by Marian Tee
I wish he was like Angelo.
He was a much better man…
The words repeated itself inside Derek’s mind, and all of it left an acid taste on his tongue. She wished he was like Angelo? Bullshit. If that was true, she would never have fallen apart so easily in his arms last night. If that was true, she would never have let him call her his. If that was fucking true, this passion between them – this drugging, all-consuming, obsessive passion – it would have died the moment she said ‘yes’ to another man and turned her back on him.
Angelo Valencia III might be a better man than Derek, with the way he was so fucking correct at all times, but he sure as hell knew Angelo could never be the man Jaike wanted and needed.
Derek, and only Derek, could be that man.
His hooded gaze went to Jaike, and his chest squeezed at how pale she looked. Stubborn, stubborn woman. It was so fucking clear what she wanted to do. Her eyes were begging him for forgiveness, her body quivering in her effort not to go to him. Why was she so damn stubborn?
Around him, his friends were silent, all of them able to read between the lines and patiently waiting for their cue from him.
Your call, his friends’ stances were telling him. Did he want them to forget this? Remember this? Make it awkward for the girl standing so stiffly in front of them?
Finally, Derek said, “Jaike.”
Tears stung Jaike’s eyes as she heard Derek say her name. Why did she feel so damn happy just because he had said her name? Slowly, she clutched her chest, not liking the way her heart throbbed so painfully against it.
She had just shamed him in front of his friends. Didn’t he know that? Shouldn’t he be punishing her now? Shouldn’t he be leaving her now?
When Derek no longer said anything, she couldn’t help it. “What is it?” Oh God, she sounded so militant – so irritated when she knew she was the one who was wrong.
He said quietly, “Just take it back.”
She stared at him, stricken.
“That’s all you have to do, baby. Take it back and admit the truth.”
Desperately, she searched his gaze for a sign of deception. He couldn’t mean it. No man could be as forgiving as him. No Master…no Dom could let her mistake go just like that.
But when she looked into his blue-gray eyes, all she could see was the truth.
And something else, something she was too terrified to name.
Jaike tried to make her throat work, but the words just couldn’t come out. Anytime now, she thought numbly. Anytime now and he would punish her, would shout at her for being fickle, would hurt her—
But Derek did none of those.
Instead, he simply turned away.
She started to cry silently. She wanted to call him back so badly. I’m sorry, please, come back, forgive me. I’m begging you. Please come back—
But memories of Diana were playing in her mind again, working like a cage that kept the words locked inside her throat, never to be spoken.
“Jaike?”
When she looked up, she found herself staring up at Christien di Luca. She expected to see judgment or even disgust and fury in his gaze, and she wouldn’t have blamed him. But instead, she saw…sympathy.
It made her cry harder.
Behind him, she saw that Derek was too far away to hear her now. She would have to shout if she wanted him to hear her. His other friends were with him, Reid Chalkias and Nick Christakos, and both of them were as silent as he was as they walked away.
When Christien saw where Jaike was looking, he asked quietly, “Do you want me to call him back for you?”
She shook her head, still crying. No matter how much she wanted to say yes, she knew that it was something she alone should do.
“If it makes any difference…I had never heard Derek happier than when he called us last night about moving in with you.”
The words made Jaike want to sink to her knees and bawl her eyes out.
“I don’t know exactly what he feels for you, but one thing I am certain of – you matter to him, more than anything else.”
****
“And you haven’t heard from him since then?” Marcy whispered, wide-eyed. Both of them were seated at the bleachers, having finished doing their laps.
Jaike shook her head. “Not a peep.” She, too, whispered, knowing that everywhere she went, there were always people looking and trying to listen in on her conversations. It was something she was slowly getting used to.
“You’re not going to apologize and take it back?”
“Why should I?” She shrugged, trying but failing to sound indifferent. “It’s his fault for eavesdropping.”
Marcy only raised a brow.
The look made her feel even more defensive, and she huddled more deeply under the terry robe she wore over her swimsuit. “What am I going to apologize for?” Jaike couldn’t meet her friend’s gaze as she uttered the words, knowing it for the lie it was.
Below them, the other students in their class were starting to leave, with only a handful left in the pool. Even their swimming coach was gathering her stuff from the front-row bleachers, and the sight of it made Jaike feel depressed. This was her last class for the day, and after it she had nowhere to go back to except home.
Funny how her home no longer felt like hers now.
Derek only had to spend one night in it and just like that, the place already felt like his.
“Why do you bother lying to yourself? You miss him and you regret hurting him like that.”
Marcy’s knowing words made her jolt, but Jaike denied them automatically, “I don’t miss him. I am sorry that he had to hear something like that, but I don’t miss him. I don’t.” When she glanced back at her friend, she saw Marcy glaring at her.
