What is Hidden

by Skidmore, Lauren

  Shaking my head, I said, “No. There are a lot of strings. Sometimes we have to give her a hand. Sometimes we have to force her hand. And sometimes, we have to take things out of her hands.”

  The music stopped then, though we’d already stopped dancing. The conductor announced the musicians would be taking a short break, but my eyes were solely on Aiden’s.

  “Evie,” he whispered, resting his forehead against mine. I closed my eyes, relishing the feeling of him being so close to me and the brush of his breath as it fluttered across my cheek. Our hands lowered from the dance position to rest at our sides, our fingers intertwined.

  When I opened my eyes, Aiden was staring at me with such . . . resolution and determination. We were silent for a long moment as the party continued to swell around us.

  “I need to tell you something,” he finally said. “Walk with me?”

  “Of course,” I answered, puzzled, and then followed him out the door.

  =

  TWENTY-FOUR

  +

  Aiden led me outside and into the gardens. We passed the place where the bonfire had been the previous night as evidenced by the immense pile of ashes and wet timber. Several other guests were out here, enjoying the crisp autumn night air, but Aiden ignored them all, determinedly leading me by the path to the destination that only he knew.

  He walked with such surety, I had to ask him if he knew where he was going or if he was just faking it to impress me.

  He laughed dryly, saying, “Yes, I know this place very well. Don’t worry, I won’t get us lost or in trouble.”

  I hadn’t even thought about us getting in trouble. “Trouble?” I asked, suddenly nervous. “Why would we be getting in trouble? Where are you planning on taking me? Is this the part where you take me out back where no one can hear me scream and kill me?”

  I was joking, but the slight stumble in his step really made me anxious.

  “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not going to kill you. Or hurt you in any way, before you ask.”

  “Okay, seriously, though. Where are we going? My feet are starting to hurt.”

  Really, I was pulling that card? When did I get to be such a weakling? Barely a few hours in these fancy clothes and I was turning into one of those spoiled courtiers.

  He cast a sidelong glance at me, probably wondering the same thing. “Sorry, went too far there, huh?” I said weakly. “I’m just impatient.”

  “We’re almost there,” was all he said.

  I thought he was going to take us to some hidden place in the gardens or back out in the city, but I was wrong. The palace bordered the forest on the north side, and apparently, that was where we were heading. This forest had been around longer than the city itself, and the trees were ancient, easily hundreds of years old. Not too many people ventured into them, because it was extremely easy to get lost amid the giant oaks, especially if you were unfamiliar with the area or the night sky. Not that you could do much navigation by the stars, unless you were to climb up the trees to see beyond the leafy forest rooftop.

  “Are you positive you know where you’re going?” I asked anxiously.

  “One hundred and ten percent,” he replied readily. “Relax, Evie. I just want some place private to talk, and the palace doesn’t have a place where we’d be comfortable.”

  “What about my room? That’s always worked before.”

  “Yes, but before, you weren’t dressed like the real lady you are. I can slip in and out of certain passageways to make my way down, but I doubt you could in that gown. Besides, I have something to show you.”

  He had a fair point. And I didn’t want to risk using the royal family’s room again, especially when I knew it had to be nearing midnight, when the prince made his grand announcement and revelation.

  As we marched through the underbrush, I knew we were getting closer when I heard a soft scuffling noise. I turned to him in alarm, but he just grinned at me in that way that said he knew something I didn’t. “We’re almost there.”

  Finally, we came to a stop before a large oak tree. I think fifteen men could have encircled it, standing with their arms outstretched. But what really caught my attention was the familiar little brown dog, loosely tied to a stake in the ground.

  “Is that . . . ?” I began. “Did you find Hachi?”

  Aiden beamed at me, looking proud of himself, and my heart felt like it was going to burst. I didn’t know what to say or do. I didn’t know if I should hug him or the dog first, and I didn’t know how Aiden had pulled it off.

