go, except for your clothes.”

  “Yeah, I did my makeup at home.”

  Liv smiled and nodded. “Awesome. So you’ll be working my tables tonight, and I’ll be right there with you every step of the way.”

  I placed my bag on the chair and looked at Liv, hoping she’d get the hint. She didn’t. I opened my bag and turned my back to Liv as I pulled my dress over my head. I was in one of the few matching lingerie sets that I owned, which even though it was matching was more toward cotton comfy than lacy racy. I said a silent prayer that Liv wouldn’t notice and slipped the button-down over my head. I quickly buttoned up the shirt and turned around to see Liv, her mouth gaping.

  “This is brilliant. Why didn’t I ever think of this? The men are going to love it.” She reached over and unbuttoned a couple of the buttons up top where I had just securely fastened them and smiled. “There. All better.” Then her eyes dropped to the bra that was edging out from under the white cotton. Her mouth went into a disapproving pout, followed by a huff. “At least it’s black.”

  “Exactly,” I agreed.

  Liv took a step back to give me a once over, and my fingers immediately pulled down at the hem of the shirt, trying to stretch it to my mid-thigh area.

  “That’s a no-no,” Liv said. “No fidgeting.”

  “Sorry. Things are just breezy.”

  Liv laughed and glanced at the clock on the wall. “We’ve got fifteen minutes before the members can start to arrive. Tonight might be a little slow, which will be good for you.”

  I reached into my bag and grabbed the water I’d brought along, taking a swallow. “Thank you so much for telling me about this opportunity, by the way.”

  “Hopefully you’ll still be thanking me after your first shift.”

  I was startled by her honesty but couldn’t help crack a smile as I began to feel a little less anxious.

  “Believe me. We all go through the first week jitters. I remember I was always on-guard, thinking that something awful was going to happen or that something more was expected of me that I wouldn’t be comfortable with. But that never happened and to this day, I’ve never felt bad about my time working here. Think of it as Hooters for wannabe millionaires.”

  I nodded and put my water back in the bag before following her out. The music had just turned on, and I was shocked at how quickly the club had changed. It felt far more intimate but strange.

  “Tonight’s theme is the Phantom of the Opera.”

  “There are themes?” I looked around trying to see how the Phantom fit in with what the room had transformed into. The curtains surrounding certain booths had been changed out to black velvet, and there were large floral arrangements placed around the club, but the theme was lost on me.

  She nodded
. “It keeps things fresh. See over there?” She pointed to the corner. “It’s subtle.”

  I saw nothing that referenced anything to do with the Phantom. Instead, I was looking at a huge ice sculpture that was meant to look like something, but I had no idea what. It spilt onto a glass table where shot glasses and rose petals were scattered.

  “I don’t get it,” I said, turning back to Liv. “How is this the Phantom at all?”

  Liv laughed and motioned for me to follow her over to the table. As I got closer to the sculpture, I recognized a man’s face covered with a mask carved into the ice.

  “Oh, okay,” I said, nodding. “That’s kind of stretching it.”

  “We all have to wear a mask.” She smiled.

  “Seriously? The whole night?” I asked.

  Liv twisted her lips, scanning across the room. “Yup.”

  Knowing that I’d be able to hide under a partial mask made me start to feel less exposed and more at ease. I could do this. At least tonight I could do this. All I could do was take it one day at a time.

  “So follow my lead. We take drink orders, food orders, and we stop to listen, to chat with the members. You need to learn to read their moods, their expressions,” Liv replied. “Our job is part server and part listener. One thing I’ve learned is that men don’t necessarily want to discuss things that are bothering them. Meaning they don’t want to hear our take on the matter. They just want to vent and take a swig of whisky.”

  I nodded, worrying that there was still something more behind this job than she was letting on, but I guess only time would tell. I also liked to think that men were more complex than Liv’s assessment. As I glanced around the club, I focused on the fact that only members would be in here tonight. This was one of the safest jobs for a person in my predicament, and I needed to quit worrying needlessly. I could handle this.