“Stop pretending to be so dense – and stop acting like you regret nothing. You messed up. We both know that. We also both know you know what you should say.” When Jaike still didn’t say anything, Marcy pressed on. “Just think about how you would feel if you heard Derek say the same thing—”
Jaike pointed out reasonably, “He wouldn’t have anything to compare to. He didn’t have a girlfriend before me.”
Marcy’s glare intensified. “Oh my God, Jaike, I swear, if you use that lawyer logic of yours on me—”
Jaike shrugged. “I’m not a lawyer yet.”
Whipping off the bath towel she had around her bikini-clad body, Marcy made a move to hit her friend with it.
Jaike immediately scooted away. “All right, I’m sorry! I know what you mean!” But Marcy hit her anyway, making Jaike yelp.
“I’ve always known you were stubborn, but you were never this insanely pigheaded,” Marcy muttered in disgust.
Jaike’s elbows dropped to her knees as she covered her face. “I can’t help it,” she said in a muffled voice. “I panicked, okay? You already warned me about not freaking out, but I did anyway. Everything about my past came back to me…” She exhaled deeply. “We only had one night together, Marcy. One night and…he decided to move in with me the next day. Before that, he even gave me something…something that would let people know he owns me.”
Just the thought was enough to have her shudder.
Derek Christopoulos owning her?
God, it was both a dream and nightmare come true.
“And the most horrible thing about all of it,” Jaike whispered, “is that everything made me feel excited.”
She waited for Marcy to say a word, but there was nothing. Worried that her confession had made her only close friend disgusted with her, Jaike uncovered her face—
She gasped. “Derek?”
Chapter Four
What was it about Jaike Hepburn that made him want to kiss her and strangle her at the same time?
It was a question Derek had a feeling he would ask time and time again, no matter how many years they’d spend in each other’s lives. A question he ultimately looked forward to having a reason to ask every day.
Looking back
at Jaike, the urge to strangle her was slowly overpowering his urge to kiss her and never let her go.
The past few days had been a blur, with Derek nursing his hurt pride over bottle after bottle. His friends had kept him company, but it was clear in all their gazes they thought he was running away from his problems.
When he had resurfaced from his days-old hangover, he knew they were right.
The first time he had met Jaike, he had known right away she would not be easy to win over. And even so, he had gone after her. Had patiently and determinedly done his best to make himself a permanent fixture in her mind, body, and heart for three fucking years. After all that he had sacrificed for this girl, would he really give up just like that?
When his friends had seen him show up in school sober for the first time in days, they had all laughed, and even the normally serious Nathan Callis had ribbed him about it.
“You do know that this proves she’s got you by the balls, don’t you?” the usually quiet model had asked.
He retorted, “At least I don’t have to squeeze my balls into a tiny pair of panties like some pretty boy here.”
But it had only made Nathan laugh and clap Derek on the back. “Good luck, man. If what the others have told me is true, I’m guessing you’ll need it.”
Looking at the way Jaike was staring at him right now with narrowed eyes, Derek knew his friend was right.
Jaike couldn’t believe Derek was really here. Was he real or was it her mind playing tricks on her because she was missing him too much? Imaginary or real, this Derek next to her taking Marcy’s place was even more gorgeous than she allowed herself to remember. Black hair beautifully tousled, eyes the shade of blue-gray clouds, and his sleek, hard body clothed in something that would have looked too fancy on most other men.
He was perfect, in other words, and if he was real—
If he was really here—
She jabbed his shoulder, hard.
He grunted in pain.
She pulled her hand back as if burned.
He was real!
And he really was perfect, not just in looks. He was perfect also where it counted – or at least he was a better person than she was. The words made Jaike bite her lip hard. Those were the very words she had used when describing Angelo. How ironic that it was something she could use to describe Derek when comparing him…to herself.
“What are you doing here?” She wanted to face-palm herself at the tone of her voice, her defensiveness making her sound sharp.
Derek asked evenly, “What do you think?”
She shrugged.
Yes, he really was close to strangling her, Derek thought, torn between amusement and exasperation.
Jaike looked around – anywhere but Derek was good. And that was when she realized something.
“Where’s everybody?” Why had she just noticed it was just the two of them in the entire pool area? There was not a single student around, not even anyone from maintenance. Her head snapped to Derek as she demanded, “Where’s Marcy?”
“She saw me coming and thought it was better to leave us alone.”
“And the others?”
He said innocently, “They thought the same thing.”
“All of them?”
It was his turn to shrug.
So they really were alone then? A shiver ran down her spine at the realization, but it wasn’t out of fear – and that was what scared her. Tearing her gaze away from Derek, she quickly stood up and started shoving her stuff back inside her gym bag. “I have to leave, too,” she mumbled.
Jaike had already turned and taken a step away when Derek caught her wrist from behind. His touch burned, making her freeze and hold her breath. Such a small percentage of her body was under his fingers and yet it felt like her whole being was focused on that tiny part. Why did it feel like only that part of her body was alive and the rest of her that Derek wasn’t touching was left for dead?
Behind her, Derek asked quietly, “Don’t you want to end this now, baby?”