  The little Akita yelped happily and, jumping around, tried to pounce on me, his entire back end wagging so hard I thought he might fall over. I knelt carefully, trying not to muss my beautiful dress, and scratched his ears. He twisted and licked my hands, keening softly.

  I turned back to Aiden, still kneeling, and simply asked, “How?”

  He shrugged. “I knew he was important to you. You already lost your father. I didn’t want you to feel like you’d lost Hachi too, when there was still a chance he was alive. Then, I got lucky.”

  I stared at him in amazement, absently running my hands through Hachi’s thick fur. Aiden stepped forward and, brushing aside some vines, pushed open a small, hidden door.

  I gaped at him. He had a hidden retreat out here in the woods? Who managed that? And why?

  “A little cloak and dagger, don’t you think?” I managed to choke out. “What on earth is this?”

  “Just come in and I’ll explain. I don’t like standing out here longer than necessary. Hachi will be okay. He has food and water, and you know he won’t run off.”

  I hesitated just a moment more but decided that if I was going to trust Aiden, I needed to trust him completely. No going halfway with this sort of thing. If I was going to do something, it had better be worth doing wholeheartedly. And I think that trusting someone fell into that category.

  The inside of the tree was carved out to form a small room. It was actually quite comfortable. I was nervous that it would be dark and claustrophobic when Aiden shut the little door, but it was surprisingly light. Looking up, I realized that small slots had been carved all around the trunk, too small to be noticed from the outside, but big enough for moonlight to creep through.

  And it wasn’t just a hollowed-out tree. There were rugs on the floor, cushions to sit on, and a table with books stacked on top of it. It looked like a home.

  “What is this place?” I asked again.

  “This is my place,” he said simply. “My father helped me make it. Whenever I needed to get away from the . . . life, I could come out here and no one would bother me. No one even knows it exists except my parents. And they know that I want to be alone when I’m here, so they usually leave me to my own devices.”

  “Wow,” was all I could say. A private retreat on palace grounds?

  “Yeah. Have a seat.” He directed me to the pile of cushions and watched me as I made myself comfortable. He gingerly sat in front of me, fidgeting with the fringe on one of the pillows.

  I certainly didn’t have anything else to add, and he looked really nervous, so I waited for him to say whatever it was that required him to drag me all the way out here. Not that I didn’t appreciate him sharing this place with me, but I wanted to know what was going on.

  He didn’t speak, and I had to prompt him. “Wasn’t there something you wanted to tell me?”

  He took a deep breath. “Yes. Yes, I’m just trying to think of the best way to say it.”

  “Well, you’re making me nervous. Just spit it out already,” I joked to lessen the tension.

  He laughed once. “I guess that would be the best way to say it, wouldn’t it? Okay. Here goes. Remember what we talked about the night of the first ball?”

  “We talked about a lot of things. What in particular do you mean?”

  “The, um, hypothetical situation. If I were the prince.”

  A beat passed. “Yes?”

  Aiden hesitated. “What if that wasn’t so
hypothetical?”

  I stared at him in disbelief. “If this is some kind of joke, I will kill you. And I’m completely serious.”

  “It’s not a joke.”

  “But . . . but that doesn’t make any sense! I’ve seen you and the prince at the same time!”

  He chuckled without amusement. “I have a body double. When I’m unavailable for public appearances, my father arranges for someone else to take my place. It’s not hard, since no one has ever seen or heard me before. Same basic body type, and the prince could be any number of personal servants.”

  I was completely baffled. “Why would you be unavailable for public appearances?” I asked, putting his words back at him. “Wouldn’t your princely duties overrule everything else?”

  “According to my father, perhaps,” he scoffed. “You have to understand everything, though. I haven’t told you the whole story yet.”

  “Please enlighten me.” My voice was flat.

  “You know that the prince cannot be seen or heard by anyone outside of the royal family and a few choice servants. One in my case—my nursemaid, who bathed, dressed, and fed me until I was old enough to do so myself. She was also the one to take measurements for clothes, requests for goods I wanted or needed, everything. She was my one link to the outside world.

  “And she was good at her job, but that’s all it was to her: her job. She distanced herself from me. I didn’t need another mother, my own was quite enough. I needed a friend. And she couldn’t be that for me.

  “I don’t know if you can imagine how lonely that is,” he whispered. “And then, I couldn’t take it anymore. I needed to be seen and heard, but I loved and respected my family too much to do anything to shame or embarrass them or the crown in any way.

  “So I began to sneak out and impersonate a normal kid.”

  “Those stories about you sneaking out of your room,” I murmured, remembering.

  He nodded. “It was too easy for me to get clothes and an extra mask. I simply had to ask for the first set, and it was given to me, no questions asked. Who would refuse a royal request? And once I had those, I quickly obtained a second set, because I knew once my father realized what I was doing, he would confiscate the first in an attempt to stop me. Which he did, but there was no stopping me.

  “It was so liberating to be out on the streets! To have the freedom to move where and how I pleased, and to speak to anyone and everyone . . . it was a dream come true for me.”

  “Eventually my father realized he couldn’t stop me, and I convinced him that I would be a better king if I wasn’t so sheltered. So he allowed me a position on the council where I could actually speak, which meant I needed an estate, and to go to all the royal functions as someone who could actually interact with others. That’s why he arranged for me to go with Arianna—he didn’t trust anyone else but a Lacie to keep my secret. He didn’t want to tell her at all, of course, but you can’t keep anything from them.”

  “How can I know this isn’t some elaborate hoax?” I asked, reaching for something solid to grab onto.

  “That’s the thing I want to show you. I want to prove my identity to you, the one way I can prove it with absolute surety. I want you to see me . . . really see me. All of me.”

  And then he did the unthinkable—he reached up and unhooked his mask. He set it gently down beside him and looked at me with such vulnerability that I could not look away.

  Right where my own Mark sat was a Mark of his own. Under his right eye was a tattoo of an outstretched wing set inside a crown: the royal seal. I’d heard that each member of the royal family was marked with it when they came of age. The queen received it when she married into the family. Even though no one could see it, it was to represent the pain of ruling, and it helped the royal family to never forget who they were and what they represented.

  “Aiden . . . ,” I whispered, staring at his face.

  He looked exactly as I’d imagined him, but it was so strange to see all of him. And I didn’t know what to feel at this revelation. Anger for him lying to me? Betrayal for him gaining my trust when he wasn’t who I thought he was? Or understanding for him finding a way through his loneliness? Compassion for someone I called a friend, someone I thought I loved?

  “I’m still the same person,” he insisted. “I never once pretended to be someone I’m not.”

  “I think I can understand why you did what you did,” I started out slowly, “but this is a lot to take in. I . . . don’t know what I’m supposed to make of it all. Or what I’m supposed to do or say.” I felt as vulnerable as if it were my mask on the floor beside me.

  “You don’t have to do or say anything. I just wanted you to know.”

  Something occurred to me then, the latter half of his story. “Is this the part where you tell me you found your bride and you’ll never see me again, and that this was your way of telling me good-bye?” There was no bitterness in my voice. Only sadness. I was losing him. I never really had him, and I was going to lose him.

  “Oh, no. I’ve found my bride, if she’ll have me,” he said, “but I really hope that doesn’t mean I’ll never see you again.”

  “Who is she?” I suddenly had to know.

  “Are you truly asking me that?” He looked at me, almost sadly, one eyebrow raised.

  “Clearly,” I said, indignant. “Am I not allowed to know until the official announcement or something?”

  He laughed. “I don’t think that would be a good idea. No, it’s nothing like that.”

  “Well, tell me then!” I was growing frustrated again.

  “I did.”

  “You did not!”