The term of endearment caught her off guard. Not looking at him, she choked out, “Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why are you still so nice to me after what you heard me say?” She squeezed her eyes shut in shame. “After what I did to you in front of your friends?”
Derek tightened his hold around her wrist. “Because,” he said slowly, emphatically, “I knew you knew that it wasn’t true. Because I knew it was just your fear, maybe even your pride, talking.”
Her softness, her nearness, was driving him crazy and unable to resist it, he started stroking her hand, his thumb rubbing rhythmically against her knuckles. “I knew I was pushing you too far by wanting to move in with you right away. I knew I was pushing you too far by wanting you to wear my chain. And I knew I was pushing you too far when I wanted you to admit in front of my friends that it was really me you wanted.”
The tears began when Derek started speaking, and when he was done, the tears were falling furiously. She was the one who had wronged him, but he was the one who was practically apologizing to her.
Surely a Dom wasn’t supposed to do something like that for a Sub?
Or at least not a Dom like him…for a Sub like her?
When Derek tugged her hand to whirl her around and face him, she didn’t even think of refusing. When their gazes met, Derek asked quietly, “Could you say it now?” His other hand moved, and she watched with her breath in her throat as he reached for the knot of her bathrobe. One yank, and the bathrobe was unknotted. His other hand let her wrist go so he could take off the robe from her body.
And she let him.
She found herself no longer caring that they were in a public place, that anytime someone might enter and see them together, see what they were doing—
None of it mattered – not when Derek, her Dom, her owner, was looking at her like that.
She bit her lip when her robe fell soundlessly to the floor.
“Could you say it now, baby? Say what you’re feeling here.” Derek placed his hand above her heart.
The words entranced her, terrified her, and above all, they humbled her for Derek should never have had to say them in the first place. Because of her mother, Jaike had known a lot of Doms in her life. And none of them – God, none of them had been like Derek.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for saying those things. I’m sorry for lying.” She covered the hand he held to her chest with her own. “You were right. Everything you said was right. I didn’t mean a word I said.”
Triumph that felt both tender and savage burst inside his chest. He wanted to haul Jaike into his arms, but he knew he couldn’t let it end there. For both their sakes, he had to demand more or she would forever be taking one step forward, two steps back with their relationship.
“And what?” he demanded roughly. “Say it all, Jaike. This time, say it all.” When he saw her lips quiver, he knew she understood him.
“There’s no better man for me than you—”
The rest of her words were swallowed by his possessive kiss. Shock had her gasping against his lips but even so, she was already weaving her arms around his neck, her body molding pliantly against his. Passion and relief rocked inside her, making Jaike cry even as she returned his passionate kiss with equal fervor.
The first time she had met Derek Christopoulos, she had known right away that there was no man worse than him for her. Now, maybe it was time to acknowledge the other side of the coin. Now, maybe it was time for her to accept that there could be no better man for her other than Derek Christopoulos.
Without breaking their kiss, Derek swept her up in his arms and made his way to the pool. “Close your eyes.”
At the command, Jaike immediately closed her eyes, not even thinking of disobeying her Dom this time. After everything she had done to him, after everything he had done for her, she was ready to give him almost anything.
She felt herself being lowered. “Stay still.”
“Y
es.”
Moments passed and then she was being swept up in his arms once more. Jaike gasped when her bare arms brushed against muscled arms that were just as bare. When he pressed her tightly against his body, her swimsuit-covered breasts were flattened against his naked chest.
Nervously, she asked, “May I open my eyes now?”
“Not yet.” He carried her into the pool, using the steps at the shallow end. Jaike’s gasp of surprise had him smiling. “You can open your eyes now.” She did so right away and when she gazed at him in bewilderment, he said with a wicked smile, “Did you really think I would not punish you for what you did?”
Jaike’s mouth opened and closed. That was a very good question, and she was such an idiot for not thinking about it.
Lowering her when the water reached their waists, he continued, “You had us waste days, baby. Precious days that we could have spent together. That deserves a punishment, don’t you think?”
Chapter Five
Derek expected her to say no, to try to bolt or even look at him in fear. But he should have known his Jaike would do something entirely courageous and unexpected.
Her eyes meeting his, she whispered, “Yes,” and then she bowed her head like a properly obedient Sub.
Just like that, and his cock was hard and throbbing, the lapping water around it having absolutely no effect on his erection.
“Look at me,” he commanded.
Trembling, Jaike raised her gaze to Derek’s.
“Take off your swimsuit.”
She gasped. “But what if…” She looked around them fearfully.
He said quietly, “If you truly trust me, then you would know I’d never do anything to abuse your trust.” In truth, he had his bodyguards stationed around the pool area, three feet away from the doors. No one would be able to get in without having a gun pointed at their heads. He had been that strict in his command to assure his privacy and Jaike’s.
But all of that, his beautiful stubborn Sub was not supposed to know. Not until she learned to yield to him as she should.