  “I said that my hypothetical situation wasn’t hypothetical,” he clarified.

  A moment passed. My eyes widened, and my mouth dropped open. “You mean me?”

  “If you’ll have me,” he said simply.

  “Are you insane?” I asked. “You can’t marry me.”

  “I think the question is if you will marry me.”

  “I couldn’t possibly! I can’t!” I protested.

  His face fell. “Why not?”

  “Because!” I thought it should be obvious. “I didn’t even know who you were until now. How could I possibly marry you?”

  “I’m still the same person,” he insisted again. “You know me already. You know me better than anyone else. You’re the one I want.”

  “Why?”

  “What?”

  “Why do you want me?” I persisted. “Because I know your secret? Is that the only reason?”

  “Of course not,” he scoffed. “I want you because—you said it yourself—you’re my best friend. You make me laugh and you make me work. You make me think about things in a different way, and you make me want to be a better person. You’re beautiful and strong, fierce and loyal. I couldn’t imagine myself ever being with anyone else.”

  I gulped, unprepared to deal with his sudden declarations. Those things he said made my heart swell and beat out rapid, syncopated rhythms, but one thing was missing.

  “And your veracity is what would make you a wonderful queen. You wouldn’t be bossed around or intimidated by anyone. You’d be a wonderful role model for the citizens. Things are changing, Evie. The king and queen are starting to speak for themselves. You heard the king in the council room, and I know there’s been gossip among the servants. And you hear me every day. I need a queen who isn’t afraid of that—of my voice.” He paused, watching my reactions. “And you’d be loved by everyone, I know it.”

  My breath hitched, and I dared to ask, “Even you?”

  “Oh, my lady, especially me.” He grabbed my hands and held them tight. “Didn’t you already know? Evie, I love you so much, I can’t put it into words.” He hesitated. “You know me better than anyone, and you know that I’m not much for flowery words and pretty declarations. All I can say is that I love you, and I want to be with you for the rest of my life.”

  I was dumbstruck.

  “Can you . . . ?
” he ventured to say. “Do you have any feelings for me, Evie? Any hope for me?”

  I tried to speak, but my mouth was so dry that I couldn’t get the words out.

  “If you can’t answer me now, that’s okay. And we wouldn’t have to get married right away. It can be an extended engagement for as long as you like.”

  “No,” I started to say, and his face looked absolutely devastated.

  “No?” He sounded so defeated.

  “I mean, no, I can’t answer you now.” I tried to make sense. “I mean, just give me a minute. I’m in shock.”

  He waited for me to continue, but patience never had been a virtue of Aiden’s. He fidgeted and shifted in front of me as I tried to gather my thoughts in some kind of coherent manner.

  He wanted me for his queen. Aiden, my silly, lovely friend was the prince, and he wanted me for his queen.

  I didn’t know anything about being a queen. I didn’t even know anything about being a noble. I didn’t know how to act or what my duties would be. I didn’t know any foreign languages, and I couldn’t even imagine hosting parties for visiting ambassadors without accidently insulting them somehow.

  But despite all of that, all of the reasons I should say no, I couldn’t look away from him, and I couldn’t forget the way it felt to dance in his arms or the way he looked at me as if I were the only one in the room. I wanted that. I wanted to keep that forever. I wanted to keep him. Because, most of all, I couldn’t imagine my life without him.

  I loved him.

  “First, I think . . . I want to say that I think I might love you too,” I said haltingly, reaching to touch his bare cheek. He shuddered under my touch, looking at me with bright eyes.

  “You think?”

  I was so overwhelmed I could barely speak. “I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m feeling, and I don’t know what love is supposed to feel like. But I think that’s what it is that I’m feeling right now. All fluttery, and like my heart is about to beat straight out of my chest.”

  His eyes burned into mine. “That’s what I’m feeling.”

  “And I think . . .” I took a huge breath. I was about to take a tremendous risk. “I think I want you to see me too